I have tinnitus, which I experience as a humming in my left ear. 

This is pretty close to what it sounds like, with the volume turned up to just below half-way on my MacBook Air and listening to the speakers. Try it, or listen with headphones in just the left ear (but be really careful not to listen too loud). 

It's worst when I'm somewhere quiet, like in bed at night or in the morning. The quieter the world is, the louder the humming. There's no such thing as silence anymore. I have to sleep on my right side because if I sleep on my left the humming feels louder, makes me crazy, and I have trouble sleeping. 

It also often feels like my left ear is blocked up, or that that it's unable to equalize the pressure, like when you're landing on an airplane, but there's no way to "pop" it and make it go away. 

When I first got the humming it made me feel so anxious, depressed, and crazy - almost as if I just wanted to take something sharp and stick it through my ear to make the noise go away. 

I've gotten more used to it now, and it mostly bothers me in the morning and evening when things are quiet, but sometimes I hear it really strongly during the day, especially when I'm tired or stressed. Often it makes it hard for me to focus on conversations, including with my partner. 

In a way I'm lucky - many people have it much, much worse. Some people have elected to have their auditory nerves cut by a surgeon, making themselves deaf, to make the hum go away - but this is a terrible idea in that it usually doesn't work, since the hum is not just in the ear but actually in the brain. Some people speculate that the reason Vincent Van Goth cut off his ear may have been in a mad attempt to stop experiencing tinnitus. Yes, it can be that bad. 

Some people have even killed themselves because they just can't handle the idea of an entire life of persistent loud noise, which is often much higher pitched and intrusive than what I experience. Mine doesn't cause that level of discomfort, but I can understand that it does for some people, especially those with really loud and high-pitched ringing or buzzing.  

One of the scariest things for me is not knowing how it will develop. Will it get worse (it already has in the last 1.5 years)? How much worse? I don't know. How will it affect me?

There's no known cure for tinnitus, though there are countless people on the internet trying to exploit desperate sufferers with fraudulent "treatments".

The only thing that helps me experience some relief is gentle background noise like ocean waves or rain. Sometimes I have to listen to recordings of them to help me fall asleep. It doesn't make the tinnitus tone go away - it just helps give my brain something else to focus on as well.

Take care of your ears. Once you damage them you can't fix them. 

chrislaughlin