I think Ahhh! Real Monsters won this battle

horror

Frieza:
Evil and regal, the rightful heir to my father’s throne
And they pit me against an “equal” failed experiment of a clone?
What a joke! (hah!) I block your path like Snorlax, you won’t go far 
My advice is that you abort, like the fetus that you are (hohohoho!)
So forgettable: Mew-who — this crude fool’s bouta get screwed
The death scene? My Death Beams shooting through you like voodoo
You do read minds right? So why’d you choose this fight?
You’ll be the next to get burned by Supernova-hot rhymes

Mewtwo:
Go use the shitter, sci-fi Hitler, you sound Super constipated
If this were an ego contest, you’d be the winner, undebated
But since it ain’t, you’ve sealed your fate: leave you sobbing like Pikachu
I’m at the Top when it comes to ‘mons, force you to replay peekaboo.

Space Karen better go take a seat next to Ash
For you must be stoned to think you’ll win this clash
Spitting Colder than your dad on the track
We all know that for Cheelai you down bad
When I’m on the attack, this ant should keep back
End you quick with a Focus Blast
You’d think I’m Burter, I’m rhyming fast
Steel-ing this win; like your type is Grass

I suggest growing your horns back, ‘cuz up there right now it’s looking bare
Bet that’s why you really offed Krillin, was blinded with jealousy, no Solar Flare
Really, this space ‘count’ can't even tell the time? How sad.
I’d say you’re screaming like a girl, but I guess one’s voiced you in the past

Frieza:
I expected dazzling fireworks, that was an awful display
And my actress remains praised, yours is hated to this day
Wish to insult my appearance? Here’s something to consider:
Change into your Y form, and take a good look in the mirror!

For somebody who’s used a spoon as a weapon
You can’t scoop a win into your possession
I am divine, you are sublime
Banned from being competitive right? Then get the hell out of my sight!

Now I’ll be wrapping this up like my home in Hell
Flipping off this skinny two toed Pokémon, Go fuck yourself!!!

Mewtwo:
Got saved from death and rebuilt as a cyborg, but it didn’t go well
Trunks went and split you in half just like the opinions of Dragon Ball fans after Cell
I’ve been used as a pawn before to fulfill desires of powerful men 
But that’s nothing compared to when you were used as a toy by Broly for hours on end
Your character’s hard to defend, enslaving races without a care
So how about I whip you until you’re on your knees begging to be spared again?
Couldn’t spew heat like a Charizard, you proved to be no hassle
It would seem your Golden Form has taken Silver in this battle

@fightmarker as Frieza
King Mewtwo as Mewtwo (yes)
Beat by Kustom
Written by King Mewtwo
Additional Writing Help by @sw4nked, @snakebite126, @metamachinee and Robo Rebellion Studios
Mixed by Fightmarker
Cover Art by @micahmp4

Frieza vs Mewtwo. Anything vs Dragon Ball

Dababy vs. Optimus Prime - Royal Rap Battle!


Danii As Dababy 


Swizkii As Optimus Prime 


Art by Forgottensons & Supergamerbro 


Mixed by Light_IWNL


Special thanks to Snakebite126


Chiselled by Raisu Battle


Written by King Ducky


Beat prod. Anywaywell 


Dababy:

Less goooo, (yuh) you wanna face me? Dababy? (huh?)

Bitches crazy for me, the only hoes you know are Mercedes (haha)

Saturday morning is a sadder day morning for you fans cuz your show has died 

Yuh yuh, ain’t it funny how optimistic Optimus is past his prime? (Oh!)


So I say you stop it and listen (uhuh) every single shot you be missing (For real)

But if this trash bin’s my opposition I’ll pull out the nine, traumatise all the children (yeah!)

You used to get women but Megatron pulled up and put your bitch down (Ouch)

Ariel’s no longer under the sea, that hoe is six feet under the ground! 


Optimus Prime:

Seems you didn't do your research Kirk, you’ve always been a cop out

See, she and I were rebuilt jerk, don’t try to school me drop out

Your lines are only slapping when your palm lines collide with a woman's face

So do the same as you did after that day: Don’t say shit and walk off the stage


Can’t even create an apology properly so what makes you think you can mess with me?

A balding mumbo jumbo mumble rapper can't even get close to my legacy!

You’re just another fad among many and your bars clearly show that

But I’ll aim for that big target atop your large head, haha no cap


Dababy:

When my fans pull up they pull up vids of them doin’ pull-ups (yuh?)

When your fans pull up all they do is pull up their Pull-Ups, I PULL UP


Step to my group you’ll be leavin’ in two, you’ll look the same as your palette: Red, black and blue

Everyone prefers Bumblee over you bitch ass, plus your movies def belong down the chute (Wooh!)

Bay directed that shit, explains why it blew like your shoulder when I pop out the glock and then shoot

Like you were Brawn, now there goes your brawn. You’ll be taking bronze, silver goes to my crew (yeah)


When these bullets reach your cranium (yuh?) you’ll be turning grey again (true!)

