A decline of conciousness, memory, and structural intergrity.
A spiral towards nothing, towards a thick grey (blue) nothing.

-

Composed with the assistance of Laurie Spiegel's music mouse.

The Bluest Shade Of Memory

cassettes: https://bodydropuk.bigcartel.com/product/crimson-chaos-frail-ep-limited-edition-cassette

drums: https://www.instagram.com/hogarthhannam

there is a silence, that i cant cut out of my arms. 
this scathing nothing, 
pulls me in, claws in my eyes.
i wish to sleep so terribly

you will walk until ur toenails meet bone
then you will crawl, until those frail hands rot away.
here you lie the remanents of a failed man
and then you may smile
and then you may smile

the fool clambers on
the fool clambers on

never never never again, there is a silence i cant cut it out my arms. 
every time that you smile i feel pressure up on my cartilidge
never never never again
i burn, i writhe, at ur every resting twitch,
get the fuck out of me

Frail

cassettes: https://bodydropuk.bigcartel.com/product/crimson-chaos-frail-ep-limited-edition-cassette

production vocals and engineering - @crimsonchvos
guest vocals @fatshaudi

under the sun we all burn down
i see a life of fire in the sky
alone like you, i wander on,
i wander on, just a grain of life

just like you
just like you
just like you
just like you

wading, slowly,
holding out for something else,
to take its toll
to take its toll

i wonder how you sense ur excitement
i wonder what you see in me
i wish you well, i crave your excitement
i wonder what you see in me

can we swim forever
belly full of the ocean
grey motion
in this veil of blue, comfort i found

just like you
just like you
just like you
just like you

Just Like You w/ Fatshaudi

cassettes: https://bodydropuk.bigcartel.com/product/crimson-chaos-frail-ep-limited-edition-cassette

with great pain, i return from the abstraction,
the turn of my head robs me of my pretty cavern.
inbetween those sacred waves of nothing
her fucking warmth holds me captive

i am a prisoner held by interjecting colour
i am the curse of open eyes

i sink alone in my comfort abyss all i ask of you
my sodden lover
relieve me of the grey thats chained to my feet

that lingering touch, the touch of 10 daggers, 
a feeble attempt to carve feelings out of my skin

this bed is an inescapable hell scape
chained by the shackles of pleasure im prisoner again
the unrelenting filth it swarms me it captures me 
in embrace in embrace 

i awake, to this unbearable light
so thick it covers the stench of 
flacid conversation
my body is merely a vessel to discharge grey memories
i am pain incarnate

i sink alone in my comfort abyss all i ask of you
my sodden lover
relieve me of the pain thats chained to my feet

Pain Incarnate

cassettes: https://bodydropuk.bigcartel.com/product/crimson-chaos-frail-ep-limited-edition-cassette

lights low, a glance thats colder than death,
the candle light bubbles stress, on ur beautiful smile, 
oh i wonder if the dinner knife can carve through bone
carve through flesh, the coldest of stares,
im sinking into a depth fathoms deeper than your eyeline
meet mine, do it worse, justify 
such as this such a cold shade of red
 
it burns
it burns
it carves my smile
i ache, i spill everywhere
tripping over my inards, i never felt more alive

i laze, inanimate, im golden

irredescent, the brightest light,
i love you all, i wave from the night sky   


loved , cleansed, asleep, at home

Forever Gold Now I Can Paint The Night Sky

art: (thank u Alessio)
https://www.alexfordartist.com/
https://www.instagram.com/big.blackbox/

Today Was Such A Horrible Day And I Never Want To Live It Again

art - https://www.instagram.com/big.blackbox/

I find myself
Free of each and every chain
Washed away by the coral tones
Of your drifting breath
With your hand close to mine
Oh, I finally wish to live
Forever, forever

Oh my, oh my
Deepest ache will fall in your elegance

Sing me to sleep
Velvet retreat, wont you bring me there
Sing me to sleep
Velvet retreat, wont you bring me there
Sing me to sleep
a Velvet retreat, wont you bring me there
Sing me to sleep
Sing me to sleep
Sing me to sleep

Velvet Retreat

And For One Moment I Felt The Whole Worlds Embrace

Wounder - And May Time Finally Eat Me Up

floating out the cracks of my ashen cage,
lefst nothing but a powerless sob,
I AM curled up and alone.
countless tries,
no torrent of tears seem
to weigh the photos down
beaten and devoid of my lifeforce
i fold into the gray i fold into the gray
i no longer strive
for there it never left
crawl to the mile
that light will never find
cast aflame in radiance
ill mend myself sane again
overexposure, i have unraveled into a mess
unsightly untwined ravels of burning flesh
a rappel into gray riding those charred threads down
to peace, free of thought, im coming home
i rejoiced, within technicolor gaze,
your hand in mine, i finally wish to live forever
all my ache shall finally falter...
your gaze carved of me, a man devoid of dream.
i no longer sing, for wound has bested me.

