c'est la vie

goodnight

tonight

joji - die for you (acoustic cover)

keep smiling

say “i love you”

date night

over

someone else

don't hide it

wants//needs

ocean blues

i won't let you feel alone again

i won't let you feel alone again (remastered)

no hard feelings

out the way

grief

never meant to hurt you

what's left of me

keep me up

shoutout to homegirl yools for the tag as always! happy bday <3 

with an ocean full of stars i wonder which one u are 
i always felt so close to u even though we're always so far
apart, and my heart it drowns at the thought of us not together
like im under the weather, how u got me fallin like a feather
in an ocean full of stars 
ur always on my mind no matter where u are 
and u know that ill always be carryin ur heart 
everywhere so u and i will never be apart    

because you~
got everything i need u know its true~   
maybe i can show u somethin new~
its funny bc u havent got a clue 
that lately i been feelin u 
when the sun is down youll rest your head upon my chest
i always see u as a treasure girl u got me obsessed
u take away the demons every time i feel depressed
and ik that i aint perfect but im tryin my best 
to be the one for you~
and everything u need u know its true~ 
and maybe u can show me somethin new~
its funny bc i havent got a clue~
that lately i been feelin u  

with an ocean full of stars i wonder which one u are 
i always felt so close to u even though we're always so far
apart, and my heart it drowns at the thought of us not together
like im under the weather, how u got me fallin like a feather
in an ocean full of stars 
ur always on my mind no matter where u are 
and u know that ill always be carryin ur heart 
everywhere so u and i will never be apart        

w feelins left unsaid, i lie awake in bed 
u know im always overthinkin always stuck inside my head 
im always scared of growin close but i still talk to u instead  
of never looking forward to whatever lies ahead 
w feelins left unsaid, i lie awake in bed 
u know im always overthinkin im just stuck inside my head
like im trapped within a maze, help me find a way
bc i been feelin lost for days i wanna fade away

into an ocean full of stars i wonder which one u are 
i always felt so close to u even though we're always so far
apart, and my heart it drowns at the thought of us not together
like im under the weather, how u got me fallin like a feather
in an ocean full of stars 
ur always on my mind no matter where u are 
and u know that ill always be carryin ur heart 
everywhere so u and i will never be apart    

w feelins left unsaid, i lie awake in bed 
u know im always overthinkin always stuck inside my head 
im always scared of growin close but i still talk to u instead  
of never looking forward to whatever lies ahead 
w feelins left unsaid, i lie awake in bed 
u know im always overthinkin im just stuck inside my head
like im trapped within a maze, help me find a way
bc i been feelin lost for days i wanna fade away..

<a href='https://theartistunion.com/tracks/229f80'>Download for free on The Artist Union</a>

8/25/2017

stream on spotify!

ocean of stars

thank you for all the love yall given me from when i started earlier this year, here's one last song before 2017 ends. i love yall, and i got hella plans for next year <3 
---
we both know i'm not the best at showing just how much i care 
but every word you've ever said, just know that i'm not unaware 

of all the little things you'd do, and everything that makes you cute 
cuz i'd give up the world in a heartbeat just to show that my love is true 

and i know it's been awhile, it's too late for me to say
that i still really love your smile, and i regret it everyday 

i lie awake, im stuck in bed,
thinkin of the words i never said 
i lie awake, can't leave my bed,
thinkin of the words i should've said to you
the words i should've said to you 
the words i should've said to you  

and i know it sounds cliche, i'm writing letters in my songs 
singing the same things over and over, like how i'm sorry i was wrong 

i know you hate when i apologize, and you hate that look inside my eyes 
you tell me it's alright, but i still hate it when you cry

i lie awake, im stuck in bed 
thinkin of the words i never said 
i lie awake, you're in my head 
thinkin of the words i should've said to you
words i should've said to you 
words i should've said to you  

and now i've gotchu you in my song, it's the least that i could do
anytime, just say the word; i'll do my best to make it up to you

cause there's nothing i wouldn't give to see you smile like you did
and there's nothing i wouldn't do, for one more chance to be with you

buy/listen

the words i should've said

much love to @kaiyko <3
art by both of us (flower pic by love-abia on tumblr)

[demxntia & kaiyko]
you're the flower that I saw that day
I miss the way you comfort me 
I lost my sense of feeling love
the day you walked away from me

[kaiyko]

The other day, I swear that I saw your face, 
hidden in the crowd like a ghost that just fades away
I promise I wanted to see you next spring time
But by the time you come around I wont be the same girl I am 
now you start to disappear, can't help myself but drown in fear
I'm counting all our days spent together 
and I wish good times could last forever and
this is all the time we have, and I know our goodbye is shattered
but you'll be in my heart till the end of forever because...

