here's the first single off our new cover EP "not mine, for you, through the years" - stellate, by samia. <3

~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, keys/synths, bass, drums/percussion, programming/processing

Alana Margolis, Anna Chevalier, Isadora Decker-Lucke, Joshua Kern, Sumner Erhard, & Will Hitch sang on the choruses <3

Recorded, produced, engineered, mixed, & mastered at The Astuary from Aug - Nov 2021.

Stellate (Samia cover)

~lyrics~

the silence speaks:
“you’ll be buried sullen and empty.”
your family’s shame
kept beside you at all times.

it’s the same battered resolve.

the soil behaves
as if you’re finally loving again.
the leaves decay
atop the envy we knew you’d repressed.

now, you are all that you hate.

on some hazy day,
when your return swallows me whole,
i’ll know to speak
in ways the summer couldn’t defend.

the silence heaves:
“leave your resentment where it belongs.”

did you catch the light through the cracks?

~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, keys, synths, bass, drums, programming/sampling/processing

Darby Cicci - Trumpet

Produced, engineered, recorded, & mixed at The Astuary by Ben Pisano from Oct 2021 - Aug 2022
Trumpet recorded & engineered remotely by Darby Cicci

Mastered by Joe Lambert

Song & words by Ben Pisano

Cover photo by Madi Heath

Design by Ben Pisano

The Torchbearer

~lyrics~

“if i should say less,
would that leave you wanting more?”
“is that what you learned
against your parents’ door?”

a child of white noise
and mirrors painted over.
we fucked up when
we collared our old lives.

it’s hard to swallow
all the bloodlust.
a door forced open,
like teeth to tile.
a tempest.

“did you guess we’d
tear one another to shreds?
is that why you spend your time
tearing up your skin instead?”

“you thought me gleaming,
a flash behind your eyes.
i think it fair that
i deny myself that pride.”

i am playing
out an old dream:
a row of egrets;
your father spoke of
sympathy

a bird leans in close,
it whispers something
of scarcely tempered rage.
i speak it back to you;
you’re silent.

in the backseat, both
our first and last times,
i didn’t mean to make our bed,
but god, i feel cold as i lie in it.

~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, keys, synths, bass, drums, programming/sampling/processing

Ryan Bannigan - Aux. synth

Produced, recorded, & mixed by Ben Pisano

Mastered by Joe Lambert

Song & words by Ben Pisano

Kept

Egret

~lyrics~

i pull my left hook hard again
i hock my “right way” out and then
i took the wrong way out again
i feed it back and bleed a friend

“is it a fault that you try to pin
on everyone that you’ve ever lost?
would you force it until it fits?
is it the blood rush that you love?”

now, i am stunted and blind.
would i have made any other choice?

i pull my left hook hard again
i hock my “right way” out and then
i took the wrong way out again
i feed it back and bleed a friend

i cut my loss as a good man does
tease it out until the feeling comes
i cut as close as you know to look
it’s just as much what you know i took

~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, synths, bass, programming/sampling/processing

Sumner Erhard - Drums

Anna Panella - Trombone

Bridget Hartman - Saxophone

Produced, recorded, & mixed by Ben Pisano

Mastered by Joe Lambert

Song by Ben Pisano & Sumner Erhard, words by Ben Pisano

Ludlow

~lyrics~

what does it take to get there?
you’re on the roof, arms stretched wide
safe alone, cradled by the afternoon
all your friends called you up

wrap the streets around your newfound headglow
born of asphalt and its callous disregard
warped and faded as you retrace all your steps
is it just like you remember?

you know you must wait to know your place
at the end of the hall, arms stretched wide
is it enough to know they care?
all your friends hoist you up.

hold your head high ‘till it hits the mattress hard
trust your favorite signs that it will be alright
warm and fading as you finally get your rest
is it just like you remember?

you can’t have it any other way,
but you know you would do it all over
just to catch that glimmer again.

~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, keys, synths, bass, programming/sampling/processing

Ryan Bannigan - Drums

Anna Panella - Trombone

Bridget Hartman - Saxophone

Produced, recorded, & mixed by Ben Pisano

Mastered by Joe Lambert

Song & words by Ben Pisano

Seraph

Palindrome

~lyrics~

it’s after we’ve lied about
having gone to sleep
i desperately repeat:
“you are not my missing piece.”

but if it’s peace i want then
how do i surrender
your gilded sighs, your grip, and
the crook of your neck?

how ageless is the want
to plunge headfirst in the water;

the surge of feeling like
you’re held by something bigger?

and i’ve tried to starve my need
to be led by the hand
to who i’m meant to be.

if i could be still you know
i would. besides, it’s easier to lie.
and when i lift my arms above my head
i pray that i am lifted instead.

defenestrated
by a force unseen
oh believer, is it
ever really up to me?

how ageless is the want
to plunge headfirst in the water;

the surge of feeling like
you’re held by something bigger?

and i’ve tried to starve my need
to be led by the hand
to who i’m meant to be.

