Stuff I listen to on a daily basis.

I love you all! please go check out Lux and Guardin!!
@lux_45
@guardinmusic

LYRICS-

Yung van:
Call me back I need you right now
On the ground as the rain pours down
Where'd you go when i needed you 
Where'd you go when I needed you
Call me back as the rain pours down
On the ground I need you right now 
Where'd you go when I needed you
Where'd you go when I needed you 
I called you but I can't speak
But I can hear you breathing
I'm wide awake cause I can't sleep
and I can only think of you

guardin:
think too much, i'm so lost, where my head go?
 trippin' now, blankin' out to the echo
all i fears finally here, movin' mad slow 
pacing now, trace your frown when i let go 
falling back into the depths of my own mind
 i'd be lying to you baby if i said that i was fine 
i've been rearranging furniture & finding stuff inside 
like the crystals in my pockets that you probably left behind 
i don't wanna be without you 
baby i am not okay without you

FOLLOW MY MAN LUX!!!

you were my best friend w/ guardin (Prod. Lux45)

funny back story on this song  i was gonna make a joke song on this youtube beat for dying in the cut but then it became serious smh lol


lyrics:

you can call me courage cause i’ve been so cowardly 
i can tell you i let you down, mom ain’t proud of me 
son dropped out of school, man what a tragedy 
sorry i couldn’t be all the things you want me to be 
but it’s alright 
yeah it’s okay 
with my bros now getting paid 

i’ll be your stupid fuck up baby 
how can you not hate me?
you know your son is crazy?
i guess you still see something 
i guess i don’t see nothing

sorry mom, i love you lol w/ demxntia

sample: gert taberner - fallen 
https://soundcloud.com/gerttabernermusic

Instagram

you don't love me anymore

SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/track/3JTplTrD1gTPE1CCy3Uxqx?si=B3ZOVsUIQwW9Pq7iH1Ve2w

BANDCAMP: https://collidingwithmars.bandcamp.com/track/foxgloves-w-bluknight

dedicated to you

produced and composed by @bbluknight & colliding with mars
mixed by colliding with mars & @lilpolearm
mastered by @lilpolearm
additional vocal engineering by @leorinda
lyrics and artwork by colliding with mars

lyrics:

[verse]
all these songs are a mystery to me 
I’m just tryna let it be 
I’m just tryna let it be, yeah
when she said I don’t have the energy 
I’m just tryna let her be
and let nothing come between us


[pre-chorus]
she said 
that she hurts herself and she wanna be somebody else
she said 
that she hates herself and she wants to be somebody else


[chorus]
should’ve said I don’t have the time 
out of sight and I’m out of mind
come around during wintertime 
doo doo doo haha i said doo doo


should’ve said I don’t have the time 
out of sight and I’m out of mind
come around during wintertime
doo doo haha i said doo doo lmao so wacky

[verse]

[bridge]
baby it’s cold outside
you can’t say that I didn’t try
you make me feel so odd
like foxgloves in the wintertime

[chorus]

Foxgloves (w/ bluknight)

I'm face down, won't you pull me from the bottom
I always got something I can't explain
So for a second I will turn away
Try to figure out what's inside of my brain
That's been eating me away
I got ten ice packs for the bruises I got every day
For the last few years and the last few months I been so so
So alone so alone Just walking through these empty worlds
You see me in your photographs but thats not me no more

So tell me you'll look for me And I promise I will look for you
Yea you say there's a place for me, But you're lying when I dream of you

So spare me a moment, Just to feel my heart beating
I've been waiting forever just to drown in this feeling
I don't wanna cry, Feel like everybody's watching me
Trippin like this as if anybody knows of me
Ima keep it cool when i'm chillin next to somebody
Feelin like a nobody I'm living like a nobody

So spare me a moment, Just to feel my heart beating
I've been waiting forever just to drown in this feeling
Is it too good to be true let me know now
Ima give it up real quick for the show now
Are you wishing for me?
Don't you wanna be free?

