an ode to 2017-2018 :)

I’ve held my tongue for way too long, I don’t know how to fight
But I’m not in the position I was in when we found my mind
I constructed whatever hell I’m in right now
And been stuck in this place for god knows how long now

I’m sorry shit ain’t goin your way, but I promise you I feel worse
I’m sorry that you’re limited by somethin else, but I couldn’t be fucked

It’s all so simple, all so great, it’s all so in front of you right?
It never worked out for me like that (x2)

ay it never worked for me like that (x4)
it’s all so simple

I know I’m apathetic, but I’m stuck inside myself
And all I can do is watch in horror as I wreak-
Everyone I know, they hate me, they don’t know
But one day their true colors will just show

I’m sorry shit ain’t goin your way, but I promise you I feel worse
I’m sorry that you’re limited by somethin else, but I couldn’t be fucked

It’s all so simple, all so great, it’s all so in front of you right?
It never worked out for me like that (x2)

Worse

Spotify

lyrics:
please say something
i'm bleeding out
i'm not who you thought i was
and that disturbs you greatly

i'm bothered by myself
i'm bothered by you too
take me for example
it's not always about you.

-------------------------

more music in 2024 :)
thanks for stickin around

love,
eric :)

It's Not Always About You

lyrics:
how will you come home?
i lost too much this year
to deal with this appropriately
i see...

i see
you're not here
you're not coming back...

home

-----------------------

[inspired by: https://soundcloud.com/maison_hermes/carino]

++++++++++++++++++++

today has been very strange to say the least...

love,
eric checks <3

Walked Out

lyrics:

wait for night, the sound
way, don’t know
i’m praying for nothing
nothing at all

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

...heavily inspired by quannnic

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR PATIENCE!
[[HARM.2//SOON]]

**SPOTIFY, APPLE MUSIC, ETC. RELEASE SOON**

NOTHING AT ALL.

vocals by me. 
(don't expect rap vocals from me ever again though lol)

when you can't take it anymore two
coming july 17th.

These Are The Results

Daisies

sample | https://soundcloud.com/idl3times/left-on-read-prod-idole
[please go follow Coast, he's an incredibly underrated vocalist/producer]

thank you.
just...
thank you.

Buy on iTunes

Sleeping

Scattered/Bed of Roses (feat. Rook)

you don't think i know what you've done.
but i know it all.
you think you're so stealthy.
but you have nowhere to run no more.
you don't think i know what you've done.
i wish you wouldn't play me for a fool.
you think that you know everything i don't.
that only worsens the blow.

somebody had to do it.
harsh noise.
fuck you.

YOU DON'T THINK I KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE?

You Don’t Think I Know What You’ve Done?

vocals by @checksnbalances
produced by @ventingpalace + @checksnbalances
(sample | novo amor - colourway)

No one ever answered my prayers, so I let go of my false faith
I’ve hoped for better for a while now, but negativity remains where i bathe
I wish that you'd stop clawing at me, your messages are digging into me
I wish that i’d start blaming myself, lest I cause any more damage to my mental health
Home
All i can do now is run
Home
All i can do now is hide

Mirage (co-prod. Venting Palace)

3/1/2018.
Rest In Peace.

i can only apologize for every year that went by
filled with hatred towards me
caused by turmoil
cause of tormenting, tormenting i didnt mean to cause
i dont want to be the one you remember when you're gone
but... but really i'd want you to leave knowing that i never meant any harm
im sorry if im acting like a burden now
i just want to stay with you

but life doesnt want you to stay
no life doesnt want you to stay
life doesnt want to see me in anything but dismay
life doesnt want you to stay
no life doesnt want to stay
ill miss you every day, in every way, every way

I Love You, I’ll Miss You.

nothing's comin of me
nothing's comin of me in this next year
nothing's comin of me
and when it fuckin does it's gonna be a wave of tears
grail of tears type shit, y'all already know what it is
cause i know that i've been left out of the equation entirely
even though i'm supposed to be the main focus

downpour

(you don't know what's happenin, you ain gonna be ready for this shit)

no one's gonna hear ya
no one's gonna think about you in a year
no one's gonna hear ya
and when they fuckin do, it's gonna be too late
found the body, there it is, damn it's fuckin mutilated
whatever, it's fine, move on, he's gone
it don't matter to me anymore, not like he ever had a fuckin purpose

downpour

PERMILLE - EP

Downpour

nahhhh yall dont need lyrics, the hook is the only important part lol

inspired by: https://soundcloud.com/glocomply/if-i-leave

(love yall <333)

Enemy

you're so stuck
and no one cares enough
to get you out
to help you break free
(no, no) they couldn't be bothered

i see

(ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo)

i see right through you, i see right through you

Your Friends Don't Care

Your Friends Don’t Care

dear [OMITTED],

don't come looking for me... okay?

thanks,
eric
_______________________________________
lyrics:

When I go missing don’t come looking for me
Just let it ride as a breaking news story
If you love me you’ll stay home and wait around
Because I’ll be off the grid before this day is out

I’m leaving you behind
Another world, another life I hope to find
You meant so little to me
That I felt nothing when I decided that I would leave

This is goodbye
And no, I won’t apologize

Goner

featuring @idl3times

I can't bear with leaving you
The ruse, yeah you saw it through
I can tear through memories with you
My heart has officially been split into two
I cannot bear with leaving you
The disguise, yeah you saw it through
I can rip myself apart and let chaos ensue
My heart has officially been split into two

Heartbreak (feat. 97.coast)

Heartbreak (feat. 97 Coast)

we've sealed the deal.
produced by me.

original: https://soundcloud.com/bruhmanegoddd/wrath-attraction-prod-ak?si=5d8298caaf4e435e849fe9985b8c5efc&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

<333

love,
eric

Wrath Attraction (Bruhmanegod Cover)

Scarlet was her room
A place of privacy now tells a tale of gloom
Seemingly splattered carelessly, so hazardously
She had no purpose here, so who’s to say this is a tragedy?

