I'm All Ears

Have you ever been so weak at the knees that you came crashing down?
Scared of the future.
Where the choice you made to keep wondering is the thief that stole your golden crown.

I'm in some kind of head space, a place where the problem is setting the pace.
I'm running fast as i can go, but it keeps on catching up. 
In my room I can spend my time so comfortably.
But the walls keep closing in on me.

Can't seem to tear it down, with the strength of a hundred horses.
Yet, I choose to let the fear build it's walls in my way.
Just know that I would take a bullet in the chest for a stranger, or almost anyone in fact. 
But they wouldn't do the same for me.

I feel the cold white teeth.
The mouth of fear eats me whole.

Every second the tremors worsen, and the fabric of what I am turns to dust.

Yeah, well I know.. I can't do everything, I can't be everywhere at once - But god, I try.
Taking back the times that I forgot to smile.
I think it's time, I need to measure my worth.
It's not a heartless world, but sometimes it hurts.
It's not a heartless world, however it may seem.

You might think it's daunting to measure the length of the journey you have to walk to be free. (Your escape)
Put yourself in the path of danger as you break through all these walls.
Point your glasses toward the sky, realise that fear isn't real at all.

I am free now.

I feel the cold white teeth.
The mouth of fear eats me whole,

I'm afraid that it's shaped me.
I'm afraid that one day, the people I love and trust, will someday hate me.
I keep losing sleep.
I fear everything, and it eats me whole.

I feel the cold white teeth.
The mouth of fear eats me whole.

And with all this said, i know what has to be done. 
I have to slip through the gaps in fear and follow the path into the sun.

I know I'll find freedom there.


 

Fear

YES, THE CLOUDS ARE SMILING


does it cross your mind sometimes that some day everyone will die?
and does it make you shiver, even though it's the reality of life?
death tears a hole 
right through the middle of our families, its imperative that we 
do what we can to protect the branches of our family tree.

your loved ones gone, you're feeling so alone, what would you give just to know
when you look into the sky, above the clouds, they're looking down, with a smile?
 
i know it feels like you're on your own
(you're not on your own)   
keep counting memories, and trust their precense in the in the flickering light that guides your way home

because you're gone but not forgotten

suddlenly, it will become clear. a voice just sounded through the clouds. 
your loved ones gone, you're feeling so alone, what would you give to know
when you look into the sky, above the clouds, they're watching over you.

just be brave, i'll see you soon.

if you've suffered a loss, a blow to your bow, (then you'll know) the clouds are closer than you think
(we wont be here for long) 

so, live for today. 
it won't be long, i'll see you soon.
 

Yes, The Clouds Are Smiling

it takes a certain kind of man, to take another man's life.
oh, how bad could it be to wear the conscience of a murderer, lying next to my bride, while the angels sing me to sleep.

is a guilty shadow, upon a pure mind a horrible fucking place for person to be? or does the cool air provide a place where one can run, hide and grieve.

put your hands over your children's eyes, we're in the business of taking lives. 
so don't worry baby, write a list of the people you want taken out.

on the first day, we started practicing the easiest way to discard a body. 
the operation can come unraveled easily, if they find the remains.
and a few months in, it became less like a job and more of a hobby.
portion up the posthumous, and turn their bones to dust.  it's my holiday.

a murderer. is that what you wanna be? 
do you wanna hear the shells whistle in the breeze, as they are ejected from the gun, and ricochet.
hear them ring like tiny bells as they fall down to your feet? 

I'm colder than ice. with a temper like a flame. 
dismemberment, the sweet sound is music to my ears.

sometimes, i make the headlines. where they proclaim I'm sent from hell.
it's hard to overlook the fact that I'll be going back one day as well.
sometimes, the devil follows me, breathing on the back of my neck. 
I'd like to think, that there is a god and he remembers the seed from which i came.
that he see's through the man that i have become, and welcomes me in when i knock on his door.
when the angels sing their song once more.

This is Someone's Honest Living

The Space Between the Notes

Liars Sink

I'm broken, and trampled on. I'm trying to recover. I didn't think it would be this hard. I apologise if I seem distant, i've got a lot on my mind. 

I'm sorry for wasting your year. I'm sorry I stopped you from changing gears. I'm so sorry, I guess i'm sorry for being down.

So long, this is the last time, when you walk away from me, you walk away from everything.

How about you pull me up? Remember all the times I was there for you. And the countless things I sacrificed. I would of taken a bullet for you. I'm still sorry, I guess I'm sorry for being down, but thanks for having me around.