And this time no one will be savin’ him (nope!) it loses stakes, no more playin’ pretend 

You basic bitch, when facing this I'll forge this trash bin ass into my hand warmer

With your ships, not Seaspray (nah), I'm not surprised they call ya Trans-formers! (Ayyy haha)


Optimus Prime:

When Optimus Prime is rocking the mic he’s already erased the thought of mercy

I'm not surprised you’d be droppin’ a rhyme like that considering your controversies 

Committing robberies when you got lots of green? Heh, that's quite depressing, yet 

I wouldn't put trust in your beliefs since you think Kanye should be president! (Nah)


I'm not usually as mean but when faced teeny fiends i’ll easily split them at the seams

Your fame wouldn't be the same as it is today if not for the memes

Ironic, a mugging got you a mug shot, for a third time you’ve been caught now

Luckily for you I'm done going all out… Autobots, roll out


Dababy vs. Optimus Prime - Royal Rap Battle!

lyrics:

Ayo
This a song about
My, my stepdad
Let's see if this ever happened to you
I, I hate
My, my stepdad
One thing that sticks in my craw
When I was six and I saw my stepfather hittin' my mom
Socked her right in her eyeball
I'm startin' to think I'm psychotic
With all the pictures that I draw of
Shit that I've already witnessed, this probably twisted my thoughts
All I can hear is drama with mom and him
I can always hear 'em arguin' down the hallways
The walls are thin so the noise is startin' to feel like the norm
My dog pissed on the carpet, he stomped it so hard
Doctors had to put it down
He killed my chihuahua, this motherfucker
I, I, hate
My, my stepdad (stepdad)
So tonight I'm sayin'
"Bye-bye stepdad" (stepdad)
Outside, I look like I'm calm
Inside, I'm a tickin' time bomb
'Cause of this motherfucker, who sticks his dick in my mom (my mom)
Last night, he said I left the kitchen light on
But he walked in there this morning and purposely flipped it, I saw him
Hickory switch to my bottom, I counted sixty-nine times
He swatted me with it, I'd cry
He just started hittin' me harder
God, I just wish I could jaw him
If I could get my weight up
But I'm just a second grader
This prick is bigger than I am
But I've been readin' at school about this shit called liquid cyanide
I'm fantasizin' at night when he's sleepin' at just the right time
Sneak up with a lethal injection and put him down like they did to my dog
I'm talkin' euthanasia (euthanasia), like kids in Taiwan
This fuckin' shit's like Saigon (Saigon)
Neighbors called police on him
So many battery charges, this dude's like lithium ion
Then mom and him let bygones (bygones), just be bygones
So on eggshells, I walk and just try not to piss this guy off
But this why I
I, I, hate
My, my stepdad (stepdad)
So tonight I'm sayin'
"Bye-bye stepdad" (stepdad)
So this year, I'm goin' to the fifth and I'm tall
I'm five foot six on my block, I'm the toughest kid but I got
Way bigger fish to fry, which is why I'm tryna get this bitch to fly off
The handle and wait for the fist to fly to put this guy in a pine box
He's always lookin' for chaos but tonight I've cooked up a plan
So this Christmas, I got some color books and some crayons
I'm layin' on the floor, in the living room with some friends colorin'
He walks by, kicks my arm and goes "Whoops" and just laughs
I yelled for mom (mom) and as she's rushin' to my defense
I stood up and said, "Fuck you punk" and I took off and ran
To my bedroom, as I fled
Knowin' shit would hit the fan
Slammed the door and hid behind it with an aluminum bat
He kicked it in
I swung it hard as I could at his head
His noodle went splat, he fell right at the foot of my bed
I'm a little bit scared but my anger's overtooken the fear
I threw down the bat and just started whoopin' his ass
Beat him with my bare hands, the big bad wolf ain't so bad
"Ding-dong, " the pussy is dead, the bully finally gets his
Stomped him until he pissed enough to fill a two liter with
Then buried him next to my dog
And if I go to juvie for this, I'ma tell 'em
I, I, hate
My, my stepdad (stepdad)
So tonight I'm sayin'
"Bye-bye stepdad" (stepdad)
'Cause I, I, hate
My, my stepdad (stepdad)
So tonight I'm sayin'
"Bye-bye stepdad" (stepdad)

prod. by kendrick lamar
coverart by serena
special thanks to shadow money wizard gang

Peashooter! (feat. Freshy Kanal)

original battle: https://soundcloud.com/user-953382854/cheshire-cat-vs-schrodingers

this battle singlehandedly convinced me that rosenthal is a goat and made me wanna collaborate with them, so this is a way for me to return the favor 

mix and cover art by me
beat by libra
everything else by rosenthalfishes

Cheshire Cat (0:14):

I am the Cheshire Cat, welcome to my Wonderland,
You want to battle rap? You must be hatter mad,
'Cause that plan is total cap no matter how you catch these hands.
Chess to your boxing match, tell me what comes after that?

Ah right. Your entire life fades. I think your mind ain’t the right place
Debating ‘bout a quantum space. Complacently my playground is the mental state!
Shove your stupid theories back in your box, you only prove your worth with words and talk!
Here’s an observation I made when I looked at you, your win is totally gone!

Schrodinger's Cat (0:40)

Cheshire, you best not mess with an experimental tester
Whether or not you enter my box, you will find you are lesser
Hypothesis of my pseudo-science, you shouldn’t be smiling when you eye my findings
Terrorising a tiny child like your writer then hiding in the lines like you’re pedo-filing, uh!

While my question's quite complex, you’ve literally lost your head. In my thoughts, I’ll
Opt to forget this bothersome pet but I know it’s not possible yet, it’s a toss up
Whether or not the probable end of following disses bodying disembodied
Heads get a fraudulent death, this has brought me ahead! Now, your defence?

Cheshire Cat (1:07)

What? What?
It seems like the real mystery’s whatever the fuck you discuss, ‘cause it must be
Like one big crusty bunch of duds who get stumped by an Amazon package.
Your argument’s like a rabbit, they follow it and your world collapses.

