Jojo's Favorites: SOUNDCLOUD EDITION

Video coming out May 26th.

AlaskanSam as Gundham Tanaka
SnakeBite126 as Ace Ventura
Kamren as Monokuma
Written by Trakked and Dani
Beat produced by Adamack
Thumbnail by Trakked

Battle:
Gundham:
I await in the very depths of hell for my rival
However, unlike your sequel, there shall be no revival.
You've the mind of a child and the body of a skeleton
You shall be another cowering at my deadly malevolence 
Human life does not concern me; yet your films certainly do
Because racism is one of your many abundant issues!
Even for a demon like myself, I cannot tolerate you
A failed SeaWorld attraction that no one could operate, too!?
Kehehe.. another beastspeaker; it seems your feats are weaker.
Toppled a tribe, yet still put in a deeper sleeper
I would curse you with a short life, yet that is too late
For you've already gone and erased your own fate

Ace:
Skunk-hair wants to squabble 'gainst the Ace of spitting swiftly?
You must be simply sickly if you think you're looking spiffy
You kinda tick me, so I'll just unleash the kitties
Then your deadly little devas would be deadly little mincemeat
(Fast rap)
You look in the garbage for your attire, I wear Hawaiian and I spit fire
No more nice guy, you make me tired, putting an end to the Ultimate Tryhard
(Normal Rap)
You're at least D tier, so you better not come crying
I'd say your name was cool buuuuut that'd be lying

Gundham:
You DARE insult my namesake?! I'll tear you limb from limb!
Though not even my malice can contest your endless sins
Dare to talk about style? Kehehe, I'll keep that noted,
Save it for the times you've been constantly transphobic! 
Your name may have come back, yet it still isn't the same
For you've eroded past your prime and now a Jr. claims your fame
I would savor the stew of death and add you as an ingredient,
Though I wouldn't want to share hell with you, sexual deviant. 

Ace:
Alrighty then, this skunk should get a brain surgeon
The Ultimate Breeder but still died as a virgin
Even with your shitty deathmatch, I'd expect some better flows, 
But just like your kill, you can't do jack shit on your own!
And no, you’re a creature of something, keep on braggin’
When you’re looking like you only lived off of Dungeons and Dragons
Rhymes more absent than your father, he shoulda laid off the booze, sir
He didn't see his son grow up a loo-hoo-hooser
See, I'm walking over you just like your execution
Making pentagrams won't save you from being an intrusion
When I'm finished porkin' Sonia, I'll steal this win in my car
Call me if you wanna die a third time; here's my card


Gundham Tanaka vs Ace Ventura - Danganronpa vs Anything

Happy 6 year anniversary of TRBoCS! I wasn't able to get a video out but I hope this makes up for it! I love you guys and stay tuned for the video release!

TERRIBLE RAP BATTLES OF COMIC SANS
MONOKUMA
VS
THE ANNOYING ORANGE
BEGIN!

Monokuma:
I am Monokuma and I’m your headmaster 
Here to blend a delectable drink to have with my next platter
Bite your tongue, kiddo, it’s way past nya nya time
You’ll find this battle’s like the dictionary, Orange’s got no rhymes
So I’ve got my dukes up 
Flow smooth like butter - Mondokuma
I’ll block your sound like a Deluxe Room
Leave you spinning like a pinwheel pinwheel pinwheel of doom
This orange killer’s the most socially inept in his whole dang kitchen  
Passion Fruit gets your juices flowing? You’re an OJ simp, son
It’s just so sad that you’re a heel, with all your pals made diet meals
In modern times, you can not deal cause now you’ve lost all your a-peel
Broadcasting killing games to leave the flames of hope extinguished
But thinking about it now, I should’ve just went with your show on CN 

Annoying Orange:
Awww, a teddy! Hahahaha, nice diss, bear 
But I’ve felt more despair hanging out with this pear! (Hey!)
So zip it bout your stupid little saga only suiting little toddlers 
They should call it Dangan-romper (hahaha, drop it)
Ayo it’s AO, with the great flows straight from Dane Boe
On the kitchen sink, I’ll be spitting seeds cause I kill the beat, so just lay low
I’m packing more flavor than a bag of Cuties
You perv on kids worse than an ad for Cuties
Your case 3s are the only thing tragic, Koomy
Oh no, wear a mask for his magic cooties!
Your verse is an Ultimate Punishment but all your crushing’s the DJ’s hopes
Sitting and watching the mayhem but all that you’re maiming’s your VA’s throats 
Your little cubs should get ready to write your Mono-File
Cause now you’ll get a taste of my kitchen, orange nya nya style 
In rankings, you can barely make top ten (nya nya)
Like who cares what Enoshima’s loose sock says (nya nya)
Call it orange fever, I’m sick with a diss
So treat me like you and lick up my kids (nya nya)
All your plans to defeat hope, got crushed by a little Alter Ego
I guess it’s true what they say - never meet Chihiros (hahaha)

Kurokuma:
And they I say I talk too much, ha, let’s put this to rest!

