prod. fendi444 (@fendi444)
mixed by LXXIV (@adam-vanscoyk)

lyrics:

[citrate]
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me

cuz i’m getting sick of always feeling like shit
yeah i am so fucking sick of always feeling like shit
cuz i’m getting sick of always feeling like shit
yeah i am so fucking sick of always feeling like shit

act like it’s a problem i have female friends why
all you do is talk to all my friends and it’s alright
for my own sake this has to end bye
if we take a break bet you'll fuck my friend no surprise

doesn’t make sense now does it
making me anxious suspense now what if’s
then you tell me that it’s fine so fuck it
did it then you started crying you’re dumb bitch
doesn’t make sense now does it
making me anxious suspense now what if’s
then you tell me that it’s fine so fuck it
did it then you started crying you’re dumb bitch

why are you changing my outlook on love
constantly talking bout guys that you fucked
leaving me hanging here i’ve had enough
losing my friends cuz they’re girls bitch it’s rough

you never go days without taking offense
i never do nothing it doesn’t make sense
you truly control me you cannot defend
you truly control me you shouldn’t pretend

and my friends aren’t real no they’re not
and my friends aren’t real no they’re not
and my friends aren’t real no they’re not
and my friends aren’t real no they’re not

why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me
why do you control me

cuz i’m getting sick of always feeling like shit
yeah i am so fucking sick of always feeling like shit
cuz i’m getting sick of always feeling like shit
yeah i am so fucking sick of always feeling like shit

control [prod. fendi444]

feat. gorejit (@gorejit)
prod. ingram11 (@ingram11mac)
mixed by LXXIV (@adam-vanscoyk)

lyrics:

[citrate]
lie to me tell me that i’m something 
just so i can feel the way i used to before nothing
lie to me tell me that i’m something 
just so i can feel the way i used to before nothing

life’s not guaranteed
please don’t fuck with me
got my blood all over it’s leaking right from the seams
life’s not guaranteed
please don’t fuck with me
unsure bout reality my life’s not what it seems

got like five more hours off the tab
and there’s nothing i can do except yell
ima fry your router you a fag
just wait i’ll behead you like the cartel

i hate myself you can see it in my eyes
can’t control my urges and i’m best friends with my knife
all you fuckers use me then you leave me in demise
tell my mother sorry when i die by suicide

i just wanna feel okay and live my life but i cannot ever do it cuz i’m fucking crazy
when i take my golden blade and cut your eyes bitch i hope you realize that you fucking made me

bitch ima eat your organs
leave you deceased in portions
bro you make me fucking hungry with all these contortions
bitch ima fuck your organs
and all my guns imported
so please don’t be surprised when you all see this drum start pouring

[gorejit]
yeah yeah yeah
ima kill that bitch just like elliot
i feel like i'm dead i need my medicine
i look like i'm dead eat your organs
vomit in a two seat its a foreign

reconstrict my body in debris
g19 with a m9 on a killing spree
eyelid full of lsd
i can't even fucking see
take a trip to saudi and i'm bringing extra magazines
stream that bitch on liveleak

[citrate]
lie to me tell me that i’m something 
just so i can feel the way i used to before nothing
lie to me tell me that i’m something 
just so i can feel the way i used to before nothing

life’s not guaranteed
please don’t fuck with me
got my blood all over it’s leaking right from the seams
life’s not guaranteed
please don’t fuck with me
unsure bout reality my life’s not what it seems

NOTHING (FEAT. GOREJIT) [PROD. INGRAM11]

i choose suicide.
prod. fendi444 (@fendi444)
mixed by lxxiv (@adam-vanscoyk)

lyrics:
[citrate]
contemplate suicide it’s an every day thing
lots of veins in my eyes cuz nothings fucking changing x2

and i don’t know why but it’s fine i’m still alive
fucking joking it’s been years of this i wanna die
panic fucking panic fuck it i might lose my mind
i choose suicide
i choose suicide

say they’re there for me but where are they when i need them
rip my hair to pieces kill myself they will see then
every day i bleed because you leave me in the dirt
i hope that you see that you’re the reason why i hurt

taking medication doesn’t help me and i know that
everyone is basic they dispel me bitch i know that
everybody faking it compels my feels to go back
to the medication love the hell i feel on prozac

i cancelled therapy and i don’t know why i did it x2

oh yeah cuz i thought you were there for me but obviously not
wasted all my fucking time i hope that you rot
i’m a fucking idiot for thinking you were not
the same as my ex why the fuck are you all thots

taking acid just to get you out my fucking head
i’m relapsin so much blood i turned my blanket red
time is passin and i’m thinking bout the shit you said
have a fraction of my bleeding you’re so fake misled