Schrodinger’s Cat (1:21)

You’re not smart enough to understand, you only ponder when it’s part of your Wonderland,
I couldn’t tell if you were intelligent when I looked at ya, y’know, like you’re Looking Glass?
‘Cause when you’re fighting the feline who’s neither alive or reaped, at the sight of me
You’ll fold when I deck ya with speed like the Queen of Hearts, that’s Binocular Rivalry.

Cheshire Cat (1:35)

My words chain like a catenary, cat’s are nary prone to form brawls with adversaries,
But for you? (Yes, you) The situation’s scary. (Yeah!) This foe spits rather hairy! (Uh!)
On the contrary, when you’re comparing us? I choose when I’m not lingering,
You’re a little Sphynx giving a silly riddle. (Who?) Schro’s more Schro-bingus!

Either way, you’ll still be Flopping! They put your ass up for adoption!
Frankly, your mechanic’s more quan-dumb, went from paradox to oxy-moron!
When you start talking, it’ll cause the alarm to detect my diss so toxic,
You’re gonna fail and pass away ‘cause like your later portrayals, you did na-zi your loss, bitch!

Schrodinger’s Cat (2:01)

It’s true that I’m locked in, caught in a awful coffin,
But when I drop bombs in my box, the volume’s up. Call that shit sub-atomic.
‘Cause the chance you beating me ain’t fifty-fifty, the time’s dry.
When it comes down to people I talk to, this kid’s more Liddel Einstein!

I’m the classiest cat in this rap, you’re a sad has-been with a knack for distracting
Madness, you only ever spit Radioactive like my flask does when I Imagine Draggin’
Your flat ass back to the pasture - your past home - pass by your passport, now in the Lowlands,
I’ve seen Manyworlds, but the skill between us is plain to observe - like a Cheshire Gap.

[RAYYAN MIX] Cheshire Cat vs. Shrodinger's Cat  - Rap Battles of Whatever

Having spent more days inside the pen than out, these two toxic foes are not to be trifled with, which one will overpower the other?

Written by R the Writer
B-Lo as Bane
MetalFireVA as Magellan
Thumbnail by Soul
Audio Mixed by B-Lo
Beat Prod. by 2Deep

Bane:
Do you know who I am? I am not pirate or marine
Not a monkey, croc, or shark, nor a gleeful dancing queen
Stand above sadistic guards and cowardly vice wardens
But I embody each in one way, you fell before them
Born and raised imprisoned, I know how to handle bars
You had one job, lost it and gained some facial scars
Tear Impel Down apart, then I pull myself together
Breaking you worse than the bat with every single limb dismembered

Magellan:
Hold it Hannyabal, I'll be the one to show him hell
Don't need to be the chief to throw this menace in a cell
Think I fell before a prisoner? I'll tell you now, you're dead wrong
Even those who left weren't dumb enough to take me head on
When my hydra coats the wax, then you'll truly learn to dread me
As I imitate your dad, and leave you with another dead beat
Your IQ points are dropping, your actions lack momentum
So put down your feeding tube and get a taste of real venom

Bane:
I'm an icon of pop culture, you're a blip in your own lore
As your failure was followed by an all out pirate war
You most trusted post-demotion feels like quite the fake out
Since we all know you'll soon suffer a second breakout
You'll need to make a deeper floor, before your gates become agape
Because I'm worse than any foe that you've chose to let escape
Far as brains go you're ranked below your mob of blue apes 
But if you wish to compare strength then I'll squish you like a grape

Magellan:
The devil's out to get you, he's moving pretty fast
Your biggest feats are retconned, your reputation: trash
And you want an opportunity to prove you're more than talk?
Well I've used my poison powers to leave every exit blocked
You're nothing but a patsy, your allies need not bother
Lost favor with the demon's head, and your shot at his daughter's
Though I suppose it's apt, there's no taste in what you spew
Truth is, I've taken shits that have caused more pain than you

Bane Vs Magellan - Rap Battle

Beat by me
Both voices by me
Mix by Kenos https://www.youtube.com/@KENOSISHOT
TN by gman2006. on Discord


Story time! A few weeks ago I thought, "Hey, you know what would be cool? Making an entire rap battle, beat and all, in less than two hours!"

I wrote the beat in half an hour, the lyrics in an hour, recorded it in the last half hour... got it all sent to Kenos, got the mix back same day, asked for Gman's thumbnail expertise, got that wicked fast...

And then proceeded to forget to upload it for weeks.

Ohwellyouknowwhattheysaybetterlatethannever.wav

This may or may not be redone with higher quality and better lyrics for a future release, but I wanted to show what I did now because I'm super proud of it!

Side note: Zapdos is mainly based on his iterations in the spinoffs, referencing Rescue Team and Guardian Signs in particular.


LYRICS:
ZAPDOS
Is the Power Plant jacker back from hiatus?
Primeape is less scary past prime, ain’t it?
I’m at the top of Mt Thunder while your kind’s wasted
On a vigilante fresh out of the ice! Face it
You guard a lethal weapon cause your maker bot got personal
Mega showed up and made your Montage Terminal
You know the drill, try to Mirror my Moves
But a thunder god could surely put the fear inside you

MANDRILL
I was at this centuries before you could fly
Scrap the 20, I’ll put two X’s over your eyes
Try to armor through a Squirtle shell but still they let the kill show
Now I’ll do it right back- Disarmored Armadillo
Shifty poultry shoulda stayed in Gen 1
Cause when Shiftry showed you went and let his friends run
With your OU niche depleted, it seems fitting
That a team of children’s your last means of lifting

