These songs are amazing Eve.  I'm so glad I found your music. You have real songwriting talent. 👏👏👏

Low Sun

How I Really Feel

A version of the Metta mantra that I learned on retreat

May I be safe and protected

I wrote this song when I was in the very early days of grieving for my Dad, who died by suicide in the Autumn of 2017. I couldn't do anything, apart from slow, quiet walks around our home. One day I sat by the Menai Strait and began to sing a little mantra that I came up with, and I felt my creative self wake up as I thought, 'I wonder if I could make this into a round?'

I have always wanted to write a round, as I love singing them in groups. I love to feel the waves of the sound grow and swell. So I sat on the rocky shore and began the task of writing each melody line so that it would harmonise and sit well with every other line in the song. It was a beautiful way to take my mind of things, and I believe it was the first thing I focused on properly after my world changed. I was starting to wake up again from the deep hibernation of early grief.

The words were inspired by a book someone gave me at the time called The Wild Edge of Sorrow, by Francis Weller. This book helped me find some kind of sense in amidst the well of sadness I was feeling, and I grew to know that without grief we cannot have joy. The two are woven together. This period of my life was one of acute pain and loss, and also of intense beauty and gratitude for this life

Wash Over Me

If all my tears were in the sea
I'd let her waves wash over me
I'd like to spend these holy days
With my grief, so close to praise

Wave Upon Wave

Wash Over Me

Penned as a good old fashioned love song... to the sea...

The Sea 

I’m not making history
I leave no footprints in the sea
I flood my mind, I’m drunk on water
She’s a wave, I never caught her
I love to watch her crash and break
She leaves me breathless in her wake

The sun dips down below her lines
I’ve seen her rise a thousand times
I wake up with her every morning
I’m out of bed, and without warning
I walk down to her steady shore
She leaves me breathless, wanting more

I can find her anywhere 
I close my eyes and she is there 

All my tears are in the sea 
I let her waves wash over me
I’d like to spend these holy days 
With a grieving heart, so full of praise 
Here I am, here’s my soul
Pull me in and swallow me whole 

She doesn’t ask me what’s my name
She never asks me why I came 
Without a sound she pulls me in 
Sees me sinking, helps me swim 
When I’m hurting, living, learning
I drop my struggles, I am surfing

I can find her anywhere 
I close my eyes and she is there 

Am I losing, am I winning?
No, she doesn’t really care 
Am I sinking, am I swimming?
That doesn’t happen when she’s there

I’m not making history
I leave no footprints in the sea
I flood my mind, I’m drunk on water
She’s a wave, I never caught her
I love to watch her crash and break
She leaves me breathless in her wake

The Sea

Siren Song about waking up to your voice as a woman, and rising up from the patriarchal system that wants to silence and sexualise us. Some songs come to me fully formed, and this is one of them. I wrote it in about twenty minutes. I was doing a lot of reading and processing about women’s liberation at the time, and the ways in which we have been conditioned to predate upon each other and ourselves. When I go swimming in the sea or in the lakes, I feel like my natural self. In the song there’s a sense of yearning to be able to return to this natural self, and shed the gender conformity, stereotypes and conditioning that I’ve accumulated over the years of living within societal pressures. “I came here as a young girl, before it got to me, did I lose her in the water, well it’s time to set her free” captures this idea of jumping into the water and leaving that all behind on the shore. 

Siren Song

I long to take these clothes off
And jump into the lake
I’ve woken up from dreaming 
And now I feel awake

The water looks inviting 
Like the warmest cold I know
Miles of blue around me
And nowhere left to go

I came here as a young girl 
Before it got to me
Did I lose her in the water?
Well it’s time to set her free

Her rivers are unending 
And they flow into the sea
Flow into the sea
And in and out of me

They paint me as a siren
As a song they want to learn
They put me on this island
And I watch their passion burn

But I am not a siren
I’m a woman with a voice
I came here to reclaim it
I came here for a choice 

My rivers are unending
And they flow into the sea 
I ask you just to listen
Don’t try to capture me

My rivers are unending 
And they flow into the sea
Flow into the sea 
And in and out of me

Siren Song

Being in Love

Doorways to the Heart: Transforming everyday life - now

This workshop is an invitation to explore what it means to be in love - with yourself, with your life, with the people around you. 

Living with a deep yes to "me and all that I am, and you and all that you are".

