then man cast god in his own image,
and he's still monster making,
but none so beautiful as you,
you set the woodwinds aching,

oh no...not again,
imaginary friend,
 to stab my open sores,

I'm not so hot,
Canterbury snot, 
of aching apple cores,

c'mon..take a bite!

then the witch cast a shadow over me,
form of an octo-pussy,
and all my salt water to sea,
and all my white magic failed me,
so I went on a date with Circe,

oh no...not again,
imaginary friend to stab my open sores,
I'm not so hot,
Canterbury snot, 
of aching apple cores,

A date with Circe

Lonesome...
and longitude...

the penis sheath of Milarepa...

and her songs sound like melting snow,
 and flowers shying into colorings,

or moonlight reflecting on a dew speckled web,
or a burble of brook bidding flow unto ebb,

I'll stay here forever!

wanderlust strained through an absence of time,
time I was yours,
time I was mime,

PLEASE fall in love with the empty gestures,
I don't know what else to do,

 on a warm day, 
snow falls to melt away...

so I wear the penis sheath of Milarepa,
so I wear the penis sheath of Milarepa,

and nothing else...

and I pray to a pure land,
to show me the path,
but they took me with sure hand,
and then with a laugh,
showed me the void,
twixt my lust wrath and wrong,
so I'm headed for nowhere,
want to come along?

I'm melting!
II''mm mmeellttiinngg!!
III'''mmm mmmeeellltttiiinnnggg!!!
IIII''''mmmm mmmmeeeellllttttiiiinnnngggg!!!!

The Penis Sheath Of Milarepa

fill in the blank,
what more could I do,
fill in the blank,
you know I'd be true,

a stolen finder's fee, 
that binds me like a fetter,
and it's something I just cannot escape,

a hole inside of me,
and it's not gettin' better,
widens in a grotesquery gape,

in the sour milk light of mourning dawn,
she's gone...again,
and it never was a question of if,
it's a question of when,
it's a question of when I'll be cunted again,

fucked that is,

fill in the blank,
forgiven again,
fill in the blank,
loss will measure gain,

of words once written ,
 back when I was smite and smitten,
now I just don't feel that way anymore,
I've gotta chew on all these problems that I've bitten, 
I don't have time to wage your weary war,

but for one last howl,
 I'd grunt and growl,
and caterwaul again
though it never was a question of if,
it's a question of when,
it's a question of when I'll be cunted again,

fucked that is,

come home baby,

if your heart stops a-beatin',
 but your mouth keeps a-eatin',
come home to me,

if your eyes stop a-seein'
but you just keep a-bein',
come home to me,

if your heart feels the rhythm,
of my pulse poundin' jism,
come home to me,

COME HOME TO ME,

come home baby,

said if your lungs stop a-breathin',
but your bite keeps a-teethin',
come home to me,

said if your nose stops a-sneezin',
but your hips keeps a-pleasing',
come home to me,

said if your corpus delecting,
my emotive affecting,
come home to me,

COME HOME BABY,

come home,

I just couldn't make it home tonight,
there's no home now to go to,
home's no longer where I lay my head,
home's wherever I'm with you...

..and it's gone,

Cunted Caterwaul

words can't express,
love,
word can't express,
love,

stopstopstopstopstopstop,
startstartstartstartstart,

words can't express,
the chorus' caress,
and the immerse of verse,
is sure cruel,

but I'll try anyways,
till what I cannot say,
turns a sweet melody,
as whirlpool,

magnet-magnet-magnetize,
well I wonder,
magnet-magnet-magnet eyes,
well I wonder,

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,11,

tick-tick-tick-tick-talk,

I've got no friends to hold me down,
just meaningful of ends of a living sound,
the mind pretends, the flesh resounds,
I've got no friends to hold me down,