ZAPDOS
Bitch, I know you didn’t keep that up
You’re a pushover in everyone’s elite TAS runs
And now every single remix sees a beast gassed up
But your battle isn’t even worth a rematch, bud
I’m fly like Layuda, you’re grounded like Renbow
Without any range, fire straight if you can though
Like Eagle so high you got beat from the sky
Now I’ll leave you behind, as fast as Nintendo
MANDRILL
Slow as your plotline, Sigma to Slugma
I’ll bring the dark world your audience runs from
Claim moral high ground, but this tuta-minus
Tries channeling lightning on kids when they fight him
I was built as a sentry protecting this entrance
Electric defenses your pecks never get in
Took too many hits, and now look what’s happened
No Galar, I left this attack chicken blackened

Zapdos Vs Spark Mandrill- THE RAP RING! 2 Hour Challenge

VOTE HERE: https://forms.gle/gjgQvZi3o9fFXj119

FRB Brawl: Rematch's third battle of Round 1 pits the creator of Super Star Rap Battles, Jofinity, against the creator of Nugget Rap Battles, Nugget.

They say third time's the charm, but this is neither Jofinity's nor Nugget's third bout. Will Jofinity's many FRBs help him be crowned the super star, or will Nugget's begginer status (and swag) help him have this win in the McDonald's bag? Be sure to vote so that one may advance and one may wallow in shame.

Mixed by Danii
Thumbnail by YLF Ethan
Produced by 2Deep

Lyrics:

Jofinity:

I’m ‘bout to eat and you won’t be a *Happy* Meal, chief
Fuck McDonalds, I’m bringing some real beef
Packin’ fuckin heat, and I’ll do more than popping corn
Cuz I’m leavin’ no crumbs for you to eat off of the floor

You live under a rock if you think your kiddy shit is ballin’
You musta crawled up from a hole straight outta Kindergarten
I’ll show the mods a dogpile when I beat this bitch
You Nugget Dog: stupid ugly piece of shit

All your fans are dead. And it’s not that your battles hit
You pump out the schlock, but they’re practicin’ abstinence
I’ve never seen a kid be so proud of all his junk
He places better on the talking charts than Battle of the Month

Think you’ll beat me? You must be smoking that “grass, man”!
Nugget’s wanted for ten counts of sexual harassment.
But don’t take it from me, let’s hear it from your loving fans
Creepy Pedophile DK: Yeah, I love Nugget, man!

Nugget:

So Jo, do you think you’re a good foe? I say no!
Cuz you’re not funny you’re more so the joke!
And getting well known in the community was a slow start
Yet I only took half your time to stick or star 

Went through your catalog and it showed you ain’t a hassle 
Since the disses you get from uploading hit harder than what’s in your battles
Just like when he drops on events, nobody cares for him
You lost to two Brit’s and now two Americans 

Jo, sorry bro, but shouldn’t battle the best
Or you’ll be cut off like battles from your direct 
But I digress, I mean it was an honest mistake
Just like those “creative” decisions you make

The whole time finding a beat with you I wanted to die 
It was so bad the next day your computer opted to end its life!
And no matter how much you improve it’s never enough 
So here’s a tip, bud. Give up! :D

Jofinity:

Say I should give up, but you quit your job cuz it’s a bit hard
Went from theater ticket-taker, to taking them in cars
I know you can’t relate, but right now, I am seein’ red
You thought that shit was good? Wait, are you colorblind or deaf?

You would’ve had some material that isn’t lame
If I had hit send that one time I mistakenly misspelled your name
We all pretend to like you, you’re FRB’s villain
And he thinks he’s got a shot at top 10? …Let’s kill him

Nugget:

You may be the wheat, but you won’t eat this beat 
Leave you like your 5 fans; starving 
 5 is a little too nice, maybe none is correct?
Because i've only heard silence in your public 

Just like your request for roles, hmm, though
I do plan on getting you as Rivers Cuomo
But you need to go if you think you’re the joker
Nugget just stole the show, so sorry, itsJover

Jofinity:

Anyone else think Nugget is a stupid little fucking bitch?

Nugget:

Anyone else think Jo ruined Bolt vs Puppington?
And the only thing he’s good at is making people mad

Jofinity:

(Grrrrr) That’s it. Me. You. Krusty Krab!

Jofinity:

…I went from rags, to riches!
Admit it, evildoer, you are… autistic!
You’re a racist, just face it, notoriously misogynistic,
I’d report ya, but your ass is too white to be “black”listed!

Nugget:

Fuck you Jofiny! You should have known I’m goated
While you? Uhh more whack coded 
You think you’re a superstar? I got super bars
And my next verse is going to go super hard!

Jofinity vs ItsNugget. FRB Brawl: Rematch Round 1

Local58 VS The Nøkken - Rap Battle!