Every day we are opening and closing our heart. Something happens, somebody speaks to us and we close down. Or the other way around. Something happens, somebody speaks to us and suddenly our heart is open. Are we only victims of life or circumstances or is there something for us to learn? In any case, we all have our habitual ways of shutting down, triggers that 'get' to us. And we know too how wonderful it feels when we open to the world, giving of ourselves generously and letting the world into our being, letting it touch us in both joy and sorrow.

I know the pain of shutting down, contracting in fear or shame, or sometimes rigid with anger or blame. I remember the hardness of my closed heart, stuck in shame or fear, in blame or judgement, struggling to get out or busy, trying to ignore it, distracted. I know the sense of imprisonment and helplessness that this gave me.

I know, too, the tender, raw softness of my open heart, the generosity, abundance, gratitude, pouring myself out into the world. I know in opening again, the radiant trembling, flowing, glowing, giving, melting.

"Doorways to the Heart" a journey to let go of the past and welcome each moment as an opportunity to consciously open our hearts to welcome whatever arises within us. It is a journey into friendship with ourselves, a letting go of the struggle and a doorway into joyful, heart-centred living.

This weekend is an opportunity and an invitation:
- to release the contraction in our own heart 
- to bring more consciousness to the ways we shut down 
- to experience giving and receiving love 
- to explore simple practices that we can use in our daily life as doorways to the heart

Doorways to the Heart is not about how to be nice. It is about learning, through experiencing, to give and receive authentic gifts of the heart, and to grow in compassion, empathy, friendliness, courage and trust. 

As we learn to trust in the resilience and strength of our own heart, we can open to the depth of our feelings, even the most painful, without getting lost or drowned in them, and we can enjoy an ever deepening connection with ourselves, the world around us and with spirit.

The weekend will include guided processes in small groups, meditations, dance, sharing circles and touch.

Being in Love

Brev fra Amerika

Tankens runer

22min Passive Voice Audio

Pellter is the Welsh word for distance. I wanted to open the conversation about the reality of loving someone who cannot love themselves at that point in time. About how hard that can be. I lost my beautiful Dad to suicide, and I carry this knowing with me. Like my shadow, my grief will always be there, but I am learning to dance with it and process it through creative expression.

This is a song for the friends, family and the carers who know this journey.
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Nes i sgwennu'r gân Pellter am garu rhywyn sy'd dioddef o broblem iechyd meddwl, a'u bod nhw'n teimlo'n bell i ffwrdd. Rydw i wir eisiau agor y sgwrs am realiti'r sefyllfa hon, y pellter sydd yn cael ei greu pan na allwn gysuro rhywun, a'r ymdeimlad o golled a galar. Mae'r gân yn godyn: sut allwn ni bontio'r gwagle rhyngom ni a'r un sy'n dioddef?

Dyma gân i'r ffrindiau, y teulu a'r gofalwyr sy'n adnabod y llwybr hwn.
---------------------------------

Pellter

Mae’r ysbryd yn chwarae yn y nos
A’r gannwyll yn llosgi yn y gornel
Dwi yma hefo calon sydd wedi agor
A dagrau yn llifo fel yr afon

Mae fy nhad ar goll yn y nos
A’r gannwyll yn llosgi yn y gornel
Dwi’n clywed o’n siarad mewn iaith arall
Dwi’n gwrando ond fedrai ddim deall

Mae’r pellter yn rhy bell i neidio X 4

Dwi’n galw dy enw at y lleuad
Ac adrodd hen weddi at y ddaear
Arogli’r glaw yn disgyn ar y llwch
A ceisio gweld amlinell yn y mwg

Mae’r pellter yn rhy bell i neidio X 4

Rho un tro i mi x4

-------

Distance

There’s a ghost playing in the night
And a candle burns in the corner
I’m here with an open heart
And my tears are flowing like the river

My father is lost in the night
And a candle burns in the corner
I hear him speak another language
I listen but I cannot understand

The distance is too far to jump x4

I call your name to the moon
And recite and old prayer to the earth
I smell the rain falling onto dust
And seek your outline in the smoke

Give me a chance x4

Pellter

Pellter By Eve Goodman

Singer, songwriter, performer and vocal improviser from Gogledd Cymru (North Wales)

"If you sit, listen and wait, this beautifully crafted new folk light, will unveil earth, soul and a deep connection to what it is to be human in these troubled, inspiring times.” -Caspar Walsh, poet & author

How I Really Feel

Eve Goodman

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