May 2019 I DID IT ..... on this Beautiful Island Porto Santo     after all these years ...  My Voice is coming back to Me  woooooohoooooo

I felt and wrote this poem many years ago, what an appropriate way to NOW  Releasing 
 Blessings EnJoy INJoy

JOURNEY TO SELF
Oh mind, my biggest teacher of pain,
how I fought you every day,
it did not stop you from returning,
always there to show me the way,
oh mind, you paralysed me with fear,
how I fought you with all of my might,
it did not stop you from returning,
every day and every night


I, the one who was always singing,
had no more words, just pain,
my throat dry and constricted,
time and time again,
I shied away from everyone,
not wanting to walk outside my door,
for fear of meeting others,
my eyes always focussed on the floor


I was ashamed, to show myself,
I could not understand,
why my world was turning upside down,
my Gold turning into sand,
the mask, for sure it was cracking,
the one I had worn for so long,
the mask of, I can do it all.
for I am of course so strong


The mask it crumbled and cracked,
as others stood in fear,
for now as the lady whom appeared,
I was not afraid to show my tears,
I was no longer afraid to ask,
for the help so desperately needed,
for the call of my Heart was heard
and this time it was heeded


So many sad years followed,
trying to find out whom I truly was,
around me misunderstandings rife,
only anger,no Happiness nor Bliss,
as tears ran down my cheeks,
my world collapsing before my eyes,
as again I was not understood,
so many assumptions made and lies


Day by day I always worked,
at more opening of my Heart,
I knew how precious this Gift was,
my New Life in Freedom, to start,
oh there were times, I do assure,
that I was on my knees,
times when I have felt so alone,
times when my tears did not cease


I had to learn not to judge,
for we are all Sisters and Brothers,
I had to learn to never to assume.
myself and no others,
I had to learn to find my truth,
in everything I heard and read,
not always to listen to my mind
but to my Heart instead


I had to learn to Love myself
and this without condition
and to sometimes walk alone,
on this my Journey and my mission
and so I walked, sometimes ran,
always, always learning,
that Love is the one true Source,
a Heart afire and burning


The fear stopped me going into my Heart,
my mind saw Pandora s box,
it saw me kneeling as a little child,
in a lovely dress and white socks,
then taking a deep breath, I opened it,
there were jewels, butterflies, all from beauty,
I couldn’t believe these Gifts were mine,
rewards for my Earthly duty


It was not easy to keep to the Path of Love
though did it, I can proudly say,
as I now stand tall, proud and happy,
still learning every day,
of the Blessings that are given to us,
of The Joy that we can make,
with open arms and open Heart,
Our Blessed New Life, we can take.

To be continued ;O)
I LOVE YOU 💖💓💖
Eternally
BeV
©BeV Stratton-Proemper 2013

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Bev Stratton-Proemper