[demxntia & kaiyko]

you're the flower that I saw that day
I miss the way you comfort me 
I lost my sense of feeling love
the day you walked away from me

[demxntia]

waking up alone I feel like part of me is missing 
flipping through the photos of the memories we shared 
and I swear that I remember all the days we spent together 
but I ruin all the things that I hold close to me 
now I'm regretting every thing we never did I can't face it
the thought of you alone breaks my heart and I hate it 
but I hope that the sound of my voice is enough 
to reach the one that I'll always love

[demxntia & kaiyko]

you're the flower that I saw that day
I miss the way you comfort me 
I lost my sense of feeling love
the day you walked away from me

When the sun sets I'll try to remember 
the things you that you promised when we were together
I'll dry all your tears if it means that you'll stay
I'll find you again and again till this pain fades away

the day you walked away

spotify, apple, etc.

the day you walked away w/ kaiyko

longer vers: https://share.amuse.io/album/demxntia-goodnight-pt-ii
music video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjgdRt6yUa4

ik we both shared a past 
of regrets n scars 
but we can leave it behind
n jus run away far 
we'll let the moon n the stars
show us where we are tonight~

ik we both like to laugh
jus like everyone else
ik it seems like the world
wants to take that away 
so grab a hold of my hand
n we can leave this pleace tonight~

longer version

tonight // pt. II OUT NOW <3

much love to @keshibeats
pleasure working with u brother <3

//demxntia

don't put up a front with me
is this really how you want it to be?
ik you're lookin for excuses to make other plans
when he's not around to hold your hand

and all the times that you called me
crying on the phone
please don't sell yourself short
cuz you're scared of bein alone

i don't wanna see you hurt anymore
no i don't wanna see you hurt anymore

it kills me
everytime that we speak
ik that you wanna be free
but ur trapped in ur memories
yeah it kills me
oh, baby it ain't hard to see
you're happier when you're with me
you're happier when you're with me

//keshi

take my hand
i need your attention
fuck yo man
i’ll teach him a lesson
if we speak in bodies
we can’t tell nobody
fuck you when u lonely
but i know she say that i am not enough
in my heart i know that i am not enough

//demxntia

baby girl it kills me
everytime that we speak
ik that you wanna be free
but ur trapped in ur memories
yeah it kills me
oh, baby it ain't hard to see
you're happier when you're with me
you're happier when you're with me

so don't put up a front with me
is this really how you want it to be?
ik you're lookin for excuses to make other plans
when he's not around to hold your hand
so don't put up a front with me
is this really how you want it to be?
ik you're lookin for excuses to make other plans
when he's not around to hold your hand

it kills me

it kills me w/ keshi

uwu

ik you well enough to
understand what's going on 
same shit on another day 
the same problems won't go away

you think he's gonna change
you know he doesn't care
your patience's running thin
it's way too much to bare
you argue every day 
and then you come to me
baby stay with me
i can keep you company

baby stay with me
i can keep you company 
baby lay with me
we'll fall asleep beneath the sheets

because nothing in the world 
can come between us
we got everything we need
just the two of us

and honestly
you should be 
anything
but stressed out
over him
ik you're over him

you think he's gonna change
you know he doesn't care
your patience's running thin
it's way too much to bare
you argue every day 
and then you come to me
baby stay with me
i can keep you company

baby stay with me
i can keep you company 
baby lay with me
we'll fall asleep beneath the sheets

because nothing in the world 
can come between us
we got everything we need
just the two of us

between us

turn out all the lights
baby it’s just you and me now
stay up every night 
we don’t ever need to sleep nah
you got me feelin right
where i need to be
baby lock eyes and
show me that you need me

i been thinkin bout you lately 
girl i know you want to
you can always slide by my place
you got my heart burning up babe
every single time that i lay
my eyes on your face

yeah i’m fallin for your body
and your mind too 
forget the past, 
we can leave it all behind you
i won’t let you feel alone again 
i won’t let you feel alone again, no

with your hand between my fingers 
i don’t ever wanna let go
yeah i’m mezmerized by your figure
never get tired of you at all, and

