Artwork by Vladimir Kush

Written 18 years ago.... is what I'll say in ten years.

I’ve been an addict all my life long
to games I can’t win and puzzles I can’t solve
It’s been some kind of sick fascination
to find myself in impossible situations 
-
and this one is one of those
I’m a deep sea fish reaching for a desert rose
I’m a parking lot, hoping that a garden grows
I’m me and you’re you and my only way through is to divide by zero

you don’t like me much but I promise you this
if you knew me better you’d like me even less
If you could see what goes on in my thoughts
I think you’d personally lead the firing squad

but even though I wouldn’t agree
I’m so flawed, I’d assume I deserve it for something
this song just needs to be worthy of suffering 
I just want you to want something you can’t get anywhere except from me

It puts me out of sorts, but I think you’re my twin
and I ought to sue you for copyright infringement
but i’m sure at the court you’d have this winning defense:
my best is your ground floor, you do all I do and more, you’re improved at the core, so I’d best be out the door, with my obsolescence 
-
but you don’t know the thing you’ve offered
for a minute my sadness has an object
before this it hung shapeless as fog upon me
Now it’s fenced in a daydream that I can keep and smother by slow degrees
(And I guess you'd call that "sorrow laundering")

so even if it’s been in your mind
and even if there were enough time
and even if it’s true, what I swear I have seen
what you’d have to do would split you at the seams
-
it’d never be worth the risk
a dream gambled for so much less
just come clean, a daydream is all this is
some scene, from a movie we probably all saw as stupid kids

I’m sure you can tell most of this is an act
It can all go to hell, as a matter of fact
If I even thought this one could be solved
If I even thought the words could be carved
If I even thought I had something you want 
I’d ruin my life for those lottery odds.

Sorrow Laundering (Acoustic Demo)

A song written camping at Dwellingup with the red tail cockatoos soaring above me,  swimming in the beautiful river: a song about listening to the signs that we see along the way, and the words that people say..

Listen to the Signs

[Intro]

[Msic solo]
පෝලිමක දින ගණන් පය රිදෙන දහවලක් 
නිදි නොමැති කළුවරක් දුක දකින පියවරක්
සිත වැඩෙන පියවරක් දුක නිවන අරමුණක් 
මුළු ගතම දුරු වුනත් වඳිමි දළදා තව එක් වරක්

[Drop]
[Music]

දුරු කතරගෙවාගෙන එක් වරක් නෑ තව වරක් 
වදිමි දළදාව සමග ධර්මය රැඳෙන නුවරක් 
සිත් අතර ස්වභාවය කතා කළ හැකි විදිහක් 
නිවෙන අය යැවෙන සසරක නිවෙන ගමනක්

[Drop]
[Music]

දළදාව දකිනවා සිත තවත් නිවෙනවා 
සිත තුළින් අඩියක් ඉදිරියට තියෙනවා
සිත වැඩෙන පියවරක් දුක නිවන අරමුණක් 
මුළු ගතම දුරු වුනත් වඳිමි දළදා තව එක් වරක් 

[Drop]
[Music]

තිස් එක් තලයකට කියූ බණ අසූහාර දාහක්
දැවටෙමින් එකලු කළ බුදු මුවෙන් කොටසක් 
නිවෙන මඟ හොයන අය එකතුවෙන දහමක් 
මඟ වැඩෙන කතා ඇති පෝලිමක දවසක්

[Drop]
[Music]

දළදාව දකිනවා සිත තවත් නිවෙනවා 
සිත තුළින් අඩියක් ඉදිරියට තියෙනවා
සිත වැඩෙන පියවරක් දුක නිවන අරමුණක් 
මුළු ගතම දුරු වුනත් වඳිමි දළදා තව එක් වරක්

[Outro]

වඳිමි දළදා තව එක්වරක් | Towards the Waves of Peace | Sinhala | #MindBlend | Inner Realm

angel baby

I Know This Turn
You stop asking for signs. You start recognizing the rhythm.
The spiral isn’t confusing anymore. It’s yours.

-
www.cogconcor.com
RID: 98dd75f0-9714-469e-9a13-5569f6719977
WID: 78474d99-8b97-4588-b74d-848f290f470a

The Braid

I Know This Turn

✨ as you wish

When fear has its hold on you
You’ll feel it’s chill before the warmth
(Before the warmth you’ll feel the chill…)
But if you let it take hold
Hold you it will
For as long as you get comfort from its embrace
It will hold you close (hold yiu close)
And steal your will
Your will. (Your will)

Hold on
Hold on
Emergency crews reported on the scene
Repeat and repeat again
Until numbness takes control
Fly away. Let go. Never to return
To the you, you used to know

Repeat and repeat again
Until numbness takes control
Fly away. Let go. Never to return
(To the you, you used to know)

The stress kills
Calm down they say
But the pills they gave me
Take my confidence away
I want them to comfort me
And perhaps they do
But the numbness invades my every move