What a different man I would be, if I could just turn back the clock and erase everything.

Yeah, i've been places. Dark places I never thought I'd end up in, not in a million years.

I'm strong, but still I falter. Tell your son, when he grows older, I died with the weight of the world on my shoulders.

But I'm just a man, just a man, after all. Tell me what's a man, what's a man, supposed to do when he's lost himself? Who's he got to rely on?

Oh, I know, I'll pay for what I've done. I don't need you to tell me it's wrong. Oh, I know, I've kept it bottled up to long, but now it's my turn to speak - I'll say whatever the fuck I want. 

The stress you see, externally, ain't half of what's inside. And the sweat I bleed, ain't nearly equal to the flood behind my (eyes) can see you're changing.

Your true colours are fading. 

This is the Bottom.mp3

It's always nice to catch up with old friends, and make up for lost time. The kind of friends where you can talk about the weather forever and still be intersted. The kind of friends who'll be there rain, hail or shine. I'm so lucky to have some of these friends in my life. I've been thinking of how to repay everyone for all they've done for me. When I know that all they want is to see me make a full recovery. I've been thinking of how to repay everyone for all they've done for me. When I know that all they want is a friend like that in me. It's the person that I used to be. I guess this life got a hold of me.

Yeah, it got a hold, but it only got a hold of my shirt. So I turned around and made life my bitch. So I took it by the horns, and made life my bitch. But the strength that I had was only half mine, I've gotta say thank you for giving me strength, for never leaving my side, for being my friend.

All the memories of being at such great heights with no fear at all because there's someone at the bottom holding a safety net, at the base of every building in town. The thought crosses my mind from time to time, if i was to fall straight down. Would anyone be there? But i know the answer. 

Thank you to all my people.
You should know exactly who you are.
You're the ones that made the good times better.
You dug me up when I was in over my head.
Yeah, sure, I'm not around these days as much as I was before.
But I hope you know, if you ever need someone, I'll be right there at your door.

It's nice to know, if I ask a question, I'll get an honest answer. And it will be void of judgement, no strings attached, for it's simply just to help me out.

Look at me when i tell you "I'm so grateful for everything".
For everything you've done for me.
I know you don't expect a thing, but shut the fuck up, you deserve it.

So I wanna say thank you to all my people.
You should know exactly who you are.
You're the ones that made the good times better.
You dug me up when I was in over my head.
And I'm aware, I'm not around these days as much as I was before.
Just so you know, if you ever need someone, I'll be right there at your door.






Friends.mp3

Full Blown AIDS Ft. Dirty B, & Queen Crustacean

Long ago, it became clear to me what I what most from life, from here on out, it's time I make a decision before it’s too late.

I’ve known for so long, following my feet instead of following my dreams would get me no where in the end..

I can’t believe I’ve waited so long for a sign. As if the sky above would open up for me.
Can you hear the stars whistling? Can you see them glow? Coz I can hear them taunting me.
“it’s your lack of drive, your lack of motivation, there ain’t anyone else holding you back but yourself”
So I made myself everything i am today, my own blood sweat and tears and oh, my sanity, is what it took me to get here. 

But I can honestly say it was worth every goddamn second.

I wanna see the beautiful colours reflecting off the gold at the end of the rainbow. It's where i wanna be.

I'd rather die a man than breathe another breath as a hopeless parasite, a hindrance to this earth. I'm my only enemy, I've had enough of this monotony. 

My guide, my guide is more than a flickering light.

I know I'm fading but I just can't seem to help myself, sometimes. These distractions I identified, I eradicated from my life.

This road, this road I walk on, it seems like forever more... Is there a fork approaching somewhere up ahead?
Then suddenly, I can see a street sign, and the sign slowly comes into view I see an arrow with the words "to get where I wanna go"

Don't lose sight in your dreams. I believe in myself, to get where I wanna go.




Glow

teleporting to days in the summer, this cold weather, it numbs me
reminding me that the seasons change and restore the pigment in my eyes    
oh, what a lovely place to set my wings ablaze, slowly spinning round i'm heading for the ground
it's such a warm embrace now that the seasons changed but what i wouldn't give for the rain to put me out.

The Storm Will Cover Our Tracks - Your Shadow Can't Keep A Secret (Vocal Part)

firevsfire is a person that enjoys creating noises with instruments and recording them. this page contains a collection of his musical excerpts.

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