We discuss our personal paths to non-duality. We are all raised to think from a dualistic, black-or-white perspective, but inevitably our experiences lead us to a place where that type of thinking no longer works. We must find something larger that helps us interpret our experience and the world around us with a different mind.

47 - The Path to Non-Duality

We discuss our belief systems' role giving structure to our morality and ability to know what is true. These are structures that are helpful for a time and then it is helpful for our spirituality to move beyond them, into a non-dual way of knowing and experiencing God and reality.

48 - The Path to Non-Duality 2 - Beyond Morality and Right Belief

Religion puts forth right belief and right action (morality). If we stay in a dualistic mindset, it will not allow us to explore and know reality and ourselves deeply. We can have practices which allow us to take in what is, and give us better ability to have freedom in shaping behavior.

49: Non-Dual Perceiving and Becoming

Effective teachers are guides which help us find our way to truth, not just dispensing "answers." And when we suspend judgment of everything we do and think, we can experience our inner reality as it is and move toward healing and shaping it.

50 - Non-Dual Experiencing

There are layers to our human experience – perception, thought, emotion and sensation. It is important to pay attention and understand what is happening at each of these levels, but they, in and of themselves, are not the fullest or deepest experience of existence. There is a deeper sense with which we can connect – “underneath” all these layers. There are different ways to access it and different things to call it, but our spiritual practices will lead us to the same place.

51 - A Deeper Sense

In his book In An Unspoken Voice, Peter A. Levine identifies four portals to spiritual awakening, as in the Buddhist and Taoist traditions. They are death, mediation, sex and trauma. In these experiences, humans experience profound surrender, and our nervous systems, which normally seek safety and control, are overwhelmed. Perhaps we can practice this type of surrender as a way of life.

52 - Portals to Spiritual Awakening

Trauma theory is helpful in understanding how our nervous systems respond in stressful situations. We can also learn to navigate the different levels of nervous system activation, even when dangerous and life-threatening events occur. We tend to avoid these difficult things in our lives because we do not believe in our ability to experience intense sensations or understand how to complete the circles of activation and deactivation that occur naturally within us. It is in these intense activations that we can experience surrender, reckoning with our own death and spiritual awakening.

53 - Trauma As A Portal

We’re another year older and have become more focused on our collective experience of stress and trauma. All of us experience difficulty which has an effect on our bodies over time, even as we are unaware. De-pathologizing our adaptive responses to difficulty and setting ourselves free from blame are the first steps to getting to healing. Healing is becoming connected again with ourselves and others. The book referenced is The Myth of Normal by Gabor Maté.

54 - The Cumulative Effects of Stress and Setting Yourself Free to Heal

As organisms (bodies), we respond to our environment automatically without conscious awareness. The ways we do this make up various parts of our experience as humans and even form elements of what we think of as our personalities. We tend to think of these responses as “problems,” but there is no reason to pathologize or judge these adaptations that are useful in helping us survive and regulate ourselves. We need to become present to them and take a neutral stance to understanding the way our organisms organize themselves in our environment. Just notice the ways you have adapted.

55 - We Are Who We Are in Response to Our Environment

Silence/contemplation/meditation are paths to healing. Our organisms (bodies) are usually bent on helping us avoid difficulty and keep us feeling “put together” in our environment. If we become “meta” to ourselves and the responses, then we have opportunity to encounter ourselves and things we have been avoiding and make some shifts in our responses. We need to feel safe and connected to do that.

Episode 56 - Therapy as A Collective Meditative Experience

We are used to needing to push forward and produce or “work on” things, even in therapy. Healing, however, occurs when we become passive. It is something we receive, rather than being something we make happen. In order to become passive, we have to feel a sense of safety.

Episode 57 - Passivity As A Means to Healing

We all search for context to help us find meaning in our circumstances. The largest context that exists is consciousness itself. We are all a part of it and it is that from which we came. If we go back and connect with this largest context which we can call "being-ness," then we can have a better understanding of our existence. And we can focus on "just being" in the being-ness. This helps us diminish the role of our ego (aka "small self"), having less thoughts of ourselves and achieving a simpler existence focused on a larger meaning.

1 - The Larger Context of Which We Are A Part

More about the "small self" (or ego) and how we can take a proper stance toward it to shed layers and become our fullest selves, connecting with the "large self," where we find connection and wholeness.

2 - Small Self, Large Self

The discussion of grief continues. This episode is about connecting with the Larger Presence through our grief. There is something larger than just the attainment of our desires or being guided by our ego’s agenda. Also, we would love to have your feedback and questions here or on facebook at facebook.com/asingletree!

6 - The Role of Our Grief 2: Connecting Us to the Larger Self

People's ability to be resilient despite their loss and pain is amazing. How do we continue to move forward and want anything when we are constantly experiencing grief? We are grateful for your input and questions. They help us shape this discussion and make it richer!

7 - Resilience: Holding Desire Despite Our Grief

We have a tendency to analyze and categorize our experiences - of ourselves, others and the world around us. This is a necessary function our brains have, but if we are constantly approaching our life just dividing what we see into "good" and "bad," or other categories, we limit our experience. Non-dualistic thinking is about receiving and encountering the whole of our experience - the "good" and the "bad." This helps us be more present and have more robust and cohesive experiences.

We are grateful for your input and questions here and on facebook. They help us shape this discussion and make it much richer!

8 - Non-Dualistic Thinking 1: Receiving the Whole of Our Experience

We naturally judge ourselves and others based on the small self's desire to be valuable, and create safety and control. The goal is that we would be able to suspend our constant judgments of ourselves, others and the world and accept ourselves and others, even in our "mistakes."

