One day a bright light dropped from the heavens and set a small bush ablaze. The burning plant started to talk to me. It gave me a very important task that would change the world. After this job everyone would live in peace and harmony. I did not want to deny the wishes of a dying scrub so I accepted. I set out on my quest. But I forgot what I needed to do so I just made this song. Enjoy!

Neonatal Tetanus

I made this song specially for my rabbit. It likes to listen to it while it chews my shoes.

Enteritis Salmonellosis (Salmonella Food Poisoning)

I had a lot of trouble making this song because I kept falling asleep constantly while making it.
But it is a good song when a lot of anoying flies are hanging around your residence and you do not manage to get rid of them using the conventional method by hurling your cat at them. Play this song and they get very tired, land on the wall, the table or some other smooth surface and sit still. Then you can shoot them easily with your revolver.

Parkinson

I once tried putting chilly pepers in my nose. It gave me almost the same feeling as listening to this song. The physician at the hospital told me not to put spicy things up my nose anymore because it is going to kill me. So this is now gives me a feeling of pure nostalgia.


Osteoarthritis

I thought up this piece when I still was in my mothers womb. It took me about 25 years to make it though. However my mother is now persecuting me because she wants half the credits. She only wants to speak to me trough her lawyer.
But do not let my missery ruin your perception of the music. Enjoy!

D.F.I.