ATLAS JAWN

thanks to purpan for this lovely beat.
thanks to s for loving me.
thanks to the world for allowing me to function.
:)

loving u (prod. purpan)

edit/update: the person who this song was originally written about is now essentially devoid of respect and likability in my eyes, so now it's a ballad for all of the lovers out there who aren't fucking each other over.

good riddance, s.

thanks, p.

thanks, world.

[peace.love.happiness]

e[u].logy (prod. purpan)

@tomppabeats

love is a sunset; watch it with me.

to download for free, just go to:

http://www.mediafire.com/download/dw5b5bsyrl6csnb/shells+%28prod.+tomppabeats%29.mp3

shells (prod. tomppabeats)

@tomppabeats

welcome to the beach.

thank you for the continued support.

i love each and every one of you with all of my heart. <3

sand (prod. tomppabeats)

much like me, this song is built entirely of metaphors

unscramble them to find the truth

@tomcbumpz

i don't crave death, i just crave peace (prod. tomcbumpz)

@yungestbae <-- everybody check out the homie right this second!

thanks to bennie (http://www.instagram.com/cozylile -- hit him up to buy artwork stuff) for the art!

holding yr hand (prod. yung bae)

@mt-marcy

LYRICS:
i'm sick of trembling in fear at the idea of death
since it's always on my mind i just hide in my bed
"everybody's scared of it" is what my therapist said
but my case seems worse, when i've barely been fed

because the kitchen's too far to desire the steps
it'd take to make it down the stairs and try to find a baguette
or something similar that wouldn't make my stomach upset
it doesn't feel like this is real, yeah, my mind is a mess

the only times it seems clear is when music is played
some relatable creator says i'll soon be okay
or when reading poetry trying to soothe the dismay
and i can lose my insecurities in cute little sayings, like

"why frown when the sun goes down,
if you'll wake in the morning to such nice sounds
when the nighttime creeps, well your eyes might weep
but that's just moonlight tryna find nice people"

"why frown when the sun comes 'round
even if you feel shaken or upside down
when the daytime hits, you'll be great, my friend
just make it through this, just make it through this"

"why frown when the sun comes 'round
even if you feel shaken or upside down
when the daytime hits, you'll be great, my friend
just make it through this, you can make it through this"

meurte

such nice sounds (prod. mt. marcy)

merry christmas, everyone <3
thank you for an incredible year

shout out to everyone who worked on this:
@yungestbae (thanks for the godly beat <3)
@iamsamsa (if you need track art, hit him up)
@atwoodotj
@ibr
@chriswright53
@toccimc
@hheadhaunter
@boof-radley
@offthejump

merry Bhristmas

no one ever said (feat. samsa & the otj crew) (prod. yung bae)

@flayvors

happy valentine's day :)

art by bennie (http://www.instagram.com/cozylile)

this is a thank you for everything
a semi-colon hovering where something once was menacing
a "soon-to-be continued" that exists after the ending screen
the only song i know that i would ever even wish to sing
when the heat is blistering, you're the ice that's glistening
inside my cup of tea, which is also you... interesting
throughout all the seasons, in this transition of winter-spring
you've been here beside me with the sweet nothings you're whispering
you're a lovable, angelic piece of perfect
and anything i do for you is worth it
times a million and a half, we can sit and be resilient and laugh
in between the subtle compliments and billlions of half-
kiss/half-hug/half-cuddle moments we share
i know it's unfair that we could only spend a few days here
but i'm yours, and i think that it's clear
so forget about goodbye, this is "see you soon, my dear"

'cause i love you and i'd like to spend forever
in the sublte warmth inside your arms, like fireplaces' embers
i will try my best to keep you by my side until the weather
turns apocalyptic, and we end up drifting to the nether
but we'd still be wearing sweaters when we got there
'cause we're both too caught up in cuteness to care 'bout hot air
and even if it burnt me alive, i'd have my crosshairs
set up on your heart, making art, 'cause why stop there?
i'll keep on creating for you until my final days
dancing in the living room and smooching while the vinyl plays
i've been losing track of the romantic shit i'm tryna say
but basically i love you and that's kinda gay...
i'ma stay by your side when i can
keep your grip on my hand
'cause we can both hear the compliments coming in from these pals of mine
i've been wondering if you would be my valentine

valentine (prod. flavors)

download <3

hey i went to a place and wrote a song about it!!! bool

i knocked on your bedroom door
and waited for you to answer
i bought you a crimson rose
smelled just like you did

i smiled at the view outside
and stood in your empty driveway
could tell that something was wrong
little did i know

my time there was running short
your kisses were my ambrosia
they melted into my skin
"darling, i love you"

it's awful that i must go
it's awful we have to part now
'cause i left my beating heart
in san diego

san diego

SAN DIEGO

@aimless-beats

hey, everyone is someone at least a little bit different online
don't be scared to be honest, okay?
love you
<3

LYRICS:
we all got internet personas
internet personas we hide behind
we hide behind

we all got demons deep inside us
demons deep inside us we try to hide
we try to hide

i forgot who it is i truly am long ago
but i'll keep searching for it while i can

i knew a boy who could outline a shape in a second
that's display was eclectic in a way that was second to none
he had a hand than swam like fish in the seas
and a penstroke that'd bring any critic to his knees
it was beautiful, flowing like the blood inside my artieries
he painted hearts as targets and was practicing his archery
mastering the artistry he carried in his chest
until at best it was a godsend, and worst, it was a part of me
'til suddenly... things began to seem different
moods dissipated into blue and grey pigments
but surface-wise his screen names were never inefficient
as a method to communicate that happiness was with him
so a couple thousand people saw a perfectly inoccuous complexion
while i was tryna talk him through depression
the lesson to be learned is that your heros aren't invincible
just normal folks who often need expression, so pause and leave a message...

if you want; they'd probably appreciate it...