baby girl you should come through
we can do whatever you want to
just sit back and let me love you

turn out all the lights
baby it’s just you and me now
stay up every night 
we don’t ever need to sleep nah
you got me feelin right
where i need to be
baby lock eyes and
show me that you need me

put your body up against mine
couple hours we never look at the time
lay in bed as we watching the sun shine
through the curtains and passing the window blinds

yeah, and you’re so warm
in the middle of a winter night
so glad that i made you mine
i feel fine when you’re beside me

with your hand between my fingers 
i don’t ever wanna let go
yeah i’m mezmerized by your figure
never get tired of you at all, and

baby girl you should come through
we can do whatever you want to
just sit back and let me love you

turn out all the lights
baby it’s just you and me now
stay up every night 
we don’t ever need to sleep nah
you got me feelin right
where i need to be
baby lock eyes and
show me that you need me

SPOTIFY

thank you for 6K. glad to finally work with one of my best friends in the scene @ihateshinigami

i never asked 
for the cards 
i been dealt with
and i still
don't know
where my mind is
feel like
my happiness and i
have part ways
feel my eyes
growin heavy
on my pale face

and all i ever
wanna be is enough for you
but i never get close
no matter what i do, and
everybody is sayin
i should relax
but the stress is 
piling up as time elapse

and i swear it never gets better
i been sleepin less and less
this shit is lasting forever
but i try my fucking best
i got too much on my plate
i'm sorry i'm far away
i promise i don't mean to be
but this ain't easy to say

so don't go away from me
i just need a little bit more time
don't go away from sme
i just need a little bit more time

when it's said and done 
i hope that i'm enough
for the ones i love
but it's getting tough
so just bear with me
you're the one i need
i've been losing sight
got no room to breath


[shinigami]

w/ my eyes wide open
i see clearly now
stretch my hands
let fate fall into place

up and down i been falling
cold wind calling my name
i'm not the same as i once was

i'll take you away
to a world that is glistening
where everything's fine
have you even been listening?
i'm falling apart
you knew this from the start
lay your head in my arms
we'll never be apart

losing sight w/ shinigami

guitar by me
everything else by @officialbiosphere

do i make it look easy?
the way that i deal with things
cuz i promise it ain’t as it seems
you’re not the only that’s hurting
girl ik that shit for certain
i spend half of my time
just missing you
the other half
i’m staring at my lock screen
and all i’ll see is the time
it’s haunting my mind
but baby you’re all that i need

the films that we watched
the songs that we sang
when you’re not around
it isn’t the same
it’s been getting harder
and harder to fake
can’t do a thing without
seeing ur face, i’m 
counting the days again
hopin it never ends
i promise i’m tryin my best
for you;
but it hasn’t been hurting less because

i been so lonely without you here
and i haven’t rest since you disappeared
i just hope you know that i always care
and i apologize it’s so unfair

and girl it ain’t easy
these feelings they eat me
it’s driving me crazy cuz
idk what i been doin lately
so tell me baby
what it is that i should do
yeah tell me baby
cuz i’m lost without you

the films that we watched
the songs that we sang
when you’re not around
it isn’t the same
it’s been getting harder
and harder to fake
can’t do a thing without
seeing ur face, i’m 
counting the days again
hopin it never ends
i promise i’m tryin my best
for you;
but it hasn’t been hurting less because

i been so lonely without you here
and i haven’t rest since you disappeared
i just hope you know that i always care
and i apologize i can’t be there

i been so lonely without you here
and i haven’t rest since you disappeared
i just hope you know that i always care
and i apologize i can’t be there

lonely without u [prod. biosphere]

merch: https://demxntia.bigcartel.com/product/alive-again-tee

astari: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5srEHn2jjmM
produced by @skress
guitar by me
art by digitalyams

yeah it's getting late 
oh god my mind is wandering off again
baby i'm afraid
of all the pictures painted in my head
tryna find a way
wipe the canvas clean and make amends
baby i'm not okay
i just wanna feel alive again

tell me when i can start my life again
cuz the anchor at the bottom
keeps my ankle in the sand

ion think it's somethin u would understand
i wanna get my shit together
but it never go as planned

i just wanna be enough for you
yeah i just wanna be enough for you
when i'm barely enough for myself

yeah it's getting late 
oh god my mind is wandering off again
baby i'm afraid
of all the pictures painted in my head
tryna find a way
wipe the canvas clean and make amends
baby i'm not okay
i just wanna feel alive again

