in the dark//SINNERSDEDX

and you told me it’d get better
never guessed that my mood would match the weather
grass grows 
things heals
i lost all of my appeal 
and i wish you told me sooner
cuz then i wouldnt look like a loser 
i guess it’s my fault for believing
that i would some day lose the feeling 

hey there i got your letter
every word bled through the paper
you wrote with so much weight
i hope you’re feeling better

avoiding signs from my body
cuz i can’t think of better things to do 
i lost everyone but you

cut ties with anyone around me
they never cared
about me
they’ll probably all
forget me
eventually

and i’m stuck 
being
everything i hated
and i wish 
that i could 
some how make it up to u
the lies and all my faults
were getting to me
i think i should rot
eternally

and you told me it’d get better
never guessed that my mood would match the weather
grass grows 
things heals
i lost all of my appeal
and i wish you told me sooner
cuz then i wouldnt look like a loser 
i guess it’s my fault for believing
that i would some day lose the feeling 

its so good 
lost feeling
im getting better im healing
on every first of the month
i always fuck it up
you didnt hurt me enough
so now we're back in touch
told myself i'd never fall in love again
care too much im fucking up myself instead
losing grip on my reality
its how it always ends
im never going back home
and i dont wanna be friends

and you told me it’d get better
never guessed that my mood would match the weather
grass grows 
things heals
i lost all of my appeal
and i wish you told me sooner
cuz then i wouldnt look like a loser 
i guess it’s my fault for believing
that i would some day lose the feeling

appeal (feat. vito)

the first single off my new ep 'learning to lose'
featuring @oni_boy
produced by @wisssery & @pekarot_161
mixed and mastered by me
i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
i couldn’t capitalize
on what i’d seen in ur eyes
i’d match ur porcelain smile
all while i’m dead inside
stop looking, nothing’s there
those nights are gone, i swear
i always needed more time
then wasted yours and mine
i’m always on the bright side
i’ll always tell you i’m fine
stop looking, nothing’s there
those nights are gone, i swear.

[oni boy]
everything’s is gone and now it’s missing
i swear at first you went and only got distant 
those fake smiles hiding behind some dead eyes
the smell of rotting flesh and decaying insides
so where’s the insight
so where’s clairvoyance
soothsaying futures
prepared avoidance
where’s my allowance?
the things that i’m owed?
you took it all and left my heart broken and froze
so baby what can i get back?
the living undead crawled out of the ground for attack
i swear emotions resurrected, getting zombified 
we stay evicted and vacated from those distant nights

i couldn’t capitalize
on what i’d seen in ur eyes
i’d match ur porcelain smile
all while i’m dead inside
stop looking, nothing’s there
those nights are gone, i swear
i always needed more time
then wasted yours and mine
i’m always on the bright side
i’ll always tell you i’m fine
stop looking, nothing’s there
those nights are gone, i swear.

learning to lose

stop looking, nothing's there. (ft. oni boy) [wisssery x pekarot]

spotify & apple music!

prod. me x @eric-godlow
shoutout @guardinmusic, one of my favorite songs n i thought id stick my own lil twist on it <333
original - https://soundcloud.com/guardinmusic/comicsans

[guardin]:
if it were up to me
i would be a tree
sit under the sun and smoke a blunt full of debris
i ain't got a job & i ain't got no damn degree
but the time i spend is wise and hours split up into threes
so i'm hoping that the work i put into this shit is worth it
i ain't got nobody in my tent up in this circus
write another body make the header have a purpose
yeah i like the title but the shit you say is
if it were up to me
i would probably leave
split the door in two so i could walk through it with ease
i ain't got no destination set inside of me
by the time i hit the ground i'll start to feel it in my knees
stayed inside for twenty years and i can't tell you if it's worth it
everyone acquainted they just know me on the surface
write another body make the header have a purpose
yeah i like the title but the shit you say is worthless

searching for acceptance in the ones i call my friends
i don't really talk but i sure hope you understand
everybody talking shit can catch these fucking hands
catch these fucking hands
and lately it's been harder for me try to understand
i put myself in predicaments that i never had planned
i don't go outside if i do it's for groceries and fans
any day now i could die please etch my grave in comic sans

[safeatlast]:

if it were up to me
there wouldn't be a rhyme or reason
opened my mouth once and it
was treated like it's treason
never did i even start to think that i'd be leavin'
everything will be okay you just have to believe in
yourself
it'll help you when there's nothing to look out for
everyone around you loves you more than you account for
only halfway to the top i think we're stuck on cloud 4
but we have to split apart to make it to the next floor

[guardin]:

if it were up to me
i'd be more discrete
wander in the dark until there's blisters on my feet
tear off all my skin under the middle of the street
lights and crawl into a hobbit hole in midst of my defeat
guess the corners of my eyes can probably tell you that it's worth it
it's head vs heart and my thoughts tend to make me nervous
write another body make the header have a purpose
yeah i like the title but the shit you say is worthless

guardin - comic sans (etchmygrave flip)

DESPERADOS

passtheduce

wanted you ft. shinigami [prod. mark taylor]

Lyrics

[Verse 1]
never needed drugs
yeah i need love 
they tell me suck it up
but my friends suck
people know im strong
but im also very fragile 
always on my own
got nobody on speed dial
fears always come to life
i fuck it up i realise 
thats the price i have to pay
the memories they fade away
will i ever be okay 
nothing's ever here to stay
you said u believe in me
but u end up leaving me

[Bridge]
i dont know if im wrong
i dont know if you're right
doesn't matter anymoore
doesn't matter anymore..

[Pre-Chorus]
and yeah im gonna move on
drop my feelings in a song
always working on myself
play the cards i been dealt 
lately wanna quit this game
but ppl rly need me sane
help them thru the pain again
i stand behind my fcking name

[Chorus x1]
sad ugh chill
nobody truly knows me no
free will
my emotions can't control me ye
stay still
but i keep going up
don't care bout the guap
just make the pain stop

[Verse 2]
damn i feel defeated 
i used to feel completed
staring at the moon alone
drowning but i stay afloat
keep my mind occupied 
otherwise im horrified 
of all the things i hide inside
hope i fall asleep tonight 
yeah i felt whole
now im missing my soul
trynna find my true self 
got too many real forms
do i really need help
man i really dont know 
where did things go wrong
where did things go wrong

[Bridge]
what can i do for you
what can i do for myself
what can i do for you
what can i do




[Chorus x2]
sad chill
nobody truly knows me no
free will
my emotions can't control me ye
stay still
but i keep going up
don't care bout the guap
just make the pain stop

make the pain stop [prod. born hero]

💔i hope you all like this track. i've been working on it for a long time💔
on spotify!!
https://open.spotify.com/album/06CzddPuDEy6RalhoPlZ8L?si=6jA6pYs5QZOC9VhdL96XJw

𝕚 𝕨𝕒𝕟𝕥 𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕣𝕪𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕠 𝕓𝕖 𝕠𝕜𝕒𝕪 (ON SPOTIFY)

stay still

Getting Old

Looking From The Outside In (it's really not that bad) feat. Pink Cig (prod. scryer)

ᴍɢᴍᴛ: ᴊᴏʜɴ@ʀᴇɪɢɴsᴜᴘʀᴇᴍᴇᴍɢᴍᴛ.ᴄᴏᴍ

wanted you ft. shinigami [prod. mark taylor]

deadjacob