one too many times like u ran outta chances
every living being has a different type of cancer
i always think about you while im writing down these stanzas
and i wish that i could back to the place in the old cameras
time goes by when you live your life in fear
you said u want a man to come and wipe away your tears
your starting to hate life and you drain away your years
but i hate that youre away and i wish that you were here 
now im all alone and my babys gone away
rain above my head every mornings always grey
speak before i think when i dont know what to say
but im always on your side ill be there with no delay
the eyes of golden pearls and the beauty of a swan
i miss you more than ever before now that your gone
i want to feel your presence in a brand new dawn
but you manifest a future that is far beyond want


couple years past and im always on the run
tryna find the only perfect girl under the sun
didnt know id miss you this much and now im stunned
theres no one else above you ive been tryna find the one
theres alot of things that i still dont comprehend 
i hope that when i die i dont live this life again
in another cycle we dont have to play pretend
everyday is all the same is this ever gona end

rainmusic (neofantasia)

i cant seem to shake this feeling 
by myself im losing hope
i tried bout every remedy
cant concentrate enough to cope
i dream of u when sleeping in
i feel your shadow creeping in 
i know you see right thru my lies
i see your face in perfect skies 
the moon is out its cold tonight
you look ur best in lunar light
i fooled you once you fooled me twice
a snake inside a sheeps disguise
theres no one else youre always mine 
you caught me at the perfect time
but everyday is all the same 
its been a while the sun aint shine
to be in loves a losing game
i wish i could but im afraid
of witnessing a better life
ill pierce your heart and twist the knife 
i need someone to break the cycle
need someone worth dying for 
im headed down an empty spiral 
youre the one worth crying for
i fall for your lustful deception 
your eyes are like a lethal weapon 
the day i die’s a new beginning 
awake again my resurrection

deception (reinahara+tkk)

burning in the water
and im drowning in the flames
of your captivating love
ive forgotten my own name
ian never been the same
everyday is always rain
and i couldve loved you better
im the only one to blame
money and the fame
but im always feeling pain
and im getting sick of you
getting sick of all ur games
while i gaze up at the moon
all i see is us in love
and i hope to see you soon
if theres a heaven up above
i cant forget about you
cuz you fit me like a glove
you were all i ever needed 
now i lost my only one
always see your smile 
when im looking toward the light
we can be forever 
but you always wana fight
and i knew you were the one
from our very first sight
now shes happy in the day
and shes lonely by the night

blamegame (kubelis)

she think im her savior im nothing like batman
yurkcd made the beat bumpin shit ona bandlab
she tired of me she dont like my behavior 
love hate relations i feel like xavier 
my life is a mess ion know where im going 
the fuck is a clip ian heard bout reloadin
my vision goes blurry my soul is corroding
its been bout a week n the barrel still smokin
brainwash pack n i feel like im floatin
did it myself never paid for promotion
i been thru it all n im outta emotion
how we in love and there aint no devotion
my new hoe a witch n im sippin on potions 
im losing my mind and i feel like a madman

ssavior (yurkcd)

fog inside my head i dont know what to think
brand new hoe she messy like the kitchen sink
when i leave this earth i dont know where ill go
i might leave this world dying all alone
i got the blood of satan in my styrofoam 
i signed my soul away for gucci prada chrome 
try to look away from all this cloudy smoke
ur plug is stuck wit mids cuz he went hella broke
they thinking im a priest i got a sable coat
krucify my body never let me float
ill come and curse your name when i become a ghost
ill move as quick as time just like a lightning bolt
if u all alone baby girl just let me know 
smoking bayou weed got me movin slow
ill never be the same i dont wan hit an all time low
the more you maifest, the more you learn and grow

vampiric (kubelis)

if i ever get to see you again
i wouldnt give myself a second chance
i wouldnt ever stop and just forget
that i couldve been better to you
if i ever get to know you again
i would hope you look at me the same
i wouldnt ever take your love for a phase
ill be running on back to you
running against the wind

