TaigaTonic as Kyle
EgoManic as Vasilis

Written by Elizalkin
Mixed by

Beat by King EF

Kyle vs Vasilis - Rap Battle!

ThanosQuack as Taka Takahiro
molliebdenite as Mr. Frog


Written by Elizalkin
Cover art by Elizalkin
Beat by Trunxks Beatz
Mixed by 

Special Thanks to garbageGothic, rosenthalfishes, TaigaTonic, Ficketyfoo M!CHA, CinnamonGhostCrunch, Rippilie, Zach Hadel, and Michael Cusack.

Dedicated to Man the Fish and Pubert.

LYRICS:

Taka:
Hello! I’m Taka, welcome to the show!
Today we got a very special guest you surely know..

Welcome Mr. Frog, happy to have you!
So my first question I’ll ask: are you ready to battle?

You became the president; I’m unprecedented
Ultimate TV Personality, have all attention!

Your show’s boring and plain, I created the trends!
I’m loved by my fans! Yours caused your career to end!

Why are you so evil? I’ve got the answer!
It’s cause you’re not sigma, and only cause disaster!

My time’s almost up, so let’s see if you can manage
To make it a verse without causing serious damage!

Mr. Frog:
Hello, I’m Mr. Frog. This is my verse!
I’ll eat the beat, and come home with a new Chrysler! 

Caught up in controversy, but I’ve no time for bigots
So tell that conductor, I’m not handing a ticket!

All your fans don’t care, wish that you died
They’d actually thank me if I ate you alive 

Cause you’re a bug i’m stomping!
You’re gross and little you hobbit!

So I’ll cut your profit!
Let your show burn!

And while you’re begging to stop it
I’ve guaranteed myself a second term! 

Taka:
You know you’re supposed to diss me right?
I did. FUCK!

My fans don’t care? You’re covered in scandals!
This is just the second time they’ve got your show canceled!

I’m gross? Well on that note
You ate a person and it stopped the cash flow!

You’re a terrible person and worst of all: a bore
Celebrities getting outed is just the theme of 2024!

Mr. Frog:
I’m getting outed? You’re a criminal dude!
You tampered with police evidence to get likes and views!

You slept with the fishes, and nobody cared
My fans were the ones to let me back on air!

Yeah I ate that dude it was awesome
But you’re a bitch, so you’re the least of my problems!

You’re just the next bug on my show, but reap the benefits!
At least you’re not here to tamper with the evidence!

Taka Takahiro vs Mr. Frog - Fangans vs Anything!

Happy Birthday Acexperts.

Elizalkin as Both
Mixed by
Beat by Anywaywell.

Lyrics:
Copernicus:
Hello, I’m Copernicus, I’m hurting this vermin 
Now, I’ve heard of him, but don’t worry he’s only creepy on the surface
He stalks the woods, looking for children to hunt as his prey 
I’ve seen worse up on Twitter, there’s really nothing more to say

However, I can elaborate on what I’ve said before
Who came up with you? Some random edgy kid on the internet who was bored?
Or was it the photo editor posting all that nonsense on the message boards?
But no matter who it was, it always ends up with your story being poor!
Ignore what I’ve said for now, lemme get a question out
Was your movie rushed out? Or was it bad - intentional? 
Why don’t you just leave, I don’t want my observatiatory a glitchy mess
And we all know how the story goes, you left in the Thick of It

Slenderman:
You’ve entered Slender’s forest, you’ve already decided your fate.
You’ll finally be up in the sky, ‘cuz you’ll die today.
You’re battling the sky-high stalker, specialized in cold-cases
You wanna make it out alive? COLLECT MY PAGES!

