I find myself at a crossroads once again, trapped in a cycle where I'm using distractions to dull the pain I know I have to confront. It’s like life has pulled me back to the starting line, even though I’ve learned, I’ve grown, and I know the value of self-respect and the lessons that come from facing hardship head-on. Yet, despite this awareness, I keep choosing the familiar escape, knowing it only pushes me further away from healing. I want it to stop—it's draining, and degrading, and I'm afraid of where this path will lead if I don’t change. Not long ago, I tasted what life could feel like on the other side—peace, happiness, a glimpse of something better. A Taste of... Heaven.

A Taste of Heaven

A collection of songs I hold close to my heart. All these songs were mixed, mastered, and recorded in Bandlab, showing that if you want something out of your music, you can have it.

Procrastinate

Used To Me

Change(Feat. Liam.)

Chaos

Dead 2 Me

It's a throwaway track that I probably will never use with a sick photo of me in some sunglasses.

Waste Of Time

Serendipity

Figure It Out

Give It Up

Better Than Everything

Second Guessing

We'll Be Fine

Feel So Right

Take It Away

what2do (carie,twix)

second guessing (ft. Unreal)

Can I 
Tell you the truth I’ve had a bad week
Making excuses just so I could sleep 
Tryna write my thoughts when I’m feeling down
I don’t want nobody else I just need myself 

I been tryna find confidence woah 
Past doubts I been blocking them out yeah 
Struggling oh cant you tell

Don’t want nobody else just need my

Make me feel extinct I been running round 
just seeing you in my dream
Don’t know if it was you or 
if it was me and my team
I’m already on go I had feeling 
you’d leave me here to rot away bae
Already knowing that you’re with him now
And I hope that he’s good for you 
I hope you found the one 
I cant keep stressing bout these 
things that are going on

I tried again to make this shit work
One last time
You lied again it made my head hurt 
I’m so done

Hard to explain how I’m feeling right now 
Dealing with change I’m in pain I’ve never felt
Yeah see you again when the sun shine
Done with the pain don’t feel none

myself

some finished, some unfinished.... every track on this album is from a time before I learned how to mix my vocals very well. each song is part of its own story, each one made with a vision. In no specific order, enjoy.

Smile (?)

is this the start (?)

Sky (ezy)

whatuuugottasay?

"Ataraxia" is about the duality we all experience—the constant push and pull between chaos and peace. The name itself means a state of serene calmness, but the Chaos Star on the cover flips that idea on its head. It’s not just about calmness or chaos on their own—it’s about living in the space where the two meet. Life isn’t perfect, and sometimes the beauty comes from learning to navigate the storm while still finding those rare moments of stillness.

For me, the album represents that struggle. Each song dives into a different layer of that tension. There are moments of vulnerability where I’m reflecting on my inner battles, and then there are moments where I’m embracing the chaos, letting it fuel my creativity. I wanted this album to feel raw and real, like a reflection of the human experience—messy, beautiful, and full of contradictions.

It’s also about the journey toward balance. A lot of people think balance means eliminating the negative, but I think it’s more about learning to coexist with it. The chaos teaches you things. The peace gives you clarity. Together, they shape who you are.

So, if you listen to "Ataraxia," you’ll hear a little bit of everything: emotional highs and lows, introspective lyrics, and soundscapes that move between haunting and tranquil. It’s my way of saying, “Yeah, life is complicated, but there’s something beautiful in that complexity.”

Gavin Ross

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