Yea i'm face down I been holding on for too long
Been killin myself everynight for another song
What's even for I do all of this just to make it through
I don't even care who's watching Ima do the shit I do

I got so much love so much love yea all around the world
But i'm still such a nobody, But I still got somebody
To make me feel something I guess that's all I ever needed

So spare me a moment, Just to feel my heart beating
I've been waiting forever just to drown in this feeling
I don't wanna cry, Feel like everybody's watching me
Trippin like this as if anybody knows of me
Ima keep it cool when i'm chillin next to somebody
Feelin like a nobody I'm living like a nobody

So spare me a moment, Just to feel my heart beating
I've been waiting forever just to drown in this feeling

Like A Nobody (Prod. Otvaje)

dedicated to you

written + performed by colliding with mars
produced by colliding with mars
mixed + mastered by polearm
additional vocal engineering by leorinda
cover art by colliding with mars + adrelix

lyrics:

I could never hurt you
So I’ll keep your name a secret
But I’m cursing under my breath
Cause I know I blew my chances
Not like it could ever work out
But the thought of it seems so nice
And I miss the times that we spent
Staring at the stars above my bed
The thoughts of you are fleeting
But all the same are swarming my head
I don’t want to be a burden
I just want you here in my bed

All the time we shared
All the time we shared

And even though you aren’t dying
I’ll carry a piece of you with me forever
But for now we’re just two lions in the rain
Waiting for the summer to close out

two lions in the rain

another ceiling i don't recognize
another feeling and i'm petrified
i've been flying out just to stay inside
i never listen to my own advice, no

what the hell have i been doing?
makin up excuses, i don't wanna do this
so what the hell have i been doing?
i been stuck inside a room with
way too much to lose

but it's worse at night
something's gotta give
i don't wanna die but
i don't wanna live
it gets worse at night
something's gotta give
i don't wanna die but
i don't wanna live

tryna be strong is my weakness
what's a life with no meaning?
help me get rid of this feeling
i'm not alive i'm just breathing

no, oh
don't go
no, oh
i'm alone

something's gotta give

LISTEN ON SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/album/59CywC3libzFJgQYO33do5?si=Mdfv-LICRJi2IahZ0dof3g

ALL TRACKS WRITTEN, RECORDED, PRODUCED, COMPOSED, AND PERFORMED BY COLLIDING WITH MARS EXCEPT TRACK 1 PRODUCED BY COLLIDING WITH MARS + OCOENIA AND TRACK 2 WRITTEN AND RECORDED BY COLLIDING WITH MARS, DEMXNTIA AND FATS’E

ORIGINAL ARTWORK BY ADRELIX AND COLLIDING WITH MARS

MIXED AND MASTERED BY POLEARM
ADDITIONAL VOCAL ENGINEERING BY LEORINDA

DEDICATED TO YOU

COLLIDING WITH MARS IS CHRISTIAN JAMES + GOLD

SANDGEM TOWN

S/O https://soundcloud.com/93feetofsmoke 4 the beat
S/O https://soundcloud.com/demxntia 4 mixing 
S/O my bf 4 helpin wit da cover txt :,)
LOVE YALL THX SOOO MUCH 4 LISTENING!!!
LYRICS:
Tension! Tension! Is building in my heart again
Chemical inside my brain are constantly calling it off
Feelings get a hold of me and I say things that I don't mean but hey
There's no such thing as perfect in reality
~I don't wanna go back so baby let me take my time
I don't wanna see your face or hear your voice don't hit my line
And ima do what i wanna do from now on
Sit back in my car with the music up loud
And i don't care if you're proud of me or watching me
~Cuz i've been up all night startin fights with my thoughts again
Tell me where it ends, oh my god, Here I go again

Tension's all that i've known and I won't let go
Cuz i'm alive, All day and night
Tension's all that i've got so I just can't stop
Cuz i'm alive, All day and night
Darlin' why am I fallin for you again?
Found you deep in my heart, where you've always been
Even if i'm cryin I can keep on dancin to the beat of my heart
With the tension in my head

