On the merry go round, the merry go round, the merry go round x4

On the merry go round, around and round and around we go 
On the merry go round, around and round and around we go 
When will it stop? Nobody knows
Don’t let me stay trapped here inside 

No

I’ve decided I’m gonna do my own thing
You have chosen to follow blindly 
I’m no sheep
I won’t follow the herd
I know something’s wrong
So I’ll be my own shepherd 
(My own shepherd)
Shepherd 
(My own shepherd)

On the merry go round, the merry go round, the merry go round x2

On the merry go round, around and round and around we go
If I want freedom I have to fight to get control
Run and break the doors 
Don’t look back, they don’t matter
Soar to where you’re meant to be
Where your soul is happy

Now

I’ve decided I’m gonna do my own thing
You have chosen to follow blindly 
I’m no sheep
I won’t follow the herd
I know something’s wrong
So I’ll be my own shepherd 
(My own shepherd)
Shepherd 
(My own shepherd)

My Own Shepherd

The burden you’ve placed on my
Shoulders is being removed
I can’t carry your torch, your pain
I don’t live for you
Endless hours I have spent 
Comforting your pride 
You choose clouds over sunshine 
But I crave the light

I forgive you
For everything 
It’s in the past
Don’t try to blame
Unload your baggage 
Let it be
No more battles
Or casualties 

My hesitation in life 
Comes from witnessing yours
You always gave up
Blamed someone else
Never admitting fault
But luckily I have learned how not to be
Picture perfect example
Of my worst fears

Forgive yourself
For everything 
It’s in the past
Don’t try to blame
Unload your baggage 
Let it be
No more battles 
Or casualties

Restraining Order

I have to remember to breathe
Brush the dirt from my knees
I just need to soar to the sky
But you have broken my wings
The only words you’ll listen to
Are the words that you want to hear
I just need to make peace
With your ghost

I’ve been patient long enough 
You aren’t listening 
You must release 
The hands around my neck
You have no more power
You can’t hurt me anymore 

I can’t stay away from you
Like you’re a drug that I’m addicted to
The wounds are still fresh 
Yet you return to my bed
As if last time never happened 
As if you never were cruel 
Like some sadistic shadow
Forever attached to me
Noooo

I’ve been patient long enough 
You aren’t listening 
You must release 
The hands around my neck
You have no more power
You can’t have me anymore

Sadistic Shadow

How could you possibly assume I’d let you in?
I’ve seen your kind before 
I won’t fall for it again
Stumble over cliches 
And manipulations
But my mind is my own
I won’t fall for it again

Repeating my mistake
Imagining another way
Feeling out of place 
Like I don’t belong here
Can’t you see me?
I am bleeding 
Can’t you hear me
Screaming your name?

For too long I let you have
Something you never deserved
One flash of your smile and
I cave in again
But history will not repeat tonight 
You can’t hurt me anymore
All my scars are healing over
And I’m not the same as before

Taking advantage of 
All the nice things I do for you
Now I see the real you 
I won’t become unglued 

Spewing hate and venom 
Trying to get a rise out of me
But I’m too old for these games
I won’t become unglued 

Taking my sanity 
Changing me into a
Creature that I don’t
Recognize or feel
What have you done?
Where have I gone?
Why didn’t I stop?
I’ll never know

For too long I let you have
Something you never deserved
One flash of your smile and
I cave in again
But history will not repeat tonight 
You can’t hurt me anymore
All my scars are healing over
And I’m not the same as before

Unglued

I can see the cracks forming
In our asylum made of glass
Each word throws a new stone
Breaking my home
I wish you would leave
Every minute breaks my heart
But I think you enjoy my pain
As if I didn’t feel at all

Masks up it’s time to pretend 
We’ll dance like this till the end
What did you expect you stupid girl?
He always leaves you so sad
A dozen years or so the rules don’t change
When will you learn?
Sore and lost from a midnight ride 
Sinful images plaguing my mind
Don’t speak a word, it never happened 
Don’t fuck it up now
You silly romantic, he’ll never change
What did you really want?