Local 58:
Good Evening, viewer’s Nøkken’s our talk off the day Despite being a “great” myth his gifts are sadly not that great
He gets little reception wasting time in all that lake
Now don’t touch that dial as: We Begin Our Broadcast Day

Tune into your raps? I’d rather skip to an Ad Break 
It’s sad, mate, Seeing your talents trashed cuz’ it’s bad waste
I’m intact to a few glitches; In fact, I’ve chosen to overt 
Your best appearance, rebranding by demanding it be Frozen over

Is your verse forbidden music? Because it’s surely killing me
Melted your tormentors ears, yet it couldn’t kill a beat
And now this sulking loner is left soaking by the shore to swim
After cutting off a village and the only girl that supported him

Your spree was a Contingency that they couldn’t see  
That girl surely would’ve helped now she couldn’t, but wouldn’t she? 
My verse has concluded but before our broadcast is finished, you can still win this if you: Assume the Victory Position

The Nokken:
You force yourself into people’s minds and try to push them to their doom?
What makes you think that we’re still scared of Molester Moon?
This violinist turns violent too wrap up your verse
You wish there was an ad break so you could drown us in your merch

Your station has little foundation with the verses you’re building
Don’t you know that Analog Horror is just Shows for Children?
Made new horror clique’s thinking that your shits hotter
But you’ve nearly dipped your toes in the water

You’re fake news, makes sense that your claims are baseless
Face it; Your rhythm’s like your victims: Fucking Faceless!
You hide away in the sky but I’m the one looking down on you
“Safety in Numbers” is a blunder you live in solitude

Eclipse is what you outta do, then you’d get some light shined
Daytime is when I thrive, but for you it’s night, night
Hope I didn’t soak you, just tryna roast you
Cuz’ with only a splash, you broadcast goes bye, bye

“51st State” Local58: 
You’re on the fastest available route if you’re trying to bathe in hell
Kid, you’re striving to annoy me? I’ll drive you insane as well
Were your storyteller’s on the White Horse when they turned you to a white horse?
You couldn’t even get your almost wife on that not-so “high horse”

Here’s your Weather Alert: I’m raining hell upon your waters!
Your chances of survival, are as high as chances of having a daughter
Nøk is not getting up and now his corpse is belly up
Goodnight, that’s our time but your time is already up

The Nökken: 
If attention is your weapon, then mister you might abort
You to claim to be immortal, while Kister’s your only Life Support
I’d take you to the depths but you’re no stranger to stooping low
These analog trends have already sunken so welcome to your new home

Fans think you’re aliens? Explains the unsubtly 
You’re just a skippable phase popping up abruptly
Blood Moon’s now a Bloody Moon it was Blue from the start
Aimed for that airtime but all you did was shoot for the stars

ClarenceTheDuck as Local58
durdoesstuff as Local58 and The Nøkken 
Matt Raichous as Public Service Announcer
FulmonThe as the 51st State
Mixed by ClarenceTheDuck, durdoesstuff, and WeThink
Art by Tompuffs
Produced by Korekitten
Arranged by CornCob
Thumbnail by Ryufan76

Local58 VS The Nøkken (ft. ClarenceTheDuck, durdoesstuff, & FulmonThe) - Rap Battle!

Swoldow as Freddy
GRASMAN as Roosevelt
Mixed by jort
beat by allrounda

Announcer:
Rap Battles!
Theodore Roosevelt 
Vs.
Freddy Fazbear!
Begin!


Theodore Roosevelt:
Let’s get this settled: I’m a rebel with the medals that’ll drop you,
Death couldn’t fight me if you stuffed me in a costume!
Maybe when I’m resting, on a job I don’t sleep.
Ain’t talkin SB when I bury you six feet deep.
Now let’s compare this metal freak to the G.O.A.T,
You take a look at your own face and stopped your spree
It’s not the critic who counts but god damn that pizza!
That’s what's dropping bodies at Freddy’s, not William! 

Freddy Fazbear:
Moose against bear?, you lost in this pair 
Maybe grow a few inches to make this fight fair 
see nothing but a stare, you best get prepared
you don’t have a speech that’ll stop this jump scare!
I’d stuff you into a suit, but none would fit
Love skinny dipping but you don’t got drip 
How’d you win a peace prize with your racism 

Hand unit:
Fazbear Entertainment ain’t responsible for that sick diss

Theodore Roosevelt:
I fought and won a war, I’m not afraid 
surprised you didn’t scrap your verse and write it again
Got broken and withered, now no kid wants to play with you
But I got no problem playing hunter with bears like you 
I’m all for saving land, but don’t listen to Smokey bear, okay?
Either way it’s bad advice, look at the fire in your games 
All that heat, yet you still fail to spit me up some flames 
I took your mother and gave her a “Happiest Day”!

Freddy Fazbear:
Why don’t you conserve fredeez nuts, cowboy 
You’re only ever chiseled plastered on Rushmore 
Spitting ice from my music box, more frozen than my pizza is 
You look like a mix of Grasman, and a Pringles packet!
I hear the secrets that you keep (hor hor hor)
Can’t kill you awake? I’ll do it in your sleep
Poor excuse of a hunter, you’re maybe a Girl Scout 
Cuz it’s teddy season when the lights go out…

Freddy Fazbear vs. Theodore Roosevelt | NIGHT ONE

Dr Robotnik vs King Harkinian - Rap Assault Bonus!

Dr Robotnik: Stofferex
King Harkinian: Cri
Sonic (quick cameo): Also Cri

Written by: CreeperPasta 
Art by: CreeperPasta
Thumbnail by: CreeperPasta
Produced by: Anywaywell & TristanOnTheTrack
Mixed by: CreeperPasta


Dr Robotnik:

If that stubborn little rapper won't write me a rap battle, I'll write my own rap battle!
(Beat starts as he laughs)

I've come to make an announcement: Dr Ivo Robotnik
Will take over Hyrule because all of you are moronic
All your games, old man? I hate them way more Sonic
No wonder those idiotic shitposts is where you became so iconic
You octorock brain baboon, lame cartoon with gameplay so rusty
Face the faces of evil with your faces so disgusting 
I'm a Mean Diss Machine, I.M. Meen has better looks
And it looks like you need a better plan than throwing me a book
While you wonder what's for dinner, I'll be scheming like a sinner
The demise of this beginner. I'm the undisputed winner
You youtube nincompoop, I'll leave your kingdom in commotion
As you scrub the floors of the town. Consider this your promotion.