~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, synths, drums, programming/sampling/processing

Sumner Erhard - Guitar

Isadora Decker-Lucke - Backing vocals

Song & words by Ben Pisano

Holden

~lyrics~

i regret digging you a grave so shallow.
as if i await you shifting mounds of earth,
as if i want you to wake up and gut me for it.
but you will whisper at every pause on the turnpike.

i am the one choked up
on all the dirt and irony.
i am yours, eroded and mute.

you remain just beneath the surface, always,
as your parents have with you.
you have held your mother’s pain aloft, a coronary refrain.

am i the skin you grafted
onto all the wounds you didn’t tend to?
am i just flawed enough?

i cannot keep tracking mud through every home i enter;
i cannot put you to rest until you grant me silence.

~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, bass, keys, synths, drums, percussion, programming/sampling/processing

Kari Clifton - Cello

Olivia Shaw - Violin

Song & words by Ben Pisano

Revenant

Haven

Revelry

The second single off debut full-length, "Haven"

Patron

Solace

you can now find this song on spotify (https://open.spotify.com/track/2HX5E3lR3u8ErJWl2byxkw?si=45e8dd2fdb2c462e) & other streaming services (:

Agnes (Glass Animals cover)

a cover of one of my favorite andy shauf songs, "to you." arranged, recorded, mixed, mastered, and released within 24 hrs. i was v sick. happy valentines day <3

cover photos provided by amryn jaekel!

everything else by ben <3

To You (Andy Shauf cover)

~lyrics~

an open thought for
what it means & how it feels,
and the difference in each. (are you half unseen?)
all at once, i am all my best and all my worst.

do you wear it like a wreath when you can’t sleep?
it flooded every inch of me.
is it easier to breathe when i’m beneath you?

adjacent cause; adjacent flaws:
they do not spell out a name,
nor the boundaries you claim
when you feel you fit the frame.

crown the depths,
unsteep your guilt and your unrest.
reach around that remembrance, still.
hold me down until i do not speak anymore, and let it go.

do we brace until it breaks us in at last?
you are the daydream that i dread.
why is it harder to leave than to stave you off?

are you learning how it reads from far away?
they won’t love you for your grief.
it’s a prayer that you whispered half asleep,
it’s not a promise that you’ll keep.
credits
releases June 5, 2020
~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, keys/synths, bass, percussion, programming/sampling/processing

Sumner Erhard - Drums, bass

Produced, engineered, recorded, & mixed at The Astuary by Ben Pisano in fall + winter 2019.

Song by Ben Pisano, Sumner Erhard, & Jordan Leone. Words by Ben Pisano.

Mastered by Huntley Miller.

Cover photo by Madi Heath.

Design by Jordan Leone & Ben Pisano.

Wreath

~lyrics~

glass jaw hinged on the pain
i cannot wash the blood i taste
content to phrase it like the present
another year you cry resentment

hold fast the room you share
cut seams along the ways you care
you cut me in too late to save
you shed the shame too great to bear

bending back to see
all the shit you reap
refracted back through me

come home and tell us how you’ve grown
still, dreams where she speaks once more;
where i conjure pages torn
with eyes shut, we touch reform

cascading down through all my zeal
sinks deep into that rush i feel
i wear it thin, like i can cope
i wear it proud, like i’ve known no other

crooked neck to see
all the strife i bleed
i am the rotting leaves

does it teach anything?
wish it meant anything
wish i learned anything

does it teach anything?
wish i learned anything
wish i meant anything.

~credits~

Ben Pisano - Vocals, guitars, synths, bass, drums/percussion, programming/sampling/processing

Jeff Rady - Pedal steel

Alana Margolis - Additional vocals

Produced, engineered, recorded, & mixed at The Astuary by Ben Pisano from Dec 2020 - Feb 2021, with samples collected in Jun 2015, Jun 2017, & Aug 2019.
Pedal steel engineered & recorded remotely by Jeff Rady.

Mastered by Corey Coffman.

Song & words by Ben Pisano.

Cover photo by Madi Heath.

Design by Jordan Leone & Ben Pisano.

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