EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES!
LINK!
VERSUS!
DOVAHKIIN!
BEGIN!

Dovahkiin
There is only one they fear, and it's not the Hero of Time
Just stop right there, green-clad scum, you must pay for your crimes
So "Hey Listen" you little fairy punk, put away your tiny Master Sword
The Elder Scrolls told of the return of the one who will leave you floored
Like Aludin, I'll blast your battalion, be slaying your stallion, take your medallions
I really don't need a companion because I'm known all around as being so valiant
I'll kill you with my bare hands, you and your little horse
You better be feeling nervous when I approach with my weapon drawn
Blast your ass back to the Lost Woods with my mighty FUS RO DAH!

Link
You think just screaming words is enough to take me down?
Why don't you suck my Spiritual Stone instead of stealing from those towns?
Take this red potion, Dovah, while I Z-Target your chest
And slash you vertically to death for resisting arrest
I won't need Din's Fire to burn you like Arniel's Convection
You're looking lost there, Dragonborn; just check the Dungeon Map section
I don't want to believe that you even exist, you're so bad
So take your little bent-horn helmet and shove it up your ass!

Dovahkiin
Hah! You think MY fashion sense is something to laugh about?
You're wearing an elf hat and a skirt; what gives YOU the right to stand proud?
All you eat and drink is milk and Magic Beans; can't even kill a chicken
I've got horker, cabbage, venison, weightless carrots, that's good eatin'!
You may have slayed Ganondorf, but now you're facing Dragonborn
I'll be the next to kidnap Zelda, show her my Biggoron's Sword
My magic's brilliantly better, so watch me blast and shout it loud
And sit and watch this Song of Storms bring the mighty thunder clouds!

Link
It's dangerous to go against me alone, you criminal scum
Your victory is like the fourth Triforce piece ñ there isn't one
I know you have bugs left and right in your trashy little game
But that doesn't mean you gotta scream, giving those dragons headaches!
I've got Ice Arrows as my Chillrend and the Sun's Song as my Dawnbreaker
Your game's only known for memes; of heroes, I'm the top taker
This isn't Skyrim, little scrub; you're in Hyrule, this is my land
So watch your step out in the fields, or you'll get Gannon-Banned!

WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!

Comments

Lumious

ExtraTokio

lil envelope

Supernal

Geki Aye

Gordon Kornbau

Eliza Moore

hawkscl20

Nuclear_robot

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