It's Christmas Time at the back of the church,
As I wobble from stout, I'm wondering what's worse,
Letting Family A know about Family B,
Or the strange look the priest is shooting at me.
He says "put away your phones, this is God's holy house"
But sure I've got to keep an eye on the ponies running out

I don't know if Christmas
Will be so great this year.
Cause I've lost all my money on horses
And I spent the rest on beer.

And the kids will be disappointed,
With no presents under the tree,
Cause I've lost all my money on horses,
And spend the rest on me.

Verse II

I got my nine year old a second-hand book about Stalin and my wife got a half drank bottle of Staropramen.

My son is only getting a kick up the hole
If he tries wasting anymore of my dole

Family B are the ones I love,
So I won’t even see them because,

If you love them let them free and if you’re half as cut as me, you’d rather be down the bookies.

Santa are you listening,
Cause the debt I’m in is crippling,
And I’m fucked

I lost all my money on Christmas,
Now I have no money for the ponies,
I lost all my money on Christmas,
Donated it all to the refugees/
Spent all my money on Christmas,
Bought a CD of the Best of the Fugees

Christmas Will B So Great This Year (I don't think)

Yellow plates, it's time to drive
Foot to the floor, it's time to die
German car,
Italian suit,
Polish lager,
French onion soup.

Get out of my way, cunt
The Big Dick is back,
With a brand new accent, 
And a brand new track.

Walk into the boozer, leave the bird at home,
Send a pic of my dick from my new iPhone,
Follow me on OnlyFans, five euro a month
Gimme all your money you fucking cunt

Big Dick
Big Dick
Big Dick
Big Dick

Guess who's back? 
Back again...
It's the Big Dick...with no friends....

Big Dick
Big Dick
Big Dick
Big Dick
credits
released April 17, 2022 
Rev. Barry Frink
The Bad Buzz

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