If this is our world could you please stay in it
She wanna fucking die she don’t think that I get it
We’re both outcasts but together we fit in
One day you’ll forget me I’m just counting the minutes

Give me one thing to believe in
I’ll give you a million
if you Love it give it freedom
You love me cuz ur leaving
You hurt me but you mean well
Spare me the details
love you like I need braille
You treat me like I’m junk mail

Face first on the muthafuckin pavement
You don’t wanna talk okay bitch say less
I fell for you but it don’t come painless
time goes by I start loving something faceless

do you really think you could love me forever?
do you really think that i'll ever get better?
i've been known to be the great upsetter
this is my world you're the star at the center

i know im crazy girl i can't help when i fuck up
i've been done dirty i'm still healing all my old cuts
thought that i changed but my brain always stay stuck
maybe i'd be better if i stepped in front a mac truck

i know that we could last 
don't leave me in the past
my life is moving slow
why my thoughts so fucking fast?

Give me one thing to believe in
I’ll give you a million
if you Love it give it freedom
You love me cuz ur leaving
You hurt me but you mean well
Spare me the details
love you like I need braille
You treat me like I’m junk mail

Face first on the muthafuckin pavement
You don’t wanna talk okay bitch say less
I fell for you but it don’t come painless
time goes by I start loving something faceless

face first w/doan (johnnyfriend)

thoughts & feelings

By @carlby
Featuring @kanashisadface
Produced by @sorrow_bringer
Engineering & additional vocals by @horoshavibes

LYRICS
I can do this on my own
I don't need your influence
Got me feeling so low
Damn you really put me through it
I'm off the meds now
But I'm on the mend now
Figuring myself out
I dont fuck with self doubt

I'm on my way up
Standing on my own feet
I don't need no crutch to lean on
I should've known better than to fold under pressure
Knowing full well that I can't rely on these drugs forever

But I just wanna feel better
I just wanna feel something other than this emptiness

(Kanashi)
I just wanna feel a little bit better
Take another hit
My eyes go a little bit redder
I'm so sick of all the lies they feed me
Emptiness is not a substitute for how I'm feeling

They shove these pills right down my throat
Will they ever work
Nobody fucking knows
And I swear they just want to control me
This little tiny bottle got me feeling like a zombie

Carlby - Crutch w/ Kanashi (Prod. sorrow bringer)

hows it feel..?
v v v
oh my god..
hows it feel to be pronounced as dead?
hows it feel to be shot in the head?
hows it feel to be ten grand in debt?
hows it feel to know your grandmas dead?

hows it feel to be pronounced as dead?
hows it feel to be shot in the head?
hows it feel to be ten grand in debt?
hows it feel to know ur grandmas dead?

hows it feel when ur six feet deep
no one to call but ur known in the streets
said ur not in love but boy i know ur lying
yeah u use to have ten grand, on grand, on grand
but now ur trying.
trying
trying
trying
trying...

(funny little da da da break)

oh my god..
hows it feel to be pronounced as dead?
hows it feel to be shot in the head?
hows it feel to be ten grand in debt?
hows it feel to know your grandmas dead?

hows it feel to be pronounced as dead?
hows it feel to be shot in the head?
hows it feel to be ten grand in debt?
hows it feel to know ur grandmas dead?

hows it feel when ur six feet deep
no one to call but ur known in the streets
said ur not in love but boy i know ur lying
yeah u use to have ten grand, on grand, on grand
but now ur trying.
trying
trying
trying
trying...

... <3

pronounced as dead (splashgvng x irby)

this is the first beat I bought and the first song I made with jolst :)

lyrics 

painful like a blister
optimism is a sickness
call a liar as ur witness
just to cover up ur tracks
contemplating on my wisdom
do u take the chance n miss em
do u turn around n kiss him
just to validate ur act
but u don't stick to ur bones
there's time to change ur mind n call ur parents n go home
christ, God, put down the phone
binary solarity too hard for u to cope

oh, I'm nothing but a stoner
I'm a deadweight better as a loner
u can cry girl I can be ur shoulder 
I'm alone and I'm only getting colder

my brain has faulty wiring
tryna get undone
the doctors call it bpd
I'm messed up as they come
cause every minor set back 
leaves the feeling of a gun
pressed to my head n then I panic
cause the the chamber to be spun
hey aren't u shamed?
aren't u so n sos ex?
idk maybe I'm just tryna forget
I find it kinda funny that I'm known for my regrets
but the people that uv loved will always try to get revenge
the pain is in my brain n I swear it's gonna last
I'm still got up on the shit that happened to me in my past
disregarding all my feelings cause the time is moving fast
and my friends are placing bets on how long they think ima last
oh I bet that I'll see u in the nighttime 
bad dreams, cracked seams with the red eyes 
my bloods worth less than ur damn time
I'm a corpse tryna fight off these damn flies
oh I already told ya
I won't be sober till some point after October
time flies everyday we gettin older
we grindin hard, we just tryna find some closure

binary solarity (Jolst)

