Аудио запис на избрани стихотворения от част 3 на "Как наказва Бог" от Катерина Стойкова-Клемър. Можете да поръчате книгата от издателство ICU на този линк: http://icu-bg.com/

HGP Part3

Many times people have asked me what it is like to write poetry in a second language and what the difference is between writing in English and writing in Bulgarian.  

First, I want to say that I find joy in writing poems, and the joy of writing in English is identical to the joy of writing in Bulgarian. I think the pleasure of the creative process is universal and larger than an individual language.

Second, I have found that certain poems want to be written in English and certain poems want to be written in Bulgarian; in order to give each the opportunity to come to life, I need to be prepared and open to writing in both languages.  Furthermore, there are things that I myself want to say in one language, but not in the other. This is in part due to the fact that some poems I don’t believe would be understood completely—or as intended—in one language or the other, and I take that into consideration when I put bilingual or monolingual collections together. 

Additionally, I could write a poem in English that does not work well in English at all, but makes for a good poem in Bulgarian, and vice versa. This experience has taught me not to become too attached to my own ideas of which language I should be writing in and to be prepared to accept anything that comes my way. Some poems even come in a mixture, sort of a mess of languages, and some poems start in one language and at a certain point switch to another without my even noticing until much later in the process. 

I feel lucky to be using two languages for writing poetry, because translation can serve as a wonderful editing tool. If something doesn’t work in a poem or group of poems, translate it into another language to see what it looks like and to hear what it sounds like with completely different words. It will really make you think about what you wanted to say in the first place. Even if you think your poem is perfect, taking it apart and reassembling it in another language may give you ideas on how to say something differently. Very rarely when I translate my poems do the originals stay intact. 

English is wonderful for writing poetry because it has a large array of words to choose from. It’s one of the richest languages available. Also, the English language has many compound verbs that can be broken up creatively to make interesting lineation. No small advantage is the fact that virtually everybody speaks English, so you have the potential of a very large audience. 

On the other hand, Bulgarian is more musical than English. Most of the words are longer and seem to have more vowels. That makes Bulgarian more natural for employing rhyme and rhythm. I feel that when all else is equal, my poems sound better in Bulgarian. Whenever I read poems in Bulgarian to an English-speaking audience, I see how many people close their eyes to better hear and experience the poem. 

So, for you today I will read one of my own poems in two languages. First in Bulgarian, then in English. It has to do with writing in one language and not the other.


* * *

Език мой, враг мой.
Без тебе – кръв в устата.
Преглъщам, латинските
серифи дращят.
Език мой, брат мой.
Разкрасен, перфориран –
метална топка се търкаля
по зъбите като перверзен боздуган.
Език или смърт.
Език мой, труп мой.
Език мой, други мой приятелю,
когото предадох.
Невинният бяга гузен.
Език мой, вик мой –
вик от срам.
Език мой, лък мой –
отпускам те безстрелно.
Език мой, дом мой.
Прости ми. Няма ме.



My Tongue, My Enemy

Without you—blood in the mouth.
I swallow, the Latin
serifs scratch. 
My tongue, my brother.
Decorated, perforated—
metal ball rolls
along the teeth like a 
perverse arrowhead.
Tongue or Death.
My tongue, my own carcass.
My tongue, another friend 
whom I’ve betrayed.
Shouldering guilt,
the innocent start running.
My tongue, my scream—
scream of shame.
My tongue, my bow—
I release you with no aim.
My tongue, my home.
Forgive me. I am gone.

Thank you for listening to this installment of In My Own Accent. I look forward to sharing with you again next week.

Your host, 
Katerina Stoykova-Klemer

Writing in Two Languages

The Book Horrors

We write poems. We work hard at our craft. We learn. We get feedback from respected mentors.  We edit. We send work out for publication. It gets rejected. We are discouraged. We refuse to give up. We send work out again. Eventually, several poems get picked up in various journals. Maybe even one gets nominated for a Pushcart prize. We are beside ourselves with happiness, and oh, so proud. We tell our parents (unless the work is about them and may upset them), we tell our friends, rejoice and celebrate.  We are encouraged and optimistic, and we decide to start sending a book-length collection out. We have our pick of small and large presses, contests galore and open reading periods. So we send. 