I've got no friends to hold me up,
with hands that poured a poisoned cup,
of gilly grass and Ganymede,
and stain glass stare of shy charade,

it's been unfair,
 but what do I care?
reality is illusory,
and a sand castle on the sea shore,
 is swallowed by the tide,

and I've been blessed to hold,
time to unfold,
myself unto a higher mercy,
that knows not death from any breath,
and that's where I would reside,

oh someone wake me I'm dreaming,
oh someone wake me I'm dreaming,

I'm dreaming I'm awake,

sent the song and got no answer,
 least I couldn't understand her,
"mister, mister what's your program?
everything you see is god damn"

my pain program makes me feel ugly,
least that you could do is hug me,
"mister, mister what's your program?
everything you see is god damn"

my heart went through,
all the things it would do,
if I ran into my lady,

the abattoir skree,
mating crows in the tree,
it's a grotesquery,
 for the guessing,

I'd be stilling my shores,
but there's flies on my sores,
and I crawled on all fours,
to the blessing,

deliver me from entropy,
help myself to be helping me,
been lost SO long,
in lapping lies,
that I've closed my ears,
and closed my eyes,

Persephone rises with spring,
and every little thing,
she leaves me in the frigid deep,
with nothing but the cold I keep,

if the sun can't rise behind my eyes,
cause winter is wearing the wayfare,
then I'll still all of the lunar lakes there,
and reflect without within,
for my engines run on come undone,
since the self, memory unraveled,
and every road that I once travelled,
forked tongue and dead of end,

as I tried to break the reflection
and I tried to break the reflection,
till I cracked up in every direction,

now I shatter into sound,

all stifled stories drowned so dearly,
even though there's no one near me,
I'll flood in feeling, make no malice,
your memory's a pretty palace,
kept pristine where time can't swallow,
I just had to go where no one would follow,

my heart went through,
all the things it would do,
if I ran into my lady,

"mister, mister what's your program?
everything you see is god damn"

Dead-Alive

my heart went through,
all the things it would do,
if I ran into my lady,

Melody Malady M'lady

on a moon of Saturn,
etched into the black etheric plane,
we spoon them into pattern,
feeding them on the placenta of pain,

so you're going Care-bear countdown,
to quench the ice and firey salve,
you're feeding stray ghosts,
the finest vomits that you have,

a chair to sit in,
a chair to sit in,
a chair to sit in,

(caveman grunt)

you see...if you make a cake and you use the finest ingredients from all over the world...(he can see!)... but you mix in just a little bit of your own feces...then that's still a shit cake...(take a bite!)...it doesn't matter how good those ingredients were...and me?...I'm NOT going to take a bite...(please?)

the question was an answer,
 and loosing was the choosing of the game,
(extinction)
I saw the earth was burning,
and each of us was trying to breathe the flame,
(extinction)

that book's a patchwork beast,
grifting corpses for a new skin graft,
and it's NOT funny,
but I'll die if I don't stat to laugh,

laugh, laugh laugh...CRY
laugh, laugh, laugh...CRY

a chair to sit in,
a chair to sit in,
a chair to sit in,

A Chair To Sit In

Because it's not normal,
to be all by yourself,
writing songs, all day long,
with nothing else,

and if I came to your party,
dressed in not but a song,
why you'd kick me out,there's no doubt,
but don't get me wrong,

I'm still...(mating call)

I was burning the bridge,
cause the smoke smelled SO sweet,
now there's not 'neath my feet,
but those contempting conceits,

oh rain fall on fever,
 and a sweet wash away,
if you take what you mistook,
for barbed was the pop hook,

would you tear it out for me?
I would tear it out for you...

(you know I would)

I stumbled by your window,
club footedly,
caught you there, beyond compare,
naked dancingly,

and SO beautiful,
I had to turn away,
and I'm turning still, as it will,
a little everyday,

(mating call)

you were licking your bear cub,
amorphous and black,
giving shape, to the drape,
of the placenta sack,

I was blushing all over,
 in don't ask don't tell,
and my thoughts were whisper well,
though they orbited through Hell,

and the globe it wouldn't spin,
so it's burning or frozen,

  ( to a friend...with my sincere apologies, I know it's something of a Frankenstein monster)