Tension! Tension! Is building in my heart again,
I think I should let you go cuz maybe it's just for the best
But you go and pull me right back
I don't wanna have to fight this again
I'm stuck cuz I can't go without a happy ending
~I am better off on my own, but I don't wanna live without your soul

And ima do what i wanna do from now on
Sit back in my car with the music up loud
And i don't care if you're proud of me or watching me
~Cuz i've been up all night startin fights with my thoughts again
Tell me where it ends, oh my god, Here I go again

Tension's all that i've known and I won't let go
Cuz i'm alive, All day and night
Tension's all that i've got so I just can't stop
Cuz i'm alive, All day and night
Darlin' why am I fallin for you again?
Found you deep in my heart, where you've always been
Even if i'm cryin I can keep on dancin to the beat of my heart
With the tension in my head x2

SPOTIFY

TENSION! (PROD. 93FEETOFSMOKE)

I want to get better but I don't know what the fuck to do...

Written by: @itsyungvan
Mix/Master: @sinxi
Production: @youngburial
art by: @digitalyams

Lyrics-
I’m standing on this road alone
it’s impossible to feel anything when you don’t know how to cope
No, I don’t want to let you in
If I let you peek inside I’m afraid I’ve let them win 
I’ll never let them win
I’ll never let them win
Oh now I’m wasting my time, wasting my time with you
I don’t know how to tell you but I, don’t wanna be friends with you 
I’m living a lie, I’m living my life in blue 
I want to get better but I, don’t know what the fuck to do
So I write down all my wrongs and I burn them
I’ve done people wrong, yeah I’ve hurt them
That’s why I can’t let you be my friend
I’m afraid that I’ll hurt you again
So I write down all my wrongs and I burn them
I’ve done people wrong, yeah I’ve hurt them
That’s why I can’t let you be my friend
I’m so scared that I’ll hurt you again
I’m embarrassed 
I’m ashamed
I’ll never heal if I never admit that I have this pain x4

how to cope

how to cope (Prod. Fats'e youngburial)

OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO HERE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pbnrnTJpvB0

shoutouts 2 @kaiyko as always!!

let me have a minute to get
my head on straight
i really haven’t been myself
for almost 28 days and i think
what a bummer could November really be?
i think there’s something that my eyes can’t see
cuz lately i’ve been getting so upset
with almost everything 

i don’t wanna be a villain
in this story of mine (neither do you)
i don’t wanna be a perfect person
that’s just a lie
but you keep taking all the words that
keep falling out my mouth
i don’t think you see what my
problem is even all about

oh, what a lie 
that we live
it’s alright to be 
alone sometimes
what a life 
that we’re given
it’s alright to to be 
alone sometimes

efforts wasted
and so am i tonight
feelings faded
like everything in my life
different faces
i’d rather stay inside
been gone for ages
so why’d you stay tonight?

i don’t wanna miss you
i don’t wanna need you
i don’t wanna feel like
i’m nothing without you
i don’t wanna miss you
i don’t wanna need you
i just can’t pretend
that i’m perfect without you

oh, what a lie 
that we live
it’s alright to be 
alone sometimes
what a life 
that we’re given
it’s alright to to be 
alone sometimes

and i don’t wanna
live a life where
i’m feeling sorry
so baby take all
my mistakes
and blame it all on me
cuz i’m not you and
you’re not me
so we can just 
call this a tragedy
but then i’d be
lying once again

it's alright w/ kaiyko [MUSIC VIDEO IN DESCRIPTION]