Fast forward several years. The collection looks nothing like the one you started with, the title has changed twice, you have ordered and reordered the poems an unreasonable number of times. You have restructured it at least three times based on brilliant suggestions by writer-friends who were kind enough to read and comment.  Your friends have all published collections already, have had readings and book signings, and you are wondering what you are doing wrong, since, of course, you are a much better poet.

But one day, as they say in Bulgaria, the sun will rise on your street and you will get a call, or more likely an email, that your poetry book manuscript was picked up by a small press that would love to bring your work into the world. This will make you as happy as you can possibly bear to be happy, and you will be ecstatic for a very long time. Very long time, because you will be surprised to learn that it will take on average about a year to print and staple your manuscript and post it for sale on the press’s website. You will be very happy and will look forward to holding the book in your hand… until you get The Book Horrors. 

The Book Horrors arrive about a week before the release date.  They take the form of chills around your spine and severe anxieties, attacks of shame and the sinking feeling that, by publishing this book, you are making the biggest mistake of your life.  Why did you have to do this in first place? You are about to ruin any chance of a career in poetry you might have otherwise had. You should have arranged it differently. And since the manuscript got typeset, you wrote five other poems that would go great in the book. and now you know for a fact that the book could have been better. And the first poem? Is it really that strong? What will your writing teacher say? She never liked that poem? And what if nobody comes to the book launch party? (Side note – don’t worry. Your best friends and your closest enemies will be there, and that typically makes for enough of a crowd.) What if nobody buys it? (Side note – don’t worry, you won’t sell too many. Drop every expectation about the number of books sold. ) What if nobody notices it? (Side note – don’t worry. Chances are a couple of friends will do kind reviews in local papers.)

The Book Horrors don’t stay with you 24/7. They come unexpectedly and punch you in the gut, make you want to hide because you feel so exposed. Your first poetry book is coming out. You are hoping that it will change your life. (Side note – don’t worry. It will change your life. But not the way you think. It will change you, and then you will change your life. Because you have to step out there and own your book, your poems, even the front cover, which you may or may not love. You need to live up to the blurbs that your mentors wrote about you. And that’s a lot of responsibility and a lot of work. You also need to realize that this book is a snapshot of the best you are capable of on the date your book was accepted.  If you could have done better, you would have. Now it’s time to put your efforts into a new project. )

And The Book Horrors do go away  – shortly after the book launch party, after you fully realize and accept that the publication of this book was a big deal only for you, and maybe also for your publisher. For everyone else it was a relatively unemotional and distant event. Then The Book Horrors are replaced with a sense of a letdown, which only a new project can help shake off.  And yes, when you publish it, The Book Horrors will be back. And that’s okay. 

Your host
Katerina Stoykova-Klemer

The Book Horrors

Sallie Bingham's answer to my question: "What is the most important thing you teach your students?" Clip from Accents radio show on 09/16/2011.
(Complete show can be heard at http://katerinaklemer.com/audio/accents_091611.mp3)

Sallie Bingham, Writer

How to Handle a Rejection

For good or bad, rejections are the rule rather than the exception when submitting unsolicited literary work for publication. Below are some thoughts on what to do, what not do and what to remember when confronted with another “no, thank you” note.

1. No means no. If the publication passed on your work, it’s generally not a good idea to write to ask why, to try to convince them to change their mind, or to make them feel bad for hurting your feelings. If it had been a heartbreaking decision for them to not publish it, they might have volunteered this information when sending the rejection. Remember: don’t write back angry. If you are upset, wait a few days to cool off, and then send a thank you note instead. And please, never write hate mail to the editor. That doesn’t help anybody—you least of all. 

2. It’s not personal. Even if they accept work that you think is not as good as yours, or even if they are publishing your competitor poet-friend, they did not reject you to ruin your day. It gave the editor no pleasure to send back your work, and if she knows you personally, it probably caused her significant emotional anguish and pain. 

