Part 2 is heavy as fuck, and follows the stages of withdrawals, relapse, temptation, etc. This is just a rough draft it will be reuploaded with better quality soon

Part 2: conviction 

You live by the fire’s 
Euphoric attack, let go.
And pray, this time
That You’ll hold back. ‘Til now. 
Let go! 

Lay back, drift off

With a wisp of smoke
And a dilated eye
You illuminate the soul 
Tribulation or demise 
It’ll come back, no, yes,
It’ll come back, no
You can’t avoid it it’ll come 

Now look in to my eyes
And tell me that you’re free
Can’t mask the guilt
When ill at ease, but, 
I know a shred of life
Still resides in the 
paradigm of farce 
and gritted teeth 
You are a brother 
a loving son 
to be a father 
Refuted one
So stay the hand
Let loose the band 
Rebuild this broken home

This broken home
He’s alone

Red Eyes, go take your ride
Then falsify, the sweet’ll come
To harm you
Red Eyes, go and take your ride
Even higher now
With the birds and worms 
To realize they’ll take your life
Don’t fall too high
Or you’ll run too close to
Red Eyes it’ll take your life
And sign your flight
Don’t run too close to the sun

You are a brother
Beloved son
To be a father
Refuted one
So stay the hand
Let loose the band
Rebuild
This
Broken
Wisp of smoke 
And dilated eye
You illuminate the soul
Tribulation OT demise
It’ll come back
No, yes,
It’ll come back, no,
You can’t avoid it it’ll come

It'll break your mind
Oh god
And take your life
You are my brother
a loving son 
you'll be a father
I promise it goes away
But I need you to find
the strength to give
it all away if
you wanted out.

New Life Part 2: Conviction (rough draft)

This is part 1 of a 3 part song that I am doing called New Life. It's about the stages of addiction. Part 1 being the realization you're fucked, the loneliness, isolation, and everything that comes with it. 


Lyrics: 
Now when you sit by the fire
And it stares back
You cannot win
You only pray
That youll expire
Now turn your back to us,

You cannot win
You cannot win no

So close your eyes 
And Count to 10
Relive your life
Like you had wanted, no
You’ll never win
You’ll never win
You cannot win 
Cannot win no

Reach for an new life
Reach for a

I know you’ve struggled 
With the pain of
1,000 burning afflictions
All for what seems eternity
Those useless endeavors
Wont help 
To push back your fears 
And confide of it oh no
Sought the love
Of another to ease the flame 
A place to dwell
A place to lie and wait
You’ve lost so many 
Who have loved you
And we miss the stories they’d tell
Keep searching for 
The comfort of acceptance 
Long to feel the words 
You can’t hear anymore

New Life Pt 1: Affliction

Reupload. I’m still very new to pro tools and producing music so this was my first attempt at a full song. Kind of a test run. Had to up the volume on the vocals

“Momma Sed” Puscifer Cover

This song is kinda.. different I guess. It's about like.. waking up and continuing on for whatever unknown reason. Refers to this "light" that keeps me pushing through, and quite honestly I don't even know what that light is specifically. Other than when I look around and see things that I strive to have or for my life to be. Like the daughter/ father reference is an outside third persons observation of my desire to have a super close family. The rest you can decipher your own interpretation. 

Lyrics:
Astral Waters

{verse1}
I never thought I’d make
 Too much of this 
Eloquent waves  
Kept rushing in and I’m 
Fading and down on my luck 
Catacombs of memories  
sifting through
   
{chorus1}
And I see a youth filled daughter 
Clinging to a hopeful father 
These astral waters
  
{verse2}
This incandescent light of mine 
Seeks clarity  
Coaxing through to better days
(And) Clearer sky’s  
There’s a vortex in the clouds 
that breathes Each colors hue 
Circling above the trees 
I feel a push and fall from you
 
{chorus2}
I see a youthful daughter  
Clinging to a hope filled father 
Through astral waters 
Astral waters
These comforting waters 
Unbreakable waters
  
Come closer little light of mine 
I hope to see the end with you 
From battered down and broken fool 
To testaments and grateful jewel it’s 
Evident we’ve gone through the worst 
Breathe in time and build up your worth

"Astral Waters"

Heartbeat 2.0

Verse
She makes me crazy when
she’s wearing those heels
It’s like she knows exactly
How I feel
She got me sweatin waiting shakin
In the hot seat
List full fast and vicious is the way
She makes my heart beat