...internet personas
internet personas we hide behind
we hide behind

we all got demons deep inside us
demons deep inside that we try to hide
we try to hide

i forgot who it is i truly am long ago
but i'll keep searching for it while i can

i knew a person who could cultivate the words that they aligned
in a way that could coerce a train to fly
a perfect state of mind in which to learn creative rhymes
until their person was emburdened by the verses they designed
and they began to lose their touch...
the little quirks in all their writing became terse and uninviting
and ingesting any lettering they surgeoned into life
instead of being entertainment was inert and just absurd and all the work was fucking tiring
and suddenly... they were writing less and less
in spite of their success they saw no light and second guessed
the creativity they harbored in their heart
there's only so much fucking artwork you can make 'til you forget the way to start
so a couple million people saw some dipping in the frequency
of music while they fought idiosyncracy
that slept as mental illness... and woke as some peculiar train of thought
that masqueraded as a symptom of a hindering deliquency

i hope that all these words have made you think of me

internet personas, internet personas
we all got internet personas, internet personas (x7)

internet personas (prod. aimlessbeats)

internet personas (prod. aimless)

with @nevermending

lyrics:

i turned 19 three months back
and i still can't fathom how to act
'cause this adult shit's kinda whack
i'd rather lay inside and read
and treat my life like a weekend

and all my friends will slowly
move away and change
and i'll be left here feeling strange
with all my comrades out of range
for me to reach

it seems so odd to have to
redesign yourself
'cause you're so much of someone else
that they feel like it's unhealthy

but i guess it's part of life
to surrender what you like
in favor of the things you have to do 
and there's so much i have to do
these days

these days

i'm turning 18 in a month 
going off to art school is coming up 
and i'm scared for what's going to happen

i'm going through a breakup 
and i only cope with things i shouldn't 
i get myself into trouble too much 
lately

all my friends are anarchists
and i don't know what i think 
things are too complicated 
and the world is full of shit 

my inner pessimist is out 
full of anxiety and doubt 

i'm not ready for what's next

parking garage sesh

i'm not ready

i miss u

yea

LYRICS:
maybe it's the question, maybe it's the answer
i don't know the reason now
and maybe it's your eyelids, maybe it's the moonlight
but something beautiful sticks out

and i'm in my bedroom, watching through the window
stare at the sunlight, wonder where the time is going
you're in the bathroom
crying with your shirt undone
now we're on the freeway, speeding past a cop car
stole your mom's van, and took it for a test drive
and you're sat in the backseat
looking at your best friend's hair

i wanna be more than a cheat day in your diet plan
you can be the lungs, baby, i can be the diaphragm
just breathe, just breathe, and you'll be fine
just breathe, just breathe, it happens all the time

CHEAT DAY

it's never enough </3

lyrics:
i'm prodding around this vacancy
this empty hole you left in me
i thought i'd fill it soon
with someone else's skin and you would too
i'm sorry for you how feel
i know you see that swerve behind the wheel
you see yourself inside the ground
and i know i can't fix you with sound

but i can try

if you'll open up your eyes
and i'll show you the way i dive
into this ocean of dismay
this terrifying grey in which i sleep
and there's no disguise
i just wait for my demise
as it comes towards me
it can't ignore me...

anymore

and i'll keep losing friends
whether it's to death or to the wind
it's such a passing trend
being a breathing and living person
at least it seems that way these days
with how often my loved ones slip away
i'm growing concerned for my safety...

i hope i'm not next
i'm too scared to die
the concept is frightening
but still i can try
and i hope you're not next
i love you too much
everything you say
i use as a crutch

so open up your eyes
and i'll show you the way i dive
into this ocean of dismay
this terrifying grey in which i sleep
i know the void
all my patience is destroyed
when i start panicking again
and start ignoring all my friends

but i hope i'm not next
i'm too scared to die
the concept is frightening
but still i can try
and i hope you're not next
i love you too much
everything you say
is never enough

