все понимаю, но не понимаю

vol. 11

1: SlowmeDown: 
Are my feelings valid? Shall i trust the muscle in my skull to keep my soul safe? Shall i be led by desire? Should i give in, or should i hold on? He who puppeteer's my flesh and bones, who am i? Where do i reside? How may i feel okay? 
May i be free?

2: FearMonger: 
static in my head tells me to resist. i'm falling while standing still. pain is ever-moving, and ever-changing. I do not know where my destination lies, if i'm destined for death where must i go to get there?
how may i be free?

3: DownwardSpiral: 
the pulses and gurgles my flesh capsule produce only strike as a reminder of who i am, and what im stuck in. like a wired machine my ego fades between sight sound touch and smell as each one crams into the remaining space in my soul. no more. please, no more.
let me be free.

4: HangedMan: 
How many more parts of myself must i lose to feel okay again? flesh falls off of bone, my emergent personalities seem to collide into one being like many stars becoming a single planet. is this who i am? am i who i want to be? do i have control of this mass of flesh and bone? am i the flesh and bone itself?
am i free?

5: SoBright: 
i cant stop thinking. i will only stop in death. will who i am, or the person i want to be in the shoes of, die before this ever-beating heart in my chest? i felt it easier to answer the question myself by ending the flesh for good on my own terms. so i wouldn't have to see an answer. honestly im afraid. afraid to be free, afraid of mortality. afraid of living, to the point that death feels like a justifiable release to that tension. but i have to keep going. i have a brother that's getting married soon, my mom is coming back in state i need to be there for her when shes back. i have friends I've known long enough to consider family. i have myself, who would look at the all the depression, all that pain created by your own thoughts, and tell you its okay to love yourself. and its okay to move on. 
its okay to be free.

the human engine

09 11 2025 false data

ssshhh.mp3

peano!

Mitigator's Climb

air resistance:pdsva03

vol. 12

kkamiistar - evil // #😥#🎇

J Balvin, Willy William - Mi Gente (TheFloudy & AZVRE Remix) _ TERMINATOR [Chase Scene]

Hedonics - Who Are They (jungle refix)

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vol. 12

bluthat

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