King Harkinian: 
Enough! Quit wasting my time with your toys, Dr Willy
It is written that rodents leave you beaten, crying and whining 
If that's the case, I won't need to bring with me the triforce
I have the courage to bring the rhymes true warriors strive for
Mean Bean Machine? You're just a raging obscene 
Self centered obese. Get your ass off my screen.
Your cartoon. That I've seen, and it's such a disgrace 
Like your rhymes, all those inventions end up blowing in your face.
Snooping as many Looney Tunes as possible, I see
You're no Coyote. You're a lesser Yosemite Sam to put it nicely 
If Ganon couldn't dethrone me, what makes you think you would?
We both know you peaked at high-school.

Sonic: And that's no good!

Rap Off BONUS! Dr Robotnik vs King Harkinian (AOSTH vs Zelda CDI) 100 Hours Challenge!

@jmbraps as Slender Man, Jason Voorhees, Squidward's Suicide, BRVR and Hannibal Lecter
@rlyoshi as Jeff the Killer
@lazysundaypaper as Eyeless Jack and Pennywise
@blingface as Freddy Krueger
@mat4yo as Michael Myers and Dead Bart
@rush as sonic.exe
@erboi as Tails Doll and Chucky
@adolf-kyenza as BEN Drowned
@riventheexile as Cupcakes
@gamingallstarrapbattles as Happy Appy
@hyperjacob96 as Herobrine
@epicrapbattlesofcartoons as MARIO
@ciaran-mcginn as Leatherface
@stofferex as Ghostface
@thesuperplushybros as Pinhead
@Froggy7771 as Jigsaw
@kevin_krust as Norman Bates
@mancha-4 as Cujo
@s0n1c-fr3nzy as Sweeny Todd


Creepypastas vs Slashers

So I did an audio battle for one of my friends, ProbablyNoah http://epicrapbattlesofhistory.wikia.com/wiki/User:ProbablyNoah

In this battle we have two striped child murdering clowns, the Creepypasta Laughing Jack and the horror movie icon Captain Spaulding!

Lyrics: 

Captain Spaulding: 
PLAY TIME, BITCH! Alright Jackass, it’s time to go inside!

Time for you to die, ‘cause my flow’s a lyrical MURDER RIDE!

I’ll stomp this ass, leave him flat, fuckin’ slice this brat in half!

Your names about right, Jack, cause your story makes me laugh!

You miserable motherfucker, stop Jacking off and feel the real pain!

I’ll Rob this victory from you, leave you feeling Tiny like your name was James!

Look at me, I’m gorgeous! You’re a distorted orphan morph, bitch!

When I’m done, we’ll change the name of my film to “One thousand and ONE corpses!”


Laughing Jack:
(Hahaha…) Jacky’s about to leave this bearded slob smitten,

You sell expired fried poultry, but it looks like you’re the old burned chicken,

Make a whole carnival frown when I take this greasy disappointment down!

Because in an unexpected plot-twist, YOU’RE the reason kids hate clowns!

I’d rather face Eyeless Jack then this buffoon, who’s the weak foe?

You’re just an egotistical dimwit who belongs in his own freakshow,

Cutter you open- Hang up this old hooker, leave his stomach full of sugar,

And don’t feel special- You’re not even the first dog I’ve butchered.


Captain Spaulding:
You make me I-sick! And I’m gonna leave this social defect wrecked!

With your emo face-paint, you’re looking like the Devil’s Reject!

Wanna act manly? You’re really a pansy, but that’s fine and dandy!

but you’re by FAR the last person I’d want giving ME candy!


Laughing Jack: 
I’ll slaughter this stalker after I blow him out of the water,

My rhymes are hotter then the fires that grilled your daughter,

Burn down your shack, all you’ll hear is my laugh,

And then they’ll mark your death ruled as “suicide by Laughing Jack”


Captain Spaulding: 
I oughta bash your balls in! Your pasta ain’t got shit on my movie!

Pfft! Think you’re spooky? There’s no way you could handle my duties!

You’re just kooky and moody, I’m the best around, but truly,

So I guess you could say beating you was TUTTI FUCKIN FRUITY!


Laughing Jack:
All around the Mulberry bush, Jacky chased the pedophile,

The pedo though twas all in fun, until he found the Jack to be hostile,

Jack followed him to his home, left him flattened before he knew what happened,

Now he’s missing in action- Pop! Goes the captain!



Laughing Jack Vs Captain Spaulding- ERatBoHorror

Justin Buckner as Ickis
Zack Maloney as Oblina
Frenzy as Krumm
Anthony Perry as Mike Wazowski
WoodenHornets as Sulley

Lyrics:
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF CARTOONS!
AHH! REAL MONSTERS!
VERSUS!
MONSTERS INC!
BEGIN!

Ickis:
The three epic monsters are gonna bring pain on these losers
Oblina:
I’m fancy, rich, and ravishing, but also a lyrical bruiser
Krumm:
It doesn’t take the viewfinder to show you two can’t scare
Ickis:
You two better go away, Jimmy and Googly Bear
Oblina:
I’m top of my class, but brains are something you don’t have
Krumm:
Who the hell takes a filthy human, and neglects to put it back?
Ickis:
You both are just failed excuses for money making blockbusters
All:
Our disses will make you be screaming “AHH! REAL MONSTERS!!!”
 
