have had writers block for a long time and haven't had my laptop I record on in a few weeks. here's a little super janky draft of a new thing, probably needs to be longer, another chorus bit?

ceiling, cold stars and mildew
silence, creak on the stairs
sleeping, dogs  bowel of sinew
changing, shedding it’s hair

driving, deer in the rear view
dealing, a hand unfair
cheapening, here in this grey stew
fading, queasy little square

kafka (rough early draft)

something a bit different, more experimental than I'd usually try, quite messy and a bit hypnagogic i hope. needs a lot of work but i think there's potential.

leaving into the night 
hitchhike 
my bike
you will not recognise 
your life 
you are leaving 
you’ll arrive 
tired eyes
city lights sleeping

wishing you’d write a line 
despise 
these lines
you will not analyse 
these cries
you are speaking
you’ll derive 
ired lies 
city lines are sleeping

leaving (1st draft)

badly recorded and mixed

lyrics:

under the streetlamp
feet in the light
blood on the boardwalk
limp through the night
he said: “covet your instincts”
head filled with flies 
lent over to kiss me 
put the knife in my side 

stumbled the pavement
to flag down a ride
the wind seemed to whisper
through the hole in my side
through your mistake
you might still get it right
curled in the backseat
of the passengers side

passenger side (rough draft)

something a bit straightforward i knocked out in a couple hours

lyrics:
michael, laid on his back
cradles a canvas bag
and he knows 
sickness grows
from a long time ago

fox and the crow
turn off your phone
you’ll dive alone
and feel 


michael, on the right track
patient to come in last
so it goes
years flow
from a wound long ago 
michael
michael

fox and the crow
turn off your phone
a drive alone
to feel

michael (rough 1st draft)

another 1 needs new vocals badly especially the chorus, falsetto is hard :(

lyrics:
safely displayed at the base of the news page
island 
turning away from a cynical stage play 
silent 
towers and stones
children in raincoats
sirens

septic stone of the lighthouse
pustules foam on the beach below me
all alone with the dregs out 
hardly never a soul below me
reasons up in the air
it’s bedlam down there

safely displayed in a cage of double glaze
tyrant
learning the ways that the cynical stage pain
quiet 
novelty soap
the children in black smoke
silence

lighthouse (rough 1st draft)

needs a lot of work

lyrics:
i was a lonely boy
passing for what you want

here on a lazy day 
cruising to melt away

i’d choke for you
you’d hold me too
slumped in your room
drunk on the fumes 

frozen
ocean
still in
motion
cloven
open 
sinews 
broken

trapped here by open streets
captive to summers heat 

sat by an open grave
smoking in twilight haze 

i’d choke for you
if you want me too
smoke in your room, 
your hair, your perfume

frozen
ocean
still in
motion
cloven
omen 
back is
broken

twilight haze(rough 1st draft)

rough

lyrics: 
from the spot where I am sitting
i can hear what you’re thinking
it speaks lonely, short revisions
it speaks muted television. 

you are bitter, sentimental 
a revolver atop the mantle
it sings sour and romantic 
in the flight path of the planets

satin revolver (rough 1st draft)

lyrics:
my feet are cold my head is wired
out underneath the Judas tree
is an absentee

his eyes are old his head is tired
all pooled up in the fallen leaves
is all he’s seen

these winding years will turn to grey
not knowing what I’m waiting for
what I’m waiting for
these whitened faces turn away 
each one no more than a corpse
more than a corpse

my head grows bald my heart grows tired
not knowing what I’m waiting for
just wait some more

so I stick around and light a fire 
and think “someone was here before” 
here before

judas tree (rough 1st Draft)

i wish i could sing or produce or play synths in time

lyrics:
You were always
Far behind
Speaking peculiar ways
Undefined 

I watched you silently
Run your lines
In our haunted house
Amusement ride

Talk about
Different things
All night

Brainwashed
Christmas trees
Fake light

All went
Different ways
That night

Oh god
Different leaves
Sunlight 

See your old friends
Dewy eyes
Working to the old same ends
A new disguise

You watch me silently
Hit rewind 
Artifice, memory
I don’t mind

Talk about
Different things
All night

Brainwashed
Christmas trees
Fake light

All went
Different ways
That night

Oh god
Different leaves
Sunlight

christmas trees (rough demo)

lyrics: 
crushed little ball
on the bathroom floor
dust fills up your eyes
now nevermore
your isle
will rise 

star tiled wall
constellated door 
light chalks your outline
now evermore  
your smile
will shine

endless beach (draft 1)

need to fix the vocals but i have a sore throat :(

olly your heart’s swollen shut
your different faces on the rocks
sarah you’re already done 
you’ve no arms left in which to run

olly he smokes out till dusk
his head in his hands and his lungs
sarah has grown to distrust 
a heart that promises too much

olly she’s all you have known
now bathed in halos from her phone
sarah he’s already shown
the best things rarely float alone

swollen shut (1st draft)

Disco Song 2nd Draft

Katy Song (Red House Painters Cover)

Stop Smoking (Car Seat Headrest Cover)

Burn The Witch (Radiohead Cover)

Motion Picture Soundtrack (Radiohead Cover)

L.A. Girlz (Weezer Cover)

Real Love Baby (Father John Misty Cover)

I Have Been Floated (The Olivia Tremor Control cover)

Pay No Mind (Snoozer) (Beck Cover)