A tale as old as time, don’t let your children out alone
I’m crafting a new one, don’t let the nerds out in the battle zone 
I’ll crush your weak body, you’ll need attention - medical 
It won’t take much, I could do that with just one tentacle…
I’ve crafted my own pedestal, now I’ll stand on it
I’d say I stole the win, but you ain’t earn it, I won’t be robbin’
You’re getting silver, hope you got your money’s worth 
‘Cuz I lap circles around you, like the sun ‘round the earth

Copernicus:
I’m at a loss of words, were my discoveries useless?
It seems they still think wrong, oh it’s so putrid!
All that research wasted, what’s even the point?
All those restless nights for nothing, oh it all disappoints!
I will fight for my beliefs! I’ll defeat The Slenderman 
And even if I don’t, I’ll still die a happy man!
‘Cuz I’d have known I tried, and didn’t back out when it was too late 
So you’re right I’ve decided my fate, I’ll destroy everything Slenderman creates!

Slenderman:
You think you’re so tough. You don’t even stand a chance.
You’re dead as soon as you step foot on my land.
The fact you think you’ll destroy me shows it all
You’re the worst thing that I’ve seen in a forest, since Logan Paul
DON’T THINK YOU CAN RUN AWAY! NO YOU’RE ALL MINE
I’LL TURN YOU TO MINCE MEAT JUST FOR STEPPING OUT OF LINE
KNOW YOUR PLACE; NO ONE CARES THAT YOU’LL DIE
‘CUZ AS SOON AS I GET YOU, YOUR NAME WILL BE LOST TO TIME…

Slenderman vs Copernicus - Rap Battle!

Caine wants to know if he did well
Special thanks to the greatest person ever: frb biggest hater

The Dirty Bubble:
Back just like that! It’s the Dirty Bubble!
Boutta feel a world of trouble! So prepare to make rebuttals.
Just from the show alone, your writing disappoints.
Always talking nonsense, so there’s no need for fearing points!

I’m in my own league! I’m the best villain ain’t no doubt!
All these other lame bubbles they better get out 
And by that, I’m talking about you
Had one line in the most recent episode, and it blew!

Bubble:
Hi there, welcome to the Circus!
You’re trapped here. But how may I be of service?
You wanna go for versus? Mmm…. OKAY!
I’m about to pop off. Happy birthday!

(Who even likes you?) on the worst villains list, you’re not too far.
Where’d you get those lines from? The. The Barg N’ Mart? 
I played the Minecraft SpongeBob Race, and you failed
You should go to where you belong. Go to- jail.

The Dirty Bubble:
I may have lost the race.. but I won’t lose this!
The backwards speech you did, it was stupid!
Sure.. I’ll let you pop off. I'll stick a needle in.
You should just quit now, cuz I feel the win.

Bubble:
Fine. Goodbye.
(The shadow of Jax appears)

Caine:
Haha! I tricked you good didn’t I?
But since bubble left, I thought I’d give this a try!
You’re a parasite! You just completely made a mess!
I’ll poke you with a pencil! (Pop) Wait, who’s gonna clean this since Bubble left?
(thinking)

Oh I know! Zooble! *snap*



outro skit

Bubble: I’ll admit those lines were very villainous 
The Dirty Bubble: (silence because he’s so happy)

The Dirty Bubble vs. Bubble (TADC) - RAP BATTLE!

Glad I don’t live in the timeline where I finished this 🙏
Date Recorded: 7/17/24

Chiyo:
My name is Chiyo, but you should call me Senior Mihama
Seems you wanna be beat bro, gladly cuz we got a problem 

Seeing you wanna fight puts me in a state of bliss
Cuz you’ve a habit of being beat by little kids!

Woooh! Nobody likes you! They want you gone all the time!
Get beaten on more than I do, you cannot keep peace of mind!

Don’t even grab the mic! It’d be best for you to flee!
Not even worth a try, so make like what all of us want; and leave

Sheldon:
You’re putting up a weak fight, not calling you senior i’m much older so,
I guess you’re right, but I don’t recall being crushed by a boulder though..

I’ve also a smarter mind, you’re no prodigy, that’s reasonable 
And your comics, i’d say are the only ones not readable!

