Welcome to Dear Sybersue! In today’s post I discuss Adam’s question. 
Why Do I Have Such a Tough Time Holding Onto A Girlfriend?
We don’t always know how we come across in new relationships but if they keep ending quickly, it is time to figure out why there is a continual pattern of things not working out.

It is up to you who you attract and who you let into your heart, so ultimately it is “your choice” as to why something is or isn’t working out in your life. 

Let’s try to get to the bottom of what could be happening here…

There could be some self-sabotaging going on that you’re not aware of (This happens with both men and women)

1.  Be careful what subconscious messages you may be relaying to women. You may be saying things that paint you as unavailable. “I’m not ready for a commitment, I’m just into dating right now.”
2.  Is there something fear-based keeping you emotionally detached? Maybe some past heartbreak that is preventing you from having a committed relationship?
3.  Do you talk a lot about your EX on a date? No one wants to hear this even if it is on a positive note. It shows that you are not over them.
4.  Are you attracted to the same type of women all the time? (Bad girls, emotionally inaccessible women, or high maintenance? They are only there for a good time, not a long time?)
5.  Are you really listening to what she is saying and do you validate her viewpoint? Are the conversations nervous, uncomfortable, or one-sided?
6.  Are you sending out mixed signals that may be confusing the women you are dating? “I’m not interested in a relationship” but then you want to see them all the time. Or the opposite where you say you are ready for a relationship but don’t see them often.)
7.  Do you come across as too sexually assertive?
8.  Are you too ready, willing, and able with the women you date? Are you overly nice and accommodating to their every need?
9.  Are you playing push/pull games because you think it keeps them interested longer and makes you look mysterious?
10.  How is your self-esteem when it comes to meeting women? Confidence is a turn-on and very alluring in an initial attraction. First impressions make or break a second date!

Be clear about what you want in a partnership

Dating can be very stressful for both sexes but the first question I would ask you as my client is; “do you know what you are really looking for?” Sometimes people just want a relationship so badly that they overlook the importance of what they truly want in a partner.

If you just let things flow at a natural pace without having too many expectations things will often just fall into a nice rhythm. So many men and women overthink things which causes an unnatural and forced feel early on.

Timing really is everything

It takes time to build a foundation but sometimes our initial excitement builds the house first which causes those early euphoric feelings to crumble. it wasn’t built on substance and was constructed on lust and what we desperately hoped would happen. We get way ahead of ourselves!

Slow down and revise your expectations and your checklist

While it is important to have some expectations, they shouldn’t be unreasonable or unrealistic. If you have an obvious high maintenance checklist, the women you are dating may feel that they will never measure up to your high standards. That can shut the door pretty fast!

The best way to meeting your person is to be authentic to who you truly are. No BS, no games, and no facade behavior. You are loveable just the way you are and there is someone out there that will appreciate you very much.

Sybersue xo ❤

Why Do I Have Such a Tough Time Holding Onto a Girlfriend? 💔

is Long distance romance for you? Many couples have found each other in other cities and different Countries and are making their situation work!  Business travels and online dating sites have been the main reasons for this. Could you have this type of relationship?  Find out here what you need to be aware of when dating someone in a long distant scenario. 

Dating Advice Long Distance Romance - Is This for You?

Dear Sybersue,
Why am I so obsessive over the smallest things when I start out in a new relationship?  I constantly think “what if it doesn’t work out” or “what is the point in even trying to be with this guy as it won’t work anyway” and so on!  I find a reason for everything to be a problem and I am talking about little things too!

How did I get like this and why do I even bother dating anyone with this attitude I have acquired?  Am I looking for disappointment because that seems to be my weird comfort zone? Help me Sybersue!
Thank you, Jamie  <3


Why do I Obsess Over Every Detail in a New Relationship?