Shirokuma:
Can’t stand the heat inside the kitchen? 

The Monokubs:
Then get burned like Celeste!

Monokuma:
Skrrrt
Comparing apple trees to oranges, it’s shocking how far you’ve fallen
But you can just ask Komaru - I’m balling
What happened to you, kiddo? I mean your view count “wazzup”
But your whole crew-
-Crew? Like Among Us? Hahahahaha
-just shut up!
I’ve had it with your insufferable rhymes
So let’s give it all we got, it’s punishment time
When it comes to the kitchen’s biggest weirdos, even Teruteru’s not as abhorrent
Because I’ve been torturing violent knife-equipped psychopaths like it’s just Clockwork, Orange
This ain’t a Jigsaw trap, talk back and it’ll cost you your life
So let me give you some pointers because I’m sharp as a KNIFE
I’ll take your Happy Appy Sausage Party brain destroying channel and I’ll have it canceled
Leave an orange strung up like Hiyoko, ripping my way through this midget asshole
So be glad that I’m putting an end to your shit, buster
I’ll be bombarding your carcass with bars like a body has been diss covered

Annoying Orange:
This is your lesson, huh? Then let me ask this
How’d an AI run by Junko go out of fashion
Today your Fangans are the only reason that people stick 
So treat your efforts like one of them - cease and desist
I left my mark on the internet, you’re a virus gone out of control
Better call you Liam the Leprechaun, cause you’re losing the gold  
I know your mastermind’s struggling to get it together
But hey, it wouldn’t be the first time she was crushed under pressure

Mixed by Freshy Kanal
Instrumental by Dansonn
Additional Instruments by Snakebite126
Kitchen Background by Fightmarker

The Annoying Orange vs Monokuma. Terrible Rap Battles of Comic Sans

I am the Trakked Man.
Freshy Kanal as The Russian Sleep Experiment
RNG and Quizzique as The Hat Man
Beat produced by InsaneBeatz
Written by Trakked
Additional help by nEon, Zagranis
Mixed and engineered by Freshy Kanal
Thumbnail by Trakked

Battle:
The Hat Man:
I am the hat man, and I dispense fear
I know you’re wondering now, “how did I get here?”
Well listen chap, this dapper rapper has a thing to say
Prepare to watch as your vision’s tainted, I bring decay
I am a con man, donning a hat and robe
You’re far gone, man, you’ve already shat your clothes
You’re dependent on some toxic gas to stay calm
And you’re looking like you went through twenty bombs with napalm
Trapped in a cell for fifteen days, tried to keep awake
And you seem insane from the chamber
You’re simply a weak display, it is bleak, just face 
It, can’t seek escape from the danger
Unfortunate your door is open to many mistakes
It’s as if you forced it open, and now it’s about to break
You should know, sir, you brought me in on your own terms
So when that door crumbles I’ll never give you closure.

Subject 1:
Am I what you fear in a man?
A hellish, cold vessel, a mere shell of a man?
One that always hears all the screams and tears of the damned?
I’m not scared of silhouettes, bring me to Hell if you can
(*laughter*) You couldn’t cage me, please! 
I’m seen as the demon of the KGB
If you want to try your hand at erasing me,
Then like me, grab onto my flesh and take a piece!
How sweet, you’re residing under childrens’ beds at night,
Frightened by a bit of light, while I’m the reason that they hide
And you’re looming over humans doing nothing
(*deep breath*) I rip the researchers to shreds and make the onlookers disgusted 
So if you want to try and pass some judgement, go and stuff it up
Your ugly mug, repugnant, and you’re nothing but 
A bug to me, so shut it, I will cut you up and flood this drug;
I've shrugged off thuds, cuts and blood, while you're only done when I pull the plug
Makes sense with the hat, now, you're dishing some caps out
Belongs in a crack house, causing drunkards to black out
I've had doubts, but I know myths are better off dead
So go off yourself now and GET OUT OF MY HEAD

