we're so high, feel the wind ruffle your bow ties, looking pretty in pink, don't you try to change a single thing about your life cause youre too nice.

there's no time, dripping down the tin, let your slow lies creep through your grin, but they're too wise to the guise of your sins, then the flames rise, they're so high

you're too shy as you breathe out smoke, you say goodbye to the boy you know but you're too blind and you lose control of the limelight, and your appetite.

it's too cold, you're walking home and you're now too old, and you lost your glow, you miss those slow nights, where friends would show up and you'd all cry, cause you're tongue tied. 

acrophobe

realize, come feast your eyes
I'm all held back, is this a sign of the times?
it's 2 AM, I should be getting to bed
now it's 5 AM, I should be craning my neck.

try to visualize the colors on your walls
is it in your mind? was that room there at all?
tell me friend, are you in your cloud?
or is this hell, and we're just upside down?

I feel ashamed
I feel the shame
I don't wanna play games
I feel insane

come with me, come and be my friend now
watch tv, come the world is ending now
mp3, let's listen to some tunes now
here baby, let's make it to the moon now

realize, come feast your eyes
I'm all held back, is this a sign of the times?

upside down

Wander With Me

All My Friends Have Gone To War

Tell me dear. If I had found the way into your heart, would you let me in?
Hold me dear cause I just cried myself to sleep at night and I don't know why.
And though I don't remember how we met, and god I hope I don't forget your name,

you're forever in my heart till death may do us part.
You're forever in my heart till death may do us part.

Let me rest my head, on your shoulder till I'm dead
and let me make amends for a life I couldn't comprehend.

This is a waltz, this is a waltz. 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, this is a waltz.
Hold your applause and hold me while you're at it.
I'm wearing your smile, you're wearing my jacket.

tell me dear, you must.
While there's no one here but us.
How could something as sharp as a knife,
give meaning to all my life?

How could somebody who sins as much as he breaths.
Who shatters more hearts than he has teeth.
Who closes his eyes cause there's nothing to see.
leave me be my darling, run.

Or stay right here with me,
I'm sorry in advance.
But if I could my love,
let me have this dance.

Let Me Have This Dance

a midnight study

who are the sacred ones that keep on keeping on in all this mass confusion?
who are the holy ones that shouldn't be alive? they're giving up the wrong conclusions. 

giving up.

this is your wake up call to arms.
bring you back, no hurt, no harm.

We are the broken guns, set fire to our tongues. no words you'll ever comprehend.
they're breaking down the door, but we're all waiting for the end, it's always the end.
giving up.

mood

Your hands were always smaller than the naked eye could see
but your heart kept growing larger, exponentially.
I'm a shell of who I used to be, myself and I and me,
But I hope they read my story, and I hope so selfishly.

If you're free tonight, stay a little while.
I'll sing you all your favourite songs.
I'll do my best to get along with you.
I'll right my wrongs with you.

Heaven better have a place,
cause you're not another pretty face.

I had a dream just the other day.
I didn't know if it was wrong or ok to see you there, 
unaware of every passing thought, to every thing I've got to show you.
God I hope I get to know you.

Just breathe and give a little time,
to stay a little a while.

stay

and he said i know

Those were the times
I can't rewind
When we were young
And you were mine

I'll pass it off
As long as I can
But I can't get
You out of my head

I'm all alone
Inside this room
My body is weak
 and it wants you

I'll try to make
The most of it
But something is wrong

Oh
Oh no
Oh here we go again
It's my fault

Oh
Oh no
Oh there you go again
It's your fault

And I can't take much more of this

Good-bye, baby
You're no good for me

Good-bye, baby
You're not coming back to me

goodbye baby - the walters

e a s y d o e s i t.

i really dont care anymore... this time.

lets zone out

The devil is in my veins,
there's no sense in what he makes of me, or in what I'm saying.   

Love gave me away,
nothing else to feel, nothing else but pain.

Now my devil's crying,
now my devil's dying
underneath the guise of sorrow, my devil is insane.

Held beneath the devil's daughter,
a child she screams, a boy he slaughtered,
nothing left to lose, and nothing else to gain.

the devils daughter

wanna cry

crying in my bed
dying in my head
making it much harder on my friends
to stay until the end

it makes no sense why i'm tense
building fences all around.

i don't want no meds
have some more she said
can i have a bullet in my head
id rather that instead

it makes no sense why you're tense
i'm a nice guy all around 

where's the smile?
where's the smile?
where's your smile?
is it gone?

where's the smile?
where's the music?
where are you?
 are you dead? 

I wanna run away 
get me out this place
I wanna make a change
i'm running in my place

so close your eyes
i'm feeling shy
cause i'm naked all around

i'm holding on the best I can
but i don't understand
why i got a hundred thousand plans
and nothing goes as planned 

Just tear my eyes out
Just tear my eyes out
Just tear my eyes out

where's the smile?
where's the smile?
where's your smile?
is it gone?

where's the smile?
where's the music?
where are you?
 are you dead?

are you dead

as the end approaches
and i lie here in wait
as they watch with disappointment 
at the mess that i've made
i'm just another mistake
with all this hate i create
and if there is a god above me
there's a lot  on his plate

breathe
no im damned on this earth
breathe
to hurt and to hurt
and if there is a god above me that's been watching since birth
then give me one good reason, tell me what it's worth.
if there's just one good reason, tell me what it's worth

bed-ridden, tears dripping, locked in my room
downswing, aching flowers dont bloom
there's not much i can take if i take it at all
leave me alone now im crying in blue

i used to be a dancer yeah i used to swing
i used to comfort people yeah i used to sing
but now my voice is the devil
my music his horns
and my friends are dead
from this world we are torn

wont you take me away 
----------------------------------------
im writing disease till the day im deceased 
begging you please wont you listen at least
love in decrease heeding the priest's decrees
with ease is the only way to feel peace

but nothing makes sense no more,
my eyes, heart and brain are sore.
love's a bitch love's a whore
cant take this anymore

oh lord take me in, 
wash away all my sins
and deliver me from evil
and let me begin

the end

(I'm not ok.)

