This is a song for crybabies, sensitive souls, melancholy hotties, and sad b's of all kinds. Feeling and healing. Music for shadow work. Also the first track I've recorded in six years. 

Instrumental from the YouTube Audio Library, Aviated by Nana Kwabena, slightly tweaked for my own purposes.

Lyrics:

Sad bitches can be bad bitches too
There is beauty in the way you allow your pain to bloom and die
To the cycles of life you stay true
And that tear-stained face, it shines when you cry
Baptizing your worn soul anew
When that holy water starts dripping from your eyes
No vision is more clear than you
With an open heart, you see through all lies

Sensitivity is strength if you would lean into it
It'll show you everything can have a meaning to it
Oh somebody did you wrong? Well unfortunately, that's their right
And now it's time to move on, keep the future in your sight

Discernment is the key to unlocking your intuition
And vulnerability is mandatory in the mission
Have those boundaries to keep you safe when love is missing
Forgive yourself and release when you get too caught up in wishing

Heart breaks, but never let them turn it to stone
And watch those cracks in it slowly start to filling with gold
And watch your scars shimmer every time you step into sight
Sad bitch is STILL HERE, a bad bitch 'cause you FIGHT

Working in the shadows is unpleasant and a risk
Tricky keeping balance where light and dark coexist
So no, you don't have to smile, nothing wrong with breaking down
Healing has a rhythm, the joy will come back around.

Okay...

Sad Bitches Can (Be Bad Bitches Too)

Sad Bitches

LAMENT 
/lə-mĕnt′/
intransitive verb
:To express grief for or about; mourn.
:To regret deeply; deplore.
:To grieve audibly; wail.
:To express sorrow or regret.
noun
:A feeling or expression of grief; a lamentation.
:A song or poem expressing deep grief or mourning.

In the past year and a half I have written a stack of poems, verses, and songs processing the pain and lessons of a failed relationship. Here's the saddest one.

LYRICS:
I’m not sure what's worse,
Thinking I deserve this, or knowing I don't
Wishing you would come back, or hoping you won’t
Knowing that nothing between us two will ever be anywhere near the same
Or knowing how easy it would have been to correct course and change

Avoidable outcomes, and avoidable pain
"You can’t maintain a relationship alone" was what I’d always say
Without honesty you have nothing and it’ll always be that way
Whether or not you learned that lesson well is not for me to know or tell

In an instant you became a stranger
I went from feeling safe and warm with you, to knowing I was in danger
And I could see the truth all on your face 
But all I know is trying harder, all I know is giving grace

Commitment means commitment right? I can’t be dumb for thinking that
If there’s a problem you communicate you plan and you attack
It’s us against it all, that’s how a partnership’s supposed to be  
But for some reason, you always thought that you were versus me

I gave too much, I gave too long, I gave too soon
And believed despite in hindsight a sad increasing lack of proof 
I handed you the wheel and let you steer us straight into our doom
You pushed away my love til only hurt and fear were in the room

You were a coward, I know, cause I was a coward too
I didn't want to trust myself when it meant not trusting you
I didn’t want to let go although you were clearly halfway out the door
I just wanted you to admit you lied, I wanted so much more

I let you play with my heart, I let you make me feel so small
Served myself up on a platter, let you pick the bones and all 
I let you take advantage of my body and my mind
I let you devour so much of my energy, my time

Commitment means commitment right? I can’t be dumb for thinking that
If there’s a problem, you communicate you plan and you attack
It’s us against it all that’s how a partnership’s supposed to be  
But for some reason, you always thought that you were versus me

So many things you told me and probably don’t even remember
Are echoing in my head haunting me for now and ever
Did you mean it when you said I was your wisdom, was your home?
That you wanted to build a life with me and watch me grow old?

You always hoped that I’d remain a significant part of your life
I had the important qualities that you desired in a wife
It was “no matter what happens, I’ll be riding with you”
Then it was “I’m staying with her, and it doesn’t matter what you do”

…I can’t be dumb for thinking that
If there’s a problem, you communicate you plan and you attack
It’s us against it all that’s how a partnership’s supposed to be
But for some reason you always thought that you were versus me

Commitment means commitment right? I must be dumb for thinking that
There was a problem, no communication/plan but you attacked
It's us against it all, that’s how a partnership’s supposed to be  
But for some reason you always thought-

___
Instrumental: Breakup by Din0

Lament

October 2025 feels. It's spooky season ain't it?

Beat is "Hide Out" by ‪JECHO FKA DustyB

LYRICS:
I drive an '04 Civic
And I actually like my job
Don’t really get paid enough
But the work is worth my time 

I'm getting to know my dad now 
Last year we lost my mom
My heart was broke before
And now it’s frozen solid 

I wake up new each day
And curse my opened eyes
I'm grateful for so much
Still pissed that I'm alive

My luck is fucking bad
I'm blessed beyond belief
I'm strong and flexible
I'm losing all my teeth 

My clothes don't fit me right
Lately I’m swimming in 'em
Depleted of all trust, but
My self-loathing’s at the brim

Why am I even here? 
To give until it hurts?
I bless another's life
My plate is filled with dirt 

I hunger for the sun
My appetite is dead
I'm stuffed from swallowing 
the darkness that pours from my head

I'm marked and hollering about it 
while bleeding out in bed
But i have come this far
I will get up again

Every breath is a gift
Every breath is a burden
All i have left is hope
The pen, the page, the words

I will never measure up
I have always been enough
A raging god, an ant, 
A cracked and overflowing cup

Been kicked and punched and shoved and 
Slapped right into growing up
I’m trapped and on my goddamn back
But I keep showing up

I can’t say I’m that different
I can’t say that I’m the same
But I can’t forget their voices
And I can’t get out this stain…

LIFE UPDATE

"in a half-lit basement spitting blood on beats"

CQA