Lyrics:
deadtomorrow:
standing on the ledge 
hopefully I don’t fall
10 stories high 
hopefully I don’t die 
oh please don’t cry
i just wanna fly
I’ve wanted this for life 
I’ve wanted this for life 
thoughts of suicide 
they’re runnin in my mind 
Runnin in my head 
sayin you should be dead 
really scared to die
I’m not gonna lie 
talk bout it all the time 
but I’m fuckin terrified 

let me go
i wanna go
don’t wanna stay
let go of
my fuckin waist
i wanna fly 
I wanna die 
think it’s my time 
think it’s my time 
no one can save
 a damn life
many have tried 
i already died 
on the inside 
loved you too much
wanted you in my life 

standing on the ledge 
hopefully I don’t fall
10 stories high 
hopefully I don’t die 
oh please don’t cry
i just wanna fly
I’ve wanted this for life 
I’ve wanted this for life 
thoughts of suicide 
they’re runnin in my mind 
Runnin in my head 
sayin you should be dead 
really scared to die
I’m not gonna lie 
talk bout it all the time 
but I’m fuckin terrified 

seejayxo: I don't wanna let you go but
I know I can stay
I been in my room since thursday
Riding through the city with the top down
i just really want to get some top now
i think she want me back cuz im a rockstar
and i just put her in that brand new chrome hart
heard he talkin shit well i dont know him
if you wanna see me try then ima show em

scared to die ft. seejayxo (thersx)

lyrics

i said 
hey hey hey hey
woah woah woah woah

i said 
hey hey hey hey
woah woah woah woah

take a trip through my city baby this ain’t rainbow road
u said imma miss u but i been breaking mold
big draco with the stick baby kiss me thru the phone
running through these temples dodging foes and chasing gold

all designer fit that’s fendi, uh
commas in the bank got plenty
like i went to oxford
but grammar never made me a penny

splash of lemonade in my henny
keep it fully automatic and i keep it semi 
i can slow it down
i can talk u nice
but ur a dumb bitch
and i know what u like

i been taking trips 
san antonio to tokyo
she looking for a prince charming
but i’m more like romeo

take another sip and slip away into the void
got it tatted on my stomach imma die a loverboy

take a trip through my city baby this ain’t rainbow road
u said imma miss u but i been breaking mold
big draco with the stick baby kiss me thru the phone
running through these temples dodging foes and chasing gold

said she wanna fall in love but she just tryna smother me
sorry but i’m leaving baby hope u find another me 

nope
they just can’t do it like me
nope
wanna see me under white sheets
either with the coroner or trapped away for eternity

fly away
i’m breaking out of this cocoon
seeing brighter days
i’m still the highest in the room
used to be my sun ray
add some brightness to my moon
but i have to say
since u been gone i’m in a better mood

i said 
hey hey hey hey
woah woah woah woah

i said 
hey hey hey hey
woah woah woah woah

take a trip through my city baby this ain’t rainbow road
u said imma miss u but i been breaking mold
big draco with the stick baby kiss me thru the phone
running through these temples dodging foes and chasing gold

rainbow road (taurs x ripwarheart)

and i said i wasnt ready but
you insisted that i stay
theres like no way in hell
that you could ever make it all okay

i dont wanna put my faith in
somebody else
the only person ive ever trusted
has been myself

ive been this way for so long
ill just stay this way
and write my little songs
i dont need anyone at all
at all

dont try to tell me
you think that your so good for me
your not!
cuz i dont wanna waste no ones time
so please just stop

please stop 
i dont wanna hear you talkin anymore
just wanna sip this drink
until pass out on the floor

and i dont have the patience
for people anymore
cuz when flowers lose their fragrance
they just go and buy some more

yeah dont waste your time on me
ive already made up my mind dont you see
i dont wanna give u everything
cuz thats the one thing i wont receive....

MONARCH FREESTYLE

DYING IN THE CUT

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