will woo

SELF-iSH

Cotards Solution (Anatta, Dukkha, Anicca) (Remastered)

Mr Capgras Encounters A Secondhand Vanity... (Remastered)

Hand Me My Shovel, I'm Going In! (Remastered)

The Song With Five Names (Remastered)

will wood - suburbia overture / greetings from mary bell township! / (vampire) culture / love me, normally ( slowed + pitched + vampire culture part only )

vampire culture

music & lyrics by Will Wood
Produced by Will Wood
Recorded by Simon Ficken at Backroom Studios in Rockaway NJ and Jonathon Maisto at Kawari Sound in Wyncotte PA
Mixed & mastered by Kevin Antreassian
String section and choir arranged by Will Wood
Baritone ukulele, piano, keyboards - Will Wood
Upright bass - Vater Boris
Electric guitar - Mike Bottiglieri
Strings - Yoed Nir
Choir - Sofia Session Choir & Orchestra LTD.

==Lyrics==

I was right there  
While you fought tooth and nail
Gasping in the gas mask thrashing till you disappeared
Say you’re not scared, that you know it’s cause I cared and
Say you know I love you, and that hope was just not there

And I know, I know that I’m wrong
That when you’re gone you’re gone 
And I can’t bring you home
But I want, I want to believe
That you’ll remember me when you’re just memory

Roots in the ground
Or uploaded to the cloud or
Warm inside our hearts or as electrons in our head – nowhere now
Over the rainbow, can I stop by and say hello and
Sorry I would take it back if I could but I know

To love one from too far to call
Is not to love at all, to whom is it I talk?
But I want, I want to believe 
That you can still hear me when you’re just memory

Said “it’s okay”
And “It’ll be all be over soon"
I’d never let a bad thing happen to you
Now goodnight I love you

And every, everybody dies 
Fighting for their lives, just trying to survive
Well now I know, I know why we say
That there’s a better place that waits beyond the grave, oh

And I know, I know it’s not true. 
There’s just no more you but as long as there’s no proof
Then I choose, I choose to believe 
That we’ll met in sweet dreams after you’re put to sleep

Euthanasia

I’m that first-person they talk about in all the books
I’m that perspective you cannot doubt, see how I look
Control the narrative reliably, baby it’s all about me
And I wrote the book about throwing the book at those who
Don’t do it by it
So now I’m holding myself hostage, Stockholm lust just looks like justice
And enough lefts don’t make the right but two wrongs do
Oh man, Sun Tzu would love this.
Beating my dead high horse off the high road to low ground cause
If you shake your fist at snakes in grass it looks like punching down.

So God forbid I’m seen just as an average human being
I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene
I’m the gap between a tragedy and comedy, don’t come at me
I’m the main character, and you have to like me

I loot plot-armor from NPC’s, well they are to me
Trite tropes, traits, traumas, trinkets, and treats. It’s all XP. Look in the
Sky, it’s a bird, it’s a plane, no it’s super-ego! The underdog you cheer for
Villains are everywhere, that’s how I know I’m the hero
So tie me to the train tracks, laugh and snidely twist your mustache, Snidely Whiplash
Boris Badinov, ignorin’ me’s bad enough, where do you get off?
Da, das vadanya darling, Daleks in high collars monologue 
And I outsmart them with a ray-gun and a tweet

So God forbid I’m seen just as an average human being
I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene
I’m the gap between a tragedy and comedy, don’t come at me
I’m the main character, and you have to like me

Judge me by what my cover shows, author becomes beyond reproach
You don’t know the prose, or if the spine is still intact.
Oh, like Alice fell to wonderland, come astroturf my Overton
Embolden my demand to live by alternative facts.

Her majesty says "the royal we demand a standard loyalty” 
An agreement to be reverent, lick the emperor’s new boots.
The court fool got the guillotine, the witches the stake, you the dopamine 
And Siemens made the Zyklon B, but we all still get the flu. (It’s nothing new)
We all do what we need to to get through.
But I ain’t done a fucking thing to you.

So god forbid I’m seen just as an average human being, I mean
Imagine if antagonists lacked any evil scheme
I’m the gap between a tragedy and comedy, don’t come at me
I’m the main character and you have to like me.