The Hat Man:
Want me to keep cutting? It's not like you had a choice
You've already torn your vocal cords and shredded your voice
Was a traitor to the Soviets and put in constraints
I'm in minds across the world; the enemy of the mental state
The Hat Man leaves lands desolate. If you wanna mess with this,
I suggest you break your psyche twice and put an end to it
Then maybe you’ll see me in Hell
Reliving all your worst moments trapped inside a padded cell
Negative feelings are what I eat
Take a look at your film's ratings and I'm feasting for weeks
You have no room for debating when your blank one ain't unique
Your life is for my taking; now drift deep into sleep


Subject 1:
You can’t sedate me into silence, I am madness incarnate
The insanity lurking within humanity’s mind
You’re just hiding in the corner as if you were a target
Pure depravity causing calamities in the night
I’m so nearly free from hearing you speak again
Prepare to see me break the nocturnal haven in which you tread
And you may be known across the globe as a terrible bad sign,
Yet you can’t prevent your status dying, hear the flatline?

The Hat Man vs The Russian Sleep Experiment - Rap Cypher #30

Written, Recorded, and Thumbnail by JesseBox
Beat Arrangement, Mixing and Mastering by Freshy Kanal
Guitar Riffs by YuugenVinny

Special Thanks to Freshy Kanal, Yuugen Vinny, Snakebite126, Shimario, My Parents and The Bikini Bottom❤️


Jinx:
Aw a fellow blue haired bitch thinkin’ she wants some
Your “nakama” and “kumbaya” shit don’t work where I come from
Keep your fairy tails away from me, I’m not afraid to fucking rip your face off, I’m droppin bombs on top this creepy stalker

Like Pow! I’ve got an arsenal with weapons galore
Been on the roster for a decade and still the players want more!
Your tacky fanservice is almost cute, but terrible still
I liked you better as a rock girl, or when you had guts to kill 

I mean, c’mon, chick, you could’ve been so badass!
Instead your writers picked one gag and then played that trash for laughs
And I mean, no one even knows your dumb kid’s series anymore
Potential and relevance down the drain, need I say more?

Juvia: 
I’ll have you know that I am doing just fine
Cause I know how to aid my friends when their lives are on the line
You’re a reckless child, meddling while the task was being handled
Had you just been mature, Vi could’ve still had Vander

I’m an Ex Element four, was S class in Phantom Lord
I’ve the scars to prove my passion and agony I’ve endured
And my guild believed in me to change for good when I was wrong
Your family never had that trust, and thanks to you, they’re all gone

All your punches do is phase through me due to my water power
And I will not be shaken, I’m cool like rain that will shower
Except in Jinxes’ case, all it takes is words to confound her
Crush her like Mylo and Claggor and turn her back into Powder

Jinx:
*groans* That isn’t me, don’t call me that
I can feel all their pain, the monsters are coming back
I can’t take it any longer, your attacks, they’re much stronger
And I- *pfft*… haha.. HAHHAHAHAh

You can’t meet the damage I’ve done
You peaked during your season one
And what you call love is just an obsession that you manifested, and it’s fuckin’ scaring him off

He’s annoyed by you
And girl, the viewers feel the same too
Only Mashima’s shitty writing could’ve given you
A world where Gray even tolerates you!

Juvia:
What did you say?
About my Gray?
I’ll make you pray that you stayed in your lane or met an early grave like where your parents lay!
Don’t play with this rainwoman
I’m not afraid of a thieving rat with nothing to her name

Who do you think you are? You’re not the savior of Zaun
Cause all it takes is pink hair to take this failure off guard!
This poor pathetic schizophrenic should just quit while ahead
Thought she found her calling, then her THIRD father ended up dead

And by your hands no less. 
Just loss after loss and this one was bound to be next
Keep causing problems and problems are all that you’ll get
Past the point of help
I’d say that you were cursed but Vi said it better herself

Jinx vs. Juvia Lockser - Jesse’s Rap Battles

Boom Boom vs. Papyrus - Mario vs. Anything!


Snakebite126 As Papyrus 


RaccoonBroVA As Boom Boom


WAN As Kamek


Art by WAN


Mixed by Jort


Chiselled by Raisu Battle


Written by King Ducky


Research assistance from King Wallace & We Think company

Cover Art by Danger


Beat prod. Anywaywell & Glitchdude


Papyrus:

I'm known as the great Papyrus, not afraid to get straight to violence !!! 

Skeletons don't have brains inside us, yet you're the one who's insane and mindless !!!

Those limbs won't stay, they'll fly off! The way that you’re swaying exciting your arms when you charge,

Dizzily maiming and fighting with walls, makes sense that he's not invited to Mario Kart !!!


