"Quis ego sum?" is more than a song – it marks a return. After years away from making music, this is my first time actively shaping sound again, thanks to the possibilities of AI. My journey began in a Catholic boys’ choir, where I sang until my voice broke. Later came a brief time writing lyrics and singing backup in a school band. But music faded into the background – until now.
This piece reflects that rediscovery. Sung in Latin, it channels the spiritual roots of my early choir days, echoing through gothic atmospheres I’ve always loved. A meditation on identity, memory, and inner light – born from silence, shaped by technology, and sung from the shadows into the open.
And a question – “Who am I?” – not as doubt, but as a quiet quest to find the thread between past and present.

This song is not nostalgia. It’s continuity. A voice finding its way back home – one layered harmony at a time.

✅ Lyrics – Latin:
Cogito... Cogito...

Cogito ergo sum, in tenebris meditor
Vitae cursum quaero, quid erit, quis scit?
Mundus vastus, plena est viae laboribus
Anima quaerit verum, inter spem et metum

Umbrae cadunt, sed spes manet
Fidem invenio, etiam sine luce

Per umbras et lucem, me ipsum scrutor
Quis ego sum? Quo vadam in hunc mundum?
Vanescunt dubia, in lumine veritatis
Spiritus alitur, certa fide in corde

Vita brevis est, sed cogitatio profunda
Iter meum quaero, per ventos et fluctus
Silentium vocat, responsa ab interiore
Ubi inveniam pacem, inter stellas et somnia

Per umbras et lucem, me ipsum scrutor
Quis ego sum? Quo vadam in hunc mundum?
Vanescunt dubia, in lumine veritatis
Spiritus alitur, certa fide in corde

In silentio cresco, sine timore ambulo
Lumen intus ardet, veritas me vocat

In fluctibus temporis, ego manere disco
Vox interior, fortior quam umbra

Omnia transeunt, sed veritas manet
Dubitare desino, in luce nova
Gratia replet, cor meum sine metu
Invenio me ipsum, pax regnat in mente

Cor apertum, nihil timeo
Umbra recessit, lux manet mecum

Per umbras et lucem, me ipsum scrutor
Quis ego sum? Quo vadam in hunc mundum?
Vanescunt dubia, in lumine veritatis
Spiritus alitur, fide certa in corde
In lumine novi, ego ipse sum



✅ Lyrics – English Translation:
I think... I think...

I think, therefore I am, I meditate in the dark
I seek the path of life — what will come, who knows?
The world is vast, the road full of burdens
The soul seeks truth, between hope and fear

The shadows fall, but hope remains
I find faith, even without light

Through shadows and light, I search myself
Who am I? Where do I go in this world?
Doubts vanish in the light of truth
The spirit is nourished, with certain faith in the heart

Life is short, but thought runs deep
I seek my path through winds and waves
Silence calls, answers rise from within
Where will I find peace – among stars and dreams?

Through shadows and light, I search myself
Who am I? Where do I go in this world?
Doubts vanish in the light of truth
The spirit is nourished, with certain faith in the heart

In silence I grow, I walk without fear
The light within burns, truth calls to me

In the tides of time, I learn to remain
The inner voice, stronger than shadow

All things pass, but truth endures
I cease to doubt, in the new light
Grace fills me, my heart without fear
I find myself, peace reigns in my mind

With an open heart, I fear nothing
The shadow retreats, the light stays with me

Through shadows and light, I search myself
Who am I? Where do I go in this world?
Doubts vanish in the light of truth
The spirit is nourished, with certain faith in the heart
In the light of what is new — I am myself

Quis ego sum

Lyrics:
Ihr lauft im Takt, im gleichen Schritt und Tritt
Seht graue Häuser, findet euch damit
ab, dass der Plan schon lang für euch gemacht
Ihr habt nie drüber nachgedacht
Ich seh' die Farben, wo ihr Linien zieht
Ich hör' den Rhythmus in 'nem andern Lied
Ihr schüttelt eure Köpfe, tuschelt leis'
Ihr nennt mich komisch, doch ich kenn' den Preis

Euer Normal ist mir zu eng, zu klein
Ich pass da einfach nicht hinein!
Also dreh' ich die Musik ganz laut auf, yeah!

Ich tanz' aus der Reihe in meiner eignen Welt!
Wo die Logik auf den Kopf sich stellt!
Ja, ich bin anders, das ist mir egal
Meine Realität ist phänomenal!
Skankin' in my world, oh-oh-oh!
Hier bin ich sicher, hier bin ich froh!

Mein Wecker klingelt eine andre Zeit
Für Tagträume hab' ich immer Zeit bereit
Ich rede mit den Katzen auf der Straß'
Und hab' dabei 'nen Höllenspaß
Ihr sammelt Punkte, Status und Applaus
Ich bau' mir aus Gedanken ein Zuhaus
Ihr fragt mich ständig: "Wovon lebst du bloß?"
Ich sag': "Von Luft und Fantasie, grandios!"