The Main Character

Wonder how I didn’t die 
This is not my life. I’m no survivor, I only happened to survive.
Wonder how I sleep at night 
Well I count pink elephants, blessings and skeletons
Down the days I have left, with one eye open 
That was me screaming “Bitch, I am reality.”
And stumbling off to lose myself in a brown paper bag cause me and
Sweet Evan Williams got a date down on Avenue 
A staving shakes scraping change till daybreak 
Turns out anyone can eat out the trash
Then wake up on the freeway mid-crash

Cause I was drunk when I made my bed
Now with a half-decade hangover I lay down in it
What have I done? Don’t know what I’ve said
It’s a half-decade hangover, either this, in jail, or dead
It’s a half-decade hangover, Jesus Christ my aching head

Waste not want not borrowed time
Lender knows I’ve tried, to make it right, give back my life and if not
Take it cause lately I been thinking maybe I could
Take it or leave it if I can’t at least break even then I’m leaving when
I been feeling this awful since I hit bottom and
said “hand me my shovel, I’m going in.”

Oh brother – man, you call that recovered?
Tripped on a couple steps, and collapsed on the stairs
Broke my neck on the backs of those who I’ve hurt and scared
Like it’s a good thing, you said “you’ve got your whole life ahead”
Oh great, another half a century to live to regret
I’d rather be anybody else instead

Cause I was drunk when I made my bed
Now with a half-decade hangover I lay down in it
What have I done? Don’t know what I’ve said
It’s a half-decade hangover, either this, in jail, or dead
It’s a half-decade hangover, Jesus Christ my aching head

Sober, but so much still hangs over
Please believe me when I say I poured my whole past down the drain
Say that a second chance is a chance I can take
But I can’t make amends for things I don’t remember
I can only say I’m sorry and occasionally pray
Guess you’ll just have to take my word that I’ve changed
After one thousand eight hundred twenty five days

I was drunk when I made my bed
Now with a half-decade hangover I lay down in it
What have I done? Don’t know what I’ve said.
It’s a half-decade hangover, hand me my ibuprofen
It’s a half-decade hangover, Jesus Christ my aching head

Half-Decade Hangover

In lipstick on the mirror, are the lyrics to my obituary
In iambic pentameter, followed parameter, crossing my eyes, dot my T's.
I was delivered holding scissors, I live deliberately, I’m a quitter.
And a winner anyway, cause I never agreed to participate in this game.
Won't follow my dreams cause they all got me waking up screaming
I can’t let them go for me, after all there is no “I” in team.

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal
I suggest that we keep this informal
Cause a normal human being wouldn't need
To pretend to be normal to be normal
Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya.
To be normal in a way I couldn’t be.
C’mon, c’mon, and love me normally

If I could live in third person, well I don’t think life would be much worse than it is
In the current tense, presently, this sentence ending in question marks or dot dot dot…
Is it courageous or escapist to leave the quarantine when you’re contagious?
It may just be a cold, and besides I don’t wanna get old yeah
I drank myself to death to be the afterlife of the party
When the afterparty came, I was rolling in my grave.

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal
I suggest that we keep this informal
Cause a normal human being wouldn't need
To pretend to be normal to be normal
Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya.
To be normal in a way I couldn’t be.
C’mon, c’mon, and love me normally

[Spoken]
Now this is the part of the song where I talk to my audience. I like to tell 'em there's something I want from you hep cats tonight. I want you to look to your left, look to your right, your 12 o'clock, three o'clock, six o'clock, nine o'clock, rock around the clock tonight. And I want you to find those points of no return, those singularities, those event horizons, those burning rings of fire in the beautiful pupils and the beautiful eyes of the beautiful boy, girl, neither, both, or in-between that you brought with you tonight. And I want you to tell 'em how you really feel.

I want you to tell 'em that you love the way that they don't stick out like sore middle fingers. That they crawl their way up the side of the bell curve, stick their flag in the peak, and slide their way back down. I want you to tell them that you love the way that they're not maladaptive, not malcontent, not malignant or maleficent, but rather that you love them exactly the way that everybody else is

I was nothing before so I couldn’t have asked to be born
I'll be nothing again, so what am I between now and then?
Is there nothing to fear? Cause shit's getting weird
So to God who made this man, you better have one hell of a plan.