Mike Wazowski:
It’s Mike on the mic, about to make these monsters fall!
I can see your defeats with just my one eyeball
Sulley:
We’ll beat these guys so bad, they’ll start to Krumm-ble
When you face Sulley in a fight, better get ready to tremble
Mike Wazowski:
Ickis, you’re making me sick, Oblina is Beetlejuice’s dildo
We’ll take the screams out of you punks, just like we did with our prequel
Sulley:
We will step through the door and enter a room of your defeat 
You’ll be the jackpot for us, we get our power from your screams

Ickis:
You had a change of heart in the ends? Now that’s upsetting 
Oblina:
We’re be the ones who scare when you leave you bedwetting
Krumm:
Even Gromble would school you! Kick you out of our world
Ickis:
You two think you can win? You got scared by a little girl!
Oblina:
I’ll nit pic these Pixar pricks, even your shorts are shit
Krumm:
Scaring humans is your job, we do it for the hell of it
Ickis:
You two are jokes compared to us, we are legendary
All:
We are the true winners here, you guys aren’t even scary 

Mike Wazowski:
We’ll give you nightmares, we even made Randall run in fear
You can’t take us on, you only aired for four years
Sulley:
Oblina I can’t believe ya, how’s your squish on Krumm?
Ickis, even your brother slickis has disses that make you look dumb
Mike Wazowski:
We’ve got a whole corporation, while you’re still in monster school
You were inspired by the Beatles? Klasky must’ve been a fool!
Sulley:
Since you can’t scare us, you’ll dissappear, now you won’t taunt us
Both:
You’ll be down in Nick’s trash, while we’re the REAL monsters!

WHO WON?
WHO’S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP *girl screams* BATTLES OF CARTOONS!

Ahh Real Monsters vs Monsters Inc. Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons Special

@mancha-4 as Chica
Logan Loehrer as Bonnie
@jmbraps as Foxy
@erboi as Freddy
@joshua-tomlin-1 as SCP-087
@stofferex as SCP-049
@videogamerapbattles as SCP-107
@ciaran-mcginn as SCP-173

Rap Battle
The SCP Foundation vs Five Nights at Freddy’s
Begin!

Chica:
Let’s eat! These SCPs don’t have a clue what they’ve done
We’ll grind you up, take you down before you see the sun

Bonnie:
You’re all Euclid bitches trying to step to real horrors
Let’s see how safe you feel when you can’t close your doors

Foxy:
Ahoy mateys, do you hear my foot steps on the ground 
I’ll hook up these SCPs to show I’m the scariest around

Freddy:
Your power’s running out; play dead all you want
But you’ll know there’s no way out when I start playing my song

SCP-087:
The SCP’s are here, get ready to get your neck snapped
These robots will be breaking down, now to finish this crap

SCP-049:
I can’t believe we’re battling a fox, bear, chicken, and a bunny
You Chuck E’ Cheese ripoffs can never get past these SCP MC’s

106:
Slaughter you and your guard, there shall be no witness
Your filthy pizza place ain’t the only thing going out of business

SCP-173:  
Blink, I dare you, you scum are no where near elucid 
I’d give you respect, if your game wasn’t so stupid

(Freddy) We’ll be running down the corridor, giving many gamers fright
(Bonnie) We’re draining the power, you’ll never survive the night!
(Chica) Super Creepy Pastas? And you call our game stupid, ha!
(Foxy) (Arrrr) You won’t see us coming when you can’t see the security cameras 
(Bonnie) Don’t try to close the door on us (Freddy) or you’ll be jump scared
(Foxy) I read your pastas; they sucked! (Chica) You’re not going anywhere
(Bonnie) Static on the screen, (Freddy) watch out, (Foxy) ain’t you cute!
(All) You couldn’t stay alive for 1 night, now we’ll stuff you in a bear suit


(173) You guys still wanna fight us? Well this should be fun
(049) Better step back before these animals become DATA EXPUNGED!
(106) Wipe the blood off your face, you’re all just a disgrace!
(087) This battle will end when you walk up my staircase
(106) This’ll be your time Freddy (087) we won’t be sending you to heaven
(173) We’ll be ripping all your heads off (049) like that girl in ‘87
(087) And now for your next show, (049) our rhymes will murder (173) you old abominations
(All) You guys can never compare, to the SCP Foundation!

Who Won?
You Decide!
Stay Tuned For The Next Rap Battle!



Five Nights At Freddy's vs The SCP Foundation

SEASON 2 COMING NEXT YEAR

Matthew Thomas as Hoody
Frenzy as Masky
Mancha as Ticci Toby
WoodenHornets as The Observer
B-Lo Lorbes as HABIT
Justin Buckner as Slenderman

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF CREEPYPASTA!
HOODY!
VERSUS!
MASKY!
BEGIN!

Hoody:
Coming in this battle to attack, it’s the hooded horror from hell
Are you suppose to be scary or something? I can’t freaking tell!
Because you’re crappy Masky, you ain’t having much luck
You’re face is so ugly, you need a mask just to cover it up
Slendy picked me first because he knew I could get the job done
As compared to your broken legs, so there is nowhere for you to run
Go back to your cheesecake, this isn’t the place for you
Because to tell the truth, you’re the laughingstock of the crew

Masky:
I’ve murdered my friend, so killing you won’t be tough
Because I’m coming in rough, let me know when you’ve had enough
Your body will match your red eyes once I’m done with you
Because pointing a gun at Alex was the best your ass could ever do
Getting killed on the job? that’s workplace fatality
Because you’re falling off your game like how you fell off the balcony
I’m coughing because I’m spitting so ill it’s nasty
When you wake up you’ll realize, you’ve fallen prey to Masky