3. Rejection is nothing to be ashamed of. Remember: if publishing were easy, it wouldn’t be nearly as attractive. Publishing is difficult, but believe me, at some point it gets easier. If you persist with the big three (reading, writing and getting feedback) while continuously sending work out, one day you will get an acceptance, and not only that—very shortly afterwards, you will get several more, and everything will speed up from that point on because you will learn the art of what to send, and how and where to send it. 

4. Rejection is nothing to be proud of, either. In my view, it’s best to be neutral about it, and not invest strong emotions. Don’t wear it like a badge of honor. I advise against wallpapering your writing room with rejection slips. I can’t imagine a worse thing you could do for the energy in this room. 

5. Look again at the rejected work. Now that you have had the benefit of more time, reading and experience, would you send the same material again, or would you edit it further? Or have you written new stuff you like much, much better? It may be a good idea to send that instead, or mix and match old and new work.

I hope these thoughts have been helpful. Rejection won’t ever be fun, but it doesn’t have to cause discouragement and depression. Think about rejection the way you think about the weather. You cannot change it. Instead, you live with it and make the best of it. Good luck with your writing, sending and publishing. 
 
Your host,
Katerina Stoykova-Klemer

How to Handle a Rejection

Yes, the high-paying, packed-with-perks job of an editor for a literary publication is fraught with landmines. 

Well, maybe not fraught, and maybe not landmines, but there are times when you, the editor, dread opening your email. Especially during the days after sending out a long round of rejections. Because, more often than not, that’s followed by a few responses by mortally wounded writers.

These emails are very emotional, often in all capital letters, and generally fall into two categories.

The more benign kind is passive aggressive, where the authors try to change your decision, talk about their feelings and disappointment, admit they cried, insist they are the most talented writers in the country, actually send books and other unsolicited materials for you to see how wrong you were to reject them.

The more aggressive emails are outright angry, attack you personally, or your taste, or the publication, or the selection process, or all of the above. The authors still may add a few sentences regarding their genius, but it’s secondary to the main point and purpose of the communication.

The truth is, no matter how much you brace yourself for these outbursts, or how many you’ve received to date, each still blindsides you and ruins your day, makes you question why are you spending your time doing this after a long day at your paying job, instead of reading a book, watching a TV show or (gasp) writing your own poems.  

Below are my thoughts on how to deal with hate mail.

1. Always remember that it’s intended to make you feel bad. The person who sent you the note did not want your decision to go unpunished, so if you spend the day cycling between sulking and fuming, then yes, the hate mail achieved its goal. Try to put the negativity out of your mind and focus on taking care of something both urgent and long overdue.  

2. You are not a victim. Sometimes this is hard to remember, but it’s always a fact. You are an editor out of your own free will. Furthermore, you have the authority to make publishing decisions and, if you’ve done your best, you’ll feel you’ve made the right decision even after the hate mail arrives unapologetic in your inbox.   

3. Don’t respond. Don’t acknowledge the email or, worse, engage in an argument with its author. That won’t help anything. Neither the relationship, nor the communication, nor you, nor even the author of the note. In some ways, not responding actually may help this person. One day, years later, during breakfast, when he suddenly remembers his own reaction and flushes with shame over his oatmeal, he will at least have the face-saving hope that maybe nobody ever saw the email. 

4. Best to forgive and forget. That is the quickest way to move on. It’s much easier when you do not know the author of the email, and there is no chance you’ll bump into him at the next open mic. Then you can just delete the note and never think of it, or the person again. It will challenge you much more, however, if the note came from someone you considered a friend, or even from a student of yours. Then you’ll have to work on your own detachment, understanding and compassion to let go of any hurt and bitterness you may be harboring.

5. Remember why you started doing this in the first place. You did it out of love for writing, and desire to help writers. Because you wanted to learn about the process of editing and publishing. Because it feels good to read new, great work. Because it’s wonderful to make someone happy with an acceptance.  Because you were naïve when you first started. Yet now, after years of experience and communications with thousands of writers, you still believe it’s your dream job.

And to those who feel compelled to send their bile to the editors I have to say the following: There are many things you could do instead. Punch a pillow, eat a bar of ice cream, collect sea shells by the sea shore, join a gym, clean your room, to name a few.  I know it hurts. But it’s part of growing up as a writer, and if you continue sending, chances are it will happen again.  Then you will have another opportunity to react or not. My hope is that this time you write nothing, or a simple “thank you for your time and consideration.” You’ll instantly feel better about everything. I promise. 