i just wanna be enough for you
yeah i just wanna be enough for you
when i'm barely enough for myself

alive again

alive again [prod. skress]

another ceiling i don't recognize
another feeling and i'm petrified
i've been flying out just to stay inside
i never listen to my own advice, no

what the hell have i been doing?
makin up excuses, i don't wanna do this
so what the hell have i been doing?
i been stuck inside a room with
way too much to lose

but it's worse at night
something's gotta give
i don't wanna die but
i don't wanna live
it gets worse at night
something's gotta give
i don't wanna die but
i don't wanna live

tryna be strong is my weakness
what's a life with no meaning?
help me get rid of this feeling
i'm not alive i'm just breathing

no, oh
don't go
no, oh
i'm alone

something's gotta give

OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO HERE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pbnrnTJpvB0

shoutouts 2 @kaiyko as always!!

let me have a minute to get
my head on straight
i really haven’t been myself
for almost 28 days and i think
what a bummer could November really be?
i think there’s something that my eyes can’t see
cuz lately i’ve been getting so upset
with almost everything 

i don’t wanna be a villain
in this story of mine (neither do you)
i don’t wanna be a perfect person
that’s just a lie
but you keep taking all the words that
keep falling out my mouth
i don’t think you see what my
problem is even all about

oh, what a lie 
that we live
it’s alright to be 
alone sometimes
what a life 
that we’re given
it’s alright to to be 
alone sometimes

efforts wasted
and so am i tonight
feelings faded
like everything in my life
different faces
i’d rather stay inside
been gone for ages
so why’d you stay tonight?

i don’t wanna miss you
i don’t wanna need you
i don’t wanna feel like
i’m nothing without you
i don’t wanna miss you
i don’t wanna need you
i just can’t pretend
that i’m perfect without you

oh, what a lie 
that we live
it’s alright to be 
alone sometimes
what a life 
that we’re given
it’s alright to to be 
alone sometimes

and i don’t wanna
live a life where
i’m feeling sorry
so baby take all
my mistakes
and blame it all on me
cuz i’m not you and
you’re not me
so we can just 
call this a tragedy
but then i’d be
lying once again

it's alright w/ kaiyko [MUSIC VIDEO IN DESCRIPTION]

all those nights
we fell 
asleep
feels so right
when you’re 
here with me

i don’t wanna wait 
for you anymore
this could be our secret
baby you’re my weakness
you don’t gotta think 
about the past anymore
i can be your present 
girl it ain’t no question

and i can take you 
anywhere you want
it doesn’t matter 
if it’s right or wrong
yeah i can give you 
anything you want
i’m the one you been 
waiting for all along

cozyboy
and i can take you anyway you want
help you fall asleep baby anyway you want
hop all on a plane fly you anywhere you want
fly you out to see me baby wont you come and see me

oh
you can take me anyway you want
hold me to your chest
until i fall apart
feel a way and kiss me in the motherfuckin dark
tell me that you need me baby
 tell me that you need me

i dont care what your friends do yea
cuz they aint nothing like you
aint nobody like you yea
and i know what you been through

you been stalling on the phone
girl i know
you're so indecisive
hurt a lot before feeling sore
sore

i'm the one you've been waiting for w/ cøzybøy

[demxntia]
girl your love take me higher
got me burning up; you the wood to my fire
fit the match
of all the things i desire
uh from your hair down to your attire
round two when i'm tired run it back like
girl you know i make u sing like a choir
i know you shy you don't gotta keep quiet
you know i love it can't deny it
layin next to you in the night baby so serene
when you're next to me
feelin so carefree
and what's in between
so serene
when you're next to me
feelin so carefree
and what's in between
won't you stay here
a little bit longer
with me tonight?
won't you stay up
a little bit longer
with me tonight

[dion dugas]

baby what you doing
moving?
talk a lot of shit what you proving
you’ve been looking out of town
got to choose then lose him what you want to say
let me get a second i’m texting I’m on the way
a quarter past five with 9 lives to pay
i should of took a flight to relight a way
seen you on a night to relive our days
maybe i’ve been thinking out a loud
wondering if i would of gone, yeah
would i be the one that was alone, lonuh
instead of you, i feel like i was wrong
broken, sulking, hoping sounds of your voice
in the dark kept me open
don’t say if you really do mind
i find that we always decline
one day we should really rewind
cause lately i feel crazy
without you

