Got off the phone with Tony.
We haven’t spoken to each other in such a long time. 
Maybe I’m just feeling lonely,
But I remember when used to get along just fine        

Now I’m standing crying in shower.
Stone breaks down to pebbles and milk always turns sour.
Still I dedicate your memory to the hour.   
Hey baby I miss you.  

Exchanged an email with Lisa.
She moved down to Miami; I know you hate Miami.
A dollar slice of mushroom pizza
And we’re back on your couch making out to the grammy’s. 

So I’m standing crying in shower
Stone breaks down to pebbles milk always turns sour
Still I dedicate your memory to the hour
Hey baby I miss you
(2x)

baby I miss U ;(

Tomorrow never comes
And today’s just a phase
It feels like right now
It feels like…

TOMORROW Never Comes

CHORUS
The atomization of society 
Is itemization of the individual’s propriety.
I leave you at the taxi stand, say goodbye to me,
Resolving myself to the simple cultural sobriety.

VERSE 1
I left you at the taxi stand
When I first met you, you were another man.
Hair green, mustache trimmed, body tanned,
Feelings backed-up and backlogged like water behind the hoover dam.
I’m on a rowboat, I’m on a dingy. 
Pacific ocean garbage floats past I eat the food it brings me
I take it all back to the facts:
I was too skinny, you were too stingy, I was too clingy,
You were too all over the place. 
Space heaters beat against my back and bottles strewn across the floor give me no pause, no breath;
A heart attack sending me over balcony edges onto asphalt hard and black.
The atomization of society 
Makes me look back at you with a certain kind of bruised notoriety 
A certain kind of deep, sinking, snake-pit anxiety 
You should have oh have never gotten back with me.

CHORUS

VERSE 2
I turn myself inside-out. 
I pull apart my veins to find out what it was all about. 
About-face to face myself only to bottom out,
Scraping the bathroom tiles of my psyche for the truth in its dust and grout.
It gets caught in my fingernails; I break them off.
I look in the mirror to see what you see, but I can’t see it and I can’t take the mask off.
A screaming ringing through my ears: 
Life's only hard if you’re too soft, if you’re not smart,  
If you’re not ready to lay it on the line. 
Why you gotta wake up in the morning and look everybody in the face and tell them, “I’m fine.”
Why I gotta get on the train and play podcast and smile like I’m not lying. 
Like I’m not lying.  
The atomization of society pits you against the others 
It rips you from the womb, gives you a knife, and tells you to slit the throat of your own mother.
Expulsionary society puts you in little boxes just to smother you. 

CHORUS

society ATOMIZED

Merry Christmas from beyond the grave!!!!!!!

THREE SHIPS (DJacob x Sting x Jackson 5)

TEARSTAINED

(Chorus): Sitting there in over-alls, 
To catch your eye makes me feel small
The stereo playing Biggie Smalls
Wash over me, wash over me
Comparison to gale’s squalls
The stereo playing Biggie Smalls
There shouldn’t be a choice at all
Gloss over me.

Grey and green, the silver sea
Entice my love come back to me
At least come back for memories 
The silver sea, so grey and green

I go to restaurants with flairs and themes
I buy a coffee, room for cream
I catch a look, off glasses gleam
Breathing in again, the espresso steam

Moonlight, cliff-face, town below
A town where I can’t and where I shouldn’t go
A town whose noise and space feel slow
Give in to the gables and the cobblestone

And a neon sign in indigo
A carousel with buffalo
Atop perches a single crow
His face looks just like kneaded dough and you

(Chorus)

Your peerless touch, it makes me clean
Open me up to delicacies
Stood on shore feeling the seams
Of the rock, the silver-grey ocean-green

Assert myself in the water’s foam
Do I never want to leave, or just go home
This echo chamber, lover’s dome
Give me your shoes, tell me where to roam

If I sold my soul for pocket change,
I don’t really think that you would find it strange.
You’re the kind whose feelings never rearrange
Whereas I attract people: deranged

Back to the town below the cliff 
The indigo sign, the drink is stiff
The single crow hands me a spliff
And I reach into my coat to find the gift and you

(Chorus)

Gray and Green

Nobody tells me anything no more
Nobody
Nobody tells me anything no more, oh no

Jekyll and Hyde shit, who keyed up my four door
I don’t want no surprises, I’ll just wait at the drug store
Can’t find my I.D. I can see clear that you’re bored
Eye’s flashing bright green, but I’ve been done since April
Turn off your hi-beams I can’t see the damn road. 

Honor roll, hypothesis
She graduated, won’t be missed
They plow their car into a ditch
He’s found with Xanax in his fist. 
Old dry wood that cracks and splinters
Chafing hands, lengthening winters
Faking smart and reading Pinter
Sending the SparkNotes to the printer

Nobody tells me anything no more
Nobody
Nobody tells me anything no more, oh no
(2x)

When I have a problem, and I can’t explain it,
I don’t want to do anything
I just want to sit and complain about it
Just sit around and complain about it 
Is that so hard to understand? 
(x2)

Nobody tells me anything no more
Nobody
Nobody tells me anything no more, oh no
(2x)

Honor roll, hypothesis
She graduated, won’t be missed
They plow their car into a ditch
He’s found with Xanax in his fist. 
Old dry wood that cracks and splinters
Chafing hands, lengthening winters
Faking smart and reading Pinter
Sending the SparkNotes to the printer

Jekyll and Hyde shit, who keyed up my four door
I don’t want no surprises, I’ll just wait at the drug store
Can’t find my I.D. I can see clear that you’re bored
Eye’s flashing bright green, but I’ve been done since April
Turn off your hi-beams I can’t see the damn road. 