Your host
Katerina Stoykova-Klemer

For Editors – When You Receive Hate Mail

For Editors:  Rejecting People You Know

I used to think that one of the hardest things I had to do as an editor was to reject the work of my friends. It turned out, though, that I discovered something harder – sending a “no thank you” note to a poetry mentor. I don’t regret doing it, but I dreaded answering his email for quite some time. This prompted me to write a few words about possible ways to feel less guilty when rejecting people you know, love, or feel obligation to in one way or another.

1. Find your yes. If you are saying “no” to their work, what are you saying “yes” to? The mission of your publication and its genre? The level of professional quality expected by the books you publish? The niche toward which the work will be marketed? For your own peace of mind, it’s a good idea to work through that first, and keep your “yes” firmly in mind while saying “no” to the submission. I read a brilliant book by William Ury, “The Power of a Positive No.” I recommend it to anyone who has difficulties sending rejections, or feels emotional anguish while doing it.  

2. Do it quickly. As soon as you know you want to say “no,” go ahead and do it. There is no point dreading and procrastinating, and it will not help you any if you flinch every time you open your email. Nor will it become any easier a month from now. 

3. You don’t have to like it. Rejecting people is and perhaps always will be my least favorite part of the job. But, it’s still part of the job. So, if you don’t think you can stomach disappointing your cousin, your best writing buddy, the guy who gave you a break once, or the publisher of your first chapbook, then spend some time considering if editing really is what you want to do. 

4. Be kind, and also, be strong. Since you know the person, answer personally. Do not hide behind other editors. If it was your decision, own it and take responsibility for it. That said, publishing decisions are not always only up to you, and sometimes you personally have to deliver “collective” bad news, even one that you may disagree with. The worst thing you can do then is to betray your colleagues by blaming the decision on them so that you can look good to your friend.   

5. Let go of any expectations about his or her reaction. This is tough. Ideally, you will immediately get a note back reassuring you that all is well, there are no hard feelings, and your relationship is intact. But, often this note doesn’t come. Understand that now it’s up to the other person to reach back to you, and sometimes they may need a little bit of time, especially if rejection was the last thing they expected. 

6. Learn from the experience. Karma works in beautiful ways and soon enough you will be on the other side, sending your work to people you know, or you’ve published in the past. Remember, they owe you nothing. It is not tit-for-tat. Or, for the very least, it shouldn’t be. So, when you submit to people you know, make sure you a) send them your best work, b) make it clear you fully realize and accept that your story or poem may not be selected and c) let them know  you rely on their clear and impartial judgment, especially if you are sending out brand new writing.

I hope these ideas have been helpful. Saying no and owning it is a wonderful quality. Best of luck to all of us who are trying to master it.

Your host
Katerina Stoykova-Klemer

For Editors:  Rejecting People You Know

Poet Lisa Williams reviews Mary Szybist's new poetry book, "Incarnadine" by Graywolf Press and Sarah Arvio's new book "night thoughts: 70 dream poems & notes from an analysis" by Knopf.


Accents on Books with Lisa Williams

Poet Steve Cope surprises radio host Katerina Stoykova Klemer with a poem dedicated to her. Clip from Accents - a radio show for literature, art and culture on 2/15/2013

A Poem by Steve Cope

Revelations

I am a Bulgarian poet. This may not seem like a big revelation to you, but I just found out. I found out through reading poems in Bulgarian for an anthology of contemporary Bulgarian poetry that I am currently editing. I found out not by reading the really good poems, for all really good poetry has something universal in it that seems to transcend language and place. No, I realized I’m a Bulgarian poet by reading really bad poems in my native language.

Read the rest here:
http://www.diodepoetry.com/v6n1/content/stoykova-klemer_k.html

(Audio clip from a live Accents show on 2/22/2013)

Revelations

How to make the most of your writing life

I believe that when we are born we are given three precious, finite, unsubstitutable treasures. These are time, body and mind. We need all three in order to write or to lead fulfilling lives, which, for so many of us means the same thing. 