Is courtship a thing of the past? Are we being too judgmental too quickly before even meeting each other in person & maybe eliminating a prospective partner?
We need to go back to the dating basics and bring some creativity into the mix. The first few dates are important and are the building blocks of future dates!  
Please check out my blog & advice column at http://www.sybersue.com and see my latest post & videos: 10 Things Men Wish Women Wouldn't do & !0 Things Women Wish Men Wouldn't Do!  My co-host & I had a lot of fun making those two shows! :) 


Dating Advice for Men: The Do’s & Don’ts of First Dates

Many people only date through online resources. This is mainly due to age, time and busy careers. (You don’t even have to dress for the occasion unless you’re socializing with them through a Web cam.)  It is almost too easy and this is what causes the addiction. It can be very exciting for some people who have always had a minimal personal life.  All of a sudden they are getting 5 to 10 e-mails a day from prospective dates! Hello! What's not to like??
Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers


Are You Addicted to Online Dating?

Do you really want to be friends with your EX? Depending on how the breakup was initiated will be the deciding factor on how amicable the relationship will remain afterward. The friendship expectation should not be immediate.  Respecting your partner right up until the end will guarantee a better future for both parties involved.  Some people never completely get over a disrespectful breakup which can cause havoc on future relationships ~ even if they were in total denial that there were irreconcilable differences throughout their partnership.
Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

Should We Still be Friends With an Ex After a Relationship Breakup?

It seems that men and women cannot get past the fist 3 or 4 dates due to the mixed signals they are receiving. What is going on & why has that not changed over the years? How do we cross over that repetitive bridge that can bring us the love we want in our lives? 
Sybersue @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers



Dating Advice ~ Why Do People Send Out so Many Mixed Signals?

“I love you! It didn’t mean anything, it was just sex!”
How many times have you heard this line on TV or in real life? Would you be able to get past your partner cheating on you & if you were able to forgive them could you ever really forget? Which sex has the harder time dealing with this scenario? Listen here to see why women and men may cheat in their relationship and things to be aware of. 
Susan McCord @ http://www.sybersue.com
Video Talk Show @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers


Infidelity: Can you forgive a Cheating Partner?

Both men and women are quick to complain about how hard it is to date in the millennium but continue to make harsh judgment calls very early on when meeting someone new.

We all have special traits, every last one of us!
Are we trying to sabotage our own happiness because we don’t actually believe that we are worthy of having a great partnership? Is this where our high maintenance judgment comes from; out of fear?

Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/dearsybersue

Are You too Judgmental on a Date?

Jealousy is an insecurity that we feel within ourselves when we are dealing with personal self esteem or changes we may not be happy with. We may not like our jobs, our health may be compromised or we don’t feel attractive due to weight gain or a big birthday approaching.

Listen to this podcast to hear some of the Jealous Emotions You May be Dealing With.

Have you had a jealous partner or dealt with your own jealousies? How did you get past it?  Please leave your comments below.
Thank you!  Dear Sybersue ❤

Dear Sybersue YouTube @ http://www.youtube.com/dearsybersue
Dear Sybersue Facebook @http://www.facebook.com/dearsybersue

Is Jealousy Becoming a Dealbreaker in Your Relationship?

Susan McCord is a Dating/Relationship Advice Show Host, Certified Life Coach & Published Author.  Susan attended BCIT in Burnaby, B.C. for studies in Broadcasting. 

Susan was named a VIP member of Worldwide Branding. This special distinction honors individuals who have shown exceptional commitment to achieving personal and professional success.

Susan has devoted her career to helping others find happiness. Over the past decade she has established a stellar reputation as a sought-after dating & relationship expert, advice columnist, blogger & interviewer. She is best known for hosting a lifestyle advice  show for an International audience on YouTube. Her show, “Dear Sybersue,” has garnered more than 2.6 million views which consists of interviews, dating/relationship/lifestyle advice & comical skits. 

She has established a large audience via social media & has received acknowledgement from a number of professionals and celebrities. Additionally, Ms. McCord is an expert dating adviser for Vocal.media, Quora & maintains an advice column and blog Dear Sybersue, which is also the title of her book! 

Susan regularly posts videos/blogs that can be viewed on sybersue.com, Twitter, Vimeo, Tumblr, Pinterest, Instagram and her Facebook page at DearSybersue. Susan is noted for being wise and informative while being simultaneously friendly, down-to-earth & witty!

Susan has been giving advice to others for many years and she is excited to be able to transform her natural talent into a career. She plans to do as much as she can in the coming years in order to reach out and help an even larger audience find love and happiness. Her goal is to bring people together in a world that is still learning how to love and accept each other unconditionally. 

She makes you think! ❤️