lyrics //

I spent so much time
Trying to rewind
Undo the things I made up
Into pre packaged lies
There’s not much left now
Past the point to ask how
It feels like the cycle is 
Coming to an end

I cried over you
Longer than I knew
It’s takes thick armor to fight
The war I knew with you
There’s not much left now
Past the point to bow down
It feels like a white flag
Has been raised in this town

Is this what you planned
And you call yourself a man
Slowly bleed me out to dry
Just to make up for time
There’s not much left now
Past the point to break down
It feels like all we built is burning
Just to keep us warm 

And I’m so thankful that you’re gone

I hope you’re happy now
With your furrowed brow
Learning it’s not all about you
Pull your head down from the clouds
There’s not much left now
Past the point to drown
I’ll keep my head above the sea
To show you I am strong

And I’m so thankful that you’re gone

Maxxemus 

You're Gone (Thanksgiving Song)

Lyrics //

It’s been a whole year since
I was forced to do this on my own
Didn’t think I’d still be here 
Decorating the Christmas tree alone
And it’s a good thing I bought an extra bottle of wine
I’ll drink to finding myself through the night

You’ve probably turned yourself around
You act like you care about it now
Bet you built her something nice
A gift that comes without a price 
And it’s so cold
To think that you were my world

I'm getting used to holidays, walking through the front door alone
But my family’s been so nice about making me feel at home
And it’s a good thing, that they’re still all I have
Wouldn’t trade a thing just to have you back

You’ve probably turned yourself around
You act like you care about it now
Bet you built her something nice
A gift that comes without a price 
And it’s so cold
To think that you were my world

Though most of the year was filled with tears 
It’s the ones around me that got me here
And I can’t complain about losing love 
When I’ve gained much more than I can hold
And it’s so full
To think that this is my world

12.25.21 Laid

I can't count the times you belittle yourself
but I can count the circles around your eyes
and my jacket smelled like you just from lying on your floor
and I hate the thought of leaving
I hate the thought of leaving

you can only convince yourself for so long that you're somebody else's someone
and if I can't save myself then I can't save you 
but it's alright if you just let me love you
let me love you

I'm not quite sure what you always had in mind
with every breath we're running out of time
it doesn't take long to miss you whenever you're gone
and I hate the thought of leaving
I hate the thought of leaving

you can only convince yourself for so long that you're somebody else's someone
and if I can't save myself then I can't save you 
but it's alright if you just let me love you
let me love you

I guess I can't say that you didn't warn me
said you'd push me away before morning
my hands are shaking but I swear it's just the cold
and I hate the thought of you leaving
I hate the thought of you leaving

you can only convince yourself for so long that you're somebody else's someone
and if I can't save myself then I can't save you 
but it's alright if you just let me love you
let me love you

If Anything

I'm racking my brain until there's nothing left
I burnt my leg with a cigarette

window rolled down and it's raining on me 
but I don't really care just let it drown me

I hate you but I loved you and I hate that I still love you
after how you couldn't love me
I guess I was always waiting for you to leave

you bent my bones backwards and they grew back crooked
I never knew a love that wasn't something wicked

window rolled down and its raining on me
but I dont really care just let it drown me

I hate you but I loved you and I hate that I still love you
after how you couldn't love me
I guess I was always waiting for you to leave

still never got an answer as to why you left 
so I keep telling myself you couldn't handle it
but what does that mean 
I don't know what to think

I hate you but I loved you and I hate that I still love you
after how you couldn't love me
I guess I was always waiting for you to leave

Pavement

I can finally wear your shirt again because the scent wore off 
and I wish I wouldn't even think to put it on but it's all I've got
and it feels good to know you aren't doing ok 
but trust me god I hate myself for feeling that way

I told you I was scared to have my heart broken
I told you it over and over again
you said if it ended not to worry cause we could still be friends
how could you do this to me
how could you do this to anyone, anyone you let in

you always acted like I was someone else
putting words into my mouth until it all bleed out
you made me think I was crazy for finally doing something right
well fuck you I might be but at least I even tried

I told you I was scared to have my heart broken
I told you it over and over again
you said if it ended not to worry cause we could still be friends
how could you do this to me
how could you do this to anyone, anyone you let in

when we first met you never gave up on the pursuit
until you saw something in me that mirrored you
I told you I was hesitant to start anything over again but who really isn't

I told you I was scared to have my heart broken
I told you it over and over again
you said if it ended not to worry cause we could still be friends
how could you do this to me
how could you do this to anyone, anyone you let in

camilletharp