Longtime Sunshine (Weezer Cover)

a song about relying on things too much

lyrics:

resistant to the flay 
but the needle tears away
respect the harmony 
as it’s humming soft through me

no love for artistry or fame
as I slide in and out of frame 
it bubbles in my speech 
a zombie fried out freak      

tie ribbons round my brain 
I was better yesterday 
sitting on a vacant train

inflicting the dampening pain 
it flows up against the grain
till I’ve nothing more to say

pull out my teeth to entertain
that which kills must surely maim 
your nocturne crypt entry
shall slowly silence me  

tie ribbons round my brain
it was better yesterday
see me in a vacant train

barely feel dampening pain
as it flows up towards my brain
and I am better than insane 
I am better than you say

than you say (than you say)

than you say (than you say)

it's not the same 
(it's not the same)

lost my way (as you say)

vacant

an extremely skeletal draft on a new song

rots my teeth and stains my skin
this treaty’s become punishing 
open glow
dusty road 
close my eyes
light my lantern in the northern skies  

it reaches out just like a fist 
growing out me like a cyst 
tragic joke
broken yoke
to my surprise 
put back together before sunrise

all bummed out and full of sin
my head’ll burst just pull the pin 
molov, the state I’m in

(could you tell me how that feels)

lantern (1st Draft)

first song i ever wrote, excuse the exceptionally shit mix and some weird sound choices

i can feel my past dictating 
what earthly beauty im validating
valet to thoughts that betray me 
there’s no nurture there I’m intimating 

gutter thoughts, intimidation 
i wonder where my minds been lately 
the light that breaks on water
betrays truth plainly 

she says we laid poison groundwork 
demons in this scorched church
ahe slits her wrists at the window 
evaline in the evening dirt 
    
there’s no stars where she’s waiting
the cemetery gates illuminating  
i save space, I burn the photos 
irrelevance preserved in retro

gutter thoughts, illumination
recently my backs been breaking 
the light that breaks on water 
derides truth vainly 

she says we laid poison groundwork 
lifeless is this scorched birch 
her flames lick at the window
evaline in the evening dirt
evaline in the evening burns 
oh

evaline (1st draft)

giant robot anime make me sad. super super rough draft probably my worst mix to date. vocals need a retake too. 

Baby please kill me
I want to die 
It’s a long, motionless entry
Playing out inside 
Honey I can’t breathe
My own lungs aren't mine
How desperate can one man be
To draw out the time?
But I’ll never leave
It’s so much safer inside

Open the blood vessels 
Flowing to my muscles 
Bleeding is no struggle
Easy
Drop in the air pressure
Breathing at your leisure
Choking for your pleasure
Dying
 
Brief conversations 
Leave no time for lies
If you have anymore reservations 
To personify 
Find me at the station 
Where cicadas cry 
I’ll tell you my revelation
We all have to try 
From this lofty elevation
I’ll swallow the sky 

Open the blood vessels 
Flowing to my muscles 
Bleeding is no struggle
Easy
Drop in the air pressure
Breathing at your leisure
Choking for your pleasure
Dying
Close my eyes
Nothing

shinji (1st draft)

country ep coming at some point 

humming wires, can you hear the west sing?
I can I see my destiny manifesting 
or maybe just mirage in the road 
toll booth trapped and change collecting 
golem monuments of pain erecting 
their fingers pointing out where to go

man alive, the whole crops infested 
all that’s left is what’s been digested
a barren silent desert nothing grows 
and of the pain that you invested 
the mercy toxins you’ve ingested
will ensure you let feel like letting go

heat flows
out the rim of a bottle
I feel indisposed 
nobody knows
It’s a brief blurb without you
Im here and gone alone

frontier

another super rough first draft demo, this time with my first attempt to program drums and a bass (with mixed results).

he’s special
got a graveyard of potential
popping kick flips with the devil’s
not so wrong

ineffectual 
misdirection is perpetual 
like a brainwashed intellectual 
i’m always wrong

i’m wasting time
i killed my soul 
waking up in bars
i don’t know 
burnt inside
by ethanol 
i don’t mind
well I don’t know

empty temple
from the tombs he rises gentle
casting doubt, humming celestial
solar songs 

be careful 
at a crossroads of the sensual
lies a vineyard of potential 
that’s thick and strong
 
i’m wasting time
killed my soul 
waking up in bars
i don’t know 
burnt inside
by ethanol 
i don’t mind
well I don’t know

sacramental skater

super rough first draft of a new synthpop idea, forgive the logic default drum loops and simple bass. bare bones.

sordid business but you came unprepared 
to bear witness through chemicals stained air
may I say, blown away
colours in your hair
best behaved, a freeze frame
beauty’s not been spared

silent mistress with deep marble eyed stare
bears no witness to his tangling hair 
may I say, I know shame
colours that we’ve shared 
move in place, we rotate
not moving anywhere

angel lifted by your vulgar night prayers 
tired and listless in truth he’s hardly there
i field blame, all the same 
the truth is hardly fair
through decay, I reframe
the fox becomes a hare

marble eyes (1st draft)

another uber rough 1st draft forgive the bad mixing and out of time synths 

leaving our clothes on the shores of the water
kissing goodbye in the sand and the thought of
leaving the dream
see the blood in the stream

scuffing my off white sole in the parlour 
watching the sunlight stream on the carpet 
just drifting away
when there’s nothing to say

afternoon daydreams leave for the garden 
hours and sun streams twist and then harden
into the dream
childhood memories

finding the bird the blood ran red marker
opened me up to a lifetime of martyrs
i’ll just pretend
knowing sweetness must end

Possum Kid

Pinned to spotlight

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