Placenta Sack

born birthed in the backwarding water I am,
some what less than, 
the confession,
of a hydrogen damn,

you don't know me,
in my cataract caul,
but it's HOLY,
so they voodoo my doll,

and it wittles out a spout,
from my attention span,
telling the neighbors,
I'm the Bogey man,

cause I'm GENTLE,
and I'm seething with rage,
"temperamental...
so don't rattle his cage"

stuck between these,
parenthesis,
and to the lay of the lock,
they've been cutting my keys,

but I'm all out of doors,
down on all fours,
praying to myself, 
that you might finally get yours,

for a dead end sign,
where do you begin?
you don't know me,
but you swallow my grin,
and it shows me,
a little "where-have-you-been",
and it's HOLY,
so I'm singing my djinn,

and it's holy,

some applause for the laws,
that lovers might make,
but it's a murder machine,
 and it's milking my ache,

and my udders are utterly sore,
so I mutter to myself as I peak out the door

I'm in third person and plural pronouns,
it's the last lament of the 13th clown,
12 are happy but they're painted to frown,
his make up smiles but his lips droop right down,

he haws and he hems,
for he's not like them,
to be shot from the cannon,
has he been condemned,

your laughter's the lash,
from a wind up car crash,
him and his 12 clown disciples,
trip out the dash,

and when I'm dead,
you'll be buying my breath,
you don't know me,
but you sentence my death,
and it shows me,
that all life is precious,
and it's HOLY,
even this beautiful mess,

the betrayer obeyer,
sharpens her tongue,
in the hush ridden mist,
of what he will become,

Curdled Thunder,
you gotta gird up your loins,
buried under,
your army of counting coins,

thoughts who clot in a rot,
of first come first serve,
but I'm gonna straighten out the hatin',
of my learning curve,

except you're hateful,
so I can only be kind,
and be thankful for a leaving behind,

neutering nails
Jimpy of Jails,
exoskeleton soaring,
on labia sails,
and I wish you the best,
you and your nest,
of inter-dimensional,
parasitic infest,

Artyrdom

i wake into mourning,
from artificial dreams,
the voice in my head,
is all whispering screams,

the sky bleeds sucralose and sulfur,
black following cloud,
and stormy the stencil,
that laughs me out loud,

for I am that absence,
outlined by the storm,
and i am that straight line,
demeaned to deform,

innocence doesn't bend that way,
and all that is mine,
is that corner of faith,
 i place on the shrine,

Ayrr'n-Arh'nn-Arh...

impounded heart beats a funeral march,
you know what i mean,
you gotta keep all of your Catholics clean,

Ayrr'n-Arh'nn-Arh,
Ayrr'n-Arh'nn-Arh,

this isn't loneliness...it's long division,
just this and only this,
sweet song and vision,
"wade not those waters,
think of your daughter,"


i wake into unevenings,
 oft lopsided ilk,
suckled on Sistine's,
black cataract milk,

inflatable famines,
 are bloating up gaunt,
where the more that you have is,
 the more that you want,

the meaning of life is,
 to get what you can,
the law of stuffed shirts is,
 the clothes make the man,

Amus-ignore,
all my messages to self destruct,
all my tales are to be tritely tucked,

Ayr'nn-Ahr'nn-Arh...

assembly lined,
populist herders sell slaves back to themselves,
castrated clocks stuck on the number twelve,

Ayr'nn-Ahr'nn-Arh...
Ayr'nn-Ahr'nn-Arh...

this isn't loneliness...it's long division,
just this and only this,
sweet song and vision,
"wade not those waters,
think of your daughter,"

Gingivitus

Ricki Lake,
Ricki Lake,
Ricki Lake,

set aside
 i can always say "no",
cause it's about where you are
and not where you go,
now life's brought you back
to that very same space,
but are you looking down
 from a higher place?

homeless again,
just like back when,
my insides went rotten,
and i haven't forgotten,
this person i am,
the depth of the damn,
that breaks into nowhere,
and i don't wanna go there,

