Upon Leaving It's Home Dimension, Our Machine Elf Learns That the Universe is  a Dangerous Place

A Musical Interpretation Regarding How I Feel About Tits

Seriously, check out the Curran brothers for their epic Scottish war chants and their technical analysis that'll make you rich if you're not a paper-handed bitch fanny and actually have the balls to go all in. 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCI24I7XHA2yY4Fs-pVmplpA

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UChQTEaC6d7sR42BUYqoxTmg

"Buy the dip, pussy"-Warren Buffet

Lofi GME Bardic War Chants, GameStop Shares will Make you Rich

Jaime Commercial Request Rough Draft

Jaime Price Is Right Really

Intro Jaime BING BONG 70'S GAME SHOW

Bing Bong Game Show Rough 2nd Draft

Intro Jaime BING BONG 70'S GAME SHOW 3

Euro Gayed Up Bing Bong Game Show

Here you go. If the worse happens, and you have to mow down a gang of looters with an uzi to defend your toilet paper reserves, just put on headphones, dial this to 11, and turn those toilet paper stealing mother fuckers into a puddle of sinew and impacted fecal matter. This is the soundtrack to the apocalypse

Girl, You Got That Phat 70's Bush Hanging Out the Bikini the Way I Yearn for It to Do!

Corona Virus Soul Fuck

Corona Virus Soul Fuck Remixed

My wife wanted to help get people listening to my music and said I could use her pic if I wrote a song about what I love the most about her. 

This is why I practiced guitar for hours and hours a day as a small boy. For the tits. Big ass titties.

It's All About Big Ass Titties

My buddy Nate sent me an acoustic and vocal track, I turned it into this. Melodyne for backing vocals and a bunch of Cubase plugins for everything else. I improved a solo over it. The solos a little too Rock and Roll, but I am a lot "too rock and roll".

Chaos And Clothes Cover

Simple Twist Of Fate (Feat. Nate "The Dietzicle" Dietz)

This is the final installment in my trilogy about titties. My titty trilogy, if you will. Check out the first two installments, "It's All About Big Ass Titties" and "With Great Titties Comes Great Responsibility". 

My work is done, my legacy cemented. Cemented in the annals of titties.

Slap Them Titties Around

You Getting Yo Dick Sucked, Under Moonlight and Shit, All Romantic

Getting Yo Dick Sucked, Under Moonlight And Shit, All Fucking Romantic Like

It's summertime and some girls got what you need going on!

Girl, You Got That Phat 70's Bush Hanging Out the Bikini the Way I Yearn For It To Do!

Donald Trump is a monster. I used Vocaloid 5 for the vocals, and Trump's own words for the rest.

A Romantic Night Out with Donald Trump and Jeffrey Epstein

While I was finishing this song, two people completely unrelated to each other and without prompting commented how AnsonianThunder seems to be influenced by Frank Zappa.  

In honor of this synchronicity, I decided to name this song after the greatest line of prose ever written. “He sniffed the reeking buns of angels” is a line from Zappa’s “Broken Hearts are for Assholes”. A song that is not only a timeless story and tear-jerker about a demented crossdresser named Sir Richard Pump-A-Loaf, but also a polemic to all pussy-ass bitches who have and will incarnate throughout the time and space we as fellow humans all share. 

I leave you with this. In these trying times, do not forget the sentiments espoused by Zappa in “Broken Hearts are for Assholes”. Go forth and “Ram it, Ram it, Ram it in the Poop Chute. Cornhole.”

The Reeking Buns of Angels

I Told My Parents To Fuck Off. I Quit Junior High. Now I Am A Rock Star.

I am a guitar player who plays mostly Blues, Jazz, and Rock. This is totally out of my wheelhouse. It was inspired by a backing track I was noodling over. I decided to see if I could create something inspired by it in Cubase. I dug what was going on so I decided to try and take the experiment further. 