9 - Non-Dualistic Thinking 2: Accepting Ourselves and Others

In order to continue expanding our consciousness, we must have an abiding trust in existence itself. Amazingly, we can assimilate even the most difficult of circumstances into a resilient narrative. Life is there to shape us by transforming our "programming" so we can connect with the Largest Self or being-ness and become more flexible and complex beings. Thanks for listening!

11 - The Evolution/Development of The Self 2: Abiding Trust in Existence

From the time we are born, we are shaped by our experiences. We develop our sense of self based on feedback we get from our environment and inevitably end up with some rigid "programming," which we believe defines who we are. The goal is that we become aware of this programming and develop more flexibility in how we see ourselves. Thanks for listening!

12 - Our Self-Protective Programming: Developing A Flexible Sense of Self

We all contain paradoxes within ourselves. As well, we encounter paradox in others and the world around us. These seemingly contradictory propositions create tension and ambivalence, but if can “hold the tension" and travel through them, we can find beauty, growth and creativity. Thanks for listening!

13 - Beholding Paradox: Growth Through Unknowing

Bringing about the "life energy" in our own and others’ lives seems to be one of the irreducible phenomena that gives our lives a sense of meaning. We contribute to growth and creativity which transcend the things we can see and touch. We all have access to this life energy in our will to live and keep moving forward in hope. We are glad to be with you on this journey!

26 - Tapping Into The Life Energy

Therapist Jenny Helms joins us for a conversation about shame and shame resilience, ideas taken from author Brené Brown. Jenny specializes in treating eating disorders and has significant experience working with females (and males) struggling with eating issues, body image issues and shame. She shares part of her own powerful journey from which she draws courage to inspire and walk alongside others.

29 - Shame, Resilience And Our Bodies With Jenny Helms

Therapist Whitney Mosier joins us to talk about sex and intimacy. Instead of seeing sex as just a way to get our desires fulfilled, we can see the sexual relationship as an opportunity for growth and healing. Our sexual relationships illuminate insecurities which can be addressed and worked through in safe relationships when we practice vulnerability, opening deepening levels of intimacy.

32 - Sex And Intimacy In Couple Relationships With Whitney Mosier

Registered Dietitian Nutritionist Amber Girrens joins us for a discussion about healthy eating and how our nutrition and physical health affect our mental and emotional well-being. We all know we need to make healthy and balanced choices when eating, but it’s difficult to know where to start. There’s a lot of misleading and confusing information out there. Amber is here to help!

34 - Nutrition And Mental Health With Amber Girrens

We seek to avoid that which resembles death: pain, trauma and the darkness within us. Our nervous systems alarm us of what seems dangerous, but our bodies are built to move us through potentially traumatic events adaptively. Life is full of mixed experiences: life and death are happening at once. We can accept them both.

37 - Life and Death: Navigating Potentially Traumatic Experiences

We are in solidarity with those affected by violence and those who live in fear because of it. Many of us are experiencing tension after violence toward people of color and ensuing riots. In this episode, we discuss ways to respond to tension and the threats we experience in order to establish complex responses which can lead to peace and reconciliation.

39 - Developing Complex Responses to Fear in Racial Tensions

It is easy to see increasing polarization in our culture about racial tensions and other issues. Our first response to these social issues tends to be taking one side or the other. The rhetoric in our culture is tense and lends itself to rigid stances and power-grabbing. We must examine our own nervous system responses to find within ourselves the ability to speak and act from a truly powerful place. Real power tends to be based in trust and vulnerability.

40 - Embracing Real Power to Speak to Those Different from You

We tend to look at others and focus on ways they can change, rather than practicing vulnerability, which can help us experience transformation. Transforming ourselves will help us be part of change, and also help us practice non-violence. Being able to engage in vulnerability makes us more powerful because we become unflappable in the face of threat.

41 - Vulnerability and Non-Violence as Modes of Transformation

Conversations are grinding to a halt and relationships are strained due to the current political gridlock. To develop a dialogue that will help move us forward, we must seek to understand the deeply held values in ourselves and others. We must also seek to hold two seemingly irreconcilable things in tension with one another to get to something new. We invite your feedback, and hope you will help us move this discussion forward.

42 - Developing A Dialogue in Gridlock

There are two seemingly opposing forces at work in all living organisms: the drive to change and the drive to stay the same. The conservative/progressive divide in our culture indicates this dynamic is at work intensely right now. We must continue to talk to one another, believe change is possible and practice awareness of these seemingly opposing forces. Healthy growth happens through providing the necessary conditions and building to the point where insight and learning takes place.

43 – Preservation and Progress: Nurturing Healthy Growth and Change

Growth as human beings means expanding our container to let in more and more reality. We often don’t engage in this type of work because it means we will leave behind comfort, safety and others who are like-minded, but expanding consciousness doesn’t mean we are better than others or that we cannot continue to agree and hold space for others’ views. In fact, it means the opposite: we have more space for good, bad and different.

ayers Of Us

44 - Expanding Consciousness: Letting in Reality

We often want to define ourselves and set ourselves apart from others by identifying ourselves with a category or group and by being the heroes in our own stories. We also seek to establish a sense of comfort and stability at all costs. Life comes along and hands us interruptions, irritants and inconveniences that seemingly throw us off course, but perhaps those things that don’t seem to fit can be incorporated into an inclusive whole.

45 - Hold Your Identity Loosely

Mental health professionals Brandon Jacobs and Joel Ybarra of Real Life Counseling discuss consciousness, contemplation and growth. Find out more about Real Life Counseling at RLCwichita.com.

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