I'm bidden,
bid open by a (...)
bidden,
bid  open by a (what do you know)

oblivion's veil,
is  chasing your tail,
and pollute in powder,
and louder and louder,
and all the way down,
I'm deaf to the drown,
of a litter of longings,
nowhere belonging,

I'm bidden,
bid open by a (...)
bidden,
bid open by a (what do you know),

Ricki Lake,
Ricki Lake,
Ricki Lake

Hemlock dreams,
 and my heart starts to purr,
the cut out seams,
of a cullible cure,
now life's brought you back
to that very same space,
but are you looking down
 from a higher place?

don't drown me in that Rikki Lake,
my lungs full of lies,
that promise the skies,
as I'm falling,

so take a miss from a BIG mistake,
arms full of erase,
I don't wanna embrace,
as I'm calling,

drowning in that Ricki Lake,
the words that I've spoken,
my off button broken,

Ricki Lake

"I'm not ready" he said,
yet he knew in his heart,
when the cocoon breaks...it's time to fly,

whose helping me harness
 my faith to my doubt?
Solitude my succor,
my drawn draught of drought,

here hidden I'm bidden
stay within without,
for hither I wither,
with her...my devout,

I love you,

"I love you too",

what do you know?

evil is?...as if,
Evil is as if,

it's goodbye to my nursery of trees,
goodbye to all of the wild raspberries,
my solitary stump where I learned to breathe,
the cocoon cave(BREAK OUT!),
 where the terrors teethe,

so I'm learning to learn,
cause I don't know,

guess I"m gonna have to learn how to learn...

Chrysalis Shatter

cast down over me,
cast down into the light,
voices that won't agree,
with my second sight,

so break all your promises,
shattered into pretty little lies,
easily recognized,
 by your disguise,

love,
I have love,
and I'm not afraid to say it,
like some torrid four letter word,
and I'm not afraid if the words don't rhyme,

cast down into me,
cast down almost every night,
time was wrong with me,
it seemed so right,

so break all your promises,
shattered into pretty little lies,
time was wrong with me,
that's no surprise...

Just Another Dream Song...

if ever you want to,
I'll be an absent friend,
and whatever haunts you,
I'll be an ear to lend,

I've no expectations,
I've got no passing toll,
those skeleton keys,
were thrown down a bottomless hole,

now every silence,
is a dream come untrue,
if ever you want to,
I'd be a friend to you,

your flowers,
 blossom at heady heights,
over glowers,
of stabbing lights,

petals bloom,
only to fall,
so your crying,
 out winter's call,

for each beginning seems an end,
and you could use a friend,

don't pass through that dead end doorway,
eyes drinking cataract milk,
slowing fast on the my-way/your-way,
spider's could spin the sweetest silk,

that never,
it pulls you down,
still making,
your pretty sound,

it's fated,
each blossom's on it's own,
isolated, 
but not alone,

each petal moves with spring,
and every little thing, 

don't pass through that dead end doorway,
eyes drinking cataract milk,
slowing fast on the my-way/your-way,
spider's could spin the sweetest silk,

If ever you want to...

you cried for days...

from juvenile hall, 
to the psych ward,
to a foster home up north...

where you shovel snow,
in 50 below,

now your living on their left overs,
in your foster home uniform...

and they cut your hair...
like a christian prayer...

you were holding yourself hostage,
till they starved you from your room,
and it was BAD...

old testament bad...

foster home haircut,
you cried for days...

your social worker forbids,
you wear anti-social clothes,
but what are those?
seems that no one knows,

foster home haircut,

your foster brother Ben,
has fetal alcohol syndrome,
with eyes on the side,
and the nose so wide,

there's a dog named Odin,
who devours puppies,
and you hide away,
with the stolen ashtray,

foster home haircut...