They’re exactly like your teachers; a bad influence!
Not just that, they’re boring, I couldn’t get into it!

Your creator’s abandoned you, your ship’s sailed
He’s detached from you: just like your pigtails!

Chiyo:
Wow. That was your best, huh?
I say you should make like your dad’s heart; give up

Throughout my life, some funny stuff, i’ve seen some
But your whole show is a joke, bazinga!

There was no reason to make your show, c’mon tell me different 
All of it is slop, while i’ve the cutest scene on television!

Sheldon:
Like Tomo with your keys, your chance of winning was thrown away!
This is just another way you’re getting beaten, it’s all the same

Don’t talk about my father, yours only exists in Sakaki’s brain
And Ayumu’s too, their dreams are all you’ve got of him! 

Your book is the worst of slice of life, that’s all I see
So I’ll leave them to collect dust, like Wallaby

(SCRAPPED DEMO) Chiyo-Chan vs. Young Sheldon - Rap Battle!

audio will not get finished. i don’t feel like it.

written by elizalkin.
art by creeperpasta.
cover art by elizalkin.
demo by elizalkin.
beat by david arcade.

lyrics:

It’s the best Vocaloid: Name? Kasane Teto
I lied I’m a UTAU, but that’s not important 
I’m the best at singing, I think you should forfeit 
Plus I’m a chimera so you know I’m the goat 
It’s a 3v1, I’ll hit you with the Triple Baka
You shot the president, and it’s never really brought up
Convince me you're a real character? Stop trying it! 
This ain’t Disney man, I ain’t buying it!

I’m Graggle Simpson! The best one in the family 
You’ll never reach Miku’s height really it’s a tragedy 
Speaking of them, like 9/11 that verse we’ll never forget 
You messed up so hard, I think you should forfeit!
Don’t fuck with the Grag, I’ll empty this mag 
Yes I shot the president now I’m killing this- 
Grandpa was made after me, I’m better than this copy
Spit so hot, Mr Burns thought we should block me

You’re not better, I was made a SynthV
You’re a dead meme, never made officially!
It’s a joke they’d make too man, that’s sad!
Writers have fallen off harder than Bart going to Japan

Don’t say that shit around me again.
I’ll JFK you, what else would you expect 
Graggle the Simpson just left your broke ass left for dead 
Favorite food is baguettes cuz’ it’s the only way you’ll make bread

Kasane Teto vs. Graggle Simpson - Rap Battle!

LYRICS:

Pink Sauce has entered the building!
Walmart’s the building, you know imma kill it 
I ain’t heard of your game; what’s the meaning of it?
Shadow Milk? Sounds like something from my ingredients list!

I been rolling in that green dough, you stuck with powder blue
You ain’t surviving the sauce expired milk gon be outing you
Power of Deceit? Man, I ain’t believing 
My initial reaction was “why not just eat him??.”

This shit say you inspired by milk? That’s lame
I read that off the wiki I ain’t gonna play your game
Looked at the other characters, felt like spot the difference 
Suffered from Same-Face Syndrome so they had to bring Sonic in it

Picked you up at Walmart, but I got weird looks
Deceit is right, I could convince you your product is good
Got so convinced your product is the shit, stop
Please yall, don’t buy nothing off of TikTok

Ask you to join my circus, but you’re a clown anyway
I don’t even watch you in the act, shut shit down like the FDA
Why am I battling a food? You boutta ruin my day
But I’m chasing that Clover Cookie, in other words I’m getting paid

Disgusting ass, sound like a recipe ChatGPT made
Randomly generated, someone tell Ego they stole his name??.
I’m done with this battle, just please someone get me home
Don’t need to get off your rocker, consumers already got them kidney stones

