They Say She

- Michael Gomez
- Kamila Mercado
- Alfredo Fernandez
Publishing: Monstar Entertainment Sound Studios (BMI)
Produced by Michael Gomez
Recorded and Mixed by Michael Gomez at Busy Studios, MIA
Guitar, Bass and Percussion by Michael Gomez
K4MI appears courtesy of Kamila Mercado

Perfect Angels

A Few Tricks (Abandoned Version)

copper tooth

You ever have one of those days where gravity just isn't your friend? This one's for you.
"Woe To The Wobbly Waitress" is a short, chaotic blast of early 90s-inspired garage punk. We're talkin' raw, lo-fi, and DIY, with a frantic tempo, buzzsaw guitars, and shouted female vocals. It’s the story of a heroic deed gone horribly, painfully, and hilariously wrong.
Crank it up, smash a plate, and scream along.

Lyrics:

[Intro] 
ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR!
[Verse 1] 
Slingin' hash in this greasy pit Got a head full of static, I'm so sick of this shit! My coffee pot's a weapon, my apron is a shield But my own damn feet are a goddamn battlefield! Gravity's my nemesis, the floor's my biggest foe Every single shift is a disaster-stomp-and-go!
[Chorus] 
CRACK! SNAP! POP! THERE GOES THE ANKLE! THREE DAMN PLACES, A BRAND NEW ANGLE! WOE! TO THE WOBBLY WAITRESS! A WALKING, TALKING, BREAKING MESS!
[Verse 2] 
Some old dude's wheelchair gets stuck in the jamb "I'll help you out, sir! Yes I can, ma'am!" Gave a mighty shove, a heroic lurch Left me sprawled out on the floor of this greasy church! My tray of fries went airborne, a sickening CRUNCH Became the floor's disgusting, soggy lunch!
[Chorus] 
CRACK! SNAP! POP! THERE GOES THE ANKLE! THREE DAMN PLACES, A BRAND NEW ANGLE! WOE! TO THE WOBBLY WAITRESS! A WALKING, TALKING, BREAKING MESS!
[Bridge] 
They wrapped me up in plaster, told me "take a rest" Put my fucking charity to the test! Said I was a hero, so brave and so good WHILE I'M SERVING PANCAKES ON A CHUNK OF WOOD! Well, NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED, that’s the ugly truth! I got a splintered fibula for being sweet to youth!
[Guitar Solo]
[Outro] 
WOE TO ME! WOE TO ME! THREE! BROKEN! PLACES! THANKS FOR NOTHING! UGH!
[END]


Copyright Russell Nomer August 4, 2025 ASCAP Work ID 931338469 ISRC: QT5AM2538469


Drunk Words

Andrew Parsons

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