Foster Home Haircut

lard lake is leaking out,
to flaunt the sores,
it wears on the inside,
and how 'bout yours?

tied to an inside track,
by Break-My-Heart,
I watch it belly up,
to play the part,

me am no human,
boy nor girl,
me no live in Bizzaro World,
and me am SO VERY HAPPY!

me no line up for swish and spit,
me no have sickness cause of it,
and me am SO VERY HAPPY!

everywhere that I turn is inside out,
the whispers deafening a silent shout,
arrange the letters in cadence and rhyme,
resolve the discord and dissolve the time,

me am no human,
boy nor girl,
me no live in Bizzaro World,
and me am SO VERY HAPPY!

me no line up for swish and spit,
me no have sickness cause of it,
and me am SO VERY HAPPY!

Bizzarro World

the sun set still birth,
at a northern hour,
the trees were glowing,
in the winter glower,

branches glistened aura,
naked and needful in the night,
my heart reached for Aurora,
as if she'd descended in her light,

cold cruel circumspection,
reduced the miracle I had seen,
to the formaldehyde reflection,
cast off a distant T.V screen...

it's just a song I've been ignoring,
because it was a little boring,
but the second time I dreamed it,
well...I knew that I could mean it,

when it said
"follow me! follow me!"
when it said
"follow me! follow me!"
when it said

why I oughta:

be a mist of hearing ear and soaring slum,
so gracious to the unborn world to come,

if the dead end circle turns,
where no one can find her...let me know,
you beacon set to burn! 
you precious reminder!..bring me low,

my head to rest,
on your birch bark breast,
like a baby swaddled in snow,
and your thunder clap!
and you sipping sap!
and your halo crown of crow!

it's just a song I've been ignoring,
because it was a little boring,
but the second time I dreamed it,
well...I knew that I could mean it,

when it said
"follow me! follow me!"
(you know that I will)
when it said
"follow me! follow me!"
(you know that I will)
when it said

why I oughta

Boring Song!

i bore to you a houndly frolic,
every rise and fall,
my backwords barkened by the rollick,
unheedy my call,

you gouged my grip, in scented slip,
for every phantom sniff,
and all that was, was lost because,
of wandering what if,


I bore to you a houndly frolic,
every fall and rise,
where winter whittled worry,
and unheedy went my cries,

your absence cast my echo,
in collide-a-scope collapse,
and all that is, was fleeting fizz,
for petulant perhaps,


so you tottered in a circle broken,
down on widdershins,
to engrave what must be left unspoken,
save by bitter grins,
upon the insides of my eyelids,
whence now even shorn and shuttered,
doth the vision of derision,
that the bitter grins have muttered,
cast it's kindling, sharp and spindling,
on the clenching of sightlesson,
so I'm sealing every feeling,
just to keep my keep from guessing,

A Houndly Frolic

a light house gun,
a petting sun,
a dream eater,
UNBECOME,

a drowning spell,
called wishing well
in which I fell,
UNBECOME,

leering icky lyrics,
that can't explain the sunshine,
you'd really have to hear it,
to know that it was once mine,

still it breathes my burden,
never leaves me lonely,
but can't explain my hurtin',
or be my one and only...

(KRAV MAGA!!!!)

would you claw your cheeks and neck,
while you seek out disrespect,
to build your funereal pyre higher?

ashes and ursury,
a tolken show of misery,
oh Sadness...singing a love song to no one,

the subject matter isn't mine,
or even standing in the line,
he builds a long lament,
and back is bent, and binding is the burrow,

subtraction sorrows in,
all the sounds I'm borrowed in,
a severed touch...
and I'm waiting,

mare of musty must,
don't leave me fetishizing rust,
so songful...a frozen waterfall,
...waiting,

casting out a net,
in fever few and can't-forget,
aren't you the singe of song,
I've sung SO long...
and screaming?


I'm running from me,
 but I'm alone with myself,
the mirror is a trap,
that comes and sits in your lap,
oh Sickness,

hangs me, hangs me, hangs me softly,
hangs me, hangs me, hangs me up,

pretty is the canter-call,
that frees my frozen waterfall,
my tongue tied taut to cut both ways,

 and I think I have some problematics,
surrounded by problemed addicts,
still the will my pretty plucking eye,

the melody will lead you,
and it's telling me it freed you,
for the melody will lead you to itself,

to you I'm just this cardboard cut out,
bored ignore and surely shut out,
so I speak right through you,
to tomorrow's tide,

once there was fleeting forever,
riding a girl named "Whoever",
these days I'm disgusted,
far and wide,

still I search so-low and long,
for a woman to wear my song,
who vibrates on this perfect pitch... so pure,

stifling my shout,
as I'm trying to get out,
of this indignity,
and won't the worry know it's me?
and let me be? 