Shadow Milk Cookie vs. Pink Sauce

Thanosquack as Pac-Man
TheToppo as Cool Spot

Written/Cover Art by Elizalkin
Mixed by Kaewoo

Prod. ProductOfTha90s

LYRICS:
The Pac is back, and on a track!
I’m an icon, you’re a forgotten mascot that’s whack!
Battling The Pac is surely an accident 
I got kids, no time for your Toy Story shenanigans!
Only lasted ten years, I’ve been going strong for all mine
We’ve seen how tough I am for 45!
You’re battling crabs, I’m fighting ghosts daily!
Grown adult, but you’re weaker than Pac-Baby
You’re 3rd buddy, the competition’s ahead of you
While I’m still the greatest, we’re on different pedestals!
I’ve already won, you’re dead on arrival
Bring in the better mascot, come on Fido Dido!
 
*Cool Spot is coming off the can*

Off the can and I’m ready to fight you
You’re third too well back to that right soon
You losing fights comes up quite often
You can’t really fight, you’re all Toc-Man
Well I guess it’s a “Rap” Battle so I’ll let it slide
You got boxing gloves though, I won’t do that next time
Call me AtGames, I’ll tear apart your life
Beat you in the ring, I’ll even take your wife
Leave you talking incomprehensible - 256
Next verse will be like Adventures; you won’t release it!
Getting replaced too, C’mon we’re getting there
Miss Pac-Man came out, and now she's everywhere!

Your verse was an example: you can’t match my stuff!
And talking on my “Un” is for me and the misses, thanks very much
Come take me in the ring! You’re a dot, I eat em!
Lookin’ like a power pellet, even the ghosts are defeated!
You’re talking big but you can’t really do this
I’ll keep throwing things at ya, like Anubis!
So next time you feel like being weakened
You’ll be made like Orson, you’re getting eaten! 

Did Orson dirty, that was the end
Two games later, acting like you’re best friends
He just wanted to be liked, what’s wrong with you
Does being out of the spotlight bother you?
Nevermind that’s the answer for sure
When Mario dropped, bet the wrath was absurd 
But you’re old now, it’s time you grow up
You’ve become uncool - I’m the uncola!

Pac-Man vs. Cool Spot - Rap Battle!

Thanosquack as Pac-Man
TheToppo as Cool Spot

Written by Elizalkin
Mixed by Kaewoo
Beat by ProductOfTha90s

Pac-Man:
The Pac is back, and on a track!
I’m an icon, you’re a forgotten mascot that’s whack!
Battling The Pac is surely an accident 
I got kids, no time for your Toy Story shenanigans!

Only lasted ten years, I’ve been going strong for all mine
We’ve seen how tough I am for 45!
You’re battling crabs, I’m fighting ghosts daily!
Grown adult, but you’re weaker than Pac-Baby

You’re 3rd buddy, the competition’s ahead of you
While I’m still the greatest, we’re on different pedestals!
I’ve already won, you’re dead on arrival
Bring in the better mascot, come on Fido Dido!
 
*Cool Spot is coming off the can*

Cool Spot:
Off the can and I’m ready to fight you
You’re third too well back to that right soon
You losing fights comes up quite often
You can’t really fight, you’re all Toc-Man

Well I guess it’s a “Rap” Battle so I’ll let it slide
You got boxing gloves though, I won’t do that next time
Call me AtGames, I’ll tear apart your life
Beat you in the ring, I’ll even take your wife

Leave you talking incomprehensible - 256
Next verse will be like Adventures; you won’t release it!
Getting replaced too, C’mon we’re getting there
Miss Pac-Man came out, and now she's everywhere!

Pac-Man:
Your verse was an example: you can’t match my stuff!
And talking on my “Un” is for me and the misses, thanks very much
Come take me in the ring! You’re a dot, I eat em!
Lookin’ like a power pellet, even the ghosts are defeated!

You’re talking big but you can’t really do this
I’ll keep throwing things at ya, like Anubis!
So next time you feel like being weakened
You’ll be made like Orson, you’re getting eaten! 

