Hidden Inside

Today I live inside.
I exist through the 
Motions, the notions
Of every day life.

I walk the same walk,
As I have every day
Since I came to this 
School. Falling in line.

Today my head spins
To the music of last night’s
Dance. I haven’t learned how
To use two left feet.

I fell many times, tripping
Over my own fear. Running
From the writhing pain of
The belt’s down beat.

Smack
Smack
Smack
Leather against my back.

The familiar steps had
Lost their grace, their
Ease with which I followed.
I had decided that

Last night was the last
Dance. The last chance
To save my soul from 
Becoming this vacant hole.

Today I live inside.
Waiting for the when those
Thirty pain pills and 
Shots of Tequila

Tango inside my body.
The finale of the dance
Recital. The final beat
To be played by me.


Alyssa Rene Serville

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