wind

i can tell ur dying baby show me how it works
trapped inside my mind again im back to feeling worse
she say she wan do better she dont ever wana learn
baby dont enhale the smoke from all the bridges that i burn
you put me in a trance with your piercing eyes of stone
the scars will last forever when ur bleeding to the bone
hang me by a noose i expect some bad karma
walk round wit a blade to my right im armed and dangerous
you used to be my world now we act like total strangers
its been forever baby i forgot your facial features
im knowin that u hate me and you cant deny your seether
time is flying by and our love is growing deeper
everytime im on the plane all i think about is you
i wish that i could be there but theres nothing i can do
you invade my head with thoughts and its stopping me from healing
i miss you but i hate you i dont know its just a feeling

severed (neofantasia)

anti every person i feel better all alone
i feel stranded by myself i need a place to call my home
you said youd ride or die for me but now i feel betrayed
he think he found the one but his girl on my front page
co ed co ed killer im pulling up witout a mask
made it outta limbo ian never goin back
made it out the slums now im reekin like some pack
she took a couple hits n she gon catch a heart attack 
semi auto shooter and im killing like its half life
if u really wana be me i suggest you get that bag right
learned a couple lessons i keep stackin money long
fearful by the sight but i wont ever do u wrong

animalcrush.m4a

the thought of yous nostalgic i cant get you off my mind
im all you ever wanted let me take you for a ride
my soul is getting drained and ive never been so blind
im stranded in a blizzard and i need to find a home
been through hell and back just to come alive with nothing
paranoid from shadows tailing you engulfed in guilt
my lifes a hurricane everyday it always rains
the frost is slowly melting when you take away my pain
your flame is burning brightly come and put my light to ash 
the waves of different stories smolder like a burning ember
the older that i get the more im able to remember
the things i wish i did feels like my heart is being severed
you can be my sacrifice so meet me at the temple
baby youre a devil sent from cupid up above
can we stop the struggle and continue acting stupid 
leave my corpse to rot away decaying a alone

somber

wish i were dead
its all in my head
follow your blind faith
youre being mislead
wish i were dead
i need to be alone
becoming unknown
ill never trust again 
wish i were dead
i envy you care
we all feel the burden
of breathing in air 
wish i were dead
i hate that im different 
i hate that i need
i hate that i want
wish i were dead

unknown

the plot thickens 
on christmas 
when people dont get they wishes
theres always flaws in a plan
why cant you just understand 
some people are what they eat
they never get up and clean
just sit and watch the tv
and getting killed in their sleep
im tryna carve my own lane
im feeling all sorts of pain
why wouldnt i want you to know
youre what i wanted and more
but you just cant comprehend 
the recent loss of a friend
or someone closer to you
that wouldve went to the end
fuck all the places i been
cuz i just wan be a kid
its getting hard to defend
im stuck in that place again
you only learn from experience 
cancers a term of endearment 
did a tree really fall
if no ones there to have heard it
i really think you deserved it 
but you cant see it from my side
so think about your own future 
before you wana be my bride

im tryna carve my own lane
im feeling all sorts of pain
why wouldnt i want you to know
youre what i wanted and more
but you just cant comprehend 
the recent loss of a friend
or someone closer to you
that wouldve went to the end

cannibal (colt5n)

into the night
resurrect your soul
into the night 
my conscience burning whole 
the cloud above my head
perpetual rain that falls 
i hope that when im dead
satans the one that calls
i see you in my dreams
my bleeding wounds are healed
the heavens blinding beams
i hope that my words can heal you

actions speak louder than words 
words that are meant to be heard 
stuck in a state of decay 
trapped in a planet of hurt

wounds

can you see me 
i feel like a shadow of guilt
will you notice if i 
built an empire completely out of stone
will you notice if i 
moved to a place that was
far away from home
i wonder when youll notice me
you didnt even look at me once
you make me feel like a dunce 
thats lost all hope for himself

dunce

prod @xeria+@dannygesko

reanimated cadaver 
out for blood like mad hatter
put me on the front of thrasher
i brought my board a lethal weapon
her lucky numbers 7
she gon cheat im already knowin
i bent the block goin 80 
cuz im whippin ina stolen
working in the graveyard like im playin nacht der untoten
the way im chaining smoke its like my mind and bodys floating
i called the plug pull up and told him give me the most potent
but it is what it is aint no sugar coating baby
bitch i got the sauce the fucking bread and all the gravy 
youve been my parasite like ive been coming down with scabies
you could be my shooter ian tryna have no babies
even though we never talk i always worry bout ur safety
i stay up til the morning and im always feelin lazy
ill slide thru broad day leave the scene i left no casings
pulled up to the function and im already super wasted
i passed around the blunt already knowin that i laced it
i show up in ur dreams im the being of your nightmares
i been sent from hell to burn i dont need ur fucking prayers
i dont think ill ever go a single night without a night terror
if you lived inside my mind then you would smell the guilty air