fucking wish that i could stop feeling psychotic
and i wish i was the one i know i’m not it x2

contemplate suicide it’s an every day thing
lots of veins in my eyes cuz nothings fucking changing x2

and i don’t know why but it’s fine i’m still alive
fucking joking it’s been years of this i wanna die
panic fucking panic fuck it i might lose my mind
i choose suicide
i choose suicide

suicide [prod. fendi444]

prod. fendi444 (@fendi444)
mixed by LXXIV (@adam-vancsoyk)

lyrics:
hate it when you say that you wanna stay
you should go away cuz i’m not okay
got a lot of pain that i don’t display
i just always say that i am okay x2

cuz i do not wanna deal with all your shit
you’re abusive as fuck and you’ll never admit
that you used me for attention so i guess it all makes sense
why you’re acting like a fucking whore in front of all my friends x2

wait
i can’t call them my friends
cuz they’re low tier faggots and they always defend 
you cuz you act like a victim you don’t make sense 

we both know what you did to me so i put an end
to it all
oh did i offend
see you fall
cutting all my friends
i recalled
had to make amends
you just stalled

hate it when you say that you wanna stay
you should go away cuz i’m not okay
got a lot of pain that i don’t display
i just always say that i am okay x2

cuz i do not wanna deal with all your shit
you’re abusive as fuck and you’ll never admit
that you used me for attention so i guess it all makes sense
why you’re acting like a fucking whore in front of all my friends x2

ok [prod. fendi444]

prod. fendi444 (@fendi444)
mixed by LXXIV (@adam-vanscoyk)

lyrics:
i don’t even know who is real
all of you confuse me i don’t know how to feel
and i should know who is real
guess that you can see i need to go and fucking heal

what’s the point of loving me then hitting me
at this point you probably should get rid of me
i’m destroyed you cheated are you kidding me
in a void defeated please don’t pity me

from the first time to the last time go away now
i know you want me right back i can’t stay now
tryna heal but you stabbed my back i’m afraid now
i can’t feel cuz trauma i’m trapped in my brain now

fuck me over act like everything’s fine
fuck me slower scratch my nails on your spine
i’m becoming sober and it’s harder to find
any fucking closure get the fuck out my mind

fucking took it all and then you stabbed me in the back
i’m so shook i’ll fall into another fucking trap
why are you obsessed with making me feel so damn bad
why are you obsessed with me you know you make me sad

yeah
yeah
i'm so fucked i’m pulling right apart like yeah 
yeah
yeah
cut a fuckin hole inside my heart like yeah

i don’t even know who is real
all of you confuse me i don’t know how to feel
and i should know who is real
guess that you can see i need to go and fucking heal

what’s the point of loving me then hitting me
at this point you probably should get rid of me
i’m destroyed you cheated are you kidding me
in a void defeated please don’t pity me

from the first time to the last time go away now
i know you want me right back i can’t stay now
tryna heal but you stabbed my back i’m afraid now
i can’t feel cuz trauma i’m trapped in my brain now

trauma [prod. fendi444]

prod. fendi444
mixed by LXXIV

i've struggled many long years with ocd. i've dealt with every subtype from harm ocd to existential ocd. i am better now but this song was made while panicking at 3am a year ago. i hope you find comfort in this song if you suffer from ocd.

lyrics:
i don’t know what to do 
tortured by ocd 
these thoughts are flowing right through 
my mind cant disagree
and i’m so worried i’m screwed irrationality
i try to cope but ensue
i tried out therapy

nothing changes nothing’s right
should i face it should i hide
nothing changes nothing’s right
should i face it should i hide

scared i might kill myself why’s this happening
and i’m obsessed bout crazy shit like reverse gravity
and yeah it feels like hell it’s so saddening
feel like i’m not in control i feel crazy stop attacking me

i got scary thoughts based around eternity
and i try to stop but my mind is hurting me
and i’m up at night panicking bout certainty
so i try to fight through my day while burdening

thoughts coming in they inside of my head bitch
stop coming in i don’t wanna be dead bitch
don’t wanna kill wish i could get some leverage
don’t gimme pills hanging on by a thread bitch

thoughts coming in they inside of my head bitch
stop coming in i don’t wanna be dead bitch
don’t wanna kill wish i could get some leverage
don’t gimme pills hanging on by a thread bitch

i don’t know what to do 
tortured by ocd 
these thoughts are flowing right through 
my mind cant disagree
and i’m so worried i’m screwed irrationality
i try to cope but ensue
i tried out therapy

nothing changes nothing’s right
should i face it should i hide
nothing changes nothing’s right
should i face it should i hide