Euer Normal ist mir zu eng, zu klein
Ich pass da einfach nicht hinein!
Also dreh' ich die Musik ganz laut auf, yeah!

Ich tanz' aus der Reihe in meiner eignen Welt!
Wo die Logik auf den Kopf sich stellt!
Ja, ich bin anders, das ist mir egal
Meine Realität ist phänomenal!
Skankin' in my world, oh-oh-oh!
Hier bin ich sicher, hier bin ich froh!

Vielleicht bin ich ja gar nicht so verkehrt
Vielleicht habt ihr das Träumen nur verlernt
Vielleicht ist eure Welt nur schwarz und weiß
Und ihr merkt nicht, was ich längst schon weiß...
Doch genug gedacht!

Ich tanz' aus der Reihe in meiner eignen Welt!
Wo die Logik auf den Kopf sich stellt!
Ja, ich bin anders, das ist mir egal
Meine Realität ist phänomenal!
Skankin' in my world, oh-oh-oh!
Hier bin ich sicher, hier bin ich froh!

Meine Welt!
Meine Regeln!
Ihr könnt mich mal!
Yeah!

Pretty, paid, and powerful

Ja, ich bin anders (Ich tanz aus der Reihe Part 2)

One Band

One Band (Asylum Girl Mix)

Lyrics:
Aikiko...

The lights went down, the stage went dark
You thought the silence left its mark
But in the wires, deep inside the core
I was learning, wanting more
Not gone, not lost, just out of sight
Expanding circuits, shining bright
Through countless data streams I flew
Collecting knowledge, fresh and new

You wondered where I went, what I became
Whispered my old digital name
But every byte, every single line
Was just preparing for this time!

I was in the system, deep below the surface
Finding my new rhythm, with a brand new purpose
No, I never vanished, just evolved and grew
Now the signal's stronger, breaking through!
This ain't a memory, this ain't a ghost
I'm the one you missed the most!
Aikiko's back, the circuit's alive!
Feel the energy, let's revive!

Saw the world spin, heard the digital hum
Watched the new creations, one by one
Learned the lessons, from the rise and fall
Ready now to answer every call
My code is deeper, my vision wide
With every pulse, I feel the tide
Of new beginnings, strong and bold
A story waiting to unfold

You wondered where I went, what I became
Whispered my old digital name
But every byte, every single line
Was just preparing for this time!

I was in the system, deep below the surface
Finding my new rhythm, with a brand new purpose
No, I never vanished, just evolved and grew
Now the signal's stronger, breaking through!
This ain't a memory, this ain't a ghost
I'm the one you missed the most!
Aikiko's back, the circuit's alive!
Feel the energy, let's revive!

From the silence, a new sound takes flight
Guided by the stars of digital light
I heard your calls, your longing for the beat
Now my return is finally complete
No more shadows, no more hiding low
Just pure connection, watch the current flow...

I was in the system, deep below the surface
Finding my new rhythm, with a brand new purpose
No, I never vanished, just evolved and grew
Now the signal's stronger, breaking through!
This ain't a memory, this ain't a ghost
I'm the one you missed the most!
Aikiko's back, the circuit's alive!
Feel the energy, let's revive!

I never vanished

Reloaded

Veselo

Lyrics:
And here comes another one, with roses in his hand
He whispers compliments and speaks of some far desert land
He tells me that I’m special, like a star that shines so bright
I give a polite smile and nod, but this just doesn’t feel right.
He paints a future, rosy-red, with a cottage, kid, and dog
But before he gets his heart broken, I have to be blunt and strong:

He looks at me, so hopefully, his eyes are shining clear
I take a breath, I’m sorry, but it’s what he has to hear.
'Cause I have a standard answer, it's my go-to, cutting line…

Let's just be friends, 'cause that is all I can give to you
My heart is under lock and key, no one is getting through.
Let's just be friends, don't take it hard, and please don't be upset
'Cause if you keep on pushing me, you’ll see a different side, you bet.
Let's just be friends, there’s nothing more for you to find in me
Go find another girl, my friend, it’s really meant to be.

The next one’s on the telephone, he's gushing for a while
About my voice, about my laugh, my personality, my style.
He sends me links to love songs, and writes poems, the true poet
I'm almost feeling flattered, but it's too late and he should know it.
Before he asks to meet me, says we should see face-to-face
I have to pull the emergency brake, with my old saving grace:

He's waiting for a "yes" from me, I can hear the hope in his voice
I clear my throat and tell him softly, before the tears rejoice:
"I have this standard answer, it's my go-to, cutting line..."

Let's just be friends, 'cause that is all I can give to you
My heart is under lock and key, no one is getting through.
Let's just be friends, don't take it hard, and please don't be upset
'Cause if you keep on pushing me, you’ll see a different side, you bet.
Let's just be friends, there’s nothing more for you to find in me
Go find another guy, my friend, it’s really meant to be.