Chorus
You know I can’t explain
How to switch from this lane
I gotta break these chains
She just drives me insane
Is it all in my brain
She makes me feel so insane
What is this? Just pain
She makes my heart beat
She makes my heart beat

Verse
2..3..4..
She’s comin at me
Like A coveting smoke
To reach inside
Encompassing my grove
She goes:
“I’m gonna tear you
Limb from limb ha ha”
She’s making me beg
Her for more and control
My sin
It makes me hazy when
She’s lickin those lips
It’s catastrophic when
She moves with those hips
I’m just a’sweatin waitin shakin
In the hot seat
Lustful fast and vicious
Is the way she’s makin my heart beat

Chorus
You know I can’t explain
How to switch from this lane
I gotta break these chains
It just drives me insane
Is it all in my brain
You makes me feel so insane
What is this? Just pain
She makes my heart beat
While I’m the bastard son
She gonna have her fun
Just use me and run
Knock me to my knees
Slicing straight through my throat
Give me bits of hope
The Sucubus code
That made my heart beat
She makes my heart beat

Break
She makes me crazy when
she’s wearing those heels
It’s like she knows exactly
How I feel
She got me sweatin waiting shakin
In the hot seat
List full fast and vicious is the way
She makes my heart beat

Chorus
You know I can’t explain
How to switch from this lane
I gotta break these chains
It just drives me insane
Is it all in my brain
You makes me feel so insane
What is this? Just pain
She makes my heart beat
While I’m the bastard son
She gonna have her fun
Just use me and run
Knock me to my knees
Slicing straight through my throat
Give me bits of hope
The Sucubus code
That made my heart beat
She makes my heart beat
She makes my heart! Beat!
She goes!
Yes!

"Heartbeat 2.0"

(Verse1)
This is my mentality 
What do you think 
you’re doing with it
The object of the game 
Is not to win but just to play 
So sit up and shut down 
Just listen
To your cold lies
Knocking on my will go swingin'
Just succumb; bite
All these words that 
Made me listen 

(Chorus1)
And I feel
And I feel the brunt of the hammer
Crashing down
Caving through to my head
And I feel 
And I feel the head of the hammer
Breaking through 
Aiming straight for my chest

‘Cause you’re right

(Verse 2)
This is my mortality
What the fuck you think
You’re doing with it?
Starting all my days 
With just a want to be ok
Refocus then fade out 
Please try and listen
The bold cries
From broken walls and
Shattered haven
Controlled by 
All those words that 
Made him listen 
 

(Chorus2)
And I feel
And I feel the brunt of the hammer
Crashing down
Caving through to my head
And I feel 
And I feel the head of the hammer
Breaking through 
Aiming straight for my chest

Cause you’re right
rightx3
Crashing down and 
caving through you’re right
rightx3

Outro) 
When will you have your fill of all the honey?
Detrimental arrogance contriving all you will
And you’re constricting Not in comfort but 
In ways I can’t describe and I feel 

And I feel the hammer down
Breaking out and shaping up
To give myself this life that I deserve
Because I know that you aren’t rightx3
Caving through and crashing through
(You’re) not right 
Right x3

"Hammerdown"

I redid this song because the first one was my first real crack at producing. Still not quite studio quality but I'm more pleased with it now.

Lyrics:

I would have stole 
and bent and broke 
(to keep you safe)
I would have tried
and done my best
(to keep you safe) x3
I would have stole
and bent and broke
I would have tried 
I done my best.

(I) Built my house on a dollar bill 
That shaped the mold
I did the time and 
done what I had to grow 
She came to me
and sang a song 
It roped me in 
And stole my heart but no
I dug my grave 
Unknowingly the dirt 
It rises up again 
Now your little game
Is shining like the stars
So add my name

Walk with me 
But take it slower
Step by step
That leads us nowhere

And yet I’ve seen this before
But I’m too damn blind to care
I let temptation 
take me anywhere 
I should’ve tried
To playback time
Remember “devastation 
breaks your mind”

Walk with me
But take it slower
Step by step 
It’s going nowhere
This is now
The end and reason 
Take my leave
And leave you heaving

This is now the end
So draw a breath
And let the pale 
Become one with you
Dive a leap of faith
I’ll take the plunge 
Sinking deeper from 
The ankle weights
(I) I will not fall
And lose it all
Because I made a 
Fucking new mistake
Breathe a breathe of life
And take what’s mine
You’re growing more with 
Every single day

I would have stole 
and bent and broke
I would have lied
and done my best
I would have stole
and bent and broke
I would have tried
to do my best

I would have stole
and bent and broke x

I would have tried
I did my best 

To keep you safe

"Add My Name"

This ones about my struggles with my skin disease and has a side plot of some other shit that happened but I won't go in to detail on that haha. So another angry one.