Cool Spot:
Did Orson dirty, that was the end
Two games later, acting like you’re best friends
He just wanted to be liked, what’s wrong with you
Does being out of the spotlight bother you?

Nevermind that’s the answer for sure
When Mario dropped, bet the wrath was absurd 
But you’re old now, it’s time you grow up
You’ve become uncool - I’m the uncola

Pac-Man vs. Cool Spot (REMIX)

iGreenOwl as DJ Khaled
723freaky as Hitori Gotoh (Bocchi)

Hoodiemasterr as Drake

Written by Elizalkin
Mixed by Jort
Beat Prod. jibao & StoneSoWavy!

DJ Khaled vs. Bocchi the Rock - Rap Battle

Mark Scout:
Name’s Mark Scout, welcome to the office!
Little Bunny Foo-foo’s in my way, so imma off him
Here’s a rule: be respectful when you walk in
Wipe your feet when you step on the mint green carpet 

Alright I been waiting too long for this
I’m boutta kill Jax with this shit
Can’t surprise me, Trix are for kids
And you know that, I’m packing the blicks

And you know that imma tackle this bitch
And you know that I’m attacking rabbits
And you know that i’m actually rich
Glitch money don’t got nothing on Severance 

I am motherfucking Mark Scout!
You know I’m boutta make a mark now
When it’s Jax imma mark down
And then take out that clown!

Shit going down when Jax is my target
Keep that lucky foot, no I’m not sorry
Bitches got me acting re-
Fuck abstractions, i’m taking you off the market

Jax:
Wow. That’s certainly an introduction.
But that verse was trash, it’s time for reconstruction 
Went to Netflix and became a number one show
While you dropped on the only streaming service nobody owns!

Come here saying you’re gonna hunt me, bitch?
Nah that ain’t funny, bitch
Attacking you, don’t see it coming, bitch
I am digital Bugs Bunny, bitch!

Got confused watching the show
Read the wiki and I still don’t get it
What you’re about nobody knows
Watching your show is just a dead end

This battle was your worst mistake 
Sorry but you’re not winning today
Battling Jax? Better watch your temper 
Split you in half, leaving you severed 

What did you expect me to think of more lines?
I couldn’t think of anything I think I said all I wanted to

Mark Scout:
Alright that verse messed me up a bit
But you ran out of lines? What are you gonna do about the second?
Gunning you down, it’s fucking rabbit season
I just don’t like you don’t need a good reason

Run this battle like a leg race
Your slow ass would need a segway
Bitch you give me headaches 
You gonna die hope you’re ready

Rude to everyone around you
We don’t want you around dude
I’m saying bye bye, yeah salu-
Bang! Bang! I just put you in the ground dude

Now you’re finally gone and dead
Cured my headache, like Excedrin!

Jax:
Aw man, I gotta do this again?
Was hoping the first would be the only one
Now you’re walking around acting like I’m dead?
Come on Mark you’re ruining all the fun…

But I get it, I don’t like to lose either 
You used to be amazing, you were a history teacher!
If I were you I’d cancel the show, leaving it dead
If I’m little bunny foo-foo, I just bopped you on the head!

Jax vs Guy from Severence - RAP BATTLE!

Man Ray:
It’s Man Ray, best villain in the business
Keep raps great for the thrill of a quick diss
Can’t catch a mouse, ooh, that’s really tellin’
Threats are ‘bout as empty as under my helmet 

Well then, my victory’s non-negotiable
Keep the flow ready like a Gyarados or Wartortle
On blast against, weapons or Pokemon, the same game 
Leave James like Wobbuffet, can only say his name

Take my Ray Gun and blast through you
Mermaid Man’s retired so, I choose you!
Blasting off again! It’s the same with you misfits
Make like a Game Freak employee, and quit this

Team Rocket:
Prepare for trouble.. Make it double..
Cuz we’re gonna pop off like The Dirty Bubble!
All you E.V.I.L members are so utterly lame
We could catch you, but Boss would tell us “try again!”