You're a disgrace of a brute, you grab your tongue have it taped to my shoe

This headache should be used to the taste of a boot! (Nyhehehehehee!)

This inane goof is way overused, devs are too lazy to make something new

So they stay with the same gameplay loop, and gamers stray away by playing a flute !!!


Because of this awesomest brawn that I got Undyne knows I've a shot at the Royal Guard !!! 

But my chances will not top all of the stomps you call “plots” that been foiled are

So better get Kamek for backup his magic will hand you the chance of 

Not napping in battle when you get all tired out madly attempting to land an attack on !!!


Boom Boom:

As those doors crashed open and ya began rattling off dad jokes

I can now understand why in Smash-Bros, only Sans shows

Ya stand so tall yet ya trapped in that fat jokes shadow

Must be tampering with ya eyes, you can't see past it like a lamp post!


And those puzzles put me to rest n’ yet I still get something from them lesser quests

If I put my foot up at your head ya eyes should be xs when I step on em! 

His schemes are literally a walk in the park, all would know that id drop him easy

Sans and you must be the rotting-up corpses of Wario and Waluigi! 


IIIIM BOOM BOOM BOOM B-BOOM B-BOOM BOOM Like how ya traps blow up in ya face!

THE HUGE NUKE OF THE KOOPA TROOP Meanwhiiiiile ya got nothing to say!

Skinny bones ain't no meaty opponent one shitty throw could leave him beat and broken

The utmost weakest joke in Snowdin holding pity votes as a means of coping!


Papyrus:

Pissed off? I would be too if I only exist cuz of a pit stop

Which rots at the center of worlds: This mid boss is a mid boss (Nyeh-heh-heh!)

Now comes my secret move which defeats a goon in 3 in tune hits

It would leave you confused and seeing stars but it seems you beat me to it !!! 


WHAT, These stupid dogs have ruined it all, including both you and this new sup one

Whos useless boss has been used so much, won't needa beat ya to know you fell off !!!

Your putrid plot is moving left and right, at best can fly, SANS, THE PESTICIDE !!!

He spent his life endlessly obsessed with guys who tend to best his efforts every time !!!  


Kamek:

Once upon a time a boneless sidekick had his hopes to fight and

Be Royal guard but was regarded as too barebones and kind

He thought humankind as slow n spineless cuz they had chosen violence 

But then Frisk came along…


Boom Boom:

Could say that they left ya open minded! (Kamek: OHHHHH!!!)


Gonna be honest ready? it's easy to know what pastas from your awful recipe

If one chomp and there's vomit on his top already then it's gotta be Paps spaghetti!

Ya blue hearts been botchin’ any shot it gets yet he still pretends to be all optimistic

So I'd call it fittin that you're the skeleton here your love lifes nonexistent!

Boom Boom vs. Papyrus - Mario vs. Anything!

Lyrics / Beat / Trivia: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1h6OcvFVeWh4NNBTc3uFJIyWyT9eOeyG59r7QRNtI2TI/edit?usp=sharing
Quizzique as Redd
Mancha as Spamton
Written by MetaMachine and GamingPlush64
Mixing by ENNWAY
Thumbnail by JK03
Beat by 2Deep
Hint for next battle: "Absented minded knuckleheads"

Spamton vs. Redd

grunkle stan gravity falls vs gps the nightly manor rap battle

Grunkle Stan vs. GPS - TEIMUNITY RAP BATTLES! (Ft. Titanium and nEon)

Hello everyone, I welcome you all to yet another Teimunity Rap Battles! Today combatants are none other than Gravity Falls favourite uncle: Grunkle Stan, going up against The Nightly Manor’s expert hacker: GPS! Who will win? Who will get robbed?Who’s swiping my wallet by the end of the battle? Um…yeah let’s hope this ends without me getting robbed

Titanium as Grunkle Stan
Neon as GPS

Written by Teimunity
Illustrations by Teimunity and Evry

Edited by Powerofdan

Mixed by SIR Rap Battles
Beat by Johny Tyson 2

Grunkle Stan vs. GPS • TEIMUNITY RAP BATTLES!