PRODUCTION//MIXING
@demxntia

VOCALS//BY
@demxntia
@sinxi
@twotwntytwo
@sushisai

WHEN I'M ALONE

i just wanna brighten up your day
i just wanna make ur clouds go away
help u see the sun on the other side
wipe away the rain drops from ur eyes

i can see the pain inside ur eyes
u can see the void inside of mine
baby can you tell me what’s on ur mind
happiness is hiding behind the lies

my intentions never show too well i know
i always feel i gotta fix it on my own
i try my best to end the vicious cycle
it’s not enough i’m in denial 

i just wanna brighten up your day
i just wanna make ur clouds go away
help u see the sun on the other side
wipe away the rain drops from ur eyes
i don’t ever mean to make u cry
i just wanna know how u feel inside
if im overthinking i apologize
wanna be the best for u and i

raindrops

You pick me up to tear me down
I hate myself when you’re around
I’m such a clown, but I still need you now

Cloak of shadows in the night
Stay with me, I’ll make it right
There’s nothing left inside

Don’t tell me that you think I’m fine
I swear I fucking hate that lie
At times I know I’m not alright, so don’t you even try

Frigid bones are shaken cold
A little kid, a tortured soul
A heart of gold

It’s time we said goodbye
Don’t try and change my mind
Gone down a thousand times

Take me far from here
In your atmosphere
Cause I, will try, every night, so

Whittled curves
Can shape the lines
But every time it’s just so damn hard to find, I notice every night

A fallen torch of leaking dread
No one else to hold instead
Something just so hard to bend
Up until the very end

youtube

frigid bones (prod. pacific)

thank you to the people that continue to support me u guys r everything<3
produced by curtains & mixed by demxntia 
lyrics:
find me fallin out of time
catch me loosing my mind
every single damn time you
go on call me out call me call me call me out
cmon tell me that im doing everything all wrong
and that i got a couple things i gotta work on
I gotta work on, damn i gotta work on
show me show me how i should to turn my whole world around
the only only unreasonable person right now
is me me me don't try to slip out of the line
and reap reap reap what i sow so i cant cry at all

and i dont wanna think about the other side
and what its like and the feelings that i gotta hide
cuz i dont wanna be the answer i dont have the answer
but you should know by now that you're my everything
i lost my heart in the open i wanted to show you but it's too late
cuz i been waiting on so you long
idk what is wrong with the future
but im seeing clearer
over and over watch me do this over
thought im feelin better but i haven't found the right cure
and now its been a really really really long time
since i been feelin like myself and i can finally shine
through the dark days it feels like its forever
don't know what i should say when i cannot remember
why i need you by my side
and all the reasons why i gotta get up and try but i know you'l....

find me fallin out of time
catch me loosing my mind
every single damn time you
go on call me out call me call me call me out
cmon tell me that im doing everything all wrong
and that i got a couple things i gotta work on
I gotta work on, damn i gotta work on
show me show me how i should to turn my whole world around
the only only unreasonable person right now
is me me me don't try to slip out of the line
and reap reap reap what i sow so i cant cry at all

CALL ME OUT(PROD. CURTAINS)

Thank you all so much for listening, I hope you enjoy this one!! Stay safe out there, please stay home and sprea love! Love you all <3

produced by: @user-597676997
Mixed by: @itsyungvan

Lyrics:
In my heart I know it's true
I'll be nothing without you
In my head I feel the same
So why do I feel the blame?

(Audio Clip)

If I let you in then you won't want to stay
I'm ashamed of everyone I ever date
It's not your fault I just don't know how to relate
If I run now then maybe your heart won't break
If I let you in then you won't want to stay
if you tell me you love me I'll run away
It's not your fault I'm just afraid of what's to come
I'm scared of love so I think it's better to run

In my heart I know it's true
I'll be nothing without you
In my head I feel the same
So why do I feel the blame?

