Name: Jan 17 (Excuses) by Thrxttle
Duration: 3 min 17 s
Description: Today, I realized I've been letting myself down.

- Official song is out on Promoting Sounds

@TheMarkerFlipper x @Rxseboy - heart is bleeding (prod. heroe & the bootleg boy)

Powfu x Sleep.ing - Alienated

Star

Today, I realized I've been letting myself down.

Jan 17 (Excuses)

Lyrics

What do I do when you leave me here bleeding
How do I cope when my pasts not receding
How can I start to rebuild up my heart when you said to my face I’m a joke and your leaving

What do I do when you leave me alone
What do I do when you blow up my phone
How i text back when I know all the facts 
And You put up an act cause I know bout the cheating

Now your screaming that I hate you I hate you
No one really wants to date you yeah date you
Now Im hesitant to pick up the pencil 
Cause I’ve lost all the people that I relate to

Now your screaming that I hate you I hate you
No one really wants to date you yeah date you
Now Im hesitant to pick up the pencil 
Cause I’ve lost all the people that I relate to

Forget the times when you gave me a meaning
Fell for your laugh fuck I fell for your breathing
Then you switched up like leaves in the seasons
Running away and I rot into pieces
Fuck with my mental not feeling enough
Feeling the pain and I’m taking a puff
Playing the victim like what have I done
I see through the lies I see through the bluffs

I’m hating my person
Thinking bout life and I guess I deserved it
Could have been better I was just a burden
Wouldn’t care right now even if the world end
World end 
World end
thinking right now and I’m wishing the world end
And if it did I would save you a spot yeah you hurt me a lot but your my favorite person

You were there for me so why did you lie
I fucking loved you and I felt alive
My only friend and you stuck at my side
But I guess that’s convenient cause you stuck a knife
And I fell for you once nah I fell for you twice
But I fell to the bottom it’s dark there’s no light
And I know I sound petty I don’t wanna die
But just thinking of you I don’t wanna live life

What do I do when you leave me here bleeding
How do I cope when my pasts not receding
How can I start to rebuild up my heart when you said to my face I’m a joke and your leaving

What do I do when you leave me alone
What do I do when you blow up my phone
How i text back when I know all the facts 
And You put up an act cause I know bout the cheating

Now your screaming that I hate you I hate you
No one really wants to date you yeah date you
Now Im hesitant to pick up the pencil 
Cause I’ve lost all the people that I relate to

Now your screaming that I hate you I hate you
No one really wants to date you yeah date you
Now Im hesitant to pick up the pencil 
Cause I’ve lost all the people that I relate to

Cognitive Distortion (prod. tennis player)

written by Lxst Boy & Giovanni
produced by Boyfifty & Ayleen Valentine 
mixed and mastered by Giovanni
out on all platforms

thanks for all the support on the old version 💙
shoutout Matthias, love u bro

-lyrics-
(Hook: Ayleen Valentine)
I'm sorry that I let you down
it's probably cause I sleep too much
and every time that you're around
there's always something wrong

(Verse 1: Lxst Boy)
late nights and talks with my conscience
lately i been feeling nauseous
I write songs so call me off topic
lowkey wanna tell them to stop it
I'll just get walked on
I'm feeling that way like non-stop
I'm sorry I'm an outcast wait no I'm not
but I let you down whenever I talk
I'm feeling like a 9tails knockoff
I came from the sewers then the time stopped
im running around in circles in my thoughts
the clock winding down, hear the tick tock
when I'm locked in my room
I'm feeling the tension
record at my desk
these lyrics unscripted
writing these songs
that you'll never listen
cause you never cared
I'm a solo mission woah
uh I wanna talk
without feeling guilty
I need a shower
you making me filthy
blood stains the wall
you know that you killed me
its cold in my room
and at night it gets chilly
I wanna talk
but every time I do my heartstrings in a knot
in getting tired of writing these songs
and day by day 
you wouldn't tell me what's wrong
yeah

(Hook: Ayleen Valentine)
 
(Verse 2: Giovanni)
where am i goin, what do i got 
i feel so lonely, everyone stop
want you to hold me, damn i forgot 
what it was like, i feel distraught 
i let you down and watched you depart
now everything’s loud and i’m caught in the dark
like i’m in the dirt, buried with the worms 
and that is the funniest fuckin part
cause what did we say together
all of those times, that you let me down
tell the words that we sang together
everything’s fine, we’ll be alright 
we’ll fuckin stand in the rain together 
i don’t mean to cry, but why did you lie
remind me again why stayed together 

(Hook: Ayleen Valentine)

S T R E A M

Let You Down w/ Giovanni & Ayleen Valentine (boyfifty)

feature: matego // produced by: caps ctrl & xsus

my last goodbye w/ matego (Caps Ctrl & Xsus)

I Could Stay For Days (feat. Lxst Boy) [prod. Mist3r]

i ripped out the pages that reminded me of her
i know that i hate myself don’t need to see the words
i remember i had blamed myself for every time she hurt herself
it happened with the first but with the second it was worse
the deeper cut 
my feet are stuck and sink into the earth
i’ll never be good enough that’s something i have learned
crazy how the coldest person left me with these burns
and then in my time to heal it’s like there’s people taking turns
just to slow down my progress
i convinced myself that everybody is dishonest
i am no exception 
broken hearts and broken promises
follow me
traumatic memories are always haunting me
don’t pick up the blame to pour it onto me
like i always do
i’m not mad at you
because i been moving on and showing gratitude
i been smoking tryna fix my shitty attitude
numbing any feeling in my body through and through
and my memories are lacking any detail so i know that it’s working
i got a woman that i love and treats me better for certain
but the anticipation of finding what’s under the surface
it fucking kills me
but more because she doesn’t deserve it

so love me
tell me that i’m pretty know i’m needy but i need it cause i feel so god damn ugly
i hate the attention
then as soon as it is gone i feel like not a single person cares about me
i fucking hate the way that i ruin everything
cause i can’t control my anxiety
i’m selfish but i’d do anything that you need me to oh the irony

oh the irony
oh the irony
oh the irony i wanna live with you
but will you die with me
i spend this time with you and if it’s wasted
then that’s fine with me
i wanna cherish it
i wanted you to know that you can cry to me
and i hope you stay for a little while take your time to leave
oh the irony i wanna live with you
but will you die with me
(will you die with me)
i spend this time with you and if it’s wasted
then that’s fine with me
(that's fine with me)
i wanna cherish it
i wanted you to know that you can cry to me
and i hope you stay for a little while take your time to leave

so love me
tell me that i’m pretty know i’m needy but i need it cause i feel so god damn ugly
i hate the attention
then as soon as it is gone i feel like not a single person cares about me
i fucking hate the way that i ruin everything
cause i can’t control my anxiety
i’m selfish but i’d do anything that you need me to oh the irony

please love me, i’m trying my hardest (prod. 4lexf)

Rxseboy - Not Alright

I never left that classroom
Your ankles on my shoulders
Bodies turning over
And over again
Pitting flesh against flesh
I could scream if you didn't take away my breath
While we were touching, teasing, tasting, taking
And I could already feel my heart break
And still I burnt out my lungs on words like "forever"
And now that I'm older I guess I know better

I gave you the very best parts of me
What little I had to offer
So you can go home 
And I'll get stoned
And we'll forget about the heart inside your locker

Jan 17 (Excuses)

Thrxttle

Recent comments

cj classen

Dream vs Reality or illusion

Hsm

ℕø𝕥𝕐𝕠𝕦

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