(Music and lyrics by me.)

I went down 31st Street,
get me a jug of alcohol,
I went down 31st Street,
get me a jug of alcohol, oh yes,


I said don't you put no water,
didn't put in a drop at all,


Well,I sure like whiskey,
my baby sure like gin,
the little girl I got right now
sure put me in the mess I'm in,
I went down 31st Street,
get me a jug of alcohol, oh yes,


I said don't you put no water,
didn't put in a drop at all,


Well, whiskey make me drowsy,
and gin'll make you think,
the common cold'll kill ya
but it was a woman who made me drink,
I went down 31st Street,
get me a jug of alcohol, oh yes,


I said don't you put no water,
no he didn't put in a drop at all,


Well, I was walkin' down Main Street,
and who do ya think I see?
He was all dressed up for Sunday
but I could tell he was the chief o' police,
he said, "Hey there young lad,
what you got in that brown paper bag?"


Well, he raised the bottle to his lips,
he said, "Gee, that's the best whiskey I ever had!"


Oh, well, hey there bartender,
why don't you hear me call?
oh, well, hey there bartender,
you don't listen to a thing at all,
I said, hey there bartender,
why don't you hear me call?


Don't want Jonny Walker,
no, I won't complain at all.


Oh, well, hey there bartender,
just gimmie somethin' strong,
I don't care what it is,
I don't care if it's short or long,
I said, hey there bartender,
I don't care what it is at all,


So, I raised out my glass
and he poured me a glass... of ethanol.

Home Recording

Too Much Alcohol

Messed up the chorus a bunch of times but it was fun and this was the first take.
(Music and lyrics by me.)

The lights along the highway,
they all roll along like ripples,
brandy on a broken heart turns a
drunk into a cripple,
ain't no road that leads away from love,
it's only lost with time,
better guzzle days like gasoline
'fore you skid across the line,

You hit the road,
you never known that,
the whole globe, 
just spins like a dice,
You hit the road,
you never known that,
every mile is paid with a price,

Just slip by another Sunday,
Foodman, give us daily bread,
can't run away from memories,
there's a pileup in your head,
there's roadworks on tomorrow,
the line's comin' up behind,
fuel gauge runnin' low, you know,
but don't pay it any mind,

(chorus)

Got whiplash from the weekend,
got a flat from Friday night,
must be blinded by the lights
you think she gone patch you up tonight,
can't give you nuthin', man,
man, you runnin' on fumes,
a headache's what you call it
but that's what WE call the blues,

(chorus)

The Highway, Man

1 guitar and a loop pedal. Recorded 2015.

Starry Sky (Instrumental). 2015

HAPPY BACK TO THE FUTURE DAY!

In another life I was part of a radio show called Grey Matters. There’s nothing much left of it now. The remnants survive like old pictures at the bottom of a dusty draw in an empty house. The above is a jingle I made for the “Time Machine” feature in 2013. The samples are from the first Back To The Future movie.

Grey Matters - Time Machine Jingle

A Mogwai / Smashing Pumpkins inspired instrumental. Recorded 2012

Bass - Jack Charter
Guitar - Me

Mogwaiesque (Instrumental). 2012

The day after Halloween I asked my friend for some words. He said, "Garter tin." "What the hell is that," I said. "It's like a tin you keep garters in." Hense the title of this song. Some other friends named a key and gave me a few lines to improv off. By the end of the day, it became this naughty number.

LYRICS:
Won’t you gimmie my / Garter tin?
Thing I keep my memories in.
Gotta get my / shit together,
tickle your bits / with my feather,

Ohhh, Ohhh

My mother says to / burn the witch,
she’s always tryin’ a’ make me / flip that switch.
But I like to keep you / nice and close,
a garter keeps so much longer than a rose.

Ohhh, Ohhh

Won’t you, come up stairs so we can talk just us?
Take your clothes off let’s get a little rough,
I wanna, feel your body / break against my skin,
hear you sing just like a broken violin.

Ohhh, Ohhh

I gots to, save my soul from a synagogue of sin,
but those legs gonna fucking do me in.
Won’t you carve me a moon so I can see right through the night?
I know your sex won’t work / but it just might.