[demxntia + dion dugas]

won't you stay here
a little bit longer
with me tonight?
won't you stay up
a little bit longer
with me tonight

serene//rewind [feat. dion dugas]

i just wanna brighten up your day
i just wanna make ur clouds go away
help u see the sun on the other side
wipe away the rain drops from ur eyes

i can see the pain inside ur eyes
u can see the void inside of mine
baby can you tell me what’s on ur mind
happiness is hiding behind the lies

my intentions never show too well i know
i always feel i gotta fix it on my own
i try my best to end the vicious cycle
it’s not enough i’m in denial 

i just wanna brighten up your day
i just wanna make ur clouds go away
help u see the sun on the other side
wipe away the rain drops from ur eyes
i don’t ever mean to make u cry
i just wanna know how u feel inside
if im overthinking i apologize
wanna be the best for u and i

raindrops

every time i lay my head down
i play back the sound when you said you loved me
the smell of perfume’s reminder 
being with you is the happiest i’ll be
i’m doin my best to be the one for you
cuz i’m in love wit us; and you’re the one i need
you’re more than enough for me babe
and you’re all the above for me lately

we all have insecurities
but we’ll work through em together
ik we’re not there yet
but this feeling won’t last forever
and baby i promise
that i’ll show you what love is
i’ll always be honest
anything that u want girl i’m on it

we got problems but in my eyes you’re worth it
we got problems but in my eyes you’re perfect
give you my all cuz i know that you deserve it
i’ll do anything i can to make this work yeah

[laeland]

Girl pick up your phone
I know that you’re alone
This is my last attempt 
After this I’ll be gone
No more apologies 
No more sitting at home 
Yeah tell me what you want

Yeah just tell me what you want
And I’ll be there
Girl I swear 
Cause memory of you 
Is what I miss 
Can’t forget 
sweetest smell of your perfume
And girl I know I’m a mess
I’ll clean this up like it’s my room 
You’re my princess and I’m your prince

[demxntia + laeland]

we all have insecurities
but we’ll work through em together
ik we’re not there yet
but this feeling won’t last forever
and baby i promise
that i’ll show you what love is
i’ll always be honest
anything that u want girl i’m on it
we got problems but in my eyes you’re worth it
we got problems but in my eyes you’re perfect
give you my all cuz i know that you deserve it
i’ll do anything i can to make this work yeah

perfume w/ laeland

you bring me up when i’m down
you make me smile when i frown
i’m not myself without you around, no

keep me in check when i’m lost
the sound of your voice is so soft
and i’m not myself when you are gone

and i don’t need no one but you
no one but you baby
and i can’t love anyone but you
anyone but you, 
there’s no one like you

you’d go above and beyond
when you feel like something is wrong
i know it’s hard when we try to be strong
but none of that matters

when you’re in my arms
and i’ll always keep you
inside of my heart
wherever i go
i can only hope
i’ll be in yours too

and i don’t need no one but you
no one but you baby
and i can’t love anyone but you
anyone but you, 
there’s no one like you

no one but u

NEW ALBUM OCTOBER 9TH 2020 🌐🖤
shoutoutz 2 @kaiyko

it feels like i'm stranded on my own
this is not the way it's supposed to go
taking me for granted i'll take you to hell
fuck all the help

even when i'm down
i try to bring you up
even when i'm empty
i try to show you love
even when i'm lost
i try to find a way for you
to smile when i'm not
with everything i've got

i gave it my all
trying my best for you
it wasn't enough
doing the best i can
i'm only a man
why can't you see that?
my world is burning down

why's this happening
i thought that i could change
but now i'm desperately
searching for a sign that leads
nowhere at all for me
and honestly
i wanted you to be the one
to break me free from this scarcity 
of loving myself for the person i am
today and not the way
you look at me so casually
when i'm about to break
when i'm about to go breaking down again
how do i send
all my love but all my love is
still reaching out to you
still reaching out to you

i gave it my all
trying my best for you
it wasn't enough
doing the best i can
i'm only a man
why can't you see that
my world is burning down

it feels like i'm stranded on my own
this is not the way it's supposed to go
taking me for granted i'll take you to hell
fuck all the help

tell you that honestly i wanted you
to be the one to break me free
break me free from this scarcity
i'm living with all your love
but all my love's locked in me
it's still reaching out to you
still reaching out to you

demxntia 🌐🖤

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