Hope to spot red rain roll down your cheeks one day
Soon you’ll learn to accept your purpose is to drown and decay
You’ve proven that you’re a cold-hearted cunt, harlot
Cannot wait for the day that you and all your loved ones are covered in scarlet

happy valentines day!

(sample: https://soundcloud.com/greaveme/eastsound)

love,
eric

Scarlet

Winter Break (feat. Bruhmanegod)

(yes, the title used to be the other way around lol)

lyrics:
dark circles lurk beneath my lower eyelids
as the world as i know it crumbles to rubble around me
nothing but trouble will ever come from me
no one but evil ones will ever cross my weary gaze

i don't wanna do this shit no more
said that way too many times before
bitch, i don't wanna do this no more
i'm tired of all this shit, i'm tired of all this shit

i'm tired of all you people, all you fictional characters
tryna run around and talk about all this bullshit
tired of yelling, tired of yelling, tired of y'all motherfuckers
IT'S THE SAME SHIT EVERY DAY, BUT A DIFFERENT FILTER.

It Never Ends (Unwell)

Unwell (It Never Ends)

if i thought there was something that i could say
to salvage this you know i would
though the words may not be here today
if you think you wanna wait you should
there you were, waiting patiently for a sign
there i was, wonderin if i'll ever find

the right voice, the right thought, the right path
i'm so lost
the right voice, the right thought, the right path
i'm too exhausted

(this song is just about being tired of constant mental clutter n shit of that sort... yfm???)

:):):):):):):):):):):)

love,
eric :)

Lost

"Whatever"
Vocals & Production by Checks + Blckk

Verse 1: @blckk | https://twitter.com/BLCKK_0
Verse 2: @checksnbalances | https://twitter.com/checkspermille

[lyrics will be posted soon {or never idk}]

(btw, we waited almost a year to drop this one... oops lmao)

ep soon <333

love,
eric :)

Whatever

WHATEVER w/ BLCKK

Instrumentals 1

Departure

(intro)
do not come around me
i want 20 more epiphanies to come and go
what they mean, i'll never know
you’re lack of empathy is astounding
i’m fixin myself right quick,
though you wouldn’t care to know

(hook)
you only care when it’s convenient
think I’ve fuckin lost it? you ain seen shit
you only give a fuck if I go public
what am I to you? can’t tell no more,
1: that’s fine, you can get-
(repeat hook)
2: that’s fine, you can get cut, shit

thank you all very much for making this year so great!
see you all in 2020!

love,
eric :)

Epiphanies

removing all toxicity from my life.
this has been a long time coming.

lyrics:

[hook]
snipped them strings now imma need you to step way back
don’t go shoutin bout a twisted script because I did not say that
admit your defeat because u can no longer control me, bitch stay mad
this for every single second of hell that you put me through, I call it payback

[v1]
it’s about time for this regression to conclude
from all fuckery and abuse feel like I been unglued
you thinkin that you better just because you said you are
if you wanna why know u not I could give a whole seminar
didn’t think I would see thru it motherfucker
nitpickin every move I made, like u was undercover
before now I felt caged in, always had to suffer
but this is payback bitch so you better run for cover

(hook)

[v2]
I give another chance only to get fucked to over
gonna cut you off without the possibility of closure
don’t apologize, you only sorry because you got caught
do not think for a single second that you getting off scot-
free, I wanna witness you try to wiggle your way outta this one
0 reddit gold make dat so peabrain oh so pissed, scum
is what you are, and never tell me you regret it
brand my name into your forehead so that you never forget it

(hook x2)

Payback

original: https://soundcloud.com/sybyr/get-it-off-me

prod. https://soundcloud.com/lordlandfill (all chops + adjustments by me)

if u understand the joke i made 4 seconds in hmu cuz we both degenerates.

haven't slept in 3 days.
no corny shit, this is how it feels.

anyways, i love u guys!
lots of new music coming this week <33333

love,
eric checks :)

Get Cut ('Sybyr - Get It Off Me' Remix)

Where Did You Go?

made this in a couple hours, hope u like and always remember to love urself :)

i love myself :)

i hope you enjoy! please be safe out there and always remember that you are loved :)

love,
eric checks <333

I've Let You Down

;)

[lyrics]

i'm really in love with you
is really all i can say
we don't fight any night
and we don't wish for better days

i simply cannot disguise
that overwhelming love you often hide
but i see it through the way your eyes-
she said i'm the best she's ever had and i said "darlin, you gon make me cry"

get outta bed, spry
right up at 5, cuz i'm
a little bit of an early bird, which you never seemed to mind
(x2)

i love you...

...you can't...

________________________________________

thought i'd finally drop this one :)

+EP soon!

Infatuated

HARM.2//SOON

@MFNF

all inquiries: ericchecks@gmail.com

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