OCD [prod. fendi444]

featuring LXXIV (@adam-vanscoyk)
prod. fendi444 (@fendi444)
mixed by LXXIV (@adam-vanscoyk)

lyrics:
[citrate]
i know that my life goes one way
downhill life is always leading me astray
i know that my life goes one way
downhill there’s nothing else i can say

i’m not scared i just have nobody i just need some help
i’m aware that you’re hella slutty put my mind through hell
please don’t stare you’re not fucking funny you should off yourself
i’m compared to your ex you’re scummy but you’re hot as hell

everybody hates me why don’t you
everybody hates me you should too
and i don’t know what to do yah

so i cut myself with all my fucking knives
i wanna trust myself but i just hate my life
i wanna love myself you know i’ve fucking tried
but all these sluts from hell are gonna take my life

fucking leave me alone why you wanna know
what the hell i’ve been up to with all these other fucking hoes 
you made me this way it wasn’t something that i chose
that i chose

lately i’ve been having thoughts of killing you and every single one of your stupid ass friends
hopefully i get my chance i’m willing to stab you until your pathetic life ends

i know that my life goes one way
downhill life is always leading me astray
i know that my life goes one way
downhill there’s nothing else i can say

i’m not scared i just have nobody i just need some help
i’m aware that you’re hella slutty put my mind through hell
please don’t stare you’re not fucking funny you should off yourself
i’m compared to your ex you’re scummy but you’re hot as hell

[LXXIV]
if god got me where i am then where does he go late at night
mind is racing devil on my back but he's no where in sight
befriend all the demons at my door ready to fight  fight
dead man walking off the pills, no i'm not living right

pain killers causing my pain, they keep controlling me
doc said i've gone insane, they grab ahold of me
put the poison into my veins, till i can never see
follow me into the dark, where i feel vacancy

vacant minds tend to think alike, lets go fantasize
you decide, if we’ll take our life, see the sunrise
I need help, imma turn the tide, at least I’ll try
yeah, I’ve been in my mind

I need help, I need help, I need help
I need someone that can save me from myself x2

[citrate]
i know that my life goes one way
downhill life is always leading me astray
i know that my life goes one way
downhill there’s nothing else i can say

i’m not scared i just have nobody i just need some help
i’m aware that you’re hella slutty put my mind through hell
please don’t stare you’re not fucking funny you should off yourself
i’m compared to your ex you’re scummy but you’re hot as hell

help [feat. LXXIV] (prod. fendi444)

citrate (@areizaga)
shisui (@shisuiwuzhere)
LYRICS:

shisui:
sendin shots we watch your body sesperate from your soul
cannot walk outside the house unless i’m grippin on this pole
yeah you say you finna stab me but your blade is lookin dull
yeah i sold your gang some perks that are laced with fentanyl 
(hook)
yeah i know i’m in your head
no you cannot talk to me cuz you’re a fed(2x)
(verse)
we slidin on your block we leave your crew dead
weird as fuck bringing up shit i said
you talking on the net we filling you with lead
like we gon run up and snatch that chain on your neck
(hook)
yeah i know i’m in your head
no you cannot talk to me cuz you’re a fed(2x)

citrate:
load my sawed off two bullets for us
please don’t leave now or else i will cut
and i fought off all my urges once
bitch you’ll bleed now cuz you are a cunt
running round in circles all up in your fuckin head
i just wanna know why all you pussies get so pressed
been like 7 days since i’ve taken my fuckin meds
why you bitches always be fakin that you depressed
stop talking to me i don’t wanna hear it all you bitches dumb and your best friend  is a weird bitch
stop talking to me i don’t wanna hear it all you bitches dumb and your best friend  is a weird bitch
putting my blade in my fucking neck bitch
all these fucking bitches tryna fuck my setlist
gripping on her throat i ripped off her necklace
i don’t give a fuck bitch you always get pissed
making me feel like im not alive
stab you in the heart until you die

IN YOUR HEAD (ft. citrate & shisui)

wtf [prod. copiya]

https://soundcloud.com/m_ay77 https://soundcloud.com/guapsensei https://soundcloud.com/akvri
all mixed by guap
instagram.com/nowarden_
instagram.com/guapsensei
twitter.com/nowarden_
twitter.com/iluvmyscissors

LYRICS https://genius.com/Nowarden-decay-lyrics

DECAY

DECAY (FT. CRAIG SCISSORHANDS) (PROD. AKVRI)

i hate music .. The world is a Fuck !

mixed by @1myojin

ok [prod. fendi444]

citrate

Recent comments

WalkingInTheVxid

Suixide By Seppuku (CSM-Seppuku)

Suixide By Seppuku (CSM-Seppuku)

abraxus

Related tracks