Only while we have all three at the same time can we write our poems, get ideas for amazing novels, or conduct mental arguments with our own characters. I thought I’d share a few of my thoughts on how to take care of these three resources.

Time – I wish I had an hour for every time I’ve heard someone say “I don’t have time to write.” Remember – having time doesn’t guarantee that you will actually write. It takes a real writer to stick with writing and persist with it amidst the multitude of her obligations. This is important, because if you don't write when you don't have time for it, you won't write when you do have time for it.  Whether they realize it or not, when people say “I don’t have time for writing,” in many cases they actually mean “today I made choices for my time which left my mind and body with no power to sustain in me the desire to write.” My advice is to use the busy periods of your life as opportunities to develop your writer’s will and to strengthen your commitment to your art. In that way you will tremendously increase your chances for a productive creative life when your schedule does lighten up.

Body – Keeping your body healthy is an excellent investment in your writing. Sitting for long periods of time staring at a computer screen is insidious and physically very taxing, but we find that out the hard way after it’s too late. It’s amazing what parts start aching, hurting, become impossible to sit on, or otherwise start demanding attention and changes in your routine. And changes in your writing routine take a while to internalize and are often frowned upon by your muses. Being pain-free helps you concentrate. Remember that the less you move while working the more you need physical exercise.  So stretch. Walk. Lift weights. Massage your wrists. Strengthen your back. Relax your eyes often. Wear the right glasses. Also important is to create a writing space that you love and to find the perfect chair for your body and the perfect keyboard for your fingers. 

Mind – My Hopi Indian Teacher told me once that we have three important bones in our bodies: The funny bone, so that we can laugh at ourselves; the back bone, so that we can stand up for ourselves; and the hollow bone, for connection with the world of spirit. Your mind is your hollow bone and you have to take extra care to keep it clear of clutter, for this is where you live, and one of the best things you can do for yourself as a writer is to build a good home. Keep the space in your head open and clear, because if it is not, you will have trouble writing. I have found out the hard way that writing is not a matter of time, but a matter or of space. If you don't keep space in your head for writing, you won't write even when you have the time. So, how do we keep the mind clear? Into your day-to-day living, build meditation, mindfulness, and mind observation. I believe that a daily meditation practice would be beneficial for every writer.

So, time, body and mind. No one of these is more important than the rest. You need time to create space in your mind. You need mind to decide how to use time. And you need your body to connect all that and to create your work of art.

I hope these have been helpful.  Keep on writing, everyone! 

Your host
Katerina Stoykova-Klemer

How to make the most of your writing life

Scott Whiddon's answer to my question: "What is the most important thing you teach your students?" Clip from Accents radio show on 03/01/2013.

Scott Whiddon, Musician

Poet Lisa Williams discusses works by Chase Twichell and Rebecca Morgan Frank. Clip from a life Accents show on 4/19/2013.

Accents on Books with Lisa Williams 2

Katerina Stoykova-Klemer hosts Accents - A Radio Show for Literature, Art and Culture  on WRFL, 88.1 FM, Lexington, Kentucky every Friday from 2-3 PM. Listen live on your radio or stream from http://wrfl.fm. An archive of previous Accents shows is available at: http://www.katerinaklemer.com/radio .

The mission of the show is to promote the arts - local, national and international alike.

During different shows, you can hear poetry, fiction and non-fiction, learn about new books, cultural organizations, calls for submissions from magazines. You will hear radio plays and news about upcoming events. Katerina will interview local and international guests both in the studio and over the phone.

Listeners are invited to write poems, essays, short stories, or other creative works and to submit them. Local authors may be invited to come to the studio to read their own material, and others may be invited to phone in.

If you would like to submit creative work to be considered for the show, please send it, along with a brief bio to katerina.klemer@gmail.com. Please do not send attachments - rather, include the bio and work together in the body of the email.

If you are a spoken-word artist with recorded material that you would like to submit for consideration, please send a CD to:

Katerina Stoykova-Klemer
P.O. Box 910456    
Lexington, KY 40591-0456 

Accents Publishing

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