I’ve just accepted this is a rough song, I’m never going to re-record or tweak it due to mental health, so here it is. 
Yes, I know you can barely make out what I’m saying. 
It’s a live recording and I wasn’t using my mic. ☹️

[Lyrics: 
Why have you come if you’re just like the rest? 
 It’s like I don’t learn my lesson, it’s like you’ll always be a liar 
 You’re just like the rest, you’ll hurt me, you’ll hurt me
 Why have you come, if you’re just like the rest?

  You don’t even know my fu- my fucking name. 
  It’s like you have already plan to, plan to use me 
  It’s like you already plan to use 
  I already saw all the signs]

naive

This is from 2020.  I made this in my bed with just my mic and vibes.  The vocals were  intended to just be a joke I send to my friends which explains the very  comedic autotune.  Then it actually became therapeutic.   I rediscovered it on my phone and thought, “oh gosh this needs to be shared with more of my friends and followers.”   You might not find this funny but I find it very funny.  This is apparently the original title of “joke” song as well.  How could I forget such a masterpiece.  Please enjoy,  I put very little effort into it. 🙂

We’re gonna die before I have energy to make this an actual song…

CONTENT WARNING:  Song is about a dissociative state after sex under the influence.  Then, coming down to realize you were taken advantage of.    The song features reversed vocals describing one of my assaults in 2019. 

[Lyrics: 
I’ll come to, I’ll come to. 
Soon

I’m back. 
I’m back!]

The end of of the song my vocals are supposed to be disgust at what has happened and yearning to go back to disassociated state.

afterwards

Song features a voice memo recorded on my phone a month ago. 
This song is about "Favorite Person" in relation to my BPD

split in two/voice memo 5 8-2-19

uhm well its no mozart but theres me going through my mental torments after being too vulnerable with someone. lol this is free, therapy is not.

i take it back?

This track had to be cut into to parts. the song features a voice memo from October 2019 where I'm talking about some intense feelings involving my mental health and abandonment. it then transitions to part 2 of this song which can only be described as "mania" I made every single part of this song myself and spent a week on it don't be brutal.

unreachable: 10-28-19 voice memo part 1

unreachable: part 2

Uh, well it was 5AM, I couldn’t fall back to sleep so I stayed awake playing music? 
Eerie. Perfect for going to the basement to investigate what that sound was.

bad dream

‘Today I spilled blueberries’ is really just about that time I spilled blueberries in my kitchen and thought about someone I deeply care about.

today I spilled blue...

This was apart of my of my live and unedited  recordings archive.  So the song isn’t something that will spark joy for a lot of people in terms of sound quality.  I’m sorry  this song is awful.   I’m sorry for that.  I like expressing myself and hoping people are into it. 

The song is short because you’re always busy. 
And it’s unfinished because I put just as much effort into it as you put into me.

The roughest copy of a song

im trying to do this modern psychedelia, bedroom pop, lazy synth meets my existential paranoia and dissociation. 
P.S I ain’t no sound engineer 😅

brazen