2/3

im left with no body
sick of dreaming someone
i lost my shape and my eyelids
i cant reach for the-
oh the air is so foggy
and i'm so overdone
i lost myself and my patience
just hand over the gun

hand it over

the world's longest sunday

Epilogue

it's been about three months since we last talked
i thought i'd leave a lasting mark
but you moved on faster than i thought
and sometimes i think i'm him
i still think i'm him
then i wonder where you've been
and then all my memories come tumbling down

when all is said and done
you pulled the trigger of that gun
those were my skull fragments that scattered all over your lawn
when everyone's dead and gone
i hope you'll remember this song
won't you close your sweet eyes
remember, you still hold me by the lungs

i still miss you

i feel so guilty
i tore your heart out
and i bet you miss me
but i got swapped out
well what can i say after i treated you that way

heavy tropes&ryo influence

Hold me by the lungs

seven months was a long time ago
and i know u know
that hes just for show
seven months since i let you go
and i hope u know
times been going slow

everytime i think about it
i get tearyeyed
and i start to cry

so instead ill put my head on your shoulder
i dont have that much time
uve given no closure
now im without a spine
i feel like i serve no purpose
but ive been given this life
and ill take it away
using a kitchen knife

Seven months kitchen knife

took a trip straight down to hell
i hope u know i meant well
(and i promise im okay
its just it just its for one day)
i took a shot then and it missed u
i kinda wish i kinda wish that bullet hit u
it ricocheted and it made a hole that i can see thru
and now u mention i can see it in the rearview

my lungs stopped working
i keep lurking
can u stop video recording
ur obession is so disconcerting
i dont understand whats so important

dont tell me that im bleeding
im on my knees im pleading
i know where this is leading
just give me one day
i dont understand this feeling
this feeling is so freeing
even though i dont know the meaning
it keeps me at bay

My faustian bargain (The kissing hand)

I already went, now its your turn

you scream so loud that you cough it all up
unnatural red as you throw it all up
i told you that cigarettes make your tongue shrivel up
dont know how much longer ill go i feel my legs giving up

dont downplay me
dont you feel any remorse?
your crying on your bedroom floor
ever been vulnerable before?
think im crazy
didnt you break your closet door?
woodchips sink in through your pores
splinters eating at your core

but just for you ill stay up til my eyes go red
ill hold on hanging by your thread
ill skip my train to stay with you instead
ill leave my brain and then ill look half dead
ill stay up til my eyes go red
ill hold on hanging by your thread
ill skip my train to stay with you instead
ill leave my brain to lay with you in bed
dont downplay me
dont you feel any remorse?
your crying on your bedroom floor
ever been vulnerable before?
think im crazy
didnt you break your closet door?
woodchips sink in through your pores
splinters eating at your core

Your hamartia (The scissor rabbit)

+ @caleblrt

but rest assured, ill take whats urs
theres something more
i seek support and ur falling short
want me to take u to the airport?

it makes me throw up
makes my head spin
just look around
i dont wanna grow, ill scratch my dead skin off
crying in the room that u had sex in
just slow down, just look around

protect my sins, i wrote a note
you took a hit, we still can't cope
you seek support, i'm on the low
but everything will never be the same again
and you're still here?
you see me leer back as im running
i dont wanna run into you
you're gonna show up again
but i dont want it
i dont want it
i dont want it because

it makes me throw up
makes my head spin
just look around
i dont wanna grow, ill scratch my dead skin off
crying in the room that u had sex in
slow down, just look around
u make me throw up, make my blood thin
look at u up and down
push me around, burn ur cigarettes into my arms
and when u show up in your mustang
oh i melt and i melt cuz i know how it felt

Bloodthinners, Pushing (+caleb)

from the skin of my teeth
from the skin in my cheek
the way u look makes my knees weak

ill wake up the next day in a pool of androgyny
can u explain how on ur worst days u can cry so prettily like a girl in the wind
twirl while ur skirt spins
whenever i lie, kick me in the chin
when did i become so thin

from the skin of my teeth
from the skin in my cheek
the way u look makes my knees weak
all the blood on my sheets
need to let myself breathe
he makes me seethe with jealousy

im sure youre fine, whats urs is mine
please preserve my spine, let it soak in brine
paint my nails, stab me with pins
bruise up all my limbs
play me like a game
shirts vs. skins
dont ever let me win

from the skin of my teeth
from the skin in my cheek
the way u look makes my knees weak
all the blood on my sheets
need to let myself breathe
he makes me seethe with jealousy

Sucker by proxy

take a pill and go to sleep
turn around and show your teeth
i dont care what the others see
watch me hanging from ur tree outside
pocket of bliss under ur sheets 
dont cry now
i found out why ur so scared

did i put u to sleep?
the better half of a week
i wont stare when you gently weep
i know u know im tongue tied
ill catch ull throw me aside
thats when i found out u never cared

i didnt plan it this way
now im watching u decay
i promised that id keep u safe
ur guts are all over the place

put me down
turn around
im seeing sounds now im too scared
put me down
turn around
im seeing sounds now im too scared

Dozer

your words come right out my mouth
i said look twice then give me the go ahead
head ... ahead ... head
the madder you get the lighter i tread
stab through like a dagger right into my head
well isnt it nice to take my advice

you make me feel like a boy
you make me feel like your toy
was all of this just a ploy
was all this to make a point
no i dont mean to annoy
i always try to avoid
so hard to talk through the noise
youre always muting my voice 
(x2)

Headache for the record books

Brief Exercise

today it is the way it is
my skin feels like silk thats about to rip
replay ur kiss all against my wish
u display and dismiss while i cant resist

if i lash out nothings personal, u dont need to know
if i come off too emotional, u can always say so

the bruise left on my neck, the scratch left on my chest
open the door and check, no ones home

abandoned my mirror, im 2 weeks in
and i cant be near her, im getting too thin
and ive been so bitter since that kick in my chin
u cant find a place that ur always safe in
ill cough up my lung while i feel it cave in
im not gonna do this again

if i lash out nothings personal, u dont need to know
if i come off too emotional, u can always say so
ever since i got a taste of that ethanol, ive been stuck in a lull
and i got so used to following ur protocol and now im too dull

jahn

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