I'm a dreamer, so let me go.
secret keeper, just let me know.
have faith in me, know that I can be strong.
just give me your heart, and I can belong
give me your heart, and I'll belong.

Lady bird, hold me tight
stay with me, all through the night.
this empty nest can't take more.
so hold your breath, the darkness and light.

Meet me in the forest, splash me with water from the river below.
tell me it's okay, tell me I'm pretty and that nobody knows.

I want it, I want it, I want to be me
I want it, I want it, I want to be free
I want it, I want it, I want to be me
just let me be.

The depth of despair doesn't scare me at all
sometimes no one's there, sometimes I hate it all
but knowing you're with me it feels like a breeze
knowing you're with me I'm finally free
I know that you're scared and that nothing compares
to that hurt that you feel of knowing it's real
of knowing that the world may not give you a chance
but darling here I am, give me this dance.

The Depth Of Despair

The Depth of Despair

I used to believe in fairy-tales,
but I don't anymore.
I walk on eggshells, walk by myself.
I dance alone this time.

I used to love someone,
I'd hold them in my arms,
but I won't anymore.
love, is kindness and it's pain,
it's driving me insane.
do I live for it this time?

although it's 4 am I'm sleeping on the couch and I miss you,
that doesn't mean I'm laying around crying all day, and night.
it's true, right now I would give anything to kiss you, on your lips.
but you better believe that everything is gonna be alright.

winter days, give me a sign.
give me a friend to pass the time.
mom, it's okay, I'll be okay, I'll be alright,
everything is fine, it's all nice,
just take a breath and close your eyes.

a little loose

it baffles me how someone could just plant a tree, and leave it be 
in reverie or in loneliness it makes no sense to me

if winter came with freezing weather, who's to blame for dying feathers but you?
you left it with no name

now summer's here and no one's near to play around in the atmosphere
why the hell's no one here?

I bought this seed cause I need a friend
I'll only ask for him to end this loneliness.

I broke the floor, dug a hole through the ceiling
so grow some more.
and I dont mean to be mean but please
can I call you "my own mess"?

cause my own mess is my business and don't you mess with "my own mess".
cause "my own mess" will grow some more and punch a hole through your front door.

sometimes, I have these moments...  [and I don't care if you don't believe me] where I fall in love with myself, and everything
and everyone else disappears [where are you?] and there's nothing 
to think about or care about [where are you?] just me and the beauty of it all and sometimes that's the only thing keeping 
me going [but I need you.]

I'll never figure it out.

tree

am I scary? or is it just easier to leave?
ordinary? It's not easy to be me, it's bittersweet, truly.
it's in my head, isn't it? have I felt this way before?
I don't understand, it won't fit. Can't say I love you anymore.
it's uncalled for. I hit the floor.

can't you hear me?
won't you feel me?
don't you leave me.
your silence is deafening.

kisses on my skin leave permanent bruises, they hurt,
but so does love, it's not enough, oh no.
I'll listen yet, even if it breaks my bones or the words wear me out, you wear me out.
I'm a let-down, come now.

Silence Is Deafening

the 1st of april and I dont feel stable,
i thought we were cool, turns out im a fool

now i feel helpless, take you off my checklist
its getting kinda crazy youre making me

hate everything in myself
and god knows im kicked out of heaven and hell
my lies sound too crazy and so does your truth
so baby im begging you im begging you

why's my heart still beating
dont want you to see this
to see me turning into
someone who used to know you

i feel like im losing
my breath like in the movies
i need you to hold me
i need you to

tell me how to save myself
from all the demons i thought i knew well
my lips are still quivering
my knees are so weak 
so darling dont leave me be dont leave me be

april fools

do you still remember why i don't sing?
do you still romanticize every single thing?
cause i don't.
is there anything worse than feeling alone?

i call myself names cause i'm my own bully
that's never gonna change but you don't have to worry
when you're in a state like mine
it'll sure as hell be so easy to lose track of time.

here's some nonsense,
you never speak of loved ones who passed in the past tense. my smile glows more when i'm on the floor, it's not pretense. i've got no more spare underwear i confess. my home, my love, my life has been nothing short of a mess. for the past couple days chewing gum has been my toothpaste. i'm never winning this race, against all that's within my face. 


nothing more to say.
i don't feel okay.

put me where they put the bones

Although I believe in second chances, true romance and some concept of a God, I still think it's rather odd and a little scary to be determined and alive when I could barely just survive.

So hold me dear and hold me dearly, I only merely dread to be alone, my head and heart, they've grown so far apart, it aches my skin and breaks my bones. if you ponder leaving, please just don't.

I'm only calling cause you feel like a friend, and I don't want this to end no I don't want this to end
So hear me out and hear me well, I'm almost drowning can't you tell. I'm burning in this hell.

So close my eyes, and tell me lies and help me breathe. And hug my soul that's underneath.

I remember all the good times and the bad and all the things that made you sad. Please believe I'm still glad you're on this Earth, and though I wish I'm by your side, I find myself in hiding.

From the people whom I've wronged, whom I long for and I'd die for and the fact they'll never know attracts all sorts of ghosts, between myself and I, it's always you I miss the most

this was supposed to be the other way around

There's something here for everyone.
Thank you for making me who I am. 

colourblind_chameleon

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