When it’s too late
When I’m too far away to see
You’ll drown in thoughts of me
But I won’t come back

I can hear you calling my name
In the dark where you like me best
I’ll play along forever 
I can never say no

Masks up it’s time to pretend 
We’ll dance like this till the end
What did you expect you stupid girl?
He always leaves you so sad
A dozen years or so the rules don’t change
When will you learn?
Sore and lost from a midnight ride 
Sinful images haunting me tonight 
Don’t speak a word, it never happened 
Don’t fuck it up now
You silly romantic, he’ll never change
What did you really want?

My worst mistake was trusting you
You’ve always betrayed me
But I won’t scream
Because that’s what you want

Midnight Ride

V1:
Misery invades me yet I don’t know why
Taking its toll, suffocating 
Could you please open the window?
I’m so tired, I’m not sleeping
The horrors keep repeating 
Let me please forget
Erase all the pain
Infest my mind with the laughter 
And all the love I so needed

Chorus:
Give me understanding
I don’t know why I lost you
Fill me with serenity
Make me strong enough to survive
Make me strong enough to survive

V2:
Would you please rescue me?
I am lost in the past 
It wants me to break down
All my mistakes cloud my vision
Teach me how to accept 
My flaws and their words
Every disappointment follows me
They just won’t fade away

Chorus

Open The Window

V1: 
Feeling powerless
And out of control
I tried my hardest 
But it wasn’t enough, ooo
Nothing about this makes any sense
Why am I holding myself back?

C1: 
I’ve been trying to embrace a selfish kind of healing 
The type where I just tune you out
I’ve been building a maze so deep 
You won’t find me
I just want to be on my own
Because all the mistakes I have made
Have turned me into stone
And all the promises you break
Eat away till I’m bones

V2: 
Always tomorrow, never today
Use any excuse, I know it’s a lie, ooo
Creating tension to push me away
Never leaving, never letting me breathe

 C1: 
I’ve been trying to embrace a selfish kind of healing 
The type where I just tune you out
I’ve been building a maze so deep 
You won’t find me
I just want to be alone 
Because all the mistakes I have made
Have turned me into stone
And all the promises you break
Eat away till I’m bones

C2:
And with all the years I’ve given you
I know I’ve done my time
Using words to beat me black and blue
Darling it’s over

Breaking Bones

Twisted Rag Doll

V1: The verdict has been announced 
They say that I’m guilty 
Life sentence to be served by you 
Darling don’t you see you’re all mine?

PC1: 
Wanting to run but forced to stay
I’m your prisoner I must obey
Can’t feel a thing, not even pain
Shackled to your world, no escape

Chorus:
Liars and thieves are after me
How can I outrun them?
Too much damage!
How can I beat the cold without your warmth?
I fought with every breath 
To conquer silence
Hurts like you always said 

V2:
Follow the rules or deal with consequences 
Don’t pretend you don’t deserve this 
Isn’t this what you always wanted?
Misery is the only truth you know 

PC1 +

PC2:
Forced to believe all your empty apologies 
Dragging me down but I can’t breathe 
I hear your lies and I’m screaming 
Like a child no control

No control

Chorus

Dancing In Storms

V1: Judge and jury gather around
Trial of my lifetime 
Execution could be underway 
But I fake more smiles

PC1: I’m still chained to this judgement 
Where’s my defense?
For the truth is worse
Than the lie I have told

T: You aren’t me
Don’t judge me 
I’m not ashamed 
I’m lost

Chorus:
This secret I don’t want you to know 
It would kill you
I can’t let you know

V2: Lying here, full of frozen fear
What have I done?
I just wanted to enjoy a night 
No regrets are allowed 

PC2: But if you had been there 
Waiting for so long
For a chance I’d never get
Am I still wrong? 

T + C

C2: This was not a mistake
Thought this would never happen to me
Maybe I should redo 
Everything I’ve undone 

End:
Oh the trials over
The verdict is in now
I’m being quiet now
The verdict is guilty 
I’m guilty 
Life sentence

Alisha Rose