Cover art by: Cidisswo
YT link: https://youtu.be/SrpFrzgsdME?si=fGHuqH3SymB5l3so

egomanic as both voice
Written by egomanic

Lyrics: 

[The Max Headroom Hijacker]
(Yeah) try to catch the wave, and drown in my flow
Cuz mine is hard to swallow you’re a soft drink like coke
Why don’t you pass me a cigarette, im asking for smoke
Give a cowboy his magazine, this gat’ll unload, so
Mic pilot with the rhymes i'm freestyling 
Stacking my piles high in the sky, supplies rising 
Dropping by lines right on the fly like skydiving 
While you tried diving into the night and died trying 
Hijacked off in the cockpit since dishonorable discharge 
Till you dropped and the rocks hit, now you’re never gettin them off (Uh) 
We are not the same, i'm not on your plane
Inspired by the first 3d show host, while you got no game 
Mask on, not a trace while all the cops can spot your face
I’m on your case, going off unlike the bomb that's on your case 
Uh uh, sorry cooper but today is not your day
Come to get me i’ll just turn the other cheek and walk away

[D.B. Cooper]
I don't like funny stuff, but i have some notes
This is a rap battle, I expected actual jokes
Wanna talk about catching smoke?
I drop bombs, max, listen to the raps I wrote, it goes
Briefcase empty took 200k with me 
Got the job done, for 50 years remained missing
Placed whiskey orders, called the shots, escaped quickly
Stuck the landing and I even made it back for thanksgiving
You never left no evidence but it's evident
I made my mark, your love faded into irrelevance
Rebelled against PBS with your obscene scenes
But it seems, your messages are as obscured as your references (Ay!)
Ruffled some feathers then i flew the cooper
You broadcast fetish cosplay: D.B. Gooner
So go ahead and throw hands and get chucked like Swirsky
I kept mine clean while your gloves got dirty

[The Max Headroom Hijacker]
(Ohhhh)
I’m a rap god, bro think he the unabomber 😂
You bargain Bin Laden: Osama lama duma lama
You made some bank and then the banks became your treasury
So I’ll make this air pirate “see the X” because he’s dead to me

[D.B. Cooper]
(Ugh)
Your heads in the clouds if you think your verse phased me
First class? Nah, you dressed like the first lady
I cover my tracks well but this time the FBI will find
Your airtime is up, but you didn’t leave a tie behind…

D.B. Cooper vs Max Headroom Hijacker - Ego Rap Battles

This is the last time I do anything for that fuck shimario

BobcatXtreme as J. Jonah Jameson
TaigaTonic as Benson
Writing by Alchemyking
Additional help by JoJoVo
Art by Teimunity
Beat by kulture.
Mixing by Jort
Cover art by Kamren the Person
Special thanks: Matt Raichous, WoodenHornets, MetaStarVA, J.G. Quintel, & Shimario

JJJ:
HOFFMAN! Get this gumball machine out my office!
Against the Jameson, he can’t recoup his losses
Ego so big, your head is bigger than Pops’ is
But I’ll show you who the boss is!

Let me get my pen and print a headline:
“Jameson Hits Deadline, Makes Moron Choke Because His Bars Are Eggcelent!”
In comparison, he’s stretched more thin than the Spider-Menace’s webbing is
So I’ll put my two cents in, then dispense of him!

Think you’re some kind of master at handling your temperament?
It’s obvious that Benson flips the second that some slackers leave him upstaged
PARKER! Snap some pictures of his red face
Then you’ll get paid, and I’ll put it on the front page

Such a cowardly hothead, you’d prolly get some chicken wings to eat
And down it all with some Mississippi Queen
And then you steal employees’ lunch when they’re already tired?
Sit down, please. …You’re fired.

Benson
Mordecai, Rigby! Don’t slack on the beat
I know that you hate picking up trash from the scene
But you’ll get a raise if you make like the vigilante he seethes at
And kick this dirtbag from the streets!

It’s plain as day, the way you slave your place is brutal
It just takes whistleblowers to shut down the Daily Bugle
Think they’re making stacks, then you drop stacks of files on ‘em
With that mug, you look like you’d go “Sieg Heil!” on ‘em

You’re losing this bout
Cause this time, it’s the gum that’s chewing you out
Your seed in the Big Apple is rotten, I’d say it’s rather obvious
You stretch people’s hands in your offices like Doctor Octopus

You’re the real villain, keeping teens hobblin’
And withholding pay so Peter keeps jobbin’
Your profits only go to your nicotine hobby
Yet you ended up smoked by a different Green Goblin

JJJ
I’m not Susan, but don’t mind if I copy 
‘Cause your own mug ain’t even fit to hold my coffee!
Spent your past playing hockey games and hitting on drums
It fits you turned from a badass to a stick in the mud

That dome head won’t protect you, even if your residence blasted off
Either way, I’d still be sonning this astronaut
And speaking of domes, you went nuts when you were shut in
So you have no right to snap when people push your buttons

Benson
I’m used to irregular shows, but it’s out of the ordinary
How a man with no heart can still suffer a coronary
Maybe it’s ‘cause you added to Spider-Man’s foes in the ring?
Honest, the way you treated Scorpion stings