NEVER ENOUGH

this is a song about dissociating 

produced by fats'e 
soundcloud.com/youngburial 
twitter.com/youngburial 

art by ghostly pixels 
twitter.com/ghostly_pixels

lyrics:
laying alone, i dissociate 
laying alone 

i saw a pictureframe 
and it turned out to be a mirror 
my reflection's so much clearer 
when i'm not aware it's me 

i saw a maple tree 
it was growing in my head 
when everybody else was dead 
and i climbed up it just to see 

i saw myself again 
but i stood outside my being 
i could understand that being 
isn't all there is to be 

i see the future now 
got too distracted by the present 
to remember that my head is 
not a vehicle for fear 

and it's a long way down if you fall 
and it's a long way up if you don't 

and it's a long way down if you fall 
and it's a long way out, so 

i sit in the center 
and i ponder my disinterest 
for it all 

it's a lot easier 
to imagine ending things 
(to imagine ending things) 
when i'm watching myself 
from the third person 
(from the third person) 

it's a lot easier 
to imagine changing things 
(to imagine changing things) 
when i'm watching myself 
from the third person 
(from the third person)

dissociate (prod. fats'e)

ukulele by @imtiffany
art by https://twitter.com/phiIotechnicaI

"you were my earth"

atlas

you're my world

@southvb

more like GAYboy lmao RT

lyrics:
i just want my hand held, i ain't talking gameboys
and i ain't been in magazines, but me and you can play, boy
i'm looking for the same joy, the same touch and smolder
that i get when i lay my head down on your shoulder
that's real... i always wanna know how you feel
you bring me out my great depressions, i think you're the new deal
i'm staring at you in the mirror like fucking blue steel
wide-eyed, smiling, i'm just tryna help your mood heal

so if there's anything that i can do
to help the weaker side of you
just lemme know and i can move
my schedule up and down

i'm sorry if i haven't been
the best at how i'm managing
the problems that i'm handling
my head was in the ground

and truly, it's a miracle
that you are even near me, whether
fruitless or endearing
i'll be happy you're around

and if you're feeling terrible,
your sicknesses unparalled,
your headache is unbearable,
just step into the sound

i don't mind at all
my ibuprofen and my tylenol
are yours at the sound of your sirens' call
'cause i ain't letting you hurt tonight at all
tonight at all

i don't mind at all
my ibuprofen and my tylenol
are yours at the sound of your sirens' call
'cause i ain't letting you hurt tonight at all
tonight at all

handheld (prod. south.vibe)

happy early valentine's day uwu

produced by @byrook1e and @skyhighbeatss 
mixed by @halberd-3000
cover art designed by @landosmusic

lyrics:
it feels like i'm skydiving when i text you 
rose petals on the floor outside your bedroom 
sunshine, whenever you smile, it's the best view 
i was at the bottom waiting for a rescue 

but now it's like a paradise enveloped in light 
everyone's probably aware, but i'ma tell 'em despite 
even telling 'em twice, you're a hella delight 
you've got a smile like a story that i'd tell every night 

and if you're feeling sickly, i'ma break out the campbell's 
and make sure you get your hand held damn well 
if you can't tell, i'm in a bit of a trance 
such a pretty romance, the way it fits in the plans 

it's like a sundress on an early afternoon 
up next, i'm just curling up with you 
no question, i guess that it's the truth 
you're just really fuckin' cute 

sunshine, i'm watching 
through the window 
i can hear the birds outside 

sunshine, there's something 
in the air 
i can feel it when you're there

sunshine

produced by @jhfly

lyrics:

i often sit and wonder how your hand would feel
if we were sitting on my carpet sharing chamomile
keep a lot of little secrets that i can't reveal
until we're high at 3 am just sharing chamomile
(x2)

i guess...

i've got a letters that i've written
a few of them i'm tempted to incinerate
they tend to pile up around my desk
at the frequency of sadness and dinner plates
it's easy to get lost inside of memories
it's harder to pretend that isn't bothersome
you told me 'bout your favorite kinds of flowers
so i went to the market and i got you some

i didn't even break down when i left my house
i didn't even get anxious when i went out
you know the words never sound quite right when they leave my mouth
but, darling, just finish your tea, and we'll go lay down
we can go lay down

i often sit and wonder how your hand would feel
if we were sitting on my carpet sharing chamomile
keep a lot of little secrets that i can't reveal
until we're high at 3 am just sharing chamomile

flowers ep

chamomile (prod. jhfly)

produced by @mt_fujitive
cover photo shot by @chriswrightotj

i have a cold

lyrics:
i'm getting sick of constant negativity, searching for some clarity
try to switch my mind around, reversing the polarity
and scuttle through the undertow, an urgent need for therapy
coercing me to stray from my roots

i've even practiced sacrficing bad news to aphrodite statues
antagonized by past dues, i'm camera shy and fat too
diet plan is snack food, banana pies and cashews
the person that i dream to be, i pantomime with tattoos
but even still, i sense the glimmer of my confidence
hiding under ink i got to mimic my accomplishments
they're few and far between, sort of timid in their promises
drowning subtle whispers with the engine of a rocketship

i can't linger any longer in the past
i'm not the person that i was back then
romanticizing everything, the flowers in the grass
were a stepping stone for expressing my love back then
but now i'm jaded as i cautiously detach
from all the people that i loved back then
drowning every issue via vodka from a flask
to think, the only thing i wanted was a hug back then

sick of constant negativity, searching for some clarity
try to switch my mind around, reversing the polarity
and scuttle through the undertow, an urgent need for therapy
coercing me to stray from my roots

ATLAS JAWN

suicide no doubt