GMOT!

From Burrito To Love (Hearts)

The Pianoman Dies At The End

Sure, You Can Skip This Track (Asshole!)

Play (Pause) Is Not An Option

Lazy Penguins In Yellow Cardigans

Ghost Man On Third - an explanation attempt

Who or what is this "artist" and what the f*** is this “music” all about?
Let me try to find an answer to those questions.

The music of GMOT failed to inspire Vivaldi and is responsible for van Gogh losing his ear. Tracks that even Trump can´t make great again. A dangerous symbiosis of misguided tones, inhuman hubris and burnt cotton candy. Each note so awkwardly written as if the devil himself asked god to deliver him from evil. Every pseudo-hookline yells like Scooter’s and Enya's rejected child, every beat cheaper than ordered from Wish. Being the first brass musician on the moon, Louis Armstrong once said while looking down to earth: "Great, I can't hear that shit up here. What a wonderful world.” His global hit, written in his spaceship, still sells millions of copies to date.

But there is also one positive thing to say about the music of GMOT: You don't have to listen to it. Hence my urgent appeal to you: Try to avoid this nightmare as much as possible. Avoid all streaming services and do not go to big clubs. Unplug the tape recorder and disable the auto-reverse function on your discman. Block the phone numbers of all ringtone providers and cancel your Mad Magazine subscription asap. And please live your life as if GMOT didn’t exist!

With these life hacks for a better taste in music I am heading into the summer holidays, wishing you all the best.

An anonymous MySpace user