nacht der untoten (xeria+dannygesko)

prod me 

tell me what you want from me
im way too blind by empathy
youre love is what agravates me
jealousy in the first degree
blinded by hallucinations 
see through whats reality
my bodys decomposing
and my heart bleeds uncontrollably 

stranded in a cloud of smoke
my tears and crys have lost their meaning
look at what you did to me
my brain and thoughts are on the ceiling 
hatred takes a twisted turn
erase all that you learned from me
i hate the way i yearn for you
theres no way you can silence me

hallucination

i talk myself to a corner
my head said ill be a goner
if i don’t pull it together 
my heart might just explode
i hate that you still remember
of what we did in december
i just keep talking myself
into a deeper grave
my love for you is eternal
i lack all feelings fraternal
im not a stranger to love
you gave me some kind of hope
i wish you just understood 
the feelings that i withstood 
with you just being apart of my life

deeper grave

all i ever need
is the gun thats by my hip
i judt want to bleed
bleed like a busted lip
im so paranoid 
with a knife thats by my side
my life is but a void
how i die i cant decide
i fly from state to state 
youll never catch me in one place
my mind is filled with hate
and my soul has gone to waste

train museum

ill be there in your dreams
like i always am tonight
hoping you still care
and to leave you mortified 
you hate me to my core
but i still want you for myself
my mind waits for the moment
ill be haunting you tonight

haunt you tonight

why
have i 
become what i hate 
i trap myself in a tomb
that way i have no escape 
from my thoughts
blind
alone
afraid
and lost
i dont see a future
and i dont see a reason
youre forcing my hand
i start give myself lesions
for you
cutting my skin
i love to bleed my soul
rotting by your lonesome
and youre starting to mold 
again

lesions

cold is a feeling not everyone gets to experience (1ntcart)

lets have a shootout like new vegas 
in his face he not gon say shit
live my life just like a vagrant 
i got all kinds of different flavors 
told her check the menu name it
go head tell my momz i made it
steady living on the run
because im hated in the nation
fuck first date im never dating
check the score and up my rating
she wont believe her eyes
when shes a sacrifice to satan
told this hoe that i need payment
all my brains all on the pavement
cuz im movin like an agent
this shit really entertainment 

told her snap a picture frame it
im throwin up the deuce
she say why i live so dangerous 
baby what i got to lose
told this hoe that i dont love her
found her hangin on a noose
and im thinkin like im next
bcuz she was my only muse 
babe im always feel throwed
i put a hex on who u know
and ill never get away
i dont know which one to chose
girl im always so perplexed 
i start to lose my train of thought
we can bleed our souls together
pray to god we dont get caught

new vegas (coldwex)

pop a bottle of a sake
got her feelin in the mood
your regrets are whats eclipsing 
got her prayin to the moon
she aint knowin how to move 
i told her move it to the groove
gave her lines of foreign juice
baby make your body loose
between a knife and love for life 
i dont know which one to choose
when i bleed its all profuse 
left my brotherhood confused 
when my other baby left 
i had nothing else to lose
just sit alone and rot away
poppin bottles of some booze
told her read between the lines
it aint exactly what it seams
sick of all this paranoia 
seein you in all my dreams
tryna search for a new home
kickin back with all the fiends 
waiting til im all alone
then ill die by the machine
when the light slowly fades
baby fall into my arms
hope i spend forever with you
always staring at the stars
hoping that u feelin safe 
baby show me all your scars
we can leave this earth forever
spend eternity on mars
we could spend forever waiting
for the moon and sun to fall
dont forget bout what i told u
keep ur head up standin tall
i dont know a thing at all
but just give my phone a call
ill try my best to ease ur pain
have a shoulder through it all

golden hour (11azriel)