Hold on
Hold on
Emergency crews reported on the scene
Repeat and repeat again
Until numbness takes control
Fly away. Let go. Never to return
To the you, you used to know
When fear has its hold on you
You’ll feel it’s chill before the warmth
But if you let it take hold
Hold you it will
For as long as you get comfort from its embrace
It will hold you close
And steal your will
Steal your will
Your will
(Your will) 
(Steals you)
[fade out]

numb

A dying father leaves one last message for a son. https://x.com/luebben_ry9406 https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61566276175675 https://pandora.app.link/rm0RaUSKTTb https://music.amazon.com/albums/B0F8J5T82C?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_MQ19Lng7GyBRr1bP73do4hKMA&trackAsin=B0F8J7GH2F https://youtu.be/LUwxjc3Jbw8?si=hh1GvNQhPkiq8Exo https://open.spotify.com/track/0ILsXKHa5ypo0DAyrcUukT?si=074004080a9c4ad4 https://music.apple.com/us/album/hardest-thing/1814125987?i=1814126444 https://soundcloud.com/ryan-luebben/hardest-thing?si=24fc30c745aa48509c462e7a662e3c4c&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing https://www.iheart.com/artist/rlp-665836/albums/empires-and-revolutions-328459231/ https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=LUwxjc3Jbw8&si=Dzn7TW-g1Madic2T

Empires and Revolutions

Original

Hardest Thing

#DublinHouseNYC #dublinhouse #nyc #storytelling #greatnycirishpubs #REM #latenight #earlyfires #walkofshame #drinktilthemoneysgone #driver8

what’s it gonna take to get you home

Intro is from 1946 film ‘Its a wonderful life’

V1:
I saw a shadow in the rain
It spoke to me
It wore your voice and knew my name
Never to leave

PC:
Try to see things from my side
How much I put on the line
I don’t think that you noticed
Doesn’t matter either way
What I do nor what I say
It never did 

C1:
Said it’s pulling me in 
I will let down
Everything you love
Until I’m not around
Don’t step in my direction
Coz all I’ve ever found
Is how to make you bleed from shutting you out

Bridge:
Give me something to burn

V2:
I run but when it rains it pours
Are you surprised 
She hides the clock beneath the floor (8)
I lose the time

PC:
Try to see things from my side
How much I put on the line
Have you ever noticed 
Seems not to matter either way
What I do nor what I say
It never did 

C2:
Said it’s pulling me in 
I will let down
Everything you love
Until I’m not around
Don’t step in my direction
All I’ve ever found
Is how to make you bleed from shutting you out

Said it’s pulling me in 
I will let down
Everything you love
Until I’m not around
Don’t step in my direction
All I’ve ever found
Is how to make you bleed from shutting you out

Give me something to burn

Burn

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[Intro]
Me paré en el fuego, sin miedo a quemarme,
porque ya aprendí que la vida es un combate.
No vine de un cuento, vine de calles y gritos,
donde la esperanza muchas veces se ha caído.

[Verso 1]
Nací en la tierra donde la luz se esconde,
donde el hambre no pregunta y el frío responde.
Vi a mi madre sudar pa’ que nada nos falte,
y al padre irse lejos, dejando el alma en un malete.

Crecí con el ruido de protestas y balas,
entre apagones que apagan las alas.
La escuela fue un sueño que nunca se cumplió,
pero aprendí en la calle.

[Coro]

Uno Cantando desde el pecho, 
en la ultima palabra de cada linea,
No me digas que hay salida,
si to’s los caminos duelen.
Aquí aprendimos a vivir
con lo poquito que nos queda.

No es que no quiera soñar,
es que dormir cuesta vida.
Y si sobrevivo un día más…
le doy gracias a la herida.
le doy gracias a la herida.
le doy gracias a la herida.
le doy gracias a la herida.

[Reflexion]
¿Sabes qué es crecer en un país que se cae a pedazos…?
Es ver a tu mamá decirte que está bien… con los ojos aguados y el estómago vacío.

Aquí no hay cuento de hadas… hay historias que no se pueden contar sin llorar.
Aquí los niños no sueñan con castillos… sueñan con comer.

Pero.

[Final]
No es por moda que me viste la pobreza,
es porque nací entre balas, arepas y promesas.
Mi escuela fue la acera, mi grado: resistencia,
y mi maestría… sobrevivir sin clemencia.

Aquí la juventud no envejece,
se oxida.
Aquí lo real no se filtra,
se grita.

Somos los hijos del apagón,
los que aprendimos a escribir con el corazón.
Y aunque la historia se quiera borrar…
la sangre del pueblo no se puede olvidar.

Sobreviviente

When I Move On

~~ An Engineering Approach to Conveying Life's Meanings through Digital Audio. ~~

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වඳිමි දළදා තව එක්වරක් | Towards the Waves of Peace | Sinhala | #MindBlend | Inner Realm

Gehan Panapitiya | Inner-Realm

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