Or maybe I don’t want to

Nobody tells me anything

COMIC STRIP (Serge Gainsbourg x Brigitte Bardot)

I wanna be about you
I wanna see the things that you see
I wanna 
I wanna talk the things you wanna talk about
I wanna
I wanna see the world through your eyes
I wanna 
I wanna see the world through your eyes
I wanna hear the world through your ears
I wanna
I wanna smell the world through your nose
I wanna
I wanna touch you
I wanna touch you
I wanna 
I wanna touch you
I wanna
I wanna do things with you
I wanna go places with you
I wanna go….
I wanna
I wanna
I wanna go places with you 
I wanna
I wanna see you 
I wanna
I wanna experience you 
I wanna
I wanna be about you
I wanna 
I wanna know how it is you do
I wanna see you
I wanna
I wanna see you
I wanna see you
I wanna
I wanna be about you

Sketches of Belle Skinner (i wanna be about you)

Love in the time of plague
I count seconds I count days I make eggs I turn the TV on I stretch my legs 
I turn the TV off I turn the TV off 
Love in the time of plague 
I get undressed I go to sleep I go to sleep
Loving the time of plague
I turn a page It takes ages 
Space erasure glaciers over and over and over 
I wait for daylight I spit up lace 
Six o’clock dinner time colander-neckbrace
Love in the time of plague
Play it for me play it for me 
Play it back
//
There’s a hole in the donut of my heart, 
There’s a hole in the donut of my heart, in the donut of my heart
It’s a foul magenta, a foul magenta that lives inside the heart, the donut of the heart
Oh it's a cold pink, a cold pink and it lives inside the heart, it lives inside my heart
Love in the time of plague, love in the time of plague! 
Yes, there’s a hole, a hole in the donut of the heart, in the donut of my heart 
OH there’s a hole, a hole in the donut of the heart, in the donut of my heart 
I look at the heart, it looks back at me
I think about the heart and it thinks about me
I look at the hole, I look inside the hole
It’s a foul magenta that looks back at me
It’s a cold pink looking back at me
It’s the love of plague staring back at me
Its the TV looking at me
I turn it off
It looks at me
I turn it on     .
It’s a hole, a hole in the donut of the heart, in the donut of my heart 
It’s a hole, a hole in the donut of the heart
A hole, a hole in the donut of the heart, the heart, my heart
A hole, a hole
But maybe, but maybe it’s supposed to be there?

Love in the Time of Plague // Holes in the Donut of the Heart

i want to compress myself

I want to lay in the beach of your soul
I want to lay in the beach of your soul
I want to hold your hands and grow old
I want to lay in the beach of you soul

SOULSURFER

Gas flames together with the flames of the holy spirit
Cash gains, whatever, my name through your incoherence
Dance maims the guests' games they exclaim “that rolley’s peerless” 
Gas flames together with the flames of the holy

Death wears sunglasses, I wear Louboutins. 
A hair’s breadth of absence removes me from where I belong. 
A long straight highway, I cry from the exertion
A bleached blonde beckons my way, I give into the coercion. 
A reassertion. you beat me up: Mike Tyson.
I sucked up to you always: a freshly bought informercial Dyson.
An acid burn on my tongue, Lay’s salt and vinegar
I’m high and I’m lost, I broke the altimeter.

Sickness wears flip-flops, I wear Chanel. 
Pest and plague wear jean jackets, I open up my mail
I gorge on McDonald’s, Carl’s Jr., and cash bail
The Burning womb of America lasts in the liberty bell

Money is more important than people

FLAMES of the HOLY SPIRIT

Sitting in the parking while you’re combing out your hair
And you’re smoking cigarette and I don’t even care.
We drive as it gets dimmer. I don’t know how to feel,
When a firefly’s fleeting shimmer ends its life on my windshield.

THE WINDSHIELD

(CHORUS) Baby you’re a front runner c’mon suck my soul 
Go take me to the city, c’mon show me rock n roll 
And roll with me c’mon suck my soul,  
that same soul that you stole from me  
You’re a front runner c’mon suck my soul 
Go take me to the city c’mon show me rock n roll 
And roll with me 
C’mon suck my soul, that same soul you stole from me  

Baby I’m stunner I make it in my hole 
Full of novel trepidation, 
I forget about my goals 
just roll with me 
Roll the dice and spice up that little show for me  

Baby how I wonder, oh I wonder what to do 
I spend all my evenings just dreaming after you  
It’s mind bending  
I take the opportunity to try to see if I can end it  

CHORUS

Baby you’re a front runner, run so far in front of me 
I try to keep myself from going under your canopy 
I stare at the windows and stand against the wall 
I sit myself inside a barrel, I go over Niagara Falls 

 I know that I’m a stunner, I know exactly who I am  
But why’d you have to take my soul and then go on lam  
Baby you’re out of focus, I kneel at your disposal 
Stick a gun into my mouth and call it a proposal. 

CHORUS

SOULSUCKER

Charli notice me
(watch the music video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6R-fOQbzbzo)

Charli XCX - 3AM (Pull Up) - (DJacob Remix)

Dee-Jacob. 
Musical mixmaster, like-lizst-on-the-keys, and producer extraordinaire.

DJacob

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