Ticci Toby:
Sh-Shut up Masky, w-watch as your deaths tick closer
You’re about to get ter-rekt, Hoody is nothing but a poser
Influenced by evil; the one turned true creepypasta villain
You can hide your faces all you want, I’ll always be killing
Feed you to the ticks, make you both forever suffer 
I don’t give a shit what I do and I don’t ca-care i-if I stutter 
Stop being so weak, I’ve actually moved on from my past
You’re not my first victims and YOU WON’T BE MY LAST

The Observer:
It’s The Observer here, oh I’m sorry, am I interrupting?
I will never rest, with these disses, you’ll be corrupting
I don’t Noah how you kids think your rhymes are effective
Your defective little minds can’t handle my lyrics so hectic
Happy Birthday to you! and good luck in the afterlife 
Because while I attack your mind, you attack with little knives
This transmission is complete, just like your lives, I’m done
Because you little bitches just lost to proxy #1

HABIT:
It’s time for you to see the words I’m spitting, call me Habit
I’m rapidly dissing these maggots, snapping ‘cause I’ve just about had it!
You’ll get mind fucked when I teleport you everywhere
You’re all twitching jokes, while I’m Everyman’s Hybird nightmare!
Insanity is the last thing to worry about when facing me
Because to be honest, you fuckers were already crazy!
Leave this battle, no Observer or masked kids will make it stop!
Even compared to Slender Man, I’ll always be on top!

Slenderman:
I’m towering over, your leader has Arrived
Don’t adjust your screen, what’s happening is live
Static attacking, got 8 tentacles I’m packing
Catching my proxies, to leave the bodies stacking
I’ve been feared by millions, I’m even known to kill a man
I’m tall, dark and handsome, you can call me the Slender Man
Beating Jeffy as much times as the pages I show
Then these five came in my wake just standing in my Shadow
Slenderman, Slenderman, the children run, like you should do
You oughta know I’m used to killing 12 year old girls like you
Know you shouldn’t be a hater, in front of your savior
You’re nothing but my little baiters, and I’m your creator

WHO WON?
WHO’S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP B- *static* ATTLES OF *static* CREEPYP- *static*


Hoody vs Masky. Epic Rap Battles of Creepypasta 15

Welcome to Season 2!

Matthew Thomas as Mario
Frenzy as Sonic.exe and I HATE YOU
Stoff as Sally.exe


EPIC RAP BATTLES OF CREEPYPASTA!
MARIO!
VERSUS!
SONIC.EXE!
TWO!
BEGIN!

MARIO:
I’m stepping into this 16 bit hell, you know your life will not end well
It’sa me Mario fool, with these rhymes, you’ll be impaled
You’re the fastest thing alive? But you still can’t run from me
It’s too late to change your mind, you’ll be left with Yoshi
You better commit suicide, that’s the selfish way out
Your eyes won’t be able to be found
Look into my heart, I’M FILLED WITH MALICE
You want real fear? Just step to the Yellow Switch Palace!
Challenge me again? You’ve triggered your own end!
You’ll never try to find me when I make this face again!

Sonic.exe:
Time for round 2, well this should be a breeze
Just ask all of my victims, you can’t escape Sonic.EXE
I took away the life of Tom, why should you even try
How can you call yourself scary when all you do is hide
Just admit it that I’m your god, you better fucking bow
You can never escape my hell, I’ll be your god for now
My eyes may be blood-shot, but I can still see
My victory was a true success, wouldn’t you agree?

MARIO:
NO I WOULDN’T! Wipe the blood from your eyes or I’ll nail ya!
Unlike you, my story is true, you were made by a failure
Watch out, this type of file may harm your hard drive
Point Of Advice: You’ll never make it out alive!

Sonic.exe:
I’ll rip out your guts, eat them when they’ve dried
How can you call yourself a threat? You commited suicide
So many disses to spit, but so little time
Just sit back and watch, like you did when I arrived

MARIO:
I AM GOD NOW, YOU JUST MILKED THOUSANDS OF SEQUELS 
What’s in this question block? It’ll be your doom, you fool
It’s the end now for you, you’ve lost to the one and only MARIO!
Time to bring in my brother bitch, LET’S-A GO

I HATE YOU:
I hate your rhymes so much, I’m the one with the flow 
Once you go into the Sunken Ghost Ship, you’ll scream “OH GOD NO!”
Why won’t you die? I swear to god, I’ll jump on your corpse for an eternity
Your pasta was so bad, that it got moved to the Trollpasta wiki!

Sonic.exe:
You’re in my world now, So don’t try to escape
You’re just a “creepy” picture, with your mouth agape
My burns are hotter than the fires of Green Hill
It’s time to get somebody else to rap for me, come in Sally, my love

Sally.exe:
Those rhymes from you were not perfect, I’ll give you a bunch of bruises
I might have my eyes stitched closed, but I can still see you losing
I HATE YOU, you were just a failed mistake
A fat plumber fighting me? Ha, just gimme a break!

MARIO:
You actually think it’s okay to send some furry abortion out to fight me?
You’ve stooped too low this time, Sonic.EXE
Unlike you, I don’t need a team to ensure defeat
A second game over, a second time you’ve been beat

Sonic.exe:
There was no hope for you to win in the first place
You can’t run away from me, I win every single race
Sonic.exe has won this game, it was great for you to play with me
I wanna have more fun, ready for round 3?

WHO WON?
WHO’S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF CREEPYPASTA!

Ahh Real Monsters vs Monsters Inc. Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons Special

Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons

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