Wounder - The Mile That Light Will Never Find

Wounder - I Can't Say That's Still True Now

Wounder - My Darkness is a Bell Tower

Wounder - Flight of the Mucus Seed

a moment of bliss
its over now
its over now
a moment of bliss
it sinks away
its cold now
its cold now
well i wont hurt today with you
my friend, alone again,
with sore heads and sunrise
i wrestle with the glass,
total collapse please do me no harm,
i just want to sleep tonight,
i drink my pride
swallow you with me, glistening taste
our new home
swallow you with me, easy mistake
our new home
down to the bottom away we go, to our new home
to our new home
a moment of bliss
its over now
its over now
leave me to drown, i will gracefully sink
and as i lie, captive in the sodden bedsheet, laced in tears and bile.
serenaded by the pounding drum of forgotten warmth.
i, am still a man that lived through another day.
and for why am i condemned to this pain for embracing others in dance.
its over now
its over now
its over now
its over now
its over now
its over now
its over now

Wounder - A Moment of Bliss

Wounder - I, the Man in a Case

a hollowing in my skull, you senselessly raped.
every thrust of dejection, every shed of tear you salivate
what void did it serve, in which orifice did it swear allegiance,
encased in wound and excrement, to where i go
oh so grievous .
every fucking entry, you bestow it to me like a gift
even still, its laced in absolute depth,
still some, of the prettiest, that i ever had
suspended fetal in mourn
you sculpt of me devotion,
arid flesh, my lips are a carcass
i long for your feed.
can we dance one more time as ribbons under your bedsheet
the weight is unbearable in your absence
sing me your song of exudate
I caress thee, a blemish on my skin, my beautiful abscess.
in tumor you have bound yourself to every flinch of my being
my innards ravaged, fucked apart at both ends, a kiss goodnight.
memory haunts my sleepless nights.
i wish yours to be my deathbed,
fill me slowly
with lingering memories, no remorse,
defile my whole, tease as you spread my ashes inside all of your holes

Wounder - Ash

track 2 of: 
 - Wounder - Flight of the Mucus Seed (2023)
- artwork : www.alexfordartist.com
//
in swarms of fever, incessant need,
i replay yesterday waltz,
over and over and over again
amidst these ill fated writhings
i wish only to touch a memory of you
i sing for my velvet retreat,
and may it be the last song i ever sing,
its the only catchy one i know.

i have found a home
in the sodden pillow case,
in desperation a turn to the sunken visage,
now remains only scar and tissue
misused and misplaced,
readjust my woeful face,
i have cried up all my tears, thus i turn to bloodshed
will u recognise me reddened and disfigured
a lament for lost grace,
i hope to find you miles deep within my skin,
i bare my all, out the porcelain casket
with which we could water the path back to magnificence
as moonlight stretches over my sanguine torrent
held in embrace, we can dance to the pulse of my flickering conscious,
i am forever yours
(what have you made of me, sinking on, o my lifeforce)

Wounder - An Ode To Great Loss

Wounder - Isles of Woe

Commission for "sol741, 2023" - Sculpture & Performance.
Assorted foley provided by : @isaac_maxwell

A Merciless Contortion Of My Three Seconds Prior Self

comissioned for Alex Ford: 
"The Onslaught Of The Everyday" (2023)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSdTkquxPVs

for
Reclaim The Mundane (The Koppel Project, 2023)

AV Product

The Onslaught Of The Everyday

Commission for Beth Newman-Mosely's unreleased short "Wander/Wonder"

Wander/Wonder

@mary-mousetrap
the sun has past the days have lost
their surrender
the same old song,
no more wonder.

off white mermaid tales
diamonds in the ceilings scales
i clench my watery eyes 
dream of a place unknown

its not much of a life
counting all of the nights
i dont sleep i just wait
to dream of your shine

spend all my time
chasing, ur shine
hurt all my life,
away from your time

---------------------

brand new shoes
make you born again
start anew
life as food, the end

but its not, it never is 
for what we want,
bathes in piss

you’re my weakness
hold my little finger dont let me go
hold me close 
i like when you hold me close
i like when you make me see there’s a beauty in everything  
i dont do anything except think about u

No More Wonder (+ Mary Mousetrap)

(REUPLOADED AUG 6 2018)
OFFICIAL VID:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ifkj8fZNQCI

Download

crimson//chaos. _Bleeding *VIDEO IN DESCRIPTION*

Cold Stranger

@222ily
prod. illegal

" I / / L Y."

https://genius.com/Crimson-chaos-cherry-red-eyes-222ily-lyrics

Cherry Red Eyes (feat. 222ily)

feat. @sleepisformortals

"jumping out up off my window based off ur request...
u told me i could be free but its jus a weapon that u use to hold me down"

Sensation (feat. sleepisformortals)

ground control, im no longer the pilot
undecided, stay silent
ground control, im no longer the pilot
reaction instant i react violent

ground control, im no longer the pilot
undecided, stay silent
measurement  unbalanced, i cant fight it
i see silence, i hear sirens

all i hear is laughin
i think in irration
should i hit the magic
to rid this sad happening

lack emotion
i been move frozen
did i have u hopin
that imma sip ur potions

i might, i might, go
tonight, time been, moving, slo 
all my life, running low
i cant scream, i cant pose

so my love, i might dissapear
to the night, say it now, say goodbye 
am i right, am i wrong do i matter
hold me dear in ur arms till i finally shatter