Lyrics: 

Step.. 2.. 3.. 4.. x7
stop
You go and 
Walk!
Down!

verse 1
Hell another day 
of scraping by
My blood is boiling
as I check my vitals
My broken body 
it's like twine
Stiff burn 
like a fire from inside, 
it's sovereign
Lesion let go

I, wanna go home
try, to maintain hold
it's coming back..

seventy.. three
seven-ty THREE

(Verse2)
Another week
I'm scraping by
it's getting harder
to still see the 

(Chorus1)
silver line
(I wanna go home..)
give back my life
My skin is on fire
take me home

Walk! 
Down
Stay!
Down!
Walk!
Down
STAY!

(verse 2)
It's coming back 
again tonight
This volatility 
consumes my whole my life
No medications
help the sting
I sweat and tremble
as I try to win this

(Chorus 2)
 fight
(Just let me go home)
Look to the sky
My skin is on fire now...
gonna take back my
LIFE!

You go and WALK!
Down!

"Lesion73"

Another heavy one for ya. This one is about a very particular type of toxic person. 

Lyrics :

Careless & Oblivious
(Intro)
Now when you come
To find
All the ones you left with 
Broken bones
Who tried
(that you) trampled over 
They sold your memory
To break it; You
just want to reap
Without a consequence 
Of action but-
You’ll find out anyway!


(Verse1)
Breathe in
Reach out to
Break bounds of
Hearts windows
Pull closer
Him to you
Then tell them
Your “truth” 

(Prechorus)
Might want to watch where you go
Cause the evidence reads loud and true
(Oh) All the little minds 
All the loose screws
Cursed little smirk.. 
You want the company 
Of all the little mice
Poor little man
Wheel of your ploy
Go take your prisoner now

(Prechorus cont.)
I wanna know what you crawl home to
I wanna know what brings you comfort
With the trail of shattered enemies

(Chorus1)
You come
To find
All the ones you left with 
Broken bones
Who tried
(That you) trampled over 
They sold your memory
To shake it 
you just want to reap
Without a consequence 
Of action but-
You’ll find out anyway.

(Verse2)
Alright now go hide
Behind your lies
Don’t justify
You ain’t adjudicator.
Masqueraded alibis
don’t prove you’re right
Or cleanse your life
So don’t deny. 

(Secondary Verse)
And all they wanted 
was to give you 
all their precious time
But you seduce them to
Deduce to validate your crimes 
Consider all the post-traumatic 
Concentrated holes but
Your arrogance outweighs
A sympathetic soul.
You might want to keep on 
Watching where you go
Because it will come back
You’ll find out anyway

I wanna know 
where you call home
I wanna know
What makes you smile
When you have torn
So many hearts away

(Bridge thing)
I don’t want to break it to you nice
Careless and oblivious 
(DadadadaOH)

(End chorus)
You’ll find 
All the ones you left 
With broken bones
We're fine 
example of a
Atrocious memory
That’s faded you
Might want to think
About the consequence 
Of actions. Well,
you’ll find out anyway
You stole their time 
All the ones you played 
And then let go
Defied 
A sample of a
a quintessential 
Rearrangement you
Don’t get to speak to me 
About a holy conscience,
trust,
You’ll find out anyway.
You'll find out anyway

Careless and oblivious

Careless and Oblivious

Zombie - Cover (Original by The Cranberries)

I am a guitarist, vocalist, and mild drummer who lives in the rainy WA state. I'm in a band that focuses on hard rock / metal style of music, and I try to capture specific emotions for tell a specific story (or both) for each of my songs. I write a lot about mental health via metaphors, but also like to write songs that are more 'fun' and catchy. I currently do all of the instrument parts for my bands demos (as seen here) as I am the only one with a midi and the digital software. 

Hope you enjoy.

Donkleberg

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