And I'd rather be normal. Yes, so normal
I suggest that we keep this informal
Cause a normal human being wouldn't need. No.
To pretend to be normal to be normal
Well I guess that's the least that I owe ya.
To be normal in a way I couldn’t be.
C’mon, c’mon, yeah, I said c’mon, yeah.
C’mon, c’mon, yeah, I said c’mon, yeah.
C’mon, c’mon, and love me normally

Love, Me Normally - Hawthorne Theater, Portland, OR

(reposting because I wanted to correct a little detail)
Since many people (including me) prefer that part of the demo version (lately I've been wishing I were 5'5 weighing 99 wearing thigh highs) I decided to (try to) put the two together (the official version but replacing only THAT part with the part of the demo version). I made two different versions:
1) The first one has the official drums before the demo part starts playing
2) The second one already starts the demo part on the drums

Will Wood - I / Me / Myself (official+demo) v.2 (demo drums)

NOTHING HERE IS MADE BY ME, EVERYTHING BELONGS TO WILL WOOD

... Well, Better Than The Alternative (Better Alternative Edit)

Chemical Overreaction/Compound Fracture by Will Wood and the Tapeworms, from Everything is a Lot.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uKYiUcHyGIA

Nettles on my saddle and a badge on my vest, better bet I’ll never settle and I never could rest. 
Till the sunrise dies and sets in the west, a rattlesnake bite and a bullet in my chest. 
I won’t stop to drop to draw a line in the sand, ‘cause I’ll be picked apart to pieces by coyotes, I’m a lizard in the hand of the medicine man who is the wizard of the land on wild peyote. 
Woah. 
Aye aye, I eye my eyes, I’m gaining traction. 
Aye aye, I eye my eyes, I’m taking action. 
Aye aye, I eye my eyes, no more distractions. 
I’m done relaxing. I am a chemical reaction. 
Bienvenidos a la villa de arañas españas, where the sentimental value of the city around you is deleted obsolete and still completely will stun you, I’m tripping like a klutz and I’m rolling like thunder. 
I’m a snot nosed pothead playing with matches, a rotten spot of mold with my hands on a cactus. My mouth is dry and my eyes are red, I’m chewing on sand ‘cause the desert’s in my head. 
Aye aye, I eye my eyes, I’m gaining traction. 
Aye aye, I eye my eyes, I’m taking action. 
Aye aye, I eye my eyes, no more distractions. 
I’m done relaxing. I am a chemical reaction. 
Wretch and pule this panoramic, stretched out view is fat with panic. 
Precognition lacks in hindsight, we caught the illness back before the twilight. 
I might be a saint worth steeples, I might be the brain of evil. 
Bad things happen to good people, good things happen to me.


Chemical Overeaction/Compound Fracture

Music and Lyrics by Will Wood,
Featuring Dan Chetnik on Clarinet/Saxophone, Thomas Finch on Drums, James Horvath on Guitar, Ben Scardo on Upright Bass, Will Wood on Piano/Vocals/Chorus

The First Step

Red Moon by Will Wood and the Tapeworms from Everything is a Lot. ©2015

Red, red moon. Keep on rising. 
The sunset soon indeed will bleed in my horizon. 
The crescent rests, tethered to the west. 
Waxing to the rhythm writhing in my chest. 
That crack between the watercolor sky and sea is the 
corner where you’re born in the mist. 
I might deride the tide, ‘cause I’m pulled as it pools about my feet. 
Towards your stolen light, while you’re holding my slight gravity. 

Well I walk the equator, chasing the light; little do I know it orbits close behind. 
I might remember or might assume, but I only turn around every once 
In a red, red moon. I only turn around every once in a red, red, moon. 

Red, red moon. When will your shadows break? 
Tell the truth; what’re you hiding behind that face? 
If matters in then I might space out, 
why can’t I take in what you’ve been putting out? 
Why do I reject while you endlessly reflect? 
While you’re projecting your perfection astounds 
Nighttime, please hide my eyes, so the man up there won’t watch me stare. 
Teach me to make moonshine, and we’ll get drunk on the spirit of the air. 

Well I walk the equator, chasing the light; little do I know it orbits close behind. 
I might remember or might assume, but I only turn around every once 
In a red, red moon. I only turn around every once in a red, red, moon. 

The constellations form infinite paisleys in the sky 
The condensation tumbles down and erases my sight 
And is it in the nightmare map of the cosmos up high? 
Or is it in the signs? Or stranger still, just in my eyes? 

Well I walk the equator, chasing the light; little do I know it orbits close behind. 
I might remember or might assume, but I only turn around every once 
In a red, red moon. I only turn around every once in a red, red, moon.

RED MOON

Lyrics for Thermodynamic Lawyer, Esq. G.F.D. by Will Wood and the Tapeworms from Everything is a Lot omitted by request of attorney.

