Name: Marbles by dan trueman
Duration: 6 min 21 s
Description: live recording of the premiere of Marbles, for the Crash Ensemble. March 2015.

composed and performed by Christopher Otto
engineered, edited, mixed and mastered by Christopher Botta

Violin Octet

if i talked to you again
know i’d spew out all the wrong words
forgetting everything i rehearsed

if i smiled at you again
know my brain would let me down
looking for meaning in every line on your face

rather live in the version stuck in my head
where i feel the funny feeling of release
maybe if i play it out enough in my head
i can trick the funny feeling into being real

it’s pathetic how much of an enigma this is to me
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
how to make it all better
how to make it all better for me

if i talked to you again
would that be an admit of defeat?
or just taking the higher road?

and if i smiled at you again
would you give a little back?
or leave me hanging with some kind of smirk on your face?

rather live in the version stuck in my head
where every little movement goes my way
maybe if i play it out enough in my head
i can trick every little movement into being real
into being real

it’s pathetic how much of an enigma this is to me
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
how to make it all better
how to make it all better for me
it’s impressive how long i can hold a grudge on a leash
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
how to make it all better
how to make it all better for me

i don’t know what it is i’m looking for, i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for, i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for, i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for, i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for, i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for, i’m looking for
i don’t know what it is i’m looking for
what i’m looking for

© Molly Trueman 2022

what i’m looking for (voice memo)

Cover of Yellow Dog Blues by W.C Handy. See performance https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xv2a23ZxLTc

YellowDogFragments Van Stiefel Gtr Laptop

could’ve sworn i knew your face like my own
in the light and in the dark and in a crowded room
could’ve sworn i was starting to figure you out
but right now you’re just a stranger to me
stranger to me

on a bench i never wanna see again
must’ve had this conversation before in a dream
every little thing you say and do digs away at my head
so embarrassing how much you have a hold on me

so goddamn emotional
over-analytical
asking for way too much of you
so goddamn obsessive
and way too invested
no i’ll never be enough for you

on a couch that played witness to it all
from the caution to the honeymoon to the saddest days of all
on a couch where you convinced me that you hate me
what a twisted way to realize that i love you
i don’t want to

so goddamn emotional
over-analytical
asking for way too much of you
so goddamn obsessive
and way too invested
no i’ll never be enough for you

can’t believe there was a time when you were here
can’t believe you were anything more than a dream
bc you’re a stranger to me
stranger to me

© Molly Trueman 2023

stranger (voice memo)

no need to write me a letter
no need to spell it on the shore
no need to be at every occasion
no need to hold open the door

i don’t know if i am asking you too much
why won’t you ever

just scream my name til i hear ya
just scream my name til i feel ya
just scream it loud as i run away
just scream my name til i feel ya
show me that i’m not a phase
scream my name as i run away

i like to think i’m not needy
i like to think i’m self-assured
i like to think i give you time and space
and that i’m the one you’re looking for

i don’t have time to teach you how to love
you don’t have it in you to

just scream my name til i hear ya
just scream my name til i feel ya
just scream it loud as i run away
just scream my name til i feel ya
show me that i’m not a phase
scream my name as i run away

away with all the pollen in the trees
(you call my name)
away with all the ashes in the breeze
(you call my name)
away with all the letters that you never wrote
and never will
you never will

just scream my name til i hear ya
just scream my name til i feel ya
just scream it loud as i run away
just scream my name til i feel ya
show me that i’m not a phase
scream my name as i run away

© Molly Trueman 2025

scream my name (voice memo)

World Premiere and Commissioned by American Composers Orchestra at Jazz at Lincoln Center on April 9, 2015, Conductor George Manahan

Sanctum, for orchestra and recorded sound, explores the sound of improvisation in Holiness-preaching traditions. I draw inspiration from recorded sermons, The Praying Slave Lady by Pastor Shirley Caesar, The Eagle Stirs His Nest by Reverend C. L. Franklin, and Reverend Charles Albert Tindley’s hymn, Stand By Me. Included are the voices of Marlene Pinnock and of activists in Ferguson, Missouri from 2014. Sanctum is my artistic response to recent events of police brutality. By employing techniques of layered repetition, rhythmic intensity, sounds of moaning and whooping, and voices of the past and present, Sanctum invokes solace found in the midst of persecution and tribulation.


Sanctum was commissioned and premiered by American Composers Orchestra with the generous support of The Jerome Foundation and The Peter Heller Fund.

http://acosoundadvice.blogspot.com/2015/03/courtney-bryan-native-of-new-orleans-is.html 

Sanctum for orchestra and recorded sound

you tell me you’ve seen me
many a time in a dream
where i sing you to sleep
make you believe it’s alright
i tell you you’re funny
but i’m thinking you’re full of shit
you tell me you mean it
please let me fall in love with you

you tell me you’re ready
you wanna take care of me
show me the places
the tourist knows nothing about
i tell you i’d love that
i wanna make sense of this city
wanna find all the people
who’ve been looking for me

screaming my name and
moth to the flame and
claim me
like it’s a game and

i am the prize
don’t tell me lies
don’t make me try
to read your mind

you don’t tell me nothing
you leave me to figure it out
you tell me you’ll call
then fall through the cracks like a ghost
if you’d told me you’re done
i would’ve been fine with that
but you tell me nothing
like you were never even here

i’m screaming your name
but it’s just a game

© Molly Trueman 2025

the tourist (voice memo)

live recording of the premiere of Marbles, for the Crash Ensemble. March 2015.

Marbles

i know that i will never feel what you’re feeling
i know that i will never understand the pain
i hate that i have taken so long just to listen
i hate that i am just beginning to open up

i won’t sleep soundly
until you’re set free

this is a world that never seems to get it right
this is a world that moves a beat behind the clocks
we are a world that’s ready for the changes
we are a world that’s dying for the changes
we are the world that won’t be waiting anymore

i won’t sleep soundly
until you’re set free

we are the world, we’re ready for the changes
we, we are the world, we won’t be waiting anymore
we are the world, we’re ready for the changes
we, we are the world, we won’t be waiting for nothing anymore
we are the world, we’re ready for the changes
we, we are the world, we won’t be waiting anymore
we are the world, we’re ready for the changes
we, we are the world, we won’t be waiting for nothing anymore

i won’t sleep soundly
until you’re set free

© Molly Trueman 2020

i won't sleep soundly (demo)

"The Curious One" by Rabbit Rabbit (Carla Kihlstedt & Matthias Bossi w special guest Jon Evans) from their upcoming album, Rabbit Rabbit Radio - Vol. 1, out August 20th, 2013. 

www.rabbitrabbitradio.com

Marbles

dan trueman

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