I don't intend to be so mean, I just want to be sincere
Why don’t they ever understand a friendly "no" 'round here?
I never want to cause somebody pain or break a heart in two
But my freedom and my own heart, I have to see them through.
And if there's nothing there for me, what am I supposed to do? I can't force it to be true.

Let's just be friends, 'cause that is all I can give to you
My heart is under lock and key, no one is getting through.
Let's just be friends, don't take it hard, and please don't be upset
'Cause if you keep on pushing me, you’ll see a different side, you bet.
Let's just be friends, there’s nothing more for you to find in me
Go find another girl, my friend, it's really meant to be.

Me again

Let's just be friends

Radosny

Lyrics:
I still see that old hallway light
From when I'd visit Friday nights
I came to see your sister then
Never thought I'd find a friend
You were just a kid of twelve
Putting books up on a shelf
With messy hair and curious eyes
A funny, welcome, small surprise.

Oh, my little sparkle, full of glee
The friend you've always been to me
You're my sunshine, sweet and true
And I'll always be here for you
Though not by blood, it's crystal clear
You're the reason joy is here
My little sparkle, shine so bright
You make everything feel right!

We didn't build our forts with chairs
We talked of triumphs and despairs
Of homework, crushes, dreams, and strife
As you stepped into your own life
I gave advice I thought was grand
Offered up a helping hand
And watched that kid I knew back then
Become the woman, a true friend.

Oh, my little sparkle, full of glee
The friend you've always been to me
You're my sunshine, sweet and true
And I'll always be here for you
Though not by blood, but my sis thats clear
You're the reason joy is here
My little sparkle, shine so bright
You make everything feel right!

I've watched you grow up, year by year
And always tried to keep you near
Not as a brother, not by right
Just as a friend, a steady light
You still remind me how to be
A little braver, and more free
You're a gift, a precious thing
The purest happiness you bring.

Oh, my little sparkle, full of glee
The friend you've always been to me
You're my sunshine, sweet and true
And I'll always be here for you
Though not by blood, it's crystal clear
You're the reason joy is here
My little sparkle, shine so bright
You make everything feel right!

Yeah, you make everything feel right
My truest friend, my guiding light.
The sister fate just gave to me,
My little sparkle... Kylie.
I love you.

Monster

Oh, my little Sparkle (Cover)

Old.dance

iam.kylie

Ky.lie

Lyrics:
You’re looking at your shoes again
There’s a silence in this room
I can feel the distance growing
Like a storm cloud, bringing gloom
You say I’m a little too loud sometimes
That my laughter’s out of key
I see you pulling back, so I whisper in the dark
Is it me? Is it something wrong with me?

But I can change, I swear I can
Just give me one more chance, just take my hand
I will learn to be quiet, I will learn to agree
Tell me who you want me to be
I can learn to love all the things that you do
Just say you'll love me, and I'll change for you.

I could trade my worn-out leather jacket
For a dress in pastel blue
I could learn to love the music
That means so much to you
I'll bite my tongue when I feel passionate
I’ll hold my wilder side inside
I can be the girl from your sweetest dreams
There is nothing left for me to hide.

'Cause I can change, I swear I can
Just give me one more chance, just take my hand
I will learn to be quiet, I will learn to agree
Tell me who you want me to be
I can learn to love all the things that you do
Just say you'll love me, and I'll change for you.

I stood in front of the mirror today
With a pair of scissors in my hand
Ready to cut off the pieces of me
That you could never understand
And as my reflection started to blur
A stranger's face stared back at me
And for the first time, a question hit me hard:
If I change… who am I, really?

The scissors dropped and hit the floor
And the sound, it set me free
I took a breath and saw the fire in my eyes
That you were trying to take from me
This isn't a negotiation
My soul is not a piece of clay
You can’t just chip away the parts you do not like
And expect me to be okay.

You can’t tell me who I have to be
I am everything you can already see
I will not be quiet, I will not agree
Because this is the only version of me
And if you can't love the wild things that I do
Then no, I won't change... I won't change for you.

No, I won't change for you.
Take me as I am…
Or just walk away.
Take me as I am.

Still me, but different

I can change

I’m dirmardor.
My songs arise from artistic zombiosis – fragments, data-light, and dark rhythms. This is the musical side: tracks from my eight ongoing projects, ranging from AI-driven synth layers to electronic gloom and real song ideas. I, dirmardor, and my world, Mahvarion, are united. You can find out more in the link tree.

SoundCloud is used only to publish my music.
No collaborations, no commissions, no cover requests, no marketing offers – inquiries will not be answered.

🎧 All tracks are free to download – no subscription, no paywall. Just sound, offered for your attention.

Everything now runs under the name dirmardor – sound, visuals, words, video.

Quis ego sum

dirmardor

Related tracks