Ohhh, Ohhh

Garter Tin

Louis 'Headless' Austen – Vocals and rhythm guitar.
Me – Lyrics, lead, bass and backing

LYRICS –

CHORUS:
And the rain falls down,
On this broken town,
And the rain falls down,
On this old fair ground,

VERSE:
And the sky grows dark,
Umbrellas in the street,
I'm waiting for my baby,
'Cos it's cold and I cannot sleep,
And the crows grow older,
And shower in the rain,
And all the children's dreams are
rusted to this frame,

CHORUS

VERSE:
Well Granny's in her socks,
And Pop's is by the fire,
The wind is howling at the door
And the cold will not tire,
And the backyard has been taken,
And the weeds have grown out,
And the flowers are all buried now,
And the sky begins to shout,

CHORUS

VERSE:
Well the snow has turned to grey,
And the wellington's go on,
And all the heating's cracked up,
And you suffer all night long,
Well, the whiskey keeps me warm,
Yeah, I feel it right away,
And the winter settles down to sleep,
Where the children cannot play,

CHORUS

Rain (w. Louis "Headless" Austin) . 2012

All music and lyrics by me (As you can hear, I'm no lead guitarist).

LYRICS:

It's been 5 months of love,
4 nights of pain,
before you get enough write a poem with my name,

collect me like a memory,
the gilded knife of prayer,
like a thousand broken lovers weaved by magpies in your hair,

I said I didn't know it,
but I sure had been told,
I wanna break your rule instead of fold into the mould,

if you kept something sentimental,
don't you wear it like a jewel,
shining in the face of your next valentines that's a different kinda cruel,

there's one more stale bottle,
of beer left on the wall,
99 empty excuses that you leave me when you call,

no, we can't talk in private,
why don't you meet me on the train,
we can slather all our problems on it like a stranger in the rain,

if you scared about getting close,
don't you leave me on the shelf,
I'm another lucky penny won't you spend me in good health,

just leave me, tied up in you bed,
like a childhood belief,
after giving your love to me ain't no other kinda peace,

CHORUS:
- Love is so hard,
- don't you know? Goddamn!
- I gotta go, gotta go, gotta go, now,
- while I know we still both understand,


All your bad times gather up,
you still living like a spark,
burning the candle at both ends blowing smoke rings in the dark,

well, your eyes are speaking to me,
trying to tell me of the present,
lit up like neon night signs slurring in florescence,

let's build ourselves a castle, 
shape it with our hands,
and piece ourselves together watch it slip away like sand,

I wanna give it all up for you,
it only took me til the noon,
but the things that you wanted were as changing as the moon,

you ask 20 things from me,
19 more to count,
I ask 1 thing from you: love me like it counts,

if you wanna wind me up,
you gotta let me go,
don't be that spider trying to spin me for a joke,

mine's a smooth devotion,
you can sooth against the pain,
you's a hot narcotic just slammed into the veins,

don't you colour yourself blue,
outta things we might have shared,
it's just cupid playing games no he never plays 'em fair,

CHORUS x2
(SOLO)

Don't you take back a thing,
don't you deal any blame,
anyone who tries gone find out just the same,

ain't no picnic, baby,
there's insects in the fruit,
trying to creep back around catch us in a loop,

dress up all our tomorrows,
tie them with a bow,
throw 'em to the wind let them drift away like snow,

drain the blood from my body,
paint it on your lips,
it's so cold outside won't you leave me with a kiss,

with your pocket full of sand,
trick bag full of blow,
you sure ready for the night, I gotta practice for the show,

you all Brahms & Liszt,
I'm 2 or 3 behind,
but I can't catch up 'cos you 9 days in the grind,

I always buckle up from,
those stories that you tell,
tattoo your tales on me before you utter your farewell,

pour your ink on me, baby,
before my bones turn black,
I give you everything and more, I'll never take it back

CHORUS x2

(OUTRO)

5 Months Of Love

Music and lyrics by me.

It’s a castration, 
A sensation, 
I don’t need no left wing sorted invitation,

This ain't no town, 
Yeah locked down,
 Ain’t no cigarettes, breath mints, skinflints left around,

Don’t make me wait, 
I get upset, 
Well, you may as well shoot me down or just put me to bed,

If mama don’t ask, 
Then papa don’t get, 
It’s a sad old circle that keeps on sinking in,

Ain’t no man free, 
Don’t beg and plead, 
Ain’t no concrete hand gone give you what you need,
–

If the bough don't break, 
There'll be no mess, 
Well, you're better off flying the coup or just leave the nest,

No woman gone pass, 
On your way back west, 
She done passed the torch for a cross and a little black dress,

It's gonna take work,
 To get out not hurt,
 If you leave they gonna claw you down & put you back on the curb,

Ain't no choice made,
 That can't be paid,
 If the city don't satisfy then you be on your way.
–

Be On Your Way (Locked Down)

Singer songwriter looking for funk / jazz musicians to collaborate with. Currently doing the one-man-band thing with a loop pedal. All lyrics available in the song descriptions.

Dok Sax

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