losing faith in myself because aint nun make me happy
youll never know my thoughts because ill take em to the grave
cut another wrist so ima add it to the tally
so just let me be alone cause ian tryna be saved
another day alone is just another day in paradise
i could tell you all the stories of a soul that’s gone to waste
this hoe wana save me and she wana be my sacrifice 
delusion takes a toll and now my memories erased
if you never lost your heart then you wont understand my pain
isolation is the only time i really feel alive
theres fog inside my head and i struggle to remain
and i havent gotten better will i make it out alive 
every day im falling deeper in a hole i cant get out of
i need someone to free me from this constant lonely cycle 
take away all my regrets if theres a heaven up above
forgive me at my lowest it was only for survival

will i make it out alive?

semi auto in the winter
baby shootin when i shoot
it aint phase me at all
ill keep doing what i do
you wont ever get a chance to live
by playin by the rules
so just lay back and relax 
breathin in exotic fumes 
girl my lungs are running dry
and ur love is all i need
hope that u can only see
u the only one for me
girl if only i could fly
id take a trip around the moon
never be so sentimental 
i dont know which one to chose
baby girl lets make a truce
i dont know how far ill go
say she dont believe in karma 
now u reapin what u sow 
its too late to change ur mind
im steady trappin out the portal
my girl patient number 9
and i feel like im immortal

patient #9 (sprintsaver)

when i walk thru its on sight
steady bleeding thru the night
baby youre my kryptonite
i keep my stick aint tryna fight
baby drugs is all i know
baby juice is all i love
drinkin pints that go down rough
til i pass out on the floor
always keeping to myself
the world is fuckin up my health
dont give a fuck bout whatchu think 
fuck a bb simon belt
decorating round the block
he gon fuck round and get knocked
all yall do is pillow talk
u think i give a single fuck
girl my life is all a blur
ill teach u everything i learned
sick of always layin low
i needa hello kitty hoe
rollin deep all thru the nation
told her dont u test my patience 
when i stay up til the morning
give myself hallucinations 
keep it real aint never faking
smoke my weed like IM jamaican 
tryna get u all alone
ill never fold im built off smoke

katarina (jeng4)

on the very first christmas
you up and left
i thought to myself well ill be onto the next
you came to my arms
in need of dire help
in the smallest inconvenience like a snowman you melt

the first christmas since you left
feels colder than before
stumbling through snow
to find myself a cure
you knew the perfect way to skate around my heart
slowly melting into my arms

melt

ROTP (lakeside)

armada

crying diamonds (scum)

written and composed by me
for listening purposes only
originally planned for Genesis (2025)

sin creek interlude prod me

CAMPCRYSTALLAKE

gutter (sh1nky+chinapoet)

originally planned for Depravation Degradation EP (2025)

ecstasy

shes christ im satan #2k26 im coming after u

i dont trust no one
i keep shit to myself
no one give a fuck
if i do shit to myself
i stay up til the morning 
that shit bad for my health
im always so secluded 
lock me up in a cell
keep ah ak47
in case shit start gettin rough
i cant date a hoe
who dont do shit for herself
i cant love a hoe 
whos a diamond in the rough
throw me in a cell
and im callin out ur bluff
all black boots
stomp him out for acting tough
he gon come round for the safety
he wont get a single puff
she gon come round she want me
i wont show her any love
cuz i hate my fuckin brain
i cant ever do enough
ur brother died for nun
thats what u get for acting tough
my brother took yo shit
go get that shit up back in blood

god tried to save me but he failed miserably (shishastopsippin)

prod me

she wan be my grave
i brought her down to misbehave
i been tryna get away
from all the guilt that you create
sacrificial love 
i never been the one to date
tryna keep my distance from you
save yourself before its too late
nothing stays the same
i learned that from an early age
baby im your crystal sage
the one to rid you of your pain
she dont wan be saved
shes used to being so alone
when i speak i speak right through her 
cuz she high off methadone
told her leave her phone at home
i know my way around these woods
i took her to a place
to be alone with all her thoughts
and i put my trust in her
all she did was go and bury it
all the weight you make me carry
i hate your guts in every waay

where is laura palmer

produced, written and composed by me
listening purposes only

stop the bleeding

everybody knows this is nowhere
ig @solacewizard

bloodlustmord

Pinned to spotlight

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