You got me pissed off, banking off of fear and pain
I’ll go ballistic on you, leave a smear campaign
You wanna say my mug’s ugly? Your plans were for nothing
‘Cause it’s abundantly clear your wife can’t handle a mugging

J. Jonah Jameson vs. Benson - AK Rap Battles

TheToppo as Spirit
Corncob as John 

Written by Teimunity

Illustrations by Nooby 
Thumbnail by ClarencetheDuck

Produced by Teimunity 
Mixed and Mastered by Danii

Special Thanks to: SPM, Buckethead, RaisuBattle

John (Minecraft) vs. Spirit (Roblox) • TEIMUNITY RAP BATTLES!

Watch the battle on YouTube: https://youtu.be/-AS7ppwvFvA

► CREDITS:

Theme Park Avenue as Slope Dude

Luke Reardon as The Abominable Snowman

Written by Theme Park Avenue

Slope Dude Art by Valonide

Abominable Snowman Art by BMB

Beat Prod. by Diamond Style

Mixed by Nikki

Thumbnail by LimJJ

Slope Dude Vs The Abominable Snowman. PowerPoint Rap Battles

Welcome back to Half-Ass Rap Battles! Today we have musical entities that cause stress to those who come across them; Mad Piano from Big Boo’s Haunt in Super Mario 64 versus Bop It, 90’s audio toy sensation. Enjoy!

TheMonarchy as Mad Piano
YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@TheMonarchyVA / https://www.youtube.com/@OliTheMonarchy / https://www.youtube.com/@monarchybattleraps
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/olithemonarchy
SoundCloud:
https://soundcloud.com/oli-the-monarchy

Eric the Audible as Bop It
YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@EricTheAudible
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/erictheaudible
SoundCloud:
https://soundcloud.com/central-rap-battles  

-LYRICS-

Mad Piano (0:09)
Yo! Looking for eight coins? There’s one to your left!
But it’s not the only thing I have covered in red
I’ll bop you ‘til you shatter! Make your circuitry bleed sparks
Plus you’ll find the key of my teeth… B#
See this chair? Sit down, take the polite road
Soprano C, you’re gonna scream out on a high note
I'm not settling, I demolish a score
I keep banging! And keep banging! And keep banging! And keep banging!
It’s like this Dizaster got me paying homage to Cort
See these coffins falling? Next thing you know, you’re falling in yours
On the topic of court; for being lame, you've stood accused
I'm not judging when these shelves start throwing books at you
Had a little fad and just kept extending that
It's like Simon Said "instead of memory, test their attention span"
Between the cash grabs and narrators so obnoxious
I got a command for you!... stop it.

Bop It (0:54)
Did I rattle your cage, dude? You’re Mad cuz I’m way smooth
Piano should stay tuned! I’m naturally playin’ you!
Wanting red? I’ll leave you spinning. You gotta be kidding
Thinking you’re the grand type... You’re more MIDI
You move so slow, I circle you with no running
If you hear boos around you, It’s not your ghost buddies
Haven’t you realized I’m twisted yet?
Fitnessgram shit; I'll make sure Suicide Drills in your head
You’re the least scary thing in your “sCaRy oLd hOuSe”
Walking wobbly like you hopped off the merry-go-round
Wait, yeah, you belong in that kinda room
There's been a remake and a port: this piano’s on loop (c’mon!)
More per minute, you’re getting b-b-beaten
You couldn’t hit me in Smash R-R-Remix
Save the jumpscare, you won’t pull it with me
After your little lullaby, I’m going to sleep!

-CREDITS-

Written, directed, and beat arranged by Commander Jacob
Mixed by GamingPlush64
Beat produced by 2Deep
Beat purchased by Fightmarker

Feedback by TheMonarchy, Fightmarker, Syroquise, and the spaceship
Shoutout to RacconBroVA, Dilly, TaigaTonic, Dani, Sculpture_, and the Smash Remix team

Thanks for listening
-ComJac

Bop It vs Mad Piano | Rap Battle (HARB)

TheMonarchy as Feathers McGraw 
ThanosQuack as Untitled Goose Game 
Mixed by Kaewoo 
CoverArt by WhozPhantom 
Beat by Requiem Beatz 
Art by Molliebendite & ACE
Special thanks to Grasman & GreenOwl 

Lyrics: 

McGraw: 
Feathers McGraw, most foul mind Britain’s seen 
Keeping up with the crimes as he now steals the scene 
From this inconspicuous ballbusting gander 
Out here stealing millions you just get bread from grandmas 