Meowth, that’s right! You’re not even worth the fight!
But we’ll use you as practice to make catches multiply!
It’s too easy, aren’t there any better?
You’re right, to beat you all we’d need is a feather!

You’re not a villain! You’re merely an annoyance 
A sponge has a better chance to destroy us!
You’re little group E.V.I.L? That’s ours to take!
You’re such a goody two shoes you can’t even rob a bank!

Man Ray:
Like in all your other fights, you’ve missed
Try throwing better blows, that’s Red Mist
All your outfits are a sight for sore eyes
Instead of delivering lines, try a different disguise 

I’ll beat you cuz I don’t like Team Rocket
I stomp on foes like a box full of wallets 
Stop it, you better quit wasting my time
Or prepare yourself to die, cuz the victory is mine!

Team Rocket:
We always get back up after blasting off!
You can’t get back up after tartar sauce!
You can’t be a villain! You’re weaker than Wobbuffet!
(Wobbuffet!) Hey, that’s a compliment!

Stop fighting you two! Yeah, stick to the plan!
Cause we’ll finally win after this attack!
We’ll admit you did well, but you’re still not a winner
Your verses were like Bulbasaur - perfect for beginners!

CAST:
TheMonarchy as Man Ray

Vanes as Jesse
Clarence the Duck as James
MetaStarVA as Meowth

TheToppo as Babytron

CREW:
Written by Elizalkin
Prod. George Johnson
Mixed by Kaewoo
Special Thanks to Powerofdan, M&Mattie, and JustGamer

Man Ray vs. Team Rocket - Rap Battle!

MAN RAY VS TEAM ROCKET (DEMO)

jeff the killer vs ticci toby - rap battle!

CAST:
BadgerDryW4ter as Ticci Toby
Elizalkin as Jeff the Killer

CREW:
Written by Elizalkin
Beat Prod. Jee Juh Beats
Mixed by Kaewoo

LYRICS:

Toby:
It’s Ticci Toby! Here to serve ya!
Clock’s ticking so I’m open to murda!
Leave your body lost like your image, it’s over dude!
Slice you with my axe, leave you licking an open wound!

I’ve ties with Slenderman, you betta worry, kid!
I’ll burn up that face worse than those bullies did!
I’d say wipe that smile off your face, but you carved it, right?
Clown lookin’ ass, I’d kill my family too if I had those eyes! 

You’ll lose your life! So don’t step up to me, hold it back!
Or I’ll leave you headless next time you attack!

Jeff:
Go to sleep, cuz it’s clear you’re all bark!
Already beat Slenderman, his protégé won’t be hard!
Out of all my copycats, this one thinks that he’s all that?
False, so run away ‘fore I leave you as a blood splat!

12 long years, copycat killers wanna steal my spotlight 
But they fail, cuz I always outdo them in fights
Don’t call me clown man, your story got me Laughing Jack
But remember my other bullies, so watch your back!

Surrender the mic, and maybe I’ll give you a pass
But if you wanna fight still, just know I’m kicking your ass!

Toby:
Outdo me? Man, you gotta be kiddin’!
Your shit sucked so hard, it had to be rewritten!
And it was kicked off the wiki too, what’s up with that?
You’re Jeff the Kitten-soft, how are you gonna kick my ass?

Now you’re used only in screamers, you’re nothing but a bother!
You should surrender man, I’ll leave you like my father!

Jeff:
Stop acting tough, I bother you, correct?
Be honest, my verse left you shaken up like your Tourette’s!
You started mass murdering, but it almost lead to your death
Your story’s more fucked up than the shit inside your head!

Now Slenderman only worsened the state of your mind
But fortunately for you it’s time for bed, so good night..

JEFF THE KILLER VS TICCI TOBY

beat i made. all sounds made in vital (aside from drums).