If I let you in then you won't want to stay
I'm ashamed of everyone I ever date
It's not your fault I just don't know how to relate
If I run now then maybe your heart won't break
If I let you in then you won't want to stay
if you tell me you love me I'll run away
It's not your fault I'm just afraid of what's to come
I'm scared of love so I think it's better to run

If I Let You In, Then You Won't Want to Stay

if i let you in, then you won't want to stay (Prod. CapsCtrl)

tell me u need me w/ supachefm

Pure

Pure (prod. Crcl)

PROD. @demxntia
ART BY OCHA (old pic made for me but i made the background black)

[LYRICS]:+

All yall,
Photo perfect person take your notes on how im dressing,
I just want some top,
At the top you know im flexing,
Devil in my aura but so godly in my blessings,
Godly in my blessings but so human in my lessons,

Gotta fall first man just to learn a lesson,
Talk a lot a shit,
Woah my chopper teaching lessons,
Selling me a feat?,
Then get up out my mentions,
You may get more plays,
But I body what you sending,
Had a tough year,
Ain't no time to morn my losses,
Got no twitter friends,
Music niggas like to gossip,
All i want is money man I'm tryna be my posh shit,
When I die my bitches quote my tweets with oh my goshes,

All yall,
Photo perfect person take your notes on how I'm dressing,
I just want some top,
At the top you know I'm flexing,
Devil in my aura but so godly in my blessings,
Godly in my blessings but so human in my lessons,
All yall,
Photo perfect person take your notes on how I'm dressing,
I just want some top,
At the top you know I'm flexing,
Devil in my aura but so godly in my blessings,
Godly in my blessings but so human in my lessons,

Wait a minute lemme get somethings off of my chest bitch,
Crazy how my father wasn't there to ever teach shit,
learned all on my own end up like him that's some dumb shit,
Cycles man i aimed for better end up level capping,
Pray I make it through the year so then I overlap em,
I don't try with bitches all the same girls different maskings,
Maybe its my fault who cares hoe I ain't really asking,
You ain't gonna shine if you ain't got some kind of darkness,

All yall,
Photo perfect person take your notes on how im dressing,
I just want some top,
At the top you know im flexin,
Devil in my aura but so godly in my blessings,
Godly in my blessings but so human in my lessons,
All yall,
Photo perfect person take your notes on how im dressing,
I just want some top,
At the top you know im flexin,
Devil in my aura but so godly in my blessings,
Godly in my blessings but so human in my lessons.

GEHRMAN - LESSONS「PROD. DEMXNTIA」

Produced by T8 !!!!
Lyrics:
Why should I care about what u said what she said
I don't even know why it's messin wit my head but

It's kinda funny, it's kinda funny don't u think?
The way u see me
Like ima perfect walkin dream
Wish I could see you
The way you see me in your head
So picture perfect
But I just wanna be dead

I got it on my own for awhile
Until I felt sad again
I just wanna see the end
Cuz everyone is useless
When you're on your own
Ain't it funny that it feels like my best friend is my phone.

And I, I'm running out I'm running out baby
I'm running out of ideas on how to sink or swim in this situation
Was it my fault everything's complicated
But you can't take the blame
Can't take care of everything
You say it's a waste
To throw away just everything
But maybe you're the right one
And I am the wrong one for this time.

And I, I'm running out I'm running out baby
I'm running out of ideas on how to sink or swim in this situation
Was it my fault everything's complicated
It's kinda funny, it's kinda funny don't u think?
The way u see me
Like ima perfect walkin dream
Wish I could see you
The way you see me in your head
So picture perfect
But I just wanna be dead
I got it on my own for awhile
Until I felt sad again
I just wanna see the end
Cuz everything is useless
When you're on your own
Ain't it funny that it feels like my best friend is my phone.

And I, I'm running out I'm running out baby
I'm running out of ideas on how to sink or swim in this situation
Is it my fault everything's complicated
But you can't take the blame
Can't take care of everything
You say it's a waste
To throw away just everything
Maybe you're the right one
And I am the wrong one for this time.

Why should I care about what u said what she said
I don't even know why it's messin wit my head but
It's kinda funny, it's kinda funny don't u think?
The way u see me
Like ima perfect walkin dream

Stuff I listen to on a daily basis.

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