Ruffle feathers with McGraw soon you’ll be dead & gone 
I will only need my glove and then I’ll make a Chicken Run (and) 
I find it ironic who you bite off greater 
Cuz You only be a Goat in a Simulator 
(On guarde)

So I’ll beg my pardon as you’re decimated  
Verbally of course, rest we shall see later 
I’ve got some serious heat, that is the proof you lose 
So get down! Duck Duck Goose 

Untitled Goose Game: 
Oh snap! The nun turned out to be strapped 
But hasn’t considered the fact, nobody fucking asked! 
If all you you do is squawk then leave it to the ducks 
Keep the Blue Diamond I got bofa (bofa?) both-a-deez nuts 

“I’m ballbusting” yap yap yap yap 
Whatever bro just put the Beets in bag 
A thousand gnomes couldn’t cover your thousand yard stare
“I almost got the bag” dude NOBODY CARES 

So L +Ratio 
Stay trapped in the zoo while I wander every pond every patio
This penguin is crazy, bro thinks he Cobblepot 💀
Fitting for someone so deadpan to end bottled up 

McGraw :
Quiet you, we shan’t see what happens when I choose violence 
You should take notes from my playbook and embrace silence 
I’ll leave your burrow burrowed and ransack your House House 
You’ll go south out of season, this goose is cooked now 
 
A verbal murder, my first bird on bird crime 
This Goose couldn’t help, fell shorter than its play time 
I’m done stealing the battle, and while it was delightful 
Shows why I remain unrivaled and you’ll stay Untitled 


Untitled Goose Game: 
Oh you’re dangerous a criminal we get it 
But the best you got still is waaay too many edits 
I get hoes, I get bread, money and the Crown as well 
Switch it to the ring and that means I’ll hear no bell 

Cuz I stole it, now it’s in my burrow shining bright 
Like that smooth clay that will go extinct with the times 
Fits that a fly less bird doesn’t land but just crash and burn 
You’re left without your ice what happens when Penguins Turn (Honk!)

Feathers McGraw vs Untitled Goose Game- Rap Battle! ft. TheMonarchy & ThanosQuack

Cover Art by @TomPuffs

euphorxia as Guy Fawkes
Stofferex as The Joker
YDGeon as The Announcer

Lyrics Written by Pwner & Cidisswo

Audio & Beat Mixed by Cidisswo (Not Final)

CIDISSWO RAP BATTLES
GUY FAWKES
VERSUS
THE JOKER
BEGIN


Guy Fawkes:
En garde! Drop your weapons, Joker.
Your one and only purpose is to be mediocre.
Protested Protestants, now I live on through Anonymous.
You're the villain always thwarted by his lack of competence!
These days you're an incel icon. Your edgy humor's shock jock.
Guess one of your lines is "Guy Fawkes sucks guy cocks!"
I spit in your face with acid; it's like V for Vatman.
We know who wins between a masked man and this madman!
You'll be beaten like I'm Keaton against you, Jack Napier.
Try dumb rap games, you'll have One Bad Day with my rapier.
The Killing Joke comes when I murder a jester so hideous
And get the last laugh to ask, "Why so serious?"

Joker:
Jeez, the rap battle community thinks this loser could beat me?
No no, you complete me, and I keep fucking you up completely!
A pious man? You got notoriety from piety and devotion!
That's a fiery "We live in a society" moment!
My cronies crush your crew like the English crown.
Hanging with that crowd left you hanging in a crowd! By now,
Who wants to remember a dull holiday in November?
At least Thanksgiving has Black Friday and food with family members!
This jerk can't work a fire, now he gets fireworks.
To give the plot a better ending, smarter people should be hired first!
You fell to hell and once a year at night, England taunts your plight.
How does it feel to dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?

Guy Fawkes:
I went by John Johnson; your skin went Michael Jackson.
I'll whack a whackjob mob boss like the IRS on tax month.
You got a spermy face, Maybelline and snot-green hair.
You'd never live a normal life 'cause Gotham would just stop and stare!
And what's up with that Wonka suit? You really call that class?
That shit gives me a laughing fit harder than your laughing gas!
Destroying Joker over James was the best outcome to pan out.
As a film psycho, much like Barbara, you no longer stand out.

Joker:
You'll eat crow bars like a Red Robin Hood when BAM!
Even the bat version of Zorro gets outfoxed by my plans!
I fought flyers; you can't cockfight from a cut off penis!
Between Fawkes and I, Joaquin made me the better Phoenix!
When it comes to crime, the Clown Prince usurps your Parliament!
Striking fear into the king to hurt them more than Harley Quinn!
No one gives a fawk for this guy when failure's his legacy.
I'm always wanted, this time for arson from burning you like an effigy!