ASTROO

Beat I created in FL Studio. Sample is from Sonic Lost World.

LOSTWORLDD

Beat I created in FL Studio. Sample is Teto Territory.

TERRITORY

ATARI 2600

i’m rewriting this one.

Nokotan:
Ay, it’s Nokotan!
I been riding on deer since before Elon, so get back in line
You can’t even write, so why are you here?
Bitch, you’d break the pen. Happy new year! (???)

I may be a deer, but I’m the goat
Like it’s Hanma blood, I got better flow
Soon you’ll learn I’m not someone to attack on
But given your last interactions, please keep your pants on

I been keeping watch over you like a space satellite 
Him and Weinstein should get fucked up in a cell for the rest they life
Your feats aren’t anything, deers can swim fast like you
If you really, really wanna fight me, then I’ll be happy to 

Yujiro:
Ha, ha, ha!  Don’t make me laugh!
You’re extremely weak, I’ll break this deer in half!
I’m super charged in rap, on the beat i’ll go full throttle 
They thought you were a worthy foe? You’re scared of water bottles!

I’ll use your antlers as a pen to write!
Watched your show, clearly you’re not good in fights
You’re super weak and fragile like Gelatin
I’ll fuck every deer in Nara Park if it means I can do you like the elephant 

I’m in my element! You couldn’t win, you’re selling it
After 2022, you’re not even relevant!
I now know my answer, when someone asks “what’s for dinner”
I’ll say “ we’re having deer with a side of apple fritters!”

Nokotan:
Okay, but I don’t even care at all (At all 🗣️🔥)
Lock you up for good because you’re an animal (derogatory 🗣️🔥)
I saw your wife, then I fucking slapped her (??)
You break and bleed so easily, i’ll call you deer crackers (FIRE 🗣️🔥)

And you fat as fuck, you fatass fucking oger
I already won, this battle is over!
I’m leaving because there’s no need for another round
But if you wanna do it then I’ll still be in town

Yujiro:
That verse just got banned, fucker i’m burning it
I’ll kill everyone in the deer club, like the tournament 
Fuck Oliver, number one spot, I’m earning it
You go to school but I never see you learning shit

(uh uh uh) I’m goated, that verse; you’ve blown it
You’ve blown it, yeah, like a roof out in the open
I just won, you didn’t need to leave
What’s a fucking deer god if I don’t even believe!

Nokotan vs. Yujiro Hanma (V1 DEMO)

LYRICS:

Rocket League:
Ay, pass the ball! Making y’all focus like Adderall
Making y’all stop the act and all, thinking you can Smash like Brawl
I mean Brawl like Smash, when it comes to spinoffs you not all that
All you’re good at is ruining good relationships like you were Jada Smith, yea

This crazy, the Mario Kart falloff is pretty harsh ain’t it?
Mario game ain’t ranked as high as Diddy Kong Racing
I been moving like Messi, most goated you ever seen
Your game just make players wanna throw their controller at the screen

I be making them goals, new games just worsen controls
Like why isn’t the drifting just part of the gameplay, bro?
Downgraded graphics, needed better support, right?
And if you say that you’re better, just looks who’s collabing with Fortnite

Mario Kart:
Wahoo! Just looking at games, shouldn’t be comparing mine and yours
Look in ten years, tell me who’s game is dying first?
I’m fun for all ages, you’re only played by teenagers 
No use in bringing up Fortnite, you need to bring up more players! (Let’s-a-go!)

Saying I’m not better than Kong? What’s all the comparing for?
Shouldn’t be talking, you’re just Fifa with Lightning McQueen as a DLC character!
That that money matters, but on that topic, number one spot is a steal
The money I’m making feels like your engine, it’s Unreal!

Yeah I downgraded graphics, but I did it to bring a bigger map
So, tell me what happened with you? I guess that you can’t!
I just make people mad, your players shout slurs from back and to hell
Your community is gonna take you off the top spot like a Blue Shell

MARIO KART VS. ROCKET LEAGUE - RAP BATTLE!