I used Vocaloid 5 to create the vocals, as I am a horrible singer. I programmed every instrument (including vocals) that isn't guitar via MIDI and recorded the guitar parts conventionally. It's a brave new world.

For the lyrics, I just tried to come up with corny "pop" lines on the spot as I was programming each section of the song. The guitar is my heart and soul on display (what little there is of the two, anyway), even if the rest is MIDI programming. 

I used Cubase 10.5 Chord Tracks for most of the piano/synth, EZ Keys for the more complicated piano/synth intro, Superior Drummer 3 for the drum tracks. I recorded my guitar DI with a line 6 helix stomp and used a mix of my guitar transposed down an octave, EZ bass, and a Contrabass synth generated by the Cubase chord track for the bass parts.  I created the vocals with Vocaloid 5.0.  Mixed and mastered with the help of Izotope Neutron and Ozone.

All in all, I think this is not easily discernible as a mostly computer/MIDI/synth generated creation. Let me know what you think and thanks for the listen!

Destiny

Sometime you gotta get back to your roots.

Another Song Were I Wank My Guitar in Masturbatory Fashion

My Bitch Acting Crazy Again, Making Me Feel All Melancholy and Shit

My Bitch Acting Crazy Again, Making Me Feel All Melancholy And Shit

God Damn Hippies Always Be Stealing My Weed

This is the follow up to my last song,  "God Damn Hippies Always Be  Stealing My Weed".

I Found Them Hippies That Stole My Weed And Kill They Bitch Ass

I Found Them Hippies That Stole My Weed And Killed They Bitch Ass

I have been told that the best way to attain clout is to challenge someone to a rap beef. So I am trying it out.

Tekashi 69 Can suck My Old Fat Dick

Tekashi 69 Can Suck My Old Fat Dick

Here's a video I made for this song: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78aEje04OF8&ab_channel=AnsonianThunder

I used a vocal sample from Cubase 11's Bloom sample pack and made the rest with MIDI or my guitar. The synth solo is a guitar solo I converted to MIDI and loaded into Halion 6, for example. I did this with the bass line as well I used Superior Drummer and EZ Keys as well and programmed some of the keys by hand.

Hipster Trash Love Junkie

I just discovered Splice. The vocals are a sample that I found there and I made the rest via either MIDI or my guitar.

She Always Take Me Back

She Always Takes Me Back

Pimping is difficult work. Especially if your bitch is overly fine.

An Overly Fine Bitch, Scheming

I don't mind the abductions so much, I love teaching any entity the fine galactic art of low down dirty an' mean funkaliciousness, but why aliens, why do you always conduct medical experiments on my rectum before, during, and after the lessons? 

I mean just once, can we do the lesson on Tuesday and then say maybe the rectal probe on Thursday? Is that too much to ask?  Fucking aliens ....

Aliens Always Abducting Me, Making Me Teach Them Funk and Shit Like That

You Think A Girl Is Shy But Turns Out She A Satan Loving Sexual Freak

I like to make love to my women like a panzer tank on methamphetamine.

A Romantic German Love Song For Tender Sweet Moments

Not Even Your Chains Are Free

When Your Girl Both The Highest Class and Lowest Class Bus Station Skank in the City

When Your Girl Both The Highest Class And Lowest Class Bus Station Skank In The City

A Machine Elf Departs Its 11nth Dimensional Existence. Its Comrades Sing in Mourning.

Our Intrepid Machine Elf Enters The Void Between Dimensions And Meets A Strange And Wonderous Human

AnsonianThunder is not a man but is a force of nature. It incarnated in 3rd-dimensional time-space reality with one mission. To lay down the sickest, most vicious and sadistic guitar lines possible. 

AnsonianThunder pulls guitar lines straight from the hoary and timeless nether regions of the human soul. When it lays its hand on the fretboard, notes sound with the power and fury of 10,000 big-legged women twerking in unison. 

It is interested in only two things. Tits and the acquisition of more tits.

AnsonianThunder

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