written/performed by: erik eliot


I want to be an individual.
You know the type of person who 
isn’t afraid to think backwards or,
be skeptical of looking forwards or,
towards the future?

I want to be that one face that actually
stands out from the crowd.
Speaking my mind so loud to the heavens…
that even God wouldn’t rest his head on the seventh.

But then I think to myself,
“What does it even mean to be an individual nowadays?”
Wait!
Give me a chance to
rephrase that statement—
but it ended with such an emphasized expression
which now actually validates my previous statement as a question
so,
I guess I’ll ask it again…
What does it even mean to be an individual nowadays?

Shit I don’t even know.
Do you?
 
So I look up,
and ask even louder this time…
“WHAT DOES IT EVEN MEAN TO BE AN INDIVIDUAL NOWADAYS?”

We’ve all been told at one point in our lives,
that being an individual is to be yourself,
and to love yourself—
But there’s no help in helping yourself
when you’re relying on God’s help
instead of yourself.

If you break shit down to lamens terms,
it just becomes the lamest terms.
We love with the heart on the sleeve
but what if we all wore cut-off-t’s 
with no hearts or sleeves?
We grieve and sob for all the wrong reasons
when we can just be admiring the beauty
and the plainness of the ever interchanging seasons.

But that’s like saying,
 “Live your life to the fullest,”
without any doubts or fears.
And that makes no sense to me
like a Dodger fan rockin’ Angel gear.
And that’s like saying, 
“Hey! Drive your own life, without any clutch or gears.”

But you won’t understand it until
you’re out and doin’ it—
realize that your life’s a pile of shit
so go ahead and put your foot in it
coz’ you can leave tracks and walk backwards
and see what you were doin’ with it 
like those times when it became so hard…
you were just tempted to quit.

Be yourself and love yourself
but don’t ever be another self
coz’ all you’ll have is another self to blame
when you could have been that other self.
So go ahead and put your new life back up on the shelf.
And have trust in yourself
and you will have a better self
so you won’t feel so tiny
as if you were a fuckin’ elf.
We all know we are we just gotta find our inner-self.
Then you can finally say that you’re in love with no one but yourself.
And then you can have the time to go and find that other self.
And if you ever
find that one person…
You make sure you stare into those eyes shaped like butterfly wings
and you ask them,
“What does it even mean to be an individual nowadays?”

You see,
life can become extremely difficult at times.
Feeling unable to speak your mind like a,
wordless mime—
but rest assured that 
that feeling will dematerialize sometime.
And when it finally does have trust in yourself 
to tell yourself that,
“That I know what it means to be an individual nowadays.”


Individuality

performed by erik eliot

I played connect the dots with your beauty marks
And I ended up with picture perfect sheet music
I read your musical notes with a composer's eyes
And heard our song for the first time
My spine is still tingling, mental images of your fine tune
is what I've been nodding my head to lately
Every now and then you can catch me humming
your nudity under my heavy breath
I heavily suggest you resurrect
your ancient neglected dust collector
If you distrust the distance in my seldom plucked heart strings
Sit stripped before your full length
Perform your reflection backwards
Maybe then you will understand the rhythm in my movement
Listen when the news is sent
Extend when the rules are bent
I'll be waiting to take your leave
Make me a victim of your two step
Make me an apprentice of your body parts
Teach me to dance to your beauty marks
I'm stepping on toes here and I don't care
It's hopeless, it's hopeless
It's hopelessnes
It's hopelessness holding this openness to blow a kiss
So close your lips but don't get pissed
and throw a fist at this vocalist
I'm not emotionless, in fact I broke my wrist
when I wrote the list of all those I miss
This is my poker face, Mister Feel Nothing


Hopeless (Poem by Sage Francis)

written & performed by erik eliot

Let the melody of our hearts lift the frowns caused by past lovers,
friends, as well as acquaintances.
The type of shit that forces city street kids in ghettos to nod their heads back and forth in confusion or acceptance to their social status.

You see, I have been with females 
who have taught me right from wrong and now I'm writing my wrongs.
Girls who have shown me the true me--
only to further cripple my chances of living my life and becoming the "me" my parents wanted me to be.
Crippled.
Crippled...
Yet I still stand still, allowing the bullshit to manifest into my worst fears.

Nightmares becoming reality.
Reality disillusioned with nightmares.
Go to sleep child...
go to sleep--
there is no time for dreaming.

So I stand here, attempting to have creativity somehow blend smoothly with individuality, but it's not quite working.
I am a dying art.
I am a dying nonexistent breed. 
People often say that each person has their own unique match somewhere out there in this pale planet--
lost and looking, some completely give up searching entirely...
while others risk it all just to say, "I love you."

I am me.
I am me.

Take a step back for a second and truly listen to what I have to say.
Open your ears and let me be your voice of reason.
Your blood flowing like a river of innocence.
Let it resonate.
Let it flow.
Break down your walls, and let me in.
This is not a public service announcement.
This is real fucking life--
live it, don't just exist in it.


The kaleidoscope

written & performed by erik eliot

what's the rush?
i'll adjust my must
need to lust and crush
these lush rushed feelings i feel...
or shouldn't feel for you.

Let’s pace the space
Erase but retrace
Hearts race
I race! (erase)
Moments of you. 

Combine our minds
Re-define love intertwine
Rewind love like,
You of moments, or
Moments of you.

You escapes my language
But my words center around you,
Trying sit close to you…
As close as I can get.

Stay within your reach
Your speech narrarates between
The wild and the weak
And the style and meek
And the smiles and the speak
And the aisles of the week
Everytime that you speak love?!


erikeliot