Outro:
WHO WON? 
WHO’S NEXT? 
YOU DECIDE

CIDISSWO RAP… 
*a grenade being thrown*
*the grenade explodes*
*Joker laughs*
uhh… RAP BATTLES

Guy Fawkes Vs The Joker - Cidisswo Rap Battles (Old Mix)

Jack Horner • Verse 1: (16 Bars)

Huh, when I heard the news, I thought they weren’t serious 
A whiny self entitled brat is the one that I’m dealing with?
Welp, doesn’t matter, you’ll be coping soon!
An object treating others like their objects will be perfect for my trophy room!

Honestly, kid, we aren’t so different, truth be told
Neglectful parents and CLEARLY the best ones on the show
And I do feel bad you had to go through that misgendering 
I don’t see why they’d censored when there’s nothing there for censoring!

(JACK!) What? I’ve been a menace! (HA!) What took so long, BITCH?! 
Boss (uh) Timing (Uh) I’ve been (UH) ON! (YUH)
I’m always coming better dressed, my reign of fits won’t stop
Don’t need your crocodile tears, with all this DRIP, I’VE, GOT!

(HA-HA!) I’M COOKING! And the pies aren’t even ready
Only times you’ve ever eat is when you chug roaches or jelly *retch?!*
*BARRFFF* Oughyeesh, can someone come and bag her awful face?
…Right, and the vomit too! Both of which are toxic waste! (AHAHAHA!)

Heather • Verse 1: (12 Bars)

(Ugh) You’re disgusting, but if you want to talk hard
I’m ready to annihilate the totem pole of Farquaad’s
I had to deal with nerds and geeks like you for fifty seasons
You’re weaker than Leshawna, I think I can take your beatings!

What’s with the slop you and your minions have been advertising? (EW.)
You somehow made it look like Chef’s food is more appetizing (Right)
I think I’ll pass, go stick your thumb in your-ACTUALLY!
He’s only making pies as he’s more lifeless than his factories!

I- Zip it, Beth (aww..) I thought I told you that I spit the best
I just thought you’d want his wig, it compliments your balding- AHHH!
(Ugh) She’s a troll…at least she can keep that secret
But what else is new? Another pussy left you beaten

Jack Horner • Verse 2: (8 Bars)

Now hold it, sis! (OOH!) I don’t know why you claim you’re even strong (YEAH!)
I beat the little bears, you got belittled by a blonde 
You let her talk down on you, but you’ll fight with Leshawna fine?
The only “drama” here is the island filled up with stereotypes

You aren’t fit for the role of villain, you amateur!
The insults you’ve batted at me are duller than Excalibur
At least I’m not as bad as Chris or the things that he thought up
The only prize he ever left you keep was “Total Trauma!” (OH YEAAAAAH!)

Heather • Verse 2: (8 Bars)

“Not as bad as Chris” Um, hello? Are you INSANE?!
You treat everyone around you like their pawns in some sick game that you created
Don’t you get why the both of you are so hated?
You can’t get your head out of the cloud because your ego’s so inflated!!!

I’m a queen! You’re beneath me! (CRAWL!)
I hope it shows that you drop dead when you look in that crystal ball
You’re an annoying selfish crybaby, go die in a ditch!
Now everybody knows that Jack is a B I T C- *poof!*

Well, that was weird.

(SCRAPPED DEMO) Jack Horner vs. Heather

WARNING: This battle contains substance reference, as well as strong profanity. Listen at your own risk.

Welcome back to MC Fawful Rap Battles! Today, two ADHD vs Autism mentalities clash, with the rapper famous for the Wednesday saga of albums, Chris Webby, against… The Autism Creature? Look I couldn’t think of anything better, I had another TBH matchup but it just didn’t feel right. Uhhh, who will win? Will Christian come out as the highest in the room (that’s his song right)? Will TBH wow the audience? That’s for you to decide!

CREDITS:

Zander as Chris Webby (audio)
Ego as Chris Webby (video)

Kurobane Azia as TBH

Written by MC Fawful
Beat by Clinstrumentals
Mixed by jort
Art by Evrywunzf8vrit
Cover-art by JotaSeis
Special thanks to PotFork

Alright, I think that’s it; stay tuned for the next installment of MC Fawful Rap Battles!

J. Jonah Jameson vs. Benson - AK Rap Battles

AshleyMagica

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