Rakeish as Cirno
GrimTeddy as Neptune
SomethingExtraVA as Purple Heart
Elizalkin as IF (Cameo) 💔

Written by Elizalkin
Beat by DillyDally
Mixed by HoodieMasterr
Art by ForgottenSon

LYRICS:

Cirno:
You don’t know who you’re fighting, so let me introduce
I’m Cirno; the ice fairy who’s about to school you!
With your current skill set, I’m not someone you can beat!
A bunch of corncob goddesses are nothing to me!

I’m the strongest when it comes to rhyming, you’re no challenge to me!
Defeat small fry like you daily, I’m a challenge to beat!
In a time like now, I feel it’s smart to leave this!
Make your verse like your SEGA console, and don’t release it!

Neptune:
I’d kill you with one verse, so imma start packing 
I’ll give you pudding if you win. Never mind I’m back in
You’re not a genius, really, you’re a time waster!
I’ll divide you in two, (yeah!) that’s an ice breaker!

Don’t need to use effort when fighting against you
I’ll just aim it at your head: Cirno shot dead in Planeptune!
You as a protagonist? Ehh, that doesn’t really suit
Ohh I get it, every other character is so much cooler than you!

Cirno:
(Pfft) I am the coolest! I’ll freeze you to death!
I’m not dumb at math, I’ll put that idea to bed, watch!
Your words won’t hurt me, your raps don’t bear fruit!
I’ll beat you and bury you; that’s a square root!

It seems you made it past that first line amazingly!
But you treated the rest like your other fights; pretty lazily
You shouldn’t have picked on me, *pause* cuz you’re a coward!
Won’t even try to fight, just use you to level up my ice power!

Purple Heart:
You should watch the way you speak, when you’re talking to a Goddess
You seem very cocky, I’m suggesting you stop it.
I am the Purple Heart! Ruler of Planeptune!
Nope! You can’t defeat me, I suggest you change that attitude!
 
You should try actually rapping, you’re just senselessly bragging
About some skills you don’t have, all of them are imagined!
So next time you wanna brag about how you almost had me beat
I suggest you stick to what you do best: freezing things!

(EARLY AUDIO) CIRNO VS NEPTUNE - RAP BATTLE

Elizalkin as Caine and Monokuma
Written by Elizalkin 
Beat by David Arcade
Poorly mixed by Elizalkin
Special Thanks to Egomanic

LYRICS:
Caine:
The name’s Caine and you that I’m the greatest
Judging from other Visual Novels: you seem like the tamest!
Cuz with your Pop Art aesthetics you’re not a dangerous problem
And if you’ve seen my other battle, you know that I pop off!

You know that Caine’s the best, I played your game, it’s a great mess
Got bad characters, bad games, and lots of bad ratings 
Junko created you cuz she was bored? That’s crazy!
It’s clear she’s abstracted so I’ll lock her in the basement

Monokuma:
Finished? Thank god, that verse was putrid!
I’ve found you guilty so it’s time for execution!
Unfortunately for you, there’s no exit for you sir
I’ll make like Alter Ego, when I’m crushing this computer!

BAM BAM! BANG BANG! Like there’s no tomorrow 
Cookie cutter plot, it’s like you bought it from Costco
Say my game is bad? You’re not one to talk bro 
Your plot just keeps going in circles like it was Mondo!

Caine:
Okay….. I don’t really care
You really think I’ll take threats seriously from a teddy bear?
Ending the world cuz it’s boring isn’t really fair
So I’ll bring the end to you too I’ll break this Build-A-Bear

Monokuma:
Calling me a Build-A-Bear? You look like a toy too you freak
I’ll spend a whole week knocking out your wind up teeth
From the other one and here, in battles you keep blundering
So I’ll put you out of that misery I’m done with your punishment

Elizalkin

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