OFFICIAL VIDEO

Ground Control **mv out now**

verse 1:
intoxication, memories escaping,
hide my face, plz find me a replacement
this sensation forever changin
wrapped inside the fragrance destroys me i am shaking

shut my eyes i find comfort in the darkness
held within ur arms i was stuck inside the harness
the river bled scarlett
drown with me im harmless

take me home
inisde ur arms
helpless and froze
dont know where to start

Chorus:
sink tonight inside the river scarlett
im inside my happy ever after
dont look back
on what we never had

a thousand eyes on me tommorow night
no replies, mumbled goodbyes
im staggering, heart shattering
im back inside the old house

verse 2:
cctv
mistakes into a movie
ur basic symmetry baby im 3d
the way that i see
i see clearly
worlds so cold
the suns turned empty

vocalise the feeling in pretty oscilations
never spoke my heart, now im begging new placement
shapeshifter take a picture
flash cam obscures the light now its dimmer

ill be the agressor if ur feeling shy
prayers meant nothing i was staring at the sky
tick of the clock hands me pieces of the sunshine
yet im left a slave to the spotlight

Scarlet

britney spears - everytime *crimson//chaos. gaff remix*

@222ily
ill intentions get my heart compressed
is the spite expired i cant tell from what they said no
so i guess so
i gotta let go 
ill take on the complex and the feelings i gotta wrestle
is this what real life feels like cant tell
i need mother to pull me from this hell
hands round my throat every backroad that i go
stretch my head above water show you how memories can float
i know you know im hopeless
cant help it
i was hoping 
youd hold my hand
and tell me u was jokin

tell me live live live i cant live without skin
how can you deny me of the light that is within
cos hes sick sick sick shed the boy of his skin, shed the boy of his skin

u fiend darkness i fiend light
u play bad and ill play nice
although i can swallow pride
u dont seem so whole inside
is it cos u dont believe that life will find its way
is it cos u gave up love cos u dont think its real anyway
pls stop acting like drugs will fill that hole
dont accept the darkness u wont find ur home
open up ur heart again u wont go alone
all we need is friendship to fix and fill that hole
we can go together might release some pressure if we go together

tell me live live live i cant live without skin
how can you deny me of the light that is within
cos hes sick sick sick shed the boy of his skin, shed the boy of his skin

Hopeless Feat. 222ily

featuring - @820
production - @crimsonchvos
mix and master - @820 & @crimsonchvos

i wonder 
i slumber 
another nail in my palms
i fiend that darkness

wittled down to depths decieved
crave more darkness its the only relief
no sleep, no heat they provide all i need

grey pictures its fine i hate saturation
smite me apart, please i am complacent
an agenda? no child its in ur mind

thought you could save me
i wish you could
blacken it
sail away

a spider wanders
through my mind
let me sleep
jealousy

low life im callin upon u again 
feed sleep right to my scepter
i need ur everything i need ur every picture

i fiend that friction between our touches
that longing for something oh no im spiralling again

oh lord oh lordd dont make examples out of me
i seek i feel i reap the little that i can see

wittled down to depths decieved
crave more darkness its the only relief
no sleep, no heat they provide all i need

and all i cried for
was lost
so let me die
let me fly

Slumber Feat. Nosgov

so, so, cold
so, so, cold
carve u in

and all is lost, the curse of open eyes
this unrelenting frost, i call disguise
watch such grand structures writhe
the privilege to do such pure harm, divine

thoughtless warrior 
nervous, deface that love
chasing deeper shades of red 
its easier experienced at the end


so, so, cold
so, so, cold
in this cage of skin
suffocating carve u in

Perfect Catharsis

aghast my woeful heart
a cry in the dark I'm scraping off my guard

within membrane remains a suit of torture
within past memories wilts the frail orchard

Aghast

today, today, today
back inside the grave,
the coldest embrace,

i swear that im ok,
never one to take,
just one day onto,
forever

- 
A cry for help. A fleeting fit of power.

Written/Recorded 2020-21
Artwork : https://www.instagram.com/sydneycrysell/

Today

it came again
freeing hands,
theres
more to break i
know

stale carcass, from skin to
blossom, its only a dream,

ill go back to sleep
lifeless nothing, i
writhe within bedsheets

theres
more to break i
know

lock the boy into the dark

no hurt, no feeling
lifeless, cold

talk me out of that place,

grey field, the flowers grow,
inside my fraile bones
leave you, a shadow
trying to, hold onto a ghost

i know, i know
its so so cold
maybe the water will clean out my eyes

lifeless eyes,
lifeless smile,
paradise

lifeless eyes,
theres more to break i
know

lifeless smile,
theres more to break i
know

- 
A cry for help. A fleeting fit of power.

Written/Recorded 2020-21
Artwork : https://www.instagram.com/sydneycrysell/

There Was Nothing

"the fool " @thefo0l
i crawl out of the hole,
i was fucked unto.

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