This is an audio bite from a DnD game I'm currently hosting. It's probably obnoxious without any context. Possibly even WITH context.

Lennix

Lenny2

The adventurers free a tiger they've found in a goblin cave. ...This is not a good thing.

YouHearNothing

The adventurers completed the mission, but things have gone poorly in their absence.

VicDroppedTheBall

Ghengis, after taking upon the form of the Bandit Captain, goes to spend some quality time with his lackeys. It's somewhat productive.

TNDnD: Ghengis Dupes Bad Guys

Everyone's Favorite Giant Bomb Royalty-Free song, now on Soundcloud!

This song, of course, is made by Dan Skinner, Adam Skinner and Dave James. Show those folks some love if you dig the song.

Lock Down (Dan Skinner, Adam Skinner, Dave James)

Holiday Songs With Brandon

Birthday

Number One, Sorry!

Let me tell you a story.

A weathered looking woman in a space suit yells over the roar of a massive industrial drill to stop digging. The sound of crushing rock slows, and the drill slowly pulls back revealing an unnaturally deep cavern. The woman calls out for a light, and it's lowered into the pit, illuminating a grand hall covered in alien writing. In the center, there is a raised dias, upon which sits a box made of an exotic metal that reflects the light brilliantly. The woman smiles and absentmindedly rubs her thumb against a ring through the fabric of her gloves.

On the wooden boardwalk of a dusty prospector town a boxy robot wearing religious garb yells at the humans walking by. Demanding that they repent for the sin of killing God. That they should learn from the errors of their ways and embrace humility in the way that the followers of the good faith have. Eventually a deputy comes by and asks them politely to disperse, but not before a fair number of people avert their eyes with guilt.

Four people stand on a darkened stage before a crowd of hundreds of thousands in a enormous stadium. A single spotlight turns on, illuminating one of these people, a man in an extravagant suit with too many teeth in his mouth. With a flourish of their hand they motion to the crowd, saying that their and trillions of voices across the galaxy were heard and that the newest president is... A dramatic pause. You could hear a pin drop. Spotlights shine on another figure as the generously toothed man exclaims the name of Pop Sensation Infinity Sparks. The roar of the crowd is deafening. On a vid screen out in a rural Brekk outpost a colonist grumpily says that they voted for the famed actor Brett Firmbody. They would know how to run a galaxy.

You might ask yourself, "that's not a story, it's a short string of vignettes." ...You wouldn't be wrong. But lemme tell you, when you've been around The Black as much as I have, everything starts seeming connected. Like these events all lead up to some bigger picture out there. So why don't you sit by the fire... And listen.

The Storyteller

Y’all are probably too young to remember but… Well, maybe I’m entirely too old so I do. Anyway, the galaxy used to feel… Empty. A great big space just waiting for Humanity to come along and fill it up. ‘Course, once we started being able to move around in the Black, we found out that wasn’t the case. You got them lifeforms made of crystal, the ones that eat machines to procreate, and you got those ones that just come outta other lifeforms when they die. It makes that old vid series where all the aliens just kinda looked like blue colored people or whatever look comically wrong. 

You know, It’s a little ironic. The old Earth media loved to depict Xenos as monsters, but I haven’t seen any other systems where they reduced an entire planet to an empty shell in pursuit of materials.  It’s real easy to fall on that old adage that says maybe mankind is the real monster.

*sigh* I don’t know. Maybe that’s why the Ur aren’t around anymore. Maybe they knew something we don’t. …I could use a drink.

The Storyteller pt. 2

Host/DM of Tuesday Night D&D, a recorded non-profit game of Dungeons & Dragons 5th edition played by Giant Bomb members.

It's the niche-est of markets.

Brandon Rolston

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