This is about girls trying to find an orgasm.

Bright Eyed Jenny
Trackin' down the Yeti
Fall into a cavern
Crawl through the depths

Bright-Eyed Jenny
Lookin' very pretty
Strapping in her climbing gear
Lantern on her head 

You lost itX4

Chorus:
ELF Antennae
Don't you wish you had a pair
ELF Antennae 
Look so pretty with your hair
ELF Antennae
Piercing radar, through and through
ELF Antennae
I've got mine and so can you

Redhead Bessie
Hunting down a Nessie
Far below the surface
Hiding in the depths

Redhead Bessie
Ready for the messy
Skintight diving flippers
Harpoon in her hand

You lost it X4

Chorus

Princess Abigail
Chasin' down a beaver trail
Hidin' by the riverside
Lurking in the trees

Princess Abbey
Lookin' like she's ready
Bustin' up a DAM
With her TNT

You lost it X8

ChorusX2

ELF Antennae

Out of ammo, got no gun
No more cocktails, no more fun
Special Agent, you're the one
Go save the day

Maybe someday you can go
Roam the fields of New Tripoli
Until then you are the only
Ray of light 

Special Agent Mitzi of the Mouse Patrol
Infiltrates the embassy in Rome
Scaling up the towers of the Berlin Wall
Sneaking past the guards to get back home

I can't help, you're the best
Pills and bottles, you're a mess
Sweat it out and have a rest
Now you're okay

Back to work, priorities
Infiltrate the enemy
Gut those vermin, burn their fleas
Hooray

Special Agent Mitzi of the Mouse Patrol
Secret Bases hidden in the Alps
Lighting up the fuel supply to watch them run
"Mitzi, show us Mercy", "I'm Fresh Out"

Special Agent Mitzi of the Mouse Patrol
Snatching Vermin tumbling through the Sky
Slicing up the Parachuters with her claws
Cackling as they Hit the Ground and Die

Think it's over, now you're through
Here's a dispatch, just for you
One last mission, stage a coup
And Stay Alive

Mike India Tango Zed
Injun Reds, up in your head
Mouse Patrol won't make you dead
If you can hide

Special Agent Mitzi of the Mouse Patrol
Going all the places she can't go
Message from the High Command, "You've lost Control"
Yanked her license, put her on furlough

Special Agent Mitzi of the Mouse Patrol
Staring down the barrel of a Gun
Wretched are the fuckers who corrupt your soul
If you hear me sing then I am one

When Mitzi Lays upon a Sunbeam in my windowsill
The clouds are burst apart by swishes from her raccoon tail
And all the birds are singings, "Mitzi come outside to play"
She whispers, 
"Messengers of Death, I'll be released from here someday."

FelixtheHelixFanClub@gmail.com

Special Agent Mitzi Of The Mouse Patrol

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hunt_the_Wumpus

FelixtheHelixFanClub@gmail.com

Hunt The Wumpus

send an email to FelixtheHelixFanClub@gmail.com to get on the mailing list. 

Howl

Leaves are yellow, mud is brown,
Autumn hillside, twilight now
I look down the valley
To the forest.

I've been on his trail so long.
Months have passed without that song. 
I feel cold and Hungry and exhausted. 

Thousand miles behind me,
Empty bed where my wife sleeps,
If I came back now, would she still love me. 
Maybe everyone is right, I heard coyotes in the night
Suddenly, the call from down the valley...

Now I'm standing by the stream, 
Heart is drumming, breath like steam,
Staring at the footprint
In the mudbank.

He was here moments ago,
Had a drink and took it slow,
Seeing his reflection in the water.

Today's the day I shoot him dead,
Photographs, collect his head
When I get back home, I'll be hero.
Sorry, Felix, you were right, 
You heard Sasquatch in the night
Tell us all again, how did the howl go...

Night descends, I'm closing in
Can't contain my madman grin
Gibbous moon illuminates the foot trail

In a meadow, spot my prey
Down on one knee, I take aim,
Before I can shoot, he turns to see me

Monster stiffens, then he's gone
Standing long jump five miles long, 
I was so close, how did he surprise me?
Is this what my life will be?
Come so close to victory
Now the call over comes the horizon. 


Howl

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If you are a sad girl on the internet I will sing to you. Email or DM my Twitter.

Felix the Helix