Thermodynamic Lawyer Esq, G.F.D.

(Cover this Song) A Little Bit Mine, by Will Wood and the Tapeworms, from Everything is a Lot

Say you’re still her 
The woman you were 
And you haven’t turned into 
Someone who never could love me again 
Cause you never broke my heart, no, you fixed it, and now it works. 
But only enough just to suffer the hurt. 
What can I say to convince you to slip back into my arms again? 
I won’t do you no harm again, lemme tell you that I’m sorry and that- 

I’m just a little bit crazy about you. 
Just a little bit out of my mind. 
Just a little insane without you 
Please come back and be just a little bit mine. 

I never thought, and if I did, I forgot 
While blackout in-love 
That’s what’s only starting would come to an end. 
But now I’m hungover and hung out to dry and I’m giving it time. 
Does not knowing the truth turn my words into lies? 
What can I say to convince you or do to make you agree with me? 
I don’t need you to be with me- just try to remember what you’d see in me. 

I’m just a little bit crazy about you. 
Just a little bit out of my mind. 
Just a little insane without you 
Please come back and be just a little bit mine. 

I’ll be here singing until our heartbeats fall into that rhythm again 
Whether it is or isn’t the end; who cares? 
God knows that I could use a friend. 

I’m just a little bit crazy about you. 
Just a little bit out of my mind. 
Just a little insane without you 
Please come back and be just a little bit mine.

(Cover This Song) A Little Bit Mine

White Knuckle Jerk, by Will Wood and the Tapeworms, from Everything is a Lot. 

White Knuckle Jerk (Where Do You Get Off?)

From "Everything is a Lot" by Will Wood and the Tapeworms.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hl5XUM_qoN4

Six-up, five-oh, pigs come, I cop n’ go. 
The blotter shows they got me on the rocks like Galapagos. 
Good luck finding critters creepy as me. They shoulda fried me, I’ll give ya PTSD 
Vodka shots droppin’ down the throat they been stompin’ on. 
Cockin’ guns, lockin’ up, the quotas all for shock n’ awe. 
Drivin’s tirin’, and I been hot-wirin’ to make my get away from the jailbreak riot and 
Cellmates scrapin’ upon the bricks in the basement, 
tryin’ to escape this probation generation- too late! 
Crazy fuckers’ gotta do the time. 
Committed to the mental ward, committing all the crimes. 
I’m alive and kickin’ till the split ends fray. 
Maybe plead insane, guilty, but I’m not to blame! 
I’m a slave to the main vein, sprayin’ on the mainframe. 
Suffering the infrastructure, hoping I can maintain! 
Oh how I know how I go how I go. Ask me a question the answer I know. 
Yes or no options don’t weigh out and so; I don’t ever see the cons and the pros. 

You bare a striking resemblance. 
Some kind of semblance of somethin’ I been rememberin’. 
You appear familiar dear. You look just like my bathroom mirror. 
Please policeman- no heel-to-toe. Oh please, let me go! 
Please police- is it a test? I won’t know till I’m under arrest. 

The drunk-tank’s blood red. Junkie’s gonna relapse. 
Some think punk’s dead, me I don’t believe that. 
Rock n’ roll gatherin’ the moss till I be that lichen-coated boulder, make you slip, 
Bust your kneecap! 
Open on the amazon, hide the cure for cancer. 
I’m Lance Armstrong, you’re the necromancer. 
Slash n’ burn, crash into the 42nd answer, 
all my fellow skeletons adore the army ants here. 
Flies on my eyeballs, scabs on my elbows. 
Heaven knows God’s sittin’ up there like “Hell no!” 
Only one thing comes to those who wait. Is it too late to embrace your fate? 
My death come swiftly and gently to you. 
Mayhem, cry mayday, and oncoming doom. 
Save your convictions, they never will do. What you say’s at least 1/6 billionth true. 

You bare a striking resemblance. 
Some kind of semblance of somethin’ I been rememberin’. 
You appear familiar dear. You look just like my bathroom mirror. 
Please policeman- no heel-to-toe. Oh please, let me go! 
Please police- is it a test? I won’t know till I’m under arrest. 

Am I being detained? Am I under arrest? 
Read me my rights please. I want my phone call. 
Please policeman- no heel-to-toe. Oh please, let me go! 
Please police- is it a test? I won’t know till I’m under arrest.

will woo

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