Man's a tame animal,
and a social cannibal,
a homogenized hoarder,
with a pecking disorder,

seek not truth faithful one,
but cease to cherish all opinion,

the words of this song,
they somehow went wrong,
one day it might all be forgiven,
...but today's an imprecation,

the intention's were right,
but I'm not up to the fight,
they tie a man to the tether,
and tear him apart together,

seek not the truth,
cherish not opinion,
you'll just be lashed,
 by a latent, willful misunderstanding,

they'll kick the bass out,
from under your pout,
you're left clinging to the pretentions of a rebel,

when that's just one more guise,
co-opted by lies,
you'll have to step down,
 as the key changes rise above you,

STEP DOWN,

(Op.6 in i minor) Rhapsodisiac: Bridge to Spinal Bifida

(dedicated to all fellow targets and victims of non-consensual mind control experiments and ritual satanic abuse...you are not alone!)


hey there...you're not alone,
you are not a,
you are not alone

(i/you)

you put your hands in the air,
sip the sun like a tree,
temple of nature,
she's so beautiful angry,

so come take a sip of the storm!
dance in the wrath of the rain,
sometimes our branches must break,
before we blossom again,

are you afraid to get wet?
cause you know,
 i really,
i wish you would,

i wish you would my wishing well...

hey there... you are not alone,
you are not a,
you are not alone...now,

these days I call doing my best:
"bleeding beautifully with flair and finesse",
cause DAMN...they're microwaving my head,
it's quite a climb now just  to get out of bed,

human door knobs,
have been taking my turns,
my hurt to murmur,
 and radiation burns,
cause OWWW...my life's a cage in a lab,
and everyone I love has taken a stab,

hey there...you're not alone,
you are not a,
you are not alone

(i/you)

you put your hands in the air,
sip the sun like a tree,
temple of nature,
she's so beautiful angry,

so come take a sip of the storm!
dance in the wrath of the rain,
sometimes our branches must break,
before we blossom again,

are you afraid to get wet?
cause you know,
 i really,
i wish you would,

i wish you would my wishing well...

Wishing Well

"Write from Wrong"

and if you told me to "look but not touch,
 I'd stare at your sun till my eyes set as such,
 that mine eyes should be dashed where the river rocks roar,
 as long as I washed up upon your sweet shore,
 I'd stare at your star till it fell from my sky
 breathing a teething to soften your sigh,
 gorging my gaze in a creative craze,
 on this dream that doth stream through my nights and my daze...

...and then if you told me, " be seen but not heard",
 not a mutter would stutter away with my word,
 that my silence would stifle the city's shrill shroud,
 my thunder staid under the cleft of your cloud...

...and if you told me "your steed is your scream ",
 then the clatter would shatter this saturnine stream
 I've been wading in fading, so wantless and wracked,
 by the reap of a sow I can never take back...

...and still if you told me to "write but don't reach",
 let the burden be heard in my every beseech,
 why the wheel of my woe it would wind me my way,
 so scant I would pant for the light of your day...

...and still if you told me to "tread but don't try",
 not a finger would linger in passionate pry,
 but my will would not still for the sate of a second,
 until I was bade by the bless of your beckon,
 how I've bound up my breathing and paced in my place,
 and I sent out my sound just to find me your face,
 writing my wrongs till I come out as clever,
 to be planting my songs in your fields of forever,

...and then if you told me to cease still born seeing,
 and bathe this burden in the beauty your being,
 then my stars would cross heaven and hell, sky and sea,
 That a beautiful world...It should happen to me,

Bad Penny Arcade

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