I love your music dude it's helping me stay clean

Sigh, why must it be this way? I have a feeling nothing will get better. I wanna end this all but what is stopping me? My friends and family. I know they won't be happy but still. Why must I be so sensitive? Yell at me or whatever? I'll cry. Something off with your tone? I suddenly feel a pain in my chest. Being dead would fix all my problems. Even if my biggest dream is to meet my online friends irl. I can't do this anymore, someone end this please

I fear I am the odd one out. I'll dehumanize myself soon.

Nocturne of Ice Stardew Valley  On an out of tune piano

fish

please help me

please help me - d2s1 (SUPER slowed)

blades

d2s1

d2s1 - I think I’m superfluous (stretched)

30 09011

pointless

Hell Canto

On 7.10.23, Palestinian forces, led by Hamas, broke down the fence separating the Gaza enclave from Israel and unleashed a savage day of slaughter and kidnapping that ended with 1,195 dead on the Israeli side and 251 taken as hostages. The Israeli response was just as savage but much longer lasting and much, much more devastating. It resulted (at the time of writing) in around 72,000 deaths (70,000 - most likely, many more - Palestinians, largely non combatants, and 2,000 Israelis, largely soldiers) in Gaza, as well as at least 170,000 Palestinians injured, compounded by a genocidal policy of starvation and destruction of civil order. A response that has destroyed most of Gaza and accelerated the expansion of illegal settlements in the West Bank - where there have been around 1,000 Palestinian deaths caused by Israeli settlers and the IDF since October ’23. There have also been many deaths and injured in Lebanon, Syria, Iran and Yemen.

The horrors of the Unholy Land felt near at home, and like the invasion of Ukraine, pushed me to give some kind of personal response - however pointless and inadequate - beyond following and sharing news and commentaries. Already far into Luna rising, a text and electronica album about Ukraine and Russia, I didn't feel capable of responding with texts so I embarked on a wordless album called Hell Canto.

The parameters are the same for each of the Hell Canto pieces. I’d call the methodology a way of comprovisation, of making sound poetry, derived from vocal improvisations and electronic manipulations. In November '25, having recorded 50 pieces, decided to stop adding more - also the fragile and unlikely October '25 ceasefire remains in place though in practice the word ‘ceasefire’ is a bad joke, with no sign of real peace and humanitarian and political solutions on the horizon. I’ve listened through the 50 pieces and chosen 27 that I’d like to be included in the album and 23 which are orphans for the time being at least. The 27 pieces come to a total of 80 minutes which might be too long for a CD. It’s not sure yet. Anyway, for now there are 2 Soundcloud playlists - the 27 in the draft order for the album, and the 23 which for now are in order of recording.

Raining Spiderling
Istanbul, December 2025

pointless

d2s1

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