Navigating Relationships as a Christian: Insights from 2 Corinthians 6:14

Question: 
We had a student ask this question, “There’s this girl I like, but she’s not a Christian. I’ve asked her to go to church, but she doesn’t want anything to do with it. She keeps asking me to go out with her, even though I say no. What do I do?”


Answer: 
First of all, there's an implication that the student says they are a Christian.

I think that's an important thing to first distinguish. Like, what is a Christian? A Christian is not a follower of religion, but a Christian is somebody who says that I want to be like Christ, that Jesus is my Savior, and that I desire to be more like him and less like me. 

And that's truly what a Christian is: somebody who is submitted to the Lord as to Jesus as Lord of their life. And so, first thing, if you have this question or a similar question, do you have that heart check within yourself and say, “Am I a follower of Jesus?”

In answering the question at face value, how should you respond if you're a Christian and you have someone who is interested in you, or you're interested in who's not a Christian? 

This is one of those questions that the Bible actually gives a very direct answer to. This one is laid out in 2 Corinthians 6:14 NLT. 
“Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness?”

You might be familiar with another translation, 2 Corinthians 6:14 ESV, where Paul states 

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.”

And so that would be the basic instruction to this question. The first thing you should look for in a potential spouse or somebody you're going to date is that they are a Christian.

As we're talking to youth, there are other challenges here on the timing and direction of the relationship as well. Many times there's pressure from our culture that we need the status of having a boyfriend or a girlfriend. And again, I believe there's another heart check in there, that even if this girl is a Christian, you have to ask yourself and pray, “Is this the right timing for me to be in a dating relationship knowing that God's standard for a relationship would be one that would ultimately lead you towards marriage?

So casual dating, as our culture has it, is just off and is very rarely gonna honor God. Check out 2 Corinthians 6:14 for further insight.

Navigating Relationships as a Christian: Insights from 2 Corinthians 6:14

Dating Non-Believers: A Wise Choice for Christians?

Question:

Can I date a non-Christian or non-believer? 

Answer: 

It seems like this question is coming from a believer, a disciple of Jesus, who wants to follow Him. The question is, "Can I date someone who is not a believer, who is not a Christian?" My answer would be no, as it's not a wise decision and goes against what God's Word teaches us.

There are a couple of things I want you guys to look at. 

2 Corinthians 6:14-15 NLT says: 

"Don't team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil, and how can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?" 

It's evident here, as Paul writes this inspired by the Holy Spirit, that he's emphasizing the challenge of being in a partnership or relationship with a non-believer. Considering this in your own life, why would you want to date someone who is not a believer?

You might have feelings and attraction towards that person, and there may be great qualities about them. However, if Jesus is truly the Lord of your life and the center of your life, and if you desire to follow Him and center your life around Him, why would you want to enter into a close and intimate relationship with someone who doesn't share those same values or prioritize the things of the Lord?

And so, as Paul would say, he just asks these questions. "What harmony can there be between a Christ and the devil, and how can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?" 

Even in a dating relationship, the principle of being unequally yoked applies. Just as it's unwise to enter into a marriage with a non-believer, the same applies to dating. A dating relationship is special and involves a closer connection than other types of relationships. You want to be heading in the same direction as your partner. If they are headed toward worldly pursuits rather than toward Christ, their life will likely follow that direction, too. It's not wise, doesn't honor the Lord, and sets you up for potential failure, heartache, and pain.

Another verse I'd like to share is from Amos 3 NLT in the Old Testament. Amos, a prophet, poses a simple yet profound question that's worth pondering as you consider who you want to date and the relationships you want to pursue.

 "Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?" 

So, think about the direction of your life. Is your life headed in the direction of growing in the Lord, serving the Lord, living for the Lord, laying your life down for the Lord? If your life is directed towards Christ, the person you're dating or pursuing a relationship with must also be headed in the same direction. Otherwise, how can you really walk together? How can you really have a relationship? 

I hope that answers your question. How can you walk together without agreeing on a direction? And if you don't agree on who Jesus Christ is in your life, how can there be a relationship?

To Listen to more or ask your own questions, click here: https://youtu.be/CFwnzM-AEvw

Navigating Relationships as a